The Corner

Lena

“Can you give me one more week before you fly? I don’t like your lungs flying just yet. When you collapse one, it always has an itch to do it again.”

“One week. I want to go home. As much as I love your country, I don’t like the press sticking their nose up my ass every three seconds, calling me a national hero.” I stared at Claire, my old friend and doctor in this situation. “If I stay a week, can we work on pulling out those egregious pins you put in my forearm and use the nubis metal? The body has a 99.9% tolerance rate over the surgical steel you jammed in there.”

“Jammed in there? I’ll have you know, I’m the best orthopedic surgeon in this country.” Claire cocked an eyebrow, crossing her arms as the x-rays of my bones hung over her shoulder. “But yes, we can. I can slip you in tomorrow morning. Just as long as you give me top billing on the research article I know you’ll write as soon as you're out of surgery.”

“You can have the whole damn thing.” I adjusted my arm, wincing at the pain.

Claire pulled my x-rays off the lightboard. “The blonde.”

“Yes?” I laid back in the pillows, frowning when I couldn’t find a comfortable angle.

“Is she who I think she is?” Claire didn’t look at me as she flipped through the pages on my chart.

“If you don’t want me back on the roof, smoking, now is not the time to delve into the blonde pacing outside my room.” I started picking at the edge of my cast. “The nubis metal will eliminate the need for this annoying cast. It has smart technology, the pins will detect movement and lock the joints if rotation is too steep for the break.”

“I know. I helped you design that technology.” Claire paused, shaking her head. “I know who she is. I would spot my work a mile away. The slight hitch in her gait on the right side? I remember repairing her dislocated hip in Syria under the cover of darkness and deep secrets.” She glanced at me, giving me a hard judging look. “I thought you were staying in the shadows with her, repenting from a distance and hoping absolution would come your way. That woman is out there, chewing her nails like an expectant father. Did you birth the baby of rekindled romance? Or is it just pure happenstance her and her sister have been hounding me the second they arrived here?”

I sighed, clenching my jaw. “Would you judge me if I said I couldn’t help myself? I couldn’t stay away. We landed in the same city, I now own the magazine who hired her five days before I signed the takeover.” I paused, turning to look out the open doorway to catch the tail end of Kara hustling after a nurse. “Would you judge me if I said I still love her, and hope that after almost being turned into liquid molten human, I’d find the courage to rewind the last ten years and go back to that night when I fucked everything up? Lost the best thing I ever had?” I turned back to Claire. “I’m a fool, I know.”

“You were a fool ten years ago. A foolish little girl. What I see before me now, is a woman who’s battle her way out of some shit and found her own feet to stand on. I knew the first time you spoke about the blonde in New York, you never let her go. I saw the look in your eyes in Syria, in Berlin. The love mixed with the utter terror of almost losing someone so precious to you.” Claire slid my chart in the bin at the end of my bed. “You’re going to be laid up for a few weeks, even with the nubis pins. You might as well take advantage of the fact you can’t run, and you might need someone to check in on you as you heal and are knocked down to one arm.”

I swallowed hard. “I can’t ask for forgiveness.”

“No, but you can earn it. And if I know you, Lena Luthor, you will do your damndest to earn it. This time, do it face to face, not in the shadows playing guardian angel.” She smiled, patting my blanket covered knee before moving towards the door. “One more thing, fuck Lillian. I truly believe she was jealous you found the love she always thought she deserved.”

I laughed, nodding as Claire left the room. I let out a slow breath, closing my eyes as the adrenaline and pain killers continued to work slowly out of my system, replacing the fuzzy feeling with waves of nagging pain. I hurt. I hurt like a hell and honestly had no idea how I was going to go home, alone, to my empty penthouse and wait for my body to heal. I was used to being alone, but not hurt and one arm down.

“Surgery, tomorrow? I just signed off on the first one. Well, Alex did that for me after I passed out.” Kara fluttered into the room, her hands jammed deep into her pockets. Her eyes were trained to the floor as she moved to the edge of the bed, looking out the window. “I thought we were taking you home in the morning.” Her voice shook ever so slightly under her strong tone. Even her voice had gain an edge over the years.

“I can’t fly for a week with my lung as it is.” I stared at Kara’s back, focusing on her shoulder and the bullet wounds hiding under her shirt. “The surgery tomorrow is to replace the steel pins in my arm with biologically friendly ones. It should lessen my healing time by four weeks.” The tension in the room was thick with everything unsaid between us. “I can arrange to fly you and Alex home.”

I watched Kara roll her shoulders before turning to face me. She was tired, her eyes red and bleary, her cheeks were flushed from the constant pacing. “When was the first time you helped me? Syria?”

I picked at a fingernail, dried blood still stuck under it. “The congo. The hospital you were taken to, I had a few research scientists there, conducting vaccine trials. They recognized your name and panicked, thinking you were there to investigate this top secret project. A memo floated across my desk. I took the first flight out that night. I watched from afar as you strolled out of the place, limping from the stab wounds. After that, it wasn’t that hard to track you. You happened to fall in the same circles of hell I was working in. Biomedical research often goes hand in hand with war torn countries.” I paused, feeling my heart race at how cold and creepy I sounded. “Kara, I.”

“So, it looks like I have about eight and half years to make up for.” She gave me a small smile and rushed out of the room, leaving me very confused.

A handful of odd minutes passed before I gave up, thinking I pissed the woman off and was left in the awkward silence. I reached for my tablet, set on sending Alex a message to please take me up on the offer to fly them home, when Kara burst back in the room, carrying a small plastic bag from the gift shop in the hospital lobby.

“Alex is on her way to the airport, she’s going to hitch a ride on her fancy FBI jet.” She moved to the edge of the bed, setting the bag down as she rummaged through it. “Cat is a bit pissed at me, but when I offered to write a full blown article about the steel mill explosion, along with one of my unpublished ones I never gave the times, but I’m now working remotely.” She pulled out a thick sweatshirt with a gaudy image of Big Ben on the front. “Your doctor pointed me in the direction of a few clothing shops up the street. I’ll have to go in the morning to at least buy some underwear.” She pulled out a small travel toothbrush kit. “She gave me the info for the apartment you rent when you’re in town, I figured I’d pay to have the place saved for us for the next few weeks. It was pretty embarrassing when I called the owner’s phone number and was directed to your assistant back in National City, Jess.” She cocked an eyebrow my way as she reached into the bag one last time, pulling out a small black stuffed cow wearing a doctors coat, holding a get well soon, sign. “The nice lady in the shop said this is a Kerry cow, from Ireland.” Kara set it next to my good left hand.

My fingers brushed the soft material. “You’re rambling, Kara.” I spoke softly, fighting a grin.

She sighed, closing her eyes as she fixed her glasses. “Okay. So, I’m staying here. With you. Dr. Cates told me you would need help moving around, since your right arm is pretty useless and will be until your weird nubis metal takes over. I don’t need to work in an office, I haven’t had an office for ten years and I find them useless and wasteful. Cat may be my boss, but I also know you’re the major stakeholder, so that makes you more my boss, and if I’m taking care of you, that counts as work related activities. I have money, a lot of it, so I can pay for things you need. I never needed money in the middle of the desert, or at all. I just buy really nice clothes that make me feel weird, and super uncomfortable shoes.” She glanced at her shoes, the laces untied and tucked into the side. She bit her bottom lip. “I’m really nervous, Lena.”

I blinked back the tears as I saw glimpses of my old Kara slip out and collide with the tough, hardened woman standing before me. “I own the apartment and rent it out when I’m not traveling. I have a warm library I use as an office, and you’re more than welcome to it. I’d prefer it if you kept me out of the steel mill story, or not write about it at all. It was a moment in time, nothing more.”

“I almost lost you, Lena. It’s more than nothing.” Kara spat the words out, frowning when she looked up and saw me flinch. “Um, sorry.” She ran her fingers along her forehead. “Kismet. You remember kismet?” She cleared her throat as she grabbed a chair and pulled it towards the bed.

“I do. I remember being swindled by that old woman, claiming she was a psychic, saying kismet would always bind us together.” I picked up the cow, pulling him close to my chest to pull some of the nervous energy away from my heart. “At the time, I felt it was fifty dollars lost to the wind and an old woman’s whiskey habit. But now.” I looked at Kara. “Kismet.”

She nodded, fidgeting with the gaudy sweatshirt. “I don’t know how to do this, how to let you in and find a new normal. But, I can’t stop running towards you. I can’t stop reading any article I can find about you, I can’t stop thinking about you, no matter how much it feels good, and how much it hurts.” She tucked her hand into a pocket. “I also booked a hotel room down the street from your apartment. I can come by and check on you.”

Her blue eyes searched mine, searching for something, something neither of us knew what she was looking for. But Kara was opening a door, and a way out. She was giving me a choice where I never gave her one. I also knew she was asking for permission. I squeezed the little cow, hoping my voice didn’t shake when I spoke. “Stay with me, please?” I watched her shoulder’s relax minutely. Her eyes brightening up, chasing away a piece of the heavy clouds I’d seen every day since our orbits collided in National City. “We can catch up, in between long naps.”

Kara bit back a grin, nodding. “I do love long naps, and it’s been a few years since I took one.” She took a deep breath, letting it out as she moved the chair closer to me. “Um, you should rest. Dr. Cates scheduled your surgery for first thing in the morning.”

I smiled, my heart pounding so hard, I thought my ribs would shatter. “Feel free to get yourself settled at the apartment. Shower, nap, and order something to eat. I have a standing account with every restaurant in the city.” I reached for the tablet, sending Kara the access code. “Type in the code and hit pound twice, the door will unlock and then lock behind you after twenty seconds. I’ll have Claire call you when I’m out of surgery. I can be discharged within the hour after.”

Kara’s phone dinged. She swiped it open, tapping my new message as she spoke. “I’ll figure out food, and might go grocery shopping. You’re probably still really bad about eating at home and keeping your shelves stocked.” She paused, glancing at me as she saw the code. “101610?”

“Yes. Just type that in and press pound twice.” I almost made a side comment about getting her head checked out, when it hit me. “Kara, I…”

She smiled, standing up and tucking the phone in her back pocket. “Every single password I’ve had for the last eleven years, 102488. I’m shocked I haven’t been hacked and my fortunes stolen.” She scooped up the sweatshirt, jamming it back in the bag before she looked at me again. “Tomorrow?”

I fought to hold in my tears. “Yes, tomorrow. Thank you, Kara.” I cleared my throat, my cheeks flushing with heat as she smiled and left the room.

The second I was alone, I covered my mouth, the tears running free.

10/16/2010 was the day I met Kara for the first time and fell in love.

10/24/1988 was my birthday, a day Kara declared the year we met, as a day she would never forget. It was the day her heart was born.

XXXX

Kara

Her apartment was bland, and I knew bland. Sleeping in sandy foxholes or barracks made out of rotting plywood and tarps, set me up to fully understand the definition of bland. But Lena’s apartment could put any hovel I slept in, to shame. It was nothing like her fancy penthouse in National City. At least there, there was life, art, books, and the newly worn spots in the floor where I knew she spent nights pacing as she tried solving the next world crisis.

This apartment, which she used more often than I expected when her doctor helped me get Lena inside after discharging her, just felt dead and cold. The small library held the only signs of life, and that was a cluttered desk full of papers, files, books, a whiteboard filled with her messy handwriting stood next to the window. Everywhere else I inspected was void of warmth, and it left me wondering a million things. One being how insane I was to stay with her.

I let out a slow breath, moving to the kitchen to put away the groceries I bought while Dr. Cates got Lena settled in her giant bed. I was thrown off by the way Dr. Cates stared at me with a knowing smile, sparking the jealousy hidden in the deep corners of my heart. Making me wonder if her and Lena had more than a patient doctor relationship. I huffed, shaking my head, and thought about something else, when an old memory of the days when Lena and I would bicker about how terrible my tiny queen sized bed in my apartment was. She didn't care that I lived in a crappy apartment in Brooklyn, she hated my bed. She complained she always felt cramped and trapped in it's small size, but never, ever let go of me when she stayed at my place. Curling into me like she was a koala bear, her head finding it's spot on my chest as she slept like a rock. It was also suspicious she hated my bed, but we spent more time in my apartment than her brownstone over on the better part of the city.

As I smiled through the memory, my heart skipped, my mind reaching down to smack it, screaming, this was crazy! It was crazy to stay with Lena, take care of her when we were still on shaky footing, but then again, I wasn’t known for solid sane choices. I had the stories and scars to prove it. I knew my heart was speaking for me as I operated on adrenaline in the hospital, desperately afraid to fly back to National City without her. I’d never admit that fact to Alex, even as she gave me the fourth degree about owning my feelings and finally talking to Lena. I scoffed, claiming Lena and I had talked, to which Alex slapped the back of my shoulder, telling me awkward outbursts and passing out wasn’t considered talking in polite societies.

We needed to talk. We had to talk. We couldn’t tip toe around the little snippets of our past we both held onto. I almost passed out when Lena rattled off her door code like it was a losing lottery number. Shoving another shard of my heart back together. My anger and fighting my heart was becoming more and more difficult. Last night, I sat in the middle of the guest bedroom, staring out the window as the sun set, rose, and set again, thinking about how close I came to losing the center of my world. Yes, she was a source of anger for many years, but since I saw her in the train station, and every time after that, I started to fight the anger.

Shutting the last cabinet door, I walked to the master bedroom. Dr. Cates mentioned Lena would be in and out as the anesthesia wore off, but to check on her and make sure she wasn’t moving her arm too much. Pushing the door open, I smiled at the sight of Lena sleeping like a fairytale princess. Laying in the middle of her giant bed, her arm propped up on a thick pillows. The only glaring difference was the wild bed head bun on the top of her head. My feeble attempt to keep her hair out of her face, knowing she hated when her hair touched her face when she didn’t feel well. Another far away memory that resurfaced with many others.

I walked over, gently sitting on the edge of the bed, pulling her blankets up to cover her. I reached towards her cheek brushing a few loose strands of hair back, when Lena stirred awake, scrunching up her face as her eyes flickered open.

“The bionic woman awakes.” I grinned, feeling my heart skip when those green eyes locked on mine.

“I feel floaty.” Lena blinked a few times, looking at her arm. “I can’t feel my arm.”

“That’s the drugs and the strange healing technology of your fancy metal. Apparently, it reacts to your nervous system, shutting down pain receptors if the metal notices you’re in great pain.” I covered her hand gently with mine, expecting it to be cold, only to find it very warm. “How are you feeling? Aside from floaty?”

Lena stared at me, her eyes were glossy from the pain killers, but the intensity was there. “You’re here.”

I nodded. “I am.” I went to move my hand, when Lena’s fingers brushed against mine, trying to her best to grab them. I gently picked her hand up, laying it in my palm, letting her squeeze my fingers.

“You made me so happy, Kara.” Her voice was raspy from the drugs, slow as she had to fight the haze to find her words. “For two years, you gave me the sun. Lillian, she hated seeing any of her children happy outside the cold world of being a Luthor. Especially the bastard daughter who defied her by merely existing.” Lena blinked heavily, sleep sneaking its way back in to claim her for a few more hours. “The week before, before I left, I announced to Lex and Lillian I was planning on leaving the family. Disowning myself from them.” She paused, looking at our hands. “Lillian threatened to ruin you as I packed my bags, stumbling across something I hid from her, but she found the receipts, and the box I hid in the floorboard. She lost her mind, and threatened to have you kicked out of school, banned from every decent college in the country. Then blackballed at every news publication, including the Midvale Gazette. She threatened to have Alex removed from the FBI academy, fabricating a criminal record your sister would never be able to disprove.”

I remained silent, my stomach twisting in knots as my anger reignited, but towards a different Luthor. “You should rest, Lena, we can talk later.”

She shook her head, closing her eyes. “I won’t have the courage later. I see what I’ve done to you, Kara. It’s time for answers.” She opened her eyes, tears streaming down her cheeks. “Lillian gave me an ultimatum, I could have you, but you’d have nothing you dreamed of. Your family would be ruined, and I couldn’t do that.” She looked at me. “I loved you so much, Kara. I didn’t know what I was doing when I left. I thought I was saving you. I wasn’t.” Her eyes fell to the weird pink patch of skin on my palm. “I chose fear over love.” She smiled weakly, pulling her hand away from mine. “I don’t deserve your forgiveness.” Her eyes drooped close, succumbing to the lingering drugs in her system.

I stared at her for a few minutes, clenching my jaw. I wanted to fly to Lillian’s prison, ask Alex to turn the cameras off, and put the woman through her paces. I’d always known it was Lillian who pushed us apart, but as I listened to Lena spill out the truth, it burned my soul. I was sure Lena left me because I didn’t fit the Luthor portrait. The middle class orphan who loved volunteering and could care less about elegance and money. It never occurred Lillian would blackmail her own child, holding the lives of me and my sister hostage. Making Lena choose and break her heart and mine.

“Fuck.” I stood, leaning over to kiss Lena on the forehead, mumbling against her skin. “You already had my forgiveness.” I leaned back, watching her sleep. “I love you, Lena. So much.”

I walked out of her room towards her library. I sat down, firing up my laptop I sent a message to Alex, asking her to find the prison Lillian was housed at. I then opened a new blank document and started writing, writing out the feelings of the last ten years and the last few weeks.

It was time I started telling my own truths.