Haunting Memories
Lin ran a hand through her hair with a sigh. Korra and her friends had landed in Republic City earlier that day. She wouldn’t admit it, but she felt terrified seeing them. She knew that Korra would only come back if tensions were running extremely high in the Southern Water Tribe. She also knew that Kya was leaving to travel with Tenzin to some air temples or some spiritual shit, but she still worried over her.
Saikhan popped his head in. “You look like shit,” he said, eyebrows knit in concern.
“Thanks. You sure know how to flatter a lady,” she said dryly, putting her head in her hands.
“How else do you think I got my wife?” He walked over to her and placed a hand on her shoulder. “How are you holding up?”
“I’m not holding up, that’s the problem. I know we need to focus on the Triads and the war going on and how it impacts our city. All I can think about is if she’s safe or not and I-” Her voice cut off, eyes filling with unshed tears. “I can’t focus on anything else and it makes me feel weak. Why are feelings so damn irrational?” she said with disbelief.
Saikhan let out a chuckle and pulled her into a hug. “Love makes you feel irrational. It’s called having normal emotional reactions to stress you dumbass. Lin Beifong, I love you, but you can be a dense motherfucker at times.”
She punched him in the shoulder. “Alright Captain, remind me to accidentally make sure you get fired,” she said, sticking her tongue out at him.
“Come on, we have to observe that peace march,” he said, rolling his eyes at his friend’s dumbass emotional processing issues.
“Saikhan I-” Her voice cut off as she stood up. “I...thank you. For everything,” she said, voice betraying how much emotion she was revealing to him.
“Someone has to keep an eye on you Chief,” he said. “I’ll be here for you, Chief or not.”
She gave him a simple nod, knowing if she said anymore she would start crying in gratitude. She hated expressing emotion around anyone besides Saikhan, Li Meiza, or Kya, but everytime she wanted to, it overwhelmed her. It screamed against her instincts to protect herself and others, but Li Meiza was helping her work through it.
“Let’s get out there,” she said, giving him a gentle fist bump.
The explosion shook her to her core. All around her, she noticed people crying and screaming. One small child looked up at the building in flames, hand loosening on her stuffed turtleduck in shock. She saw Korra and Mako arguing, but everything felt muted. All of the sudden, she wasn’t looking at the Southern Water Tribe Cultural Center, but a hauntingly familiar gray stone building.
She walked away from the chaos, not even noticing she was moving until she collapsed in an alley. “No, no, no,” she muttered, trying to stop remembering. She went through the grounding exercise Li Meiza taught her, but engaging her senses didn’t help. It only made things worse, reinforcing the arid stench of smoke, fire, ash and death. She closed her eyes, trying to stop drowning in the memories.
The building behind her went up in smoke, causing her to loosen her grip on Saikhan in shock. She placed him and her coworker down gently by a healer before calling out for Raina. There was no response, just the smoking rubble of the building taunting her silently. Her mother glared at her and had her mouth opened in a familiar roar of anger. She knelt by the smoldering ruins, feeling the guilt weigh her down.
She groggily registered someone kneeling next to her, running a hand up and down her back. They murmured gentle words of encouragement, holding her tight.
“Kya?” she asked, confused about what was going on.
“Hey, it’s Saikhan. Come on, let’s go home,” he said, helping her stand up.
She wordlessly let him lead her away from the wreckage. Everything moved in a blur around her. She briefly registered Saikhan leading her to a Satomobile and taking her up to his apartment.
“Your extra sweats are in the dresser,” he said, opening the door to the guest room.
She gave him a brief nod of thanks. She knew she wasn’t focused right now and probably ignored all of her manners, but Saikhan and Hoya knew her. They both knew she couldn’t focus on shit right now, hell she barely remembered the drive here.
Lin quickly showered and dressed in her sweats. She pulled the RCPD hoodie over her head, feeling like the fabric was giving her one of Kya’s soft, warm hugs. She walked out into the main room with a small smile.
Hoya handed her a small bowl of warm jook as she sat down.
“Thank you,” she said with a small smile.
“Do you want to talk about what happened?” Saikhan asked, eyebrows knit in concern. Hoya reached a hand across the table and gently squeezed her hand.
She closed her eyes before letting out a sigh and opening them. “I had a flashback to what happened with Raina. I wasn’t here anymore...I was there. You were bleeding out in my arms, Raina was dead, and my mom was screaming as usual,” she said with a dry laugh.
“Well, if I ever see your mom remind me to slap her in the face,” Hoya muttered, drawing a surprised laugh out of both police officers. “She sounds like a bitch! You just went through trauma and she yelled at you, like what the fuck?”
Lin chuckled. “Yeah, she could be a bitch at times. She definitely wasn’t a gentle parent, or very active one, I had to pick up the slack with Su. She did the best she could, but it just wasn’t enough.”
They all talked for a bit before Lin let out a small yawn. “Alright Chief Sleepy, time for bed time,” Saikhan said.
“I’m fine,” she insisted. To her surprise, Saikhan stood up and hoisted her over his shoulder. “
She let out a very undignified yelp. “Saikhan you BITCH!” She screamed in surprise. “Put me down!”
He chuckled and threw her on the bed, knowing he didn’t hurt her. She glared at him, but couldn’t keep up her irritated facade for long. He knew her too well for that.
“Thank you,” she said.
“Of course. We have to look out for each other, remember?” he said, enveloping her in a hug. In the early days of police training, the two made a promise to look out for each other. Decades later, they still kept that promise.
“Goodnight,” she said, squeezing him tightly before letting him go.
“Goodnight,” he said, walking out of the room.
To no one’s surprise, Chief Beifong looked and felt like shit the next day. She looked at Raiko, wondering if it would be easier to simply murder the man and cover it up. She still held a bitter grudge against him after dismissing her girlfriend’s skills when she worked on the force.
Saikhan nudged her in the side as they left the room. “Thankfully you didn’t kill him.”
“Yet. Yet is the key here,” she said, glancing at him with amusement.
He rolled his eyes, stopping to glance at the desks in concern. “Shit, Mako’s been here for days. He’s sleeping at his damn desk. Lin,” he said, turning to look at her.
“That’s your ‘you-fucked-up’ voice, what did I do this time? Oh I know! You realized I am far hotter than you’ll ever be,” she said with a smirk.
He hit her in the back of the head. “Come on, cut that shit out. You know you care about the kid!”
“I-I don’t!” The blush staining her cheeks definitely didn’t help her case.
He raised an eyebrow unconvinced. “Uh huh, sure thing. Take him back with you, the poor kid is neglecting himself. A tad bit too familiar of a situation there Chief,” he said, nudging her in the side.
She rolled her eyes, but walked over to his desk. The firebender had dark bags under his eyes and looked exhausted. He had a death grip on his coffee mug, probably only running on fumes and caffeine at this point if his face was any indication.
“KId you don’t look hot,” she said, voice light with amusement.
“I have to work this,” he said, looking up at her with a determination that reminded her far too much of herself.
“You’re no good when you run yourself into the ground. Come on, you’re coming home with me because you need someone to make sure you aren’t going to die from a lack of care. Come on,” she said.
Surprised, he followed her back to the apartment. She opened the door to her home with a sigh. “Alright kid, Kya loves to steal Bumi’s shit for some reason. She has an absurd amount of his sweats in the dresser there. They’re clean but will probably be big,” she said with an apologetic shrug.
“I-” His voice cut off. “Thank you Chief.”
“Don’t mention it kid. Go get cleaned up,” she said, turning to her room to change. She quickly bent her armor off before throwing on some loose sweats and a white tank top.
She quickly chopped up some vegetables and decided to just reheat her leftovers from yesterday. She heated some of the halibut stew on the stove, the smell reminding her of her girlfriend.
“I didn’t know you cooked Water Tribe food,” Mako commented, coming out of the guest room in comically big sweats.
She let out a snort. “I had to learn when Kya moved in. She’s a sucker for these meals,” she said.
“She’s the one, isn’t she? She’s the girl you told me about at that restaurant,” he said.
“How the fuck did you figure that out kid?” she asked, voice full of disbelief.
“You had this little smile on your face talking about her. I remembered you mentioning she made you happy, you two live together, and I saw those lingering glances when she was on the force. It just connected the dots for me,” he admitted sheepishly.
“You’re perceptive as hell kid,” she said.
“Only when it comes to other people’s issues. When it comes to my own shit, I am clueless.”
“I feel you,” she said with a laugh.
“How have things been between you two?” he asked, eating some of the stew.
“Well, it’s going well. I’m thinking of carving a betrothal necklace for her,” she said. “I just don’t know how to work it with her necklace.”
“Well, maybe you could bend a hole in the stone,” Mako said. “Then you can attach it using a metal ring you can bend on and off.”
“Shit kid, you’re like a genius,” she said appreciatively. “I’ll talk with Ialli soon about it. She’s the owner of this hippy store Kya likes and she’s from the Southern Tribe as well. She may be able to help me with a design.”
“I hope it works out well for you two,” he said.
“Me too. Now come on kid, you need your rest.” She held up a hand to cut off his protests. “I’ve been in your role before. Saikhan was getting on my case and it helped me, even if I don’t like to admit it. It’s okay to get help and I recognize that fatigue,” she said gently.
“Thank you for everything,” he said, offering an exhausted salute.
“Of course kid. Goodnight,” she replied, walking into her room. She threw herself on the bed, feeling the exhaustion seep into her bones. She quickly fell asleep, ignoring the disturbingly mother-like protective urges that surged within her when she helped Mako. Nope, I can’t deal with this shit. It’s too damn late, she thought, rolling over to sleep.