“I Will Never Yield an Inch to the Likes of You!” — Pidge Holt
Pidge whooped, fists pumping into the air as the laptop flashed green at her, the rest of the computers going black. She twisted, yanking her computer into her bag, and Matt threw down his hand from above. He pulled her back up into the vents, and Rover beeped a sleepy hello human at her.
“Alright!” Cheered Pidge quietly. “Their systems should be down for a good half varga, including hand sensors! Come on, let’s see how much of the ship we can blaze through!”
Matt’s wicked grin answered her question, their high-five like a shot of electricity through the shaft, and another gear slid back into place in Pidge’s stomach. She whipped out her remaining flash drives, trapping each between her fingers like additional claws, and tipped her glasses to catch the light like in those animes Keith loved.
“We’re going to destroy them!” She declared, manic cackles running through her words, and Matt smirked triumphantly.
Ever since Pidge had emptied an entire bottle of hand sanitizer into Haggar’s shampoo, she had been in a remarkably good mood, and Matt’s latest “upgrade” to the Galran systems had finally given them full control over the ship. And, as tempted as Matt was to just blow all the ships around them out of the sky, the survival rate of that was a solid zero percent. Plus, Pidge was having a lot more fun with this.
“Alright, oh mighty paladin,” teased Matt, bowing and waving a hand down the vent, “do lead the way for this humble peasant.”
Pidge snickered, shoving his shoulder and leaping down the air duct in a smooth slide that drew a smile on her brother’s lips. Pidge had already moved nearly silently due to her multiple infiltrations of Galran ships, but this was a whole other level. She could pass for a shadow these days. Matt threw himself down the duct after her, Rover’s faint hum following them, and one hand already on his weapon. This was their largest operation, and very possibly their last one. One last-ditch effort to find that comet.
Pidge leapt out of the duct, rolling out to carry her momentum right into her headlong dash down the corridors, a familiar smirk settling over her lips. Her bayard practically pulsed in her palm, blood searing through her veins, and breaths sprinting throughout her body. It was just like old times again, finally. No more sneaking around, no more dodging into air ducts, no more hiding. This time, she would tear her way through whatever stood in front of her until that weapon was in front of her, until she could disable it or gather data, until she could go home with her head held high.
Finally, finally, it was time to fight.
A sentry pointed to the right as she dashed past, and Pidge threw back her head with a shrieking laugh. Matt’s latest modification to the code? Well, after that one mishap with a sentry that Rover definitely hadn’t electrocuted, someone had decided to make a new code for the robots and well……nothing technological was safe from the Holt siblings. It only took a few hacks to insert a line of code that would react to the ship’s system going offline by helping the short, strange-looking mechanics towards the greatest power signature on the ship: the comet. Cloaked by Haggar’s magic or not, the sentries knew where the witch went constantly due to their rounds, and were more than happy to tell the bespectacled mechanic where their leader frequented if she thought it would help. And Pidge most certainly did.
Matt cackled triumphantly, sprinting alongside his little sister and sharing another high-five as Rover began to collect data from the droids around them.
“Meet us at Green in twenty dobashes!” Called Pidge, saluting the little robot even as her heart lurched.
She didn’t want to lose Rover II like she had lost her first one. But, if they didn’t get this data, the chances they would be able to go back into hiding were…small, to say the least. They had one shot at this, so they really needed to make it count.
Matt’s gaze strayed over to Pidge, the searing light flaring into her amber eyes that he had become so familiar with, and his nails bit into his palm. He had never seen that look on her face when they were back on Earth.
“Hey, Pidge?” He began as another sentry gestured down a strangely zig-zagging corridor.
Pidge tore down the hallway, spinning to grin at her brother and quirking an eyebrow just like Lance used to.
“Yeah, peasant?” She teased, hood blowing off her hair and light catching in her eyes and filling them with a divine shimmer. “What’s up? You want to harvest the comet’s data this time?”
Matt’s words lodged in his throat, choking all the air out of his lungs, and burning at his eyes.
You look so happy here.
The way she moved, the way she spoke, the way she wore those glasses and hoodie and gloves like she was born to become a paladin.
You look so free up here.
The way she had clenched her fists under the table when their mom barely blinked at Pidge’s accomplishments, talking more about the latest code experiments in her company, the way her shoulders fell when her mother criticized her judgement and insisted that she needed to be more cautious.
You look like yourself when you’re in space.
The way she had drawn herself up and argued that being cautious wasn’t who she was, the way their mom had insisted it had always been who Katie was, that this was the smartest way for her to live.
You look like you’re meant to be here.
The way Pidge had jumped at the opportunity to leave again, the only hesitation latching onto her when her eyes flickered over to her space family.
You look like you could fly away at a moment’s notice.
At least Matt was part of that family.
…Is it selfish to ask you to come back with me?
……But their parents were not.
Can I even call Earth your home anymore?
Can we still be your family?
“Are you okay? Will…will you be okay back on Earth?”
The words spilled out of Matt’s lips, headbutting their way to the front of the line, and flinging themselves into the air just like how Pidge flung herself down the corridor: with an impulsive desire to help, to protect, to love that was always there if you looked closely enough. And Pidge never left a stone unturned when it came to her family.
Her fingers went taut, words clogging up her throat, and her heels dug into the ground. She bit her lip, her mother’s words echoing in her head during the dinner discussions, reprimands of “you shouldn’t talk like that, you’re going too fast” or “Katie, please lower your voice, the neighbors don’t need to hear about your code” and “I don’t think you’re going to be able to finish that before you have to leave again” still scraping at her ear. Pidge rubbed a thumb over her bayard. She wasn’t the daughter her mother remembered. Katie had been quiet, polite, had learned from school that people didn’t want to hear about her ideas, from dinner conversations that the words of her family held more weight than her own, that it was her job to make sure that everyone had a voice even if it meant sacrificing her own. But the tick Pidge had been launched into space, she dropped all of that. Now, she raised her chin high and talked too loudly, too quickly, she didn’t explain that one step sufficiently for them because her family had always trusted her whether they understood or not.
Because Pidge had changed. She learned about sunsets from Lance, about hoverbike races from Keith, about cooking from Hunk, dancing from Allura, alien quests from Coran, stupid music from Adam, and teamwork from Shiro. And she hadn’t learned that by sitting still and listening; she had learned that by questioning, by arguing, by cackling at Adam’s high-pitched rendition of Coldplay, by taking Allura’s hands and stepping all over her feet, by teasing Coran for his obvious exaggerations, and by challenging Keith to help her find Mothman on his death bike. She had found these things out by jumping on Shiro’s back and teasing him for sounding like an old man, by printing off pictures of sunsets to share with Lance, and by spilling blue, sticky flour all over Hunk’s head when trying to make Shiro a birthday cake. Pidge hadn’t learned because she sat there and took in the knowledge; she learned because she wanted to get closer to the ones she loved. Because she wanted to grow with them.
But if they hadn’t wanted to grow with her, it never would have worked. Hunk would have yelled her out of the kitchen for the mess instead of laughing hysterically when she snapped a picture, Keith would have told her off for being rude about his bike instead of hypothesizing with her for vargas about where to look first, and Adam would have been offended by her cackling instead of pitching it higher until she was shrieking with laughter. Shiro would have warned her that she was too big for piggyback rides instead of sprinting around the castle with her at top speed, Coran would have told her to listen quietly instead of repeating it with more extreme emphasis, Allura would have told her to watch until she could do it instead of putting them both in socks while teaching Pidge to twirl, and Lance would have been haughty that she hadn’t listened in the first place instead of finding the best ways to hang the photos up in their rooms. Pidge hadn’t spent this time growing alone; she had grown with her space family the entire time. They had given her space to mess up, apologize, fix her mistakes, make new ones, pick herself up, and laugh about them. They had celebrated her successes with her, held her when she cried over her failures, and dragged her kicking and screaming out of her room when she needed a break. Heck, Lance had thrown her into the pool at one point and absolutely destroyed her in an all-out water war to keep her away from the computer for a varga.
No matter how hard she had been, her family had never once walked out on her. They had never given up or surrendered, and neither had she. No matter how far back they pulled, no matter how much they wanted to leave, Pidge would never walk out on them. They had been there for her through the best and worst of her life, and nothing in the universe would ever bring her to leave them behind. She would hold Hunk when he cried, antagonize Keith when he needed a good sparring session, relive memories with Lance when he was homesick, and make Adam chai just how he liked it when the man worked himself into the ground. She would hack Shiro’s room to smell like lavender when he was having a bad day, braid Allura’s hair when she needed to be reminded that they were a family, and play hide-and-seek in the vents with Coran, leaving trails of laughter for him to follow because he wasn’t left without anyone to play with. They were a family. She had their backs, and they had hers beyond time and space.
But when she looked at her family on Earth, all she could do was sigh and brace herself. She loved them, loved them with all her heart no matter what, and she would tear the universe to shreds to find them. But that didn’t mean that they were what she needed. And quiznak did it hurt to admit that when she looked at Matt, at his already teary amber eyes, at the way his hands trembled. But she was done with governing her emotions with their logic, she had to use her own. Her happiness wasn’t found by playing it safe; it was found by recklessly abandoning everything she could have for a chance at true joy. Pidge was done settling. Katie may have sat back as her wants, her needs, her everything was swept to the side in her mother’s attempt to bring their family back to the “normal” they had all moved past, but Pidge wouldn’t. That wasn’t the normal she dreamed of.
Matt knew that, Pidge was sure of it. Even if he didn’t know what she had dreamed of, he knew what she hadn’t dreamed of. She hadn’t dreamed of dresses, of polite conversations, of making arguments with substantial evidence and receiving “well, I don’t think so” as a response like that somehow stood up to all the logic she had presented them with. She hadn’t dreamed of being dismissed as inexperienced despite her time in an intergalactic war. And, this time, she didn’t feel somehow wrong for looking at those she loved and screaming her truth at the top of her lungs. She didn’t feel bad about demanding space to take up, about being her reckless, goofy, brash, kind, smart, unstoppable true self. She didn’t feel bad about taking her space family’s hands, Matt included, and facing down her parents because it wasn’t selfish. It was asking for her due and nothing more.
But, as Pidge skidded to a stop, Matt bit his lip and pulled up just behind her. Because she was still incredible to him. She was his little sister, tech wizard, Paladin of the Green Lion, and gremlin extraordinaire: Pidge Holt. She was all that and more. She wasn’t just a sister; she was his sister. He just hoped he would get to stand beside her and watch as Pidge came into her own.
Pidge turned, locking ethereal amber eyes with her brother’s matching pair, and she could feel a single truth pulsing through her veins. A single truth. Because she wasn’t wrong. She wasn’t wrong.
“Pi—”
“Duh, I’m okay,” scoffed Pidge, cocking her head as a reckless grin blossomed across her lips, curling up into her eyes. “I’ve been doing these operations for over a decaphoeb! Plus, your code basically disabled anyone who’s going to cross us, so now I know you’re not going to get shanked by some stupid sentry. But now’s not the time for stuff like that! We can talk through feelings and freakouts once we have the data in our flash drives and are on our way back home in Green. Sounds good?”
She wasn’t wrong when she said she deserved better.
Pidge barely waited to catch the tension drain from her brother’s shoulders, pivoting to dash down the hallway again.
“But will you be okay back on Earth?”
Pidge barreled down the corridor, passing through a fake wall and barely resisting the urge to cackle as the lights brightened instantly. Any half-decent scientist needed the proper lighting to get their work done; guess that meant the rest of the ship was purposely gloomy. Pidge tightened her grip around her bayard, and bit back a smile as Matt’s eyes flashed into her mind again.
Are you okay?
Pidge laughed, shaking her head slowly as she punched the control panel to open all doors in the hallway. Her brother could be just as much an idiot as he was a genius at times.
“Alright, let’s go!” She cheered, energy pulsing through her, and bouncing on her heels as Matt caught up with her, a grin still wavering in his eyes. “At this rate, we’ll be back on Earth by tomorrow.”
She glanced over at him, smirking as they hurried towards the first room. “So drop the worried face, you look like Lance when he found Allura asleep in the kitchen sink,” she added, grinning at the chuckle she managed to draw from her brother as she kicked down the door with a resounding THUD. “And, anyway, s’not like my love’s that weak.”
The doors slammed against the ground, and Pidge pumped her fists into the air with a triumphant howl.
She didn’t have to need someone to love them. She could grow beyond her family, could travel through space with her found family, but that didn’t mean she wouldn’t come back to their arms on Earth. Her parents and her brother were also her family, and someday, no matter what, she would be able to stand up unabashedly and not care whether they loved her or hated her because she would always be their daughter.
But, for now, Pidge would just be herself. And, maybe, just maybe, that would be enough. Maybe being Pidge was enough.
Matt barely managed to keep himself from sinking to the ground, and Pidge spun around the room like a caffeinated fairy, whooping as tears sprang to her eyes. Matt was practically choking on his ecstasy, his eye drinking in the light of the room, and he tackled Pidge in a twirling hug. The two cheered, Pidge holding tight to her brother as he spun her around the room, the entire world melting away around them. It was just Pidge, Matt, and the comet they had risked everything to find.
“We did it!” Cried Pidge, tears trickling down her cheeks as she pulled out her flash drive and computer, her smile glowing brighter than any supernova. “Matt, we finally did it!”
Matt let out a strangled sob that sounded like he was trying to laugh, and he squeezed her close to him.
“I knew we could!” He breathed. “I knew you could do it, Pidge!”
Pidge scoffed, smacking his arm as she slipped free of the hug and plugged her computer into the main terminal.
“Are you kidding me?” She replied, grinning at him like everything she ever could have asked for was already with her, was already within her heart. “We did it together, bro! This victory,” she murmured, sliding her flash drive in and starting to hack the system, “goes to the Holt siblings!”
Matt chuckled, ruffling her hair, and pulling out his bo-staff as his timer gave a warning beep. They had used up half of their time. He snickered, pulling out a camera and snapping pictures of every detail of the room. Fifteen dobashes was plenty of time.
“Pidge, you’ve got the data?” He asked, sliding the pictures onto his last flash drive as his eyes flickered around the brightly-lit laboratory.
Pidge hummed in acknowledgement, and Matt yanked off his cloak. He turned to the nearest table, sweeping half of the tools onto his cloak. The comet loomed over them, chiselled and pulsing with a cruel purple light. Slivers of white snaked through it, but the rest was a pitch-black. Tubes connected it to half of the laboratory, and Matt swore he caught a glimpse of green liquid passing through some of them. The comet crackled with black electricity, and Pidge bit back the urge to throw up all over her computer as Lance’s scream echoed through her ears once more, his eyes shared with her own as light blinded them, feet digging into the ground and shield splintering as the ion cannon blazed against the two of them. No wonder Haggar had been able to pull that one out of nowhere.
Matt finished stealing a few tables of supplies (including some glass vials with a sparkling blue liquid that he reaaaaaaaally hoped were stronger than they seemed, because he did not want to find that leaking through his coat late), and tied the makeshift bag tight. He turned back to his sister, who’s lightning fingers had hacked them into the server and was already starting to download the data.
“I’m going to try to do some damage around here; have you got all the direct data?” He called.
“Give me a few more dobashes,” warned Pidge, fingers flying over the keys. “I’m almost done; I’ll let you know when I’ve moved on to the recorded files.”
“Gotcha!”
Matt smashed his bo-staff through the remaining vials of blue, green, orange, and a strangely sizzling pink liquid, leaving them to melt through the table and hiss as they made contact with the floor. That had better not be the ones he had in his cloak, geez. Pidge smirked as her brother spun around the room, breaking whatever tools he could and hiding the ones he couldn’t. Not a permanent solution, but it should slow them down. Finally, finally, they were able to finish what they were sent here to do.
“Direct data has been downloaded!” She reported. “Accessing secondary files now! Matt, switch with me, my bayard’s tip should be able to help with this!”
Matt saluted with a cheeky grin, scar wrinkling across his cheek into a little smiley face, and the two high-fived as Pidge summoned her bayard and Matt took her place in front of the computer. He was better at handling secondary information, anyway.
Pidge spun, eyes flickering over the comet, tracking the tubes running through the room as if the comet were the heart of the lab. As if it were the heart of the ship. She bit her lip, aiming her bayard at the lowest hanging one. If she could just get the angle right, she might be able to swing across to—
“Not so fast!” Snarled a familiar voice, grating over Pidge’s ears like nails on a chalkboard and turning her blood to ice.
Her stomach flipped, and Pidge twisted, flinging her bayard towards one of the people her mind knew she couldn’t defeat despite her heart’s howls for vengeance. Haggar dodged the blade, snatching the rope and yanking Pidge off-balance as her other hand rose, fingers crackling with electricity.
Pidge wrenched her bayard free of Haggar, tearing the witch to the side and throwing off her aim. Pidge shot her bayard through one of the tubes, letting it whip her out of the way as green liquid poured down between her and Haggar, Matt’s steady clicking never once flinching despite the battle growing around him. Pidge dropped in front of him, raising her bayard, and Haggar raising hissing yellow eyes to lock with the Green Paladin’s as the waterfall of goo slowed to a halt. The comet let out a creak. Pidge raised her chin high, gloved fingers clenching tightly around her bayard, hood shifting against her back, and glasses catching the light. Her short hair poked at her ear, her favorite shoes biting into the floor, and she dropped into the fighting stance Allura and Shiro had spent phoebs helping her perfect. She wasn’t fighting alone. It was never one-on-one when you were a Paladin of Voltron; if you came for one, then you came for all them. Because, light years away or not, Pidge carried her family with her in everything that she did.
“You’re not getting past me!” Roared Pidge, eyes flashing a searing green, and shadow twisting across the floor to snarl at Haggar, muscles coiled at ready to pounce at a moment’s notice, ready to protect her universe anytime and everytime; Pidge raised her bayard and that unflinching, reckless, blazing smile that was completely, utterly, and undeniably hers. “I’m a Paladin of Voltron, pilot of the Green Lion, and I will never yield an inch to the likes of you!”