“Keep Watching Me” — Keith Kogane
It was raining. Keith thought that was fitting, to be honest, when he woke up to the steady pitter-pattering on the roof. His limbs were sore, like he had stayed up too late in the training room instead of laughing himself to sleep beside his boyfriend. At least they hadn’t waited an extra day to get together. This would have been a terrible first month anniversary. Not a fairy tale story at all.
Keith groaned, dragging himself upright and sliding Lance gently down onto the bed. Lance was murmuring softly in his sleep, the faintest song on his lips, and Keith’s lips curled up in spite of himself. He reached out, brushing away the strands of hair blocking his boyfriend’s face from him, and cradled it dearly.
“Thanks, Lance.”
Keith pushed himself off the bed, and Lance’s hands slid after him, as if still searching for him. As if trying to bring him home.
Keith thumped down the stairs, rubbing over his index finger with his thumb, and Shiro caught him at the stairwell with a cup of coffee in his hand.
“Here,” said Shiro softly, placing a steadying hand on Keith’s shoulder and passing him the coffee. “Adam’s making breakfast, and Krolia’s picking up suits for everyone. She did a lot of research, I guess.”
Keith nodded mutely, blowing on the coffee as Shiro carefully guided him to the kitchen.
“Hey, Keith,” greeted Adam gently, sliding a plate of eggs and bacon in front of his usual chair, just enough that he might be able to stomach it maybe. “Pidge is already up;
she’s out front if you want to tell her that I’ve got her plate ready.”
He was already spooning out a larger helping onto the aforementioned plate, though his hazel eyes remained soft on Keith’s, grounding him in this moment. Keith just nodded, stealing Pidge’s cup of coffee on his way out.
“Oh. ‘Morning,” said Pidge, smiling up at Keith as she accepted the offered cup of coffee, the fingerless gloves sending a shot of warmth through Keith even when he felt so numb. “You doing okay?”
Keith shrugged, plopping down beside her as the sun crept over the horizon. The faint bumps of Shay leaping to the roof to watch the sunrise despite the rain sounded like they were coming to him from underwater. Like none of it was real, like it was just a movie going on around him, like he was nothing more than an observer. It didn’t feel like his life, somehow. It felt like a trick, a lie, a dream he had to wake up from eventually, and today was the day it would happen. Like he was still that little kid whose father had just died, who woke up screaming away the nightmares, who burned brighter than any fire so that no one could touch him. It felt like a fantasy he had made to get through it, that he was a Paladin of Voltron, that he mattered. He had found a family, one who loved him, who sat with him when they couldn’t do anything else. His mother loved him, he had a space sister, and they were coming together finally. Shiro and Adam were engaged again, and still had their arms open for him. He was out, and Mrs. Shirogane had been excited to meet Lance. He was in love, and an angel loved him back.
It was too good to be real.
“Not a talking kind of day?” Asked Pidge, her voice soft even though it still jarred Keith so much he nearly fell off the stoop.
Pidge just cackled like the little gremlin she was, taking a swig of coffee and sticking out her tongue at it.
“Ech, he never gets the sugar right,” she muttered, but she continued to drink it as the rain poured down. “You want a bit of quiet?”
Keith slid his finger along the rim of the cup, tilting his chin up and breathing in the sunset’s colors like they kept his heart beating. He loved quiet, had loved it since he was a kid, had loved the way it let his imagination draw out swooping stories, fantasies overflowing with stars, knights, lions, and just the barest sprinkle of love over all of it. It let him imagine the love he wanted, the one that was so perfect he knew it didn’t exist. He could abandon twisted reality for fiction in quiet. He could escape to a fairy tale in quiet.
But silence was different. Silence drowned out everything else with screams, with memories, with everything he had ever said or done wrong, with all the things he wished had never happened. Everything that made him lose faith in himself.
Keith shook his head, and Pidge hummed softly.
“Okay, well, these gloves are freaking awesome,” she started, a grin spreading over her cheeks and curling into her eyes as Keith scooted closer and sipped his coffee. “They made the mission so much easier! I mean, typing with gloves is a menace, but you should have seen some of these guys’ faces when I finished hacking their systems! They just stared at the computer like a ghost had infected their ship, it was hilarious! Ahhh, it was actually crazy fun being up there. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it was freaky being on Haggar’s ship and all, but,” she added, fingers tightening around the cup as she looked up at where the last of the stars were being eclipsed by the sun, hunger burning deep in her irises, “I felt like I belonged again. I was doing something that mattered, that no one else could do. So…so I finally get why you left for the Blade of Marmora. But I’m really glad you came back, because Voltron isn’t home without all of us.”
I know, Keith wanted to say as he sipped his coffee, I know because it wasn’t home without you or Allura or Matt or Coran. Voltron is our home; all of ours.
“Still, I missed you guys up there,” admitted Pidge, smirking. “I even missed your stupid pining and Lance’s flirting. I missed you guys……Thanks for being here when I came back.”
Keith smiled, wrapping an arm around Pidge and ruffling her hair from the back. Pidge shrieked, batting at his hands like a cat, and Black let out an amused rumble in the back of Keith’s mind, like a balm settling over his scars. And, as Lance trundled out to join them, Hunk’s heavy steps only a touch behind Allura’s sweeping taps, Keith grinned at his little space sister. After all, she had understood him without words once, she could do it again. Plus, the message was loud and clear. We missed you too.
It was in the way Lance squished between her and Keith, throwing an arm around both of them before he pressed the gentlest good morning kiss to Keith’s cheek. It was in Hunk juggling everyone’s plates outside, looking like the proudest waiter on the planet, and Allura’s swapping of Pidge’s coffee for her own, substantially sweeter one, before plopping down on Keith’s other side and promptly falling asleep on his shoulder. Lance chuckled, holding his family close with a sunshine smile, and Hunk trapped Pidge in a squawking bear hug because Hu-nk, ca-can’t b-breathe!
And Keith just smiled, sipping on his coffee as the rest of his family filtered out to join them. Somewhere along the line, this had become his favorite kind of quiet.
Keith straightened his suit, black dress shirt under the matching jacket, and fingerless gloves blending in. His hair fell down to his shoulders, brush discarded on the nearest table, and a soft knock sounded at the door. It sounded kind of like Lance’s, but only when Lance was so sleep-deprived he was tripping over his own feet, and Keith had made sure they got home with plenty of time to watch the movie together last night. Still, Keith knew he hadn’t slept well last night. Maybe Lance hadn’t either.
Keith stepped over, opening the door with a nearly silent click and nearly jumping out of his skin when Mrs. McClain smiled at him from the other side.
“Hola, querido,” she said gently, tilting her head with that smile that Lance always wore after a hey, man. “Shiro told me that you were having difficulty with your hair. Do not worry, I have tamed many a mane,” she teased, taking his hand and guiding him over to the mirror again, sweeping the brush into her hand and tapping the door shut, “and I know plenty about yours from my son. He has always been so particular about hair.”
Keith bit his lip, eyes flitting anywhere other than hers in the mirror, but Mrs. McClain didn’t so much as blink at the lack of response as she began to brush out his tangles. “Did you know that he cried when he came to America about the change in brands? He was so upset.”
She chuckled, shaking her head. “Though I doubt that was all that hurt. But, still, it was quite cute. He has always been so good to others, I tried to train him into also being good to himself, but I think he just did it so I wouldn’t get upset,” she admitted, shaking her head before brightening up, flipping up his hair and tackling the underside, “but that seems to have changed for the better! He may still insist upon working himself into the ground, but now…now he has a bed on that ground that he can rest on. You have all given my son so much,” she continued, her eyes catching the light of the room as she brushed in his sides too, “and you have especially. You should hear Lance talk about you sometime, it is truly heartwarming how much that boy loves you.”
Keith ducked his chin, trying to hide the strawberries on his cheeks, but Mrs. McClain tsked behind him. “Querido, I’ll need you to raise your chin so that I can brush out the top; you are far taller than me,” she coaxed, and Keith licked his desert lips for a tick before glancing up again. “Much better, thank you, querido. Now, where was I?” She murmured to herself, running her fingers through his hair and tucking it back as she filled the room with a steady, warm stream of chatter. “Oh yes, don’t worry, he has nothing but praise for you. From what I have gathered, you have a reckless streak, but a kind heart. You are not good with words, but you try harder than anyone else to get them right. You are brave and true to your word,” she continued, and Keith’s throat closed up as tears pricked at his eyes, his fingers clenching into trembling fists because she was definitely Lance’s mom, only the McClains could ever make him feel like this, “and you love this world even if you wish you didn’t at times. You have a remarkable capacity for love, mijo. You remind me of Lance in that way.”
She snapped a hair tie around the high, poofy ponytail, and placed her hands on her hips with a little toss of the head that perfectly mirrored her son’s. Keith smiled, a single tear racing down his cheek, and his heartbeat seeming to catch up to the present for a second. Just for that moment, he felt like he was here, not trapped in that desert shack, waiting for his dad to come back home. Just for that tick, he felt a Paladin of Voltron, like one of two Black Paladins, like Lance’s boyfriend, like Pidge, Hunk, Matt, and Allura’s brother, like Shiro and Adam’s annoying little bro, like Coran’s nephew, Krolia’s son, and Acxa’s space brother, like part of a constantly growing family. He felt like he belonged.
“Hey, Keith,” called Lance, pushing open the door and grinning when he saw his mom already there. “Oh! ¡Hola, Mami! ¿Cómo estás?”
“Bien, ¿y tú, mijo?”
“Bien, gracias. Have you left Keith with enough hearing for me to throw bad puns at him, or do I need to find some ears of corn to replace his?”
Keith rolled his eyes, but Mrs. McClain tapped her chin slowly, and Lance shifted his weight, watching her with that tilt to his lips that always warmed Keith’s heart. Mrs. McClain hummed, switching to tapping her cheek, and Lance continued to smile at her, hands hidden behind his back as he waited.
“Oh! I’ve got it! Ears are a measurement of corn! Oh, but I thought stalks were?”
“Stalks have multiple ears of corn on them; what we eat are considered the ears,” explained Lance, stashing something in his belt and then opening his arms for a hug. “¡Así se hace, Mami!”
Mrs. McClain chuckled, pulling Lance into her arms and planting kisses on each of his cheeks. “Gracias, Leandro.”
Leandro?!
“De nada, Mami. Now, I’ve got to finish getting Keith ready. Te quiero, Mami.”
“Te quiero, Lance.”
Mrs. McClain crushed Keith in a quick hug before bustling from the room, closing the door nearly silently on her way out. Lance’s eyes lingered on where she had been, the soft smile on his lips turning bright when he looked over at Keith.
“Now, mister,” he teased, holding up a red tie and flashing Keith a sunflower grin, “let’s get you looking like a gentleman!”
Well, let’s turned out to be a figure of speech, because Lance did everything. He grabbed gold cufflinks and snapped them through Keith’s sleeves (“Yeah, it seems like Rachel is looking forward to Lotor coming back, apparently he has a nice sense of fashion too”), folded down his collar (“Did you know that Pidge hacked some of Haggar’s droids to do the chicken dance?), and pulled the tie just tight enough that he wasn’t choking Keith (“Turns out Iverson’s office got covered in post-it notes by someone; and I thought I was the master prankster!”) before he slid chapstick over Keith’s cracked lips through a gentle kiss.
“Stay with me, okay, Samurai?” He murmured, dropping an extra kiss to Keith’s lasilh. “Stay right here with us.”
Keith swallowed, clasping Lance’s hand, and nodded. Lance gave him one of those smiles that made his heart ache, and pressed his lips to Keith’s forehead. “You ready to go?”
Never. I’ll never be ready.
Keith nodded.
Lance scooped Keith up into his arms, a grin bouncing across his lips, and smooched his frozen boyfriend’s forehead in response.
“Then let’s get this show on the road, partner.”
If Keith had been numb and floating away all day, the moment he set foot on the graveyard, the earth grabbed him and slammed him back down to his father’s death. Ten years wasn’t long enough to take away the dust in his throat as he ran out to scream for his father, it wasn’t enough for him to forget the cold that pierced his marrow, it wasn’t long enough to take away the feel of his father’s hand on his shoulder the last time he left, promising to come back and stick stars all over Keith as well as his collage. He had left his gloves with Keith, insisting that he got new ones and, even though they never truly fit until this year, Keith had never taken them off.
He had never taken his father out of his life.
“Keith,” reminded Shiro softly, one hand falling on his shoulder as Adam took the other side, his darker hand just as warm. “We’ve got you.”
Keith blew out a slow breath, any words he could muster dying before they made it to his lips, but Lance still smiled softly at him as he adjusted a bouquet of irises. Keith’s dad’s favorite flower.
Krolia’s hand slid onto Keith’s back between his shoulder blades, and he twisted to look up at her. She had ditched the Blade uniform for a black evening gown with off-shoulder sleeves and a slightly flared skirt; Keith’s dad had saved it away for when she came back. Keith wished she had gotten the chance to dance with him in it. Her eyes were glazed, her lip trembling and a thin veil of tears spreading over her irises as she looked towards Tex’s grave. Keith reached out on instinct, snagging Krolia’s free hand and squeezing it tightly. He knew that pain. He knew that pain all too well.
Because, the Lance that was unloading everyone’s bouquets, who giggled at a joke when he passed Allura her amaryllises, who poked Pidge’s forehead as he handed over her tulips, who embraced Hunk before giving him his poppies, who finger gunned at Coran before passing over his daffodils, who threw smiles at Keith whenever he got the chance, that was the same Lance that the crypods had memorized. It was the same Lance who had nearly died so many times.
And Keith knew, painfully well, that he could easily have been in Krolia’s position a thousand times over by now. He still could before this war was over.
“Let us go,” murmured Krolia, the cracks spreading through her voice like an earthquake, “I have missed him.”
Shiro and Adam glanced at Keith. Hunk trotted over, Pidge hot on his heels, and Allura swept to his side just a tick before Coran. He couldn’t help a small smile at each of them. Hunk with his golden pocket square and Pidge with her green bow tie, Allura with a pink lining to her black gown, and Coran with an orange dress shirt underneath the black jacket. Shiro had blue gloves on, Adam had a bronze watch, and Lance had a glowing smile on in addition to the matching necklace still bouncing against his shirt and Keith’s hand tight in his.
None of them were going to leave him in pure blackness after all.
So Keith took a deep breath, squeezed Krolia and Lance’s hands, smiled gratefully to Shiro and Adam, and blew out a painful huff. It had nothing on the wind that carried away Keith’s tears that night.
He stepped towards the grave, and his family followed. Keith had almost never been to the grave after the funeral; it hurt too much to come back, especially since all he could do was cry in front of it. He had never once been able to utter the words I’m okay or don’t worry about me without dissolving into tears. No way his dad wanted to see that. But this…this, Keith wanted him to see.
Keith wanted his dad to see his wife, his half-daughter, and his son kneeling in front of his grave to clean it together, regardless of the rain. He wanted his dad to see Lance light the incense, protecting it with his hands as the soft murmur of alabanza a don Tex nearly sent Keith into a flurry of tears. And, more than anything, he wanted his dad to see Allura place her amaryllises on his grave and kneel to speak.
“I wish I could have had the honor of knowing you,” she said, her eyes glittering a little from the rain. “Because then I wouldn’t need to tell you how amazing your son is. Keith is not only our leader, he is our friend, he is our family, and he is in all of our hearts. I know you would be proud of him. We certainly are.”
She smiled at Keith, taking his hand and squeezing it softly. “Thank you for giving us such an incredible brother.”
Keith choked on his words, tears spilling down his cheeks, and Allura rose to wipe them gently with the heel of her palm, understanding soft in her touch. “We couldn’t have asked for anything more.”
Hunk set his poppies down, placing a hand on the grave and lowering his head in respect.
“Your son is not just a hero, sir, he’s also our hero. He comes back to us every day, no matter how hard the battle, with his head held high. He taught me how to do that without even knowing it. No matter how dire the situation, he never gave up and he never backed down. Everything that he is, he has made himself into.”
Hunk grinned up at Keith. “And he made himself into a great friend and brother.”
Keith ran out of vision partway through Hunk’s words and, by the time he was crushed by one of Hunk’s patented hugs, all he could do was sob and cling to his brother. “You’ve done a good job, bud.”
Pidge sneaked past, crouching to lay her tulips down before glancing up at the grave.
“Uh hi,” she managed, red stealthing its way into her cheeks. “I’m Pidge. Keith is kind of like an older brother to me and, um……” She swallowed, sighing, and turned to crook up a smile at Keith. “He knows I’m bad at this, but he doesn’t use that as an excuse to write me off. He never gave up on trying to understand me and all my technical gibberish, and he’s always been there for me when I need him. So…thanks. If it weren’t for you, I never would have met Keith, and that would really, really hurt. I don’t like the idea of a life without Keith. None of us do.”
Pidge popped up to latch onto Keith, her face buried in his stomach as if promising him she couldn’t see his tears even if he could hear her muffled words. “He’s our brother and we would rewrite the universe to make him happy.”
Keith could feel again. The numbness seeped away, crushed out of him with every hug and kind word, every promise that he was loved, that he had a family here, that his father had so much to be proud of him for, every pair of beautiful, perfect eyes turning to him with unmistakable trust and care. It was everything he had never imagined he would get, and yet…here it was, trapping him in hugs and wiping away his tears.
It didn’t matter, he couldn’t see anything with his glasses drenched by the rain. He didn’t need to, though. He knew his family better than he knew his own heart.
He knew that Matt would set the peonies down with the softest touch, and that he would trace Tex’s name on the gravestone because it was the greatest mark of respect at a Rebellion funeral. It was a salute to a hero.
“You dedicated your life to saving people, to protecting them,” said Matt, bowing his head slightly, “and you have, more than you know. That legacy is one that Keith carries with him. Someday, you know, you’ll get to look down and say that your son is one of the Paladins of Voltron, Defenders of the Universe, and Saviors of All Realities. But, even more than that, one day, you’ll get to look down and say that your son is happy. We’ll make sure of it.”
He stood up, embracing Keith tightly, and pulling back to squeeze his shoulders. “I’m proud to call him my friend, and I look forward to calling him my brother.”
I look forward to it too, Matt.
“He is one of the finest paladins I have ever had the honor to meet,” said Coran, settling the daffodils with a slight fluff. “And I am proud to call myself his family. He is like a nephew to me, and I cherish every tick I get with him. I hope you’re watching from above, if you humans can, because there is so much that he has done that I can’t even begin to explain, and I certainly can’t explain how proud I am of him. Not just as a paladin, but as a person. He has come so far, and he will go even further, I am sure of it.”
Keith practically fell into his arms, sobs wracking his shoulders. I’ll go there because you have my back, Coran.
Acxa lay down a bouquet of roses, settling her hands together in prayer, and bowing her head.
“I wish I could have gotten the chance to meet you,” she said simply. “I can tell just by looking at Keith that you were an amazing father.”
At that, Keith’s knees gave way, and if it weren’t for Shiro and Adam’s dives, he would have sunk to the ground in a lump of tears. He dropped his face into his hands, sobs tearing through his lungs, and Shiro tucked him into his chest with a soft shhhhhh. Adam carded his hands through Keith’s hair, and Keith nearly choked on tears when Krolia squeezed his shoulder, concern ricocheting through her eyes. No one had ever said that. Teachers, students, people on the streets, friends, foster families, all of their comments about Keith’s dad were that he must have raised you in a dump or must not have taught you what was right or wrong or never was around or didn’t love you or would be ashamed of you because Keith wasn’t enough, wasn’t good enough, was never enough, could never compare to his dad—
“Hey, man,” called Lance, somehow slipping into the pile of paladins surrounding Keith to cup his cheek. “Hey, stay with me. Remember? Stay with me. We’ve got you. We’re not going to leave you alone.”
Adam bit his lip, then loosened his tie and stood up.
“Keith,” he whispered. “You’re going to want to keep your eyes open for this.”
And, as Keith raised his head, Adam knelt in front of Tex’s grave and pulled down his collar just enough to reveal a new pendant on the necklace that had once held his engagement ring.
“Your son isn’t alone,” he promised, removing the necklace and popping open the pendant as if Keith’s dad could see him through the grave. “He will always have the chance to be someone’s son, to be our son, to be our little brother and our family. Keith loves you and, when he loves, he loves deeply. So I’m not going to say he’ll ‘get over’ your death because no one just ‘gets over’ losing their father,” he said, his voice cracking a touch on that part, “but I can promise you that we’ll be there with him, that we’ll make sure that the life he has to live with your death also has beautiful things in it. We’ll be sure he still has a family, no matter where he goes. Keith will always have a home to come back to.”
Adam stood, stepping back over to Keith’s side, and slid the necklace just below his tie, the pendant still popped open to reveal a family photo of Shiro and Adam with Keith between them, arms around each other, that they had taken decaphoebs ago to celebrate his promotion to fighter pilot. Keith let out a watery laugh, and Adam knelt beside his little brother to take him into his arms. He smiled at his fiance and nodded his head towards the grave. This wasn’t only for Keith’s dad, this was also for Keith. He deserved to, for once, be told exactly how much he meant to all of them. They could show it forever, and they would, but being family meant taking it the extra mile. After all, Keith knew they were family, but now it was time to show him exactly what kind of family they were.
Shiro knelt in front of Tex’s grave, setting his carnations atop the grave before placing a hand over his heart, fingers grazing the vest Keith had given him so long ago. He bent his head, his eyes catching raindrops, and smiled softly.
“You must have meant the world to him,” he murmured. “I’ve heard so many stories about you. Keith has spent his whole life protecting the name you gave him, carrying on the Kogane family name and shielding it no matter the cost. And I can easily say he’s more than succeeded. I think I speak for all of us when I say that, after all this time, it feels like there’s a small piece of Kogane in me. Everything that your name stood for, he has passed on. Keith is brave and kind, he’s resourceful, but is learning to rely on others, and he’s the greatest brother I could ever ask for. No matter how many times he’s had to save me, he’s risen to the challenge, and I can only promise to always be there for him. I’m never giving up on him, none of us are, and,” he added, smiling over at Keith’s mood-wide violet eyes, slowly drying, “neither is he. Never again.”
Keith hiccuped, lurching to his feet and reaching out for Shiro just a tick before getting swept into a hug by his brother. Shiro cradled Keith’s head close to his chest, and Keith buried his streaming eyes in his brother’s suit as Shiro soothed him softly. Pidge elbowed Lance, whose blue eyes were trapped on his sobbing boyfriend.
“Go on, you need to pay your respects,” she reminded him, but Lance only bit his lip and glanced back at Keith. “Hey, it’s okay. He’ll be okay. Keith’s tougher than he looks right now.”
Lance chuckled, the sound fracturing in his throat, but Pidge just punched his shoulder and raised her fist towards him challengingly. “Trust in him. Now go, he would want his dad to meet his future husband.”
Lance’s cheeks blazed more than the Red Lion, and Pidge snickered as he leapt to his feet with the faintest of hisses.
“I’m going to put marshmallows in your hot chocolate for a week.”
“I’ll throw them at your head.”
“Gremlin.”
“Ogre.”
Lance stuck out his tongue at her, and Pidge pulled down her eyelid before shooing him off towards the grave. He spun the thin bouquet of irises between his fingers for a tick before raising his chin and striding over to Tex’s grave. Keith blinked at his boyfriend as Lance sank to his knees in front of his dad’s grave, mud seeping into his pants, and a memory flooded his brain. One they had shared. Lance screaming and pounding the help button at a hospital as he clutched his father’s hand, tears pooling in his eyes as he begged his dad to hold on, to wait because he was going to go to the Garrison, he was going to get married and have kids, he was going to make him proud—then it always switched to black suits and Lance’s mother crying—to Veronica hugging Lance as tears streamed silently down his face—
“La—”
“I really hope you’re watching from up there,” said Lance, all smiles washed away in the rain, “because Keith isn’t done. He’s going to keep moving forward, doing incredible things and saving people, making a life so crazy that our kids will think he’s joking. He’s just going to keep going, he’s never going to give up because that’s who Keith is. He doesn’t do anything by halves,” started Lance, the faintest hitch in his voice as he turned to lock cerulean eyes with Keith, tears gathering at the edges of them even as he finally showed off that sunshine smile during a storm. “He throws his all into everything, he always has, and he never gives up once he decides to do something. He’s talented but doesn’t take it for granted, he’s kind but not stupid about it, and he’s one of the most loyal people I know.”
Lance smiled, shoving himself to his feet just in time to catch Keith’s tackle hug and murmur the last words into Keith’s ear. “He has an amazing capacity for love. The most amazing capacity I’ve ever seen. And I’m grateful every day that you chose to share that love with me.”
Keith clung to Lance, tears drowning anything he could hope to say in response, but Lance just pulled him into his arms again. “Come on, Samurai. Let’s give you a chance to breathe, okay?”
Keith jerked his head in the closest thing to a nod he could manage, and Lance bent down to snag the lapel of his suit in his teeth and pull it out just enough that his boyfriend could snuggle under the makeshift umbrella. “Come on, Prince Charming, I’ve got you.”
Lance passed Krolia as he carried Keith back to Shiro and Adam, his eyes darting up to lock with her violet ones.
“We’ve got you too,” he swore. “Adam lost Shiro too, albeit temporarily. You’re not alone with us.”
Krolia’s concrete jawline softened just a touch, her eyebrows creeping up along with the edge of her lips.
“Thank you, Lance.”
Lance just smiled as he strode back to the cluster of his family alongside the graves, their arms already open and waiting. Keith slid out of Lance’s grasp though, feet splashing to the ground and hand finding Lance’s.
Krolia crouched in front of Tex’s grave, a half-smile on her face even as her tears mingled with the rain.
“Long time no see,” she said softly, shaking her head with a bell laugh dying in the air. “I’m back. Keith’s doing great, and I found Acxa. The war’s nearly over. It’s nearly over…” she repeated, voice cracking as if someone had shot her and the faint giggle that followed sounded like her heart had been ripped out. “It’s nearly over, but after all this time, I still don’t have you. I guess you weren’t mine to have, then. You were Keith’s, though. So, thank you for staying with him. I see so much of you in him,” she added, turning streaming eyes on her son as her lips curled into a sweet, proud smile. “I see everything good about you in him. He has my temper though, sorry about that.”
Keith let out a watery chuckle, and Lance wiped away his tears as Krolia continued. “Remember what I told you when I left? We gave me that haircut right before takeoff, and I promised I would grow out just a little bit, just enough for you to braid when I got back? I promised you that, no matter what, I wouldn’t cut it so that, when I came back, I could give it to you. It would be the rope binding us together until our hands could again.”
Lance reached for his jacket pocket without thinking about it. Krolia just shook her head, tears leaking from under her lids as she trembled. Then, quick as lightning, she snatched her blade from her pocket, extending it into a sword and pulling the ponytail taut. Eyes glinting a sharp yellow in the rain, mouth locked in a firm line, and the ghost of her husband’s touch on her hand, Krolia slashed off the hair she had grown so long for the man she would always love. Strands danced in the rain, like the traces of love she had watched flit through her fingers so long ago, and vanished away on the wind.
Krolia twirled the sword back into a knife, shoving it into her pocket. And, the faint warmth of her Tex’s hands on her own for the final time, she laid her ponytail at the grave alongside the garden of flowers.
And, tears still cascading down her cheeks, she smiled like the sun was about to come up, and let her fingers trail over his name. “Here’s your end of the rope, Tex. I’ll grow out another one over here and, someday, we’ll tie them together again. I’ll see you on the other side. Until then, I’ll stay with our son and daughter. That way, when I come to see you, I’ll get to tell you exactly how incredible they turned out to be. I already have so many stories.”
Keith sucked in an unsteady breath as he joined Krolia in front of the grave, kneeling to smile at his dad. Krolia patted his shoulder, pulling him in just enough to kiss the top of his head before stepping away. She was greeted with a hug from Adam and a gentle hand on her shoulder from Shiro that she sank into gratefully. They had spent phoebs floating through space together, after all. She trusted them just as much as they trusted her.
Keith swallowed quietly as he looked at the flowers piled in front of his father’s grave, at all of the words singing around it, and all the touches his family had left behind. He could feel their love in the very air around the grave, flowing around him and tugging at the words that had been lodged in his throat all quintant until they finally tumbled out.
“I love you,” whispered Keith, smile breaking free across his lips as he wiped the final traces of his tears dry. “I love you so much, and I’ll always miss you. But just…keep watching me, okay? I’ve still got a lot I want to show you. After all,” he added, turning to the family that stood waiting for him in a drenched graveyard during the middle of a war, eyes overflowing with love and arms always open with trust and compassion, “this is just our beginning. And I’d love to take you along for the ride. Because everyone here is everything they’ve said today about me and more.”
Maybe Zarkon would attack tomorrow. Maybe they would all be blown up and die, maybe the public relations event in a few days would go badly, maybe things wouldn’t be perfect. But this here? Right now? Keith blew out a soft breath and looked up to the sky. “Keep watching me; I’ve finally got a life I really want you to see, okay?”
And if he felt the fleeting warmth of a hand on his back, he was sure it was only his imagination. Or Black.
“Who wants to get lunch?” Managed Keith, smiling over at his family.
“CUDDLE PILE!”
“Wait, Hunk, it’s raini—”
“TACKLE HUG!”
“Lance!”
“SNUGGLESSSS!”
Keith burst out laughing, crushed under the weight of his family’s love, and the laughter spread through the little heap until, in the middle of a rainstorm, a little patch of sunshine glowed over a grave. And, overhead, Keith swore he caught sight of his favorite star smiling down on him. He slid his fingers into Lance’s.
“Yeah,” he breathed. “Keep watching, Dad. I want you to see me happy.”