The music playing on for only two
The girls study and practice together practically every night. Even Caleb has started to notice.
“Beauregard, you have been bailing on our study group, is everything alright?” He asks her one day in their shared Western History class.
“Yeah, I’ve just been doing independent study,” she easily lies. It’s not that she doesn't trust Caleb, it’s just that she likes having Yasha all to herself. It feels as if talking about it, actually saying it out loud, would break their bubble together.
Not even Jester pushes Beau to talk about it. Not yet at least, Beau knows it’s only a matter of time before her friend starts pestering her to spill the beans about Yasha, but Beau appreciates Jester keeping it low-key for now.
The issue is, Beau wouldn’t even know what to say about Yasha. Does she love spending time with her? Of course. Does she think about Yasha and only Yasha on the nights they don’t hang out? Yeah. Does she feel happier when Yasha is around? Sure. But this is a normal feeling when you get your best friend back after twelve years. At least that’s what Beau tells herself.
They still haven't broached the topic of past relationships yet. Everything feels so delicate right now, Beau doesn’t want to ruin what they have by pushing Yasha if she’s not ready. She’s still too confused herself to know if she wants more with Yasha.
It’s a few minutes past eleven at night when Yasha decides to take a break from studying and start practicing her harp. Beau has been attempting to study but instead has let herself get completely distracted by Yasha’s presence in the room. By now she has squirmed out of the desk and onto the floor, and Yasha has taken notice.
“You know there’s a chair right there Beau,” Yasha says, entertained by the girl’s antics.
“The floor is actually pretty fuckin' comfy, maybe more so than the chair.”
“That may be true but it doesn’t change the fact that wind players use this room to practice.”
“So? Are you prejudiced against them or something?”
“No but they have spit valves and they just release it all onto the floor whenever they want.”
Beau is immediately grossed out, but is far too stubborn to move. So, she stays still, shocked in disgust, and Yasha just laughs at the girl's disposition.
Yasha is playing something different tonight. She’s been noodling around working on composing a score for Jester’s film, but now she’s playing a piece that Beau doesn’t think she composed.
It has a melancholy melody, it makes Beau yearn for something that she doesn't think she's ever had. Beau doesn’t have any formal training in classical music, but she thinks this might be the prettiest music she’s ever heard. Yasha plays for five minutes, maybe six, with her eyes closed, just being absorbed in the music. She doesn’t have any music in front of her, and for those several minutes, Yasha and the music become a single entity. Beau is completely enthralled by the girl in front of her. This might be the most beautiful music she’s ever heard, but this is definitely the most beautiful thing she’s ever seen.
The piece ends in a more contemplative manner, leaving Beau wanting more, but being ever so grateful for the music while it lasted. She didn't dare talk first, being too scared to shatter the beauty of the moment. She looks at Yasha’s face. The taller girl has now opened her eyes, and is slumped down into her chair, staring at her harp, barely breathing.
Yasha is the first to break the silence, “That was called Nocturne. Composed by Alan Hovhaness.”
“Oh. Cool.” Is all Beau can say in response, sensing that there’s more that Yasha wants to say.
“It was Zuala’s favorite. She asked me to play it for her all the time.” Yasha pauses for a moment, finally making eye contact with Beau.
“Zuala,” Beau says, “Who is she?”
“She was my girlfriend. I thought I was gonna marry her someday,” Yasha responds, grief ridden on her face.
“What happened?”
“We were in a car crash senior year of high school. We made it through all four years dating, under the radar, but fighting for the chance to be us under the radar. It was a few weeks before prom, and I was driving us to go look at dresses. I was making a left turn and a car came speeding through a red light and it hit her side. The whole car flipped, but she took the brunt of the blow. I was pinned down and I couldn’t reach her or save her. By the time the paramedics arrived, she wasn’t breathing anymore.”
Yasha took a long, shaky breath. Beau immediately reaches out to grab her hand.
“Yash,” Beau begins, “I’m so sorry. I hate that you had to go through that.”
“It has… pained me for a long time. It still hurts, I don’t know if it’ll ever stop hurting, but for a long time I let the grief hold me back. I don’t want to be chained back anymore,” Yasha says, looking away from Beau back towards her harp.
A few moments pass, both girls silent but feeling comforted just by the other’s presence.
Beau breaks the silence this time, “You remember my girlfriend Tori I mentioned?” Yasha nods and Beau continues, “It’s not the same or comparable by any means, and honestly I didn't see myself marrying her, but I do know what it’s like to have someone ripped away from you. I guess I just want you to know, I get it.”
“Thank you Beau. I’m sorry to bring the mood down tonight. I’ve been meaning to tell you about her and us, but Nocturne came to me tonight and I knew I had to tell you.”
“I’m glad you did. We’ve both become very different people in the past decade. I want to know it all,” Beau says sheepishly.
“I want to know just as much about you too, Beau.”
They’re still holding hands, and neither wants to stop, so they don’t. Beau goes back to (pretending) to read her book, staring at the words, but Yasha keeps looking at Beau for several more moments. Realizing she can’t exactly play harp with one hand, Yasha goes back to composing, enjoying the presence of the smaller girl next to her.
When Beau gets home around one in the morning, Jester notices a difference in the girl’s demeanor.
“Why do you look like that?” Jester asks bluntly.
“Why do I look like what?” Beau asks back, feigning innocence.
“You know, you’re acting all goofy. You’re walking with no direction, which is not like you at all, you’re always running somewhere, and you have this stupid smile on your face,” Jester says, leaping towards Beau and poking her face.
“What Jess I can’t be goofy sometimes?”
“OH MY GOD DID YOU FINALLY KISS YASHA?” Jester screams.
“No what do you mean finally kiss Yasha what... why would I... what?” Beau stutters out, completely flustered.
“Oh my god Beau I’ve been trying so hard to ignore your crush and leave you alone but now it’s just sad.”
“What no Jess I don’t have a crush on Yasha. She was my best friend for years, obviously I care about her a lot.”
“Mhm… well on a totally unrelated note you know how we’re filming the nightclub scene this weekend?”
“Yeah?” Beau asks suspiciously.
“Well, Professor Brenatto is gonna be there so it needs to be perfect and basically we don't have enough extras so I’m officially casting you and Yasha as extras in the club,” Jester says with a smile and before Beau even has time to protest or comment, Jester is hopping away to her room for the night.
Well, Beau thinks to herself, All things considered, Yasha does owe me a dance.