Assurance
Kelly walked his little brother out of there as soon as he could. If he didn’t there was nothing stopping him from starting a fight and that was not what Evan needed right now. He could feel him shaking in his arms, “Hey hey hey, munchkin you have to breath, just like I taught you, come on you can do it.” He listened as he took deep breaths, in and out, “there you go.”
When he finally calmed down Evan looked up at him and smiled that same little smile he’s done all his life. When Evan came to live with them he remembered how small he’d use to make himself, like he was trying become invisible. He remembered how quiet he was, it broke his heart to see him that way. He had made a promise that day that he’d always make sure he never looked that sad again but now he feels like he let him down.
A soft quiet, “don’t,” interrupted his thoughts, “this is not your fault, you have never broken that promise Kel. You and Maddie are more alike then you think, she’s no doubt blaming herself too but it’s neither of your fault, I let it go on too long...”
“Don’t munchkin, if it’s not my fault, then it’s not your fault. If it’s anyone’s it’s theirs. You had every right to be upset, you know it and I know, they even know it but they’re so stuck on thinking they were protecting you that they can’t see they were only hurting you. I know what it’s like to work with people you consider family but I also know the only kind of protection they need from me is having their backs in the field and the trust in each other to do our jobs effectively and safely. There’s always that fear you’re going to lose someone, it’s part of the job but you can’t let it rule you, you let it guide you. They let it rule them.”
“He’s right Evan.” Maddie said. When Kelly met her eyes he could see the pain and anger in her eyes. “Both you and Howie go to work everyday and there’s a chance you could never make it home but I would never tell you to stop. I have the trust in you that you’ll do your safely and come home to me, nobody gets to make that decision for you but you.”
Kelly could feel Evan pull out of his arms and straight into hers, “I’m sorry Maddie.”
She burrowed into his neck, “you have nothing to apologize for, you did nothing wrong, this is on them.”
“Maddie...”
“No Evan, you’re my brother, it’ll always be you, don’t ever forget that. Now come on, let’s go get some breakfast, maybe show Kelly around and then we’ll figure out where we go next.”
Kelly smiled even though he could still see doubt in his little brother eyes, though there wasn’t as much as there was before. “I am pretty hungry.”
Evens laughed, “luckily we know just the spot.”