Chapter 14
“... and last thing and this is very important,“ the nurse finished her long rant of things to do to make sure Chloe’s vocal chords healed properly. “No talking for 3 to 7 days depending on how sore you feel. Though, you did wait an awfully long time to come here so I’d go with the full 7. Talking includes whispering, humming, anything really.”
As if Chloe Beale could wait 7 days to talk.
She nodded to the nurse who finally let her alone for a moment. The doctor said the surgery had gone well and had prescribed her a couple of painkillers just in case but Chloe already felt brand new. She took out her phone and nearly dropped it when she saw the text from one of her fellow Bellas.
“Chloe! The Footnotes got disqualified! We’re moving to the Finals!!!”
It took everything in her not to squeal out of joy again. She settled on tapping the little table over her bed in excitement. The Bellas were back. Her life finally had purpose again. The redhead already started thinking about what they needed to do to make sure they were ready for the competition that was in only a month. Screw her exams that were coming up around the same time, she had more important things to do.
She checked her other notifications, happy to see that Aubrey had texted in the Bellas group chat and that she was still in it.
Aubrey
Emergency Bellas ASAP. I’ll contact you guys when I find a time
This time, she was determined to make changes. They weren’t going to win Finals with their original setlist and she had a plan to make it all better.
beca :)
not-so patiently waiting for your text here
red
hi :)
guess what :)
beca :)
what?
red
the footnotes got disqualified which means /we/ got qualified for the finals
beca :)
no way!! thats awesome
happy for you chlo
red
i know!! im so happy i could scream but i cant
beca :)
so the surgery went well?
red
everything is aca-awesome again
beca :)
yikes
how many days do you have to stay quiet?
red
the nurse said 3 to 7 :(
beca :)
as if you can keep quiet for that long
red
that’s what i told myself!
beca :)
i have an idea for something we could do that doesnt involve talking
red
oooh sounds sexual i’m in
beca :)
i didnt mean it like that perv
an actual activity out of the bedroom
red
boring then
can we go back to the bedroom idea?
beca :)
shut up
shit gotta go stace is calling me over
take care of yourself red
She smiled to herself, putting her phone over her heart. She wondered what Beca had in store for them and she also wondered when they were going to get a time back alone in a bedroom for real.
The doctors finally discharged her and she was surprised to see Aubrey at the entrance. The surprise must have shown on her face because the blonde quickly explained herself.
“I took a taxi here because I figured you’d be too tired to drive back. I wanted to help.” Chloe took a step towards her friend that she missed so dearly in these past couple of weeks. “I wanted to help.”
Chloe couldn’t stop herself anymore. She threw herself in Aubrey’s arms and hugged her tightly. The blonde did the same to her and Chloe felt a weight lifted off her shoulders. She couldn’t believe how good this day had been. They hugged for a long time, probably worrying the people around them and making them think something horrible had happened but Chloe was just so happy to have her friend back.
“I’ve just been so stressed out and now that we’re back in the competition, I just want my best friend back,” Aubrey muttered in her hair and Chloe squeezed tighter in response. She felt the same way.
The redhead was thankful that Aubrey came because she was in fact pretty tired. She was about to fall asleep when the blonde lowered the music of the car and cleared her throat.
“I know you can’t talk right now but I will. I just wanted to apologize for blowing up at you. But like my dad always said, if you’re not here to win get the hell out of Kuwait and I just freaked out. Posens don’t lose usually, you know?” Chloe looked over at her and put a hand on her shoulder.
There were so many things she wanted to say. She wanted to apologize for not warning Aubrey and jeopardizing their place. She wanted to say that the past was in the past because now they could finally concentrate on the ICCA the way they should have been from the start.
She squeezed her shoulder and Aubrey seemed to get the message so that was enough for now.
The painkillers made her pretty sleepy so she passed out as soon as she got in her bed. Then Aubrey woke her up for dinner, they ate in front of a movie and then she passed out once again.
She woke up the next morning pretty late and she was glad to see that even if her throat was a little sore, she felt refreshed. She took her phone and her eyes widened when she saw how many texts she had from Beca. So glad to have her best friend back, she completely forgot the Dames were out there celebrating.
beca :)
chloooooo
iwish you were hre
life is so much cooooler when yourew hrere
cause you smell so pretty
i like kissing you so mcujh did you know
youre suc a good kisser
i like sleeping wiyh u
sex or no sex
:D
Then she had a lovely selfie that Beca took of herself where she was pouting at the camera and she had an arm around her neck that seemed to belong to Stacie from the half-face that she could see on the screen. Chloe laughed quietly to herself, her heart fluttering at the thought of drunk Beca thinking about her. It was also pretty nice to have the confirmation that Beca liked kissing her and sleeping with her which is something that sober her would have never admitted.
red
you are just the cutest little thing arent you
i like kissing you and sleeping with you too becs ;) sex or no sex
She expected for the answer to come later so she moved to get out of bed but her phone buzzed instantly.
beca :)
oh god
i’m never talking to you again this is so embarrassing
red
stop it it was cute
beca :)
i hate drunk me
i also hate drunk me for drinking so much christ my head is killing me
red
take some painkillers!
beca :)
too early for exclamation points beale
red
wow
someone’s dramatic
beca :)
let me wallow in peace
i’m still trying to get over the embarrassment that i sent you that selfie
red
i think you look absolutely adorable
beca :)
that's part of the problem
She spent the whole day in bed watching TV shows and texting Beca. They were both feeling too tired to do anything else so it was a good coincidence and it gave them the chance to talk all day about everything and nothing. Even from her dorm room, Beca had the power to make her smile instantly.
They made plans to do Beca’s activity that she planned the next day and Aubrey arranged a meeting with the Bellas this Tuesday. The realization that her Tuesdays and Saturdays suddenly became free without the Dames’ practices made her pretty sad but she was glad she’d have the Bellas to focus on again.
So the next day, Beca came to pick her up after class was done for both of them. Aubrey was in the house and stared at them from the window making Beca wave obnoxiously at her. Things were better with Aubrey but she knew the blonde was still pissed about losing the semi finals and still blamed Chloe and Beca for it.
It wasn’t fair that Beca was being blamed for this when the girl didn’t even know what she was planning to do when they made the mash up but Aubrey would find any reason to blame Beca. She was still convinced Chloe would have never done that if Beca hadn’t been there.
Which was, in a way, true. Beca gave Chloe more courage and made her want to try new things. She was discovering things that had been hidden in her all along but it was like the hockey player was helping her shed those things to light, to make her be the best Chloe she could be.
When Chloe went to sit down on the passenger seat, she saw a notepad with a pen on top of the seat. She picked it up to sit down and Beca looked at her silently as she read what was written at the top of the page.
Chloe Beale’s aid for when she really really needs to talk but she can’t
She looked at the hockey player amused and Beca rubbed the back of her neck. “Just thought it would come in handy if you need to tell me something. I’m kinda nervous about having to hold the conversation on my own,” she joked and Chloe smiled.
She took the pen and wrote down her first words.
Looking forward to learning more about you today :)
Beca chuckled and put the car in drive. Chloe put the radio on and they listened to music as they went on a route that was very familiar to the redhead. She wanted to say something but she couldn’t so she just looked at Beca in question but the girl simply smiled, keeping her mouth shut.
It was when they Beca parked in the parking lot of the arena that she finally stopped the games. She put her arm around Chloe’s seat in a very attractive way and seemed pretty pleased with herself.
“So I talked to Gail who talked to the guy who owns the place and he managed to find a time where nobody was using the ice and it wouldn’t be a problem if I were here. So, you and I are going ice skating.”
Chloe’s heart leaped in her chest and a smile split her face in half. She couldn’t believe Beca would do that for her.
“I got my skates in the trunk and I also contacted Aubrey to find out your shoe size and I rented some for you,” Beca continued.
Knowing Beca, texting Aubrey must have been hell for her so she couldn’t believe she’d even go through all that trouble for that. The urge to kiss the hockey player was so strong but before she could, Beca got out of the car, seemingly really happy about what they were gonna do. She threw her hockey bag over her shoulder and waited for Chloe to walk to her.
“I hope you know how to skate,” Beca said while opening the door for Chloe. “Because that might be a dealbreaker on our friendship, Red.”
She knew how to skate but she hadn’t done it in a few years. She nodded to Beca to show that she did and thought about how if she fell, Beca would probably catch her anyways. When they entered the lobby, there was a man sitting in the office that got up when she saw them. Beca immediately walked up to him and shook his hand.
“Mr B, I just wanted to thank you again. This means a lot to me.”
He seemed like a nice man, with a round belly and a big beard and he kinda reminded the ginger of Santa Claus. He smiled at Beca and accepted the handshake.
“No problem, Mitchell. You’re one of the best players that ever skated on this ice anyways,” the man spoke in a thick canadian accent that made Chloe smile.
Chloe could see Beca’s flushed face from here. “Well thank you, sir. Here, this is Chloe,” the hockey player said, taking Chloe’s hand to drag her closer and then put her hand on the small of her back. “That’s who I wanted to do this for.”
“Well it’s very nice to meet you, Chloe.”
“She can’t talk because of a surgery she had,” Beca explained quickly when all the redhead could do was smile. The man looked at both of them and then nodded.
“Oh well, alright then. I hope you two have a lovely date. Try to be careful, eh?”
The word seemed to have an impact on both of them; Beca removed her hand from the small of her back like it had been on fire and Chloe’s heart skipped a beat. He didn’t seem to notice what he said got a reaction out of them and went back to his office to leave them alone.
Beca suddenly seemed nervous and Chloe bit on her lower lip anxiously. He could have meant it as a friend date for all that’s worth but things were… particular between Chloe and Beca. You couldn’t really be mad at him for thinking it was a date when it had all the exact components of a date. After all, they did everything that a couple do; they kissed, had sex, slept in the same bed, hung out doing activities that could be considered dates.
But they weren’t dating.
They were having fun.
Whatever the hell that meant.
The feeling of knowing they could be something that meant so much more was bubbling in Chloe’s stomach and she just hoped it wouldn’t explode before graduation. It was better to just enjoy things right now and deal with the hurt later when Beca’s in LA. She’ll be able to handle it. She was a very physical person that could probably not do a long distance relationship and anyways, she didn’t even know if Beca wanted to date her in the first place so it was stupid to think about.
She followed the hockey player to the unlocked locker room and it was silent, obviously, but she knew it wasn’t quiet just because Chloe couldn’t talk. It was more uncomfortable than usual.
The whole thing was worse because Chloe couldn’t even talk to make things less weird so she awkwardly grabbed the notepad and wrote something down quickly. Beca took out two pairs of skate and two hockey jerseys that had her name on the back.
I’m really excited :), Chloe wrote. Simple, but effective because the hockey player immediately seemed to relax.
“Here,” Beca said, handing her a MITCHELL jersey. Chloe looked at it with interrogation points in her eyes. Not that she wasn’t excited about wearing the jersey because it seemed to always have a very positive affect on Beca when it was the first thing that Chloe put on after sex. “I just thought you wouldn’t dress knowing we were coming here and you’d be cold,” the brunette explained as if it was not a big deal.
But Chloe knew it was because it meant Beca had thought all this through and it really warmed her heart. She was only wearing a long sleeved tee and she would’ve been cold and the fact that Beca anticipated it and brought something for her just made Chloe want to kiss her a million times.
“You’re cute,” she mouthed with a smile and Beca rolled her eyes and bent down to put on her skates.
She put on the hockey jersey and caught Beca’s side glance that she tried to cover up with her hair. She smiled and took the white ice skating skates that the girl had rented for her. While they both got ready in silence, Chloe thought the only person she’d be able to spend an entire day with not having to talk would be Beca. It was different with her. It always was.
She looked at the dark hair cascading over her shoulders, in contrast with the green jersey and she took her notepad, wanting to say something.
You know, I think you should give me this jersey so I can remember you when you’re in LA
Beca read it and looked up at Chloe like she was expecting the girl to burst into laughter.
“Wait, you’re serious?”
The redhead nodded and a light blush appeared on the hockey player’s face.
“Oh. Sure, dude.” She seemed so shy about the fact that Chloe wanted to remember her and it was kind of adorable. “But I’ll need something back, you know? So I can remember you too and stuff.”
She quickly grabbed the notepad. I think I have some Harry Potter DVDs I could lend you.
Beca read it and then shoved the notepad in Chloe’s stomach with a laugh. They had tried to watch the third movie one time in Beca’s dorm but since they never managed to finish the second one, Beca had no idea what was happening and they just ended up making out again.
Even though they were alone, songs were playing in the ice rink speaker and it felt so weird walking up there without anyone else on the ice. It suddenly felt so big just the two of them alone. Beca got on the ice first and skated backwards to watch Chloe get on it with a smile on her face.
Chloe put a tentative skate on the ice and when she felt it slid, she held tightly to the board.
“Come on, Red.” Beca said, twirling skillfully to taunt the redhead.
She finally put her second skate on the ice and gave herself a few seconds to regain her balance. She took a few steps and was pleased to see it all came back to her pretty fast. Beca skated to her and held her arm out like a gentleman for Chloe to take.
The redhead looped their arms together, her other hand holding the notepad tightly. In the middle of the first circle around the rink, Chloe almost slipped but just like she predicted; Beca had caught her immediately.
“Not ready for hockey yet, huh?” Beca joked and Chloe rolled her eyes at her. When they were in front of the home bench, she made them stop so she could write something.
How did you get into hockey?
Beca read it and then gestured at Chloe so they could keep skating. They both looked kind of dorky, wearing the exact same jersey, skating next to each other but Chloe couldn’t afford to care. She also thought it was really cute.
They were both silent for another ring around the rink until the hockey player talked.
“Well as you know, I started hockey when I was seven,” Beca started, staring straight ahead. “I saw flyers at school and I thought why not, you know? It looked pretty fun. So I asked my dad and he took me to this ice rink that the park people would make in the park close to my house or whatever. As soon as I put on the skates, I felt something spark up in me. Then it only got more intense when I took the hockey stick in my hands.”
Chloe was looking at her, almost slipping a few times but Beca kept her eyes forward, her hands moving to stabilize the redhead every time.
“We played for hours that day. I loved it. It’s like… I was never good with the whole “emotions” stuff, you know? But when I play, that shit doesn't exist. It’s just me and the puck at the end of my stick. And I like that. I liked that I didn’t have to worry about my parents’ marital problems for a few hours and it’s the same thing with different problems today. Hockey gives me an out.”
She finally looked at Chloe and the redhead mouthed the word “Music?” hoping Beca would understand. Thankfully, she did because she nodded.
“Yeah, it’s the same thing with music. It’s like-- hockey gives me a way to deal with my feelings and music gives me the words I don’t have?” she said, ending the sentence as a question like she wasn’t sure what she was saying was making sense.
It did.
She was aware that not everyone was as vocal as she was about their problems but she was glad that helped Beca deal with all of it. She liked that Beca was a person of passion who had big dreams and worked hard for it. Chloe admired that a lot in the brunette.
She had never been so sure about what she wanted to do. She knew she liked animals and that’s why she picked Animal Studies when she started college and then the years had passed by and suddenly she was at the end of the major.
She didn’t even know if she wanted to be a vet; she basically switched from vet to exotic dancer to teacher every week. The future was just scary for Chloe and she didn’t like the idea that the comfort of Barden would slip between her fingers soon.
They did a couple more loops around the ice without talking. After a while, Beca seemed to think Chloe wasn’t fast enough for her because she pulled away to skate a little around her. She would gain speed and then slow down, make circles around her and skate backwards facing her all while Chloe looked at her with sparkling blue eyes. She could watch Beca do the things she loved for hours; whether it was skating or making mash-ups.
Chloe had fallen asleep on Beca’s bed once to the sound of her making a mash-up and to this day, she swore it was the best nap she ever had.
Chloe’s mind drifted to the Bellas and how she was going to convince Aubrey to make changes for the better. Her plan involved Beca and she needed to get her on board too but she was pretty sure it’d be easier to convince her than Aubrey. With Beca, she could do her puppy eyes and maybe a couple of kisses and with the blonde, she couldn’t really do that. But if Beca had managed to convince Aubrey to text her her shoe size, maybe it wouldn’t be that hard.
Chloe gestured with her finger for Beca to come closer and she did. Chloe wrapped her arms around Beca’s neck to steady herself and she leaned forward to bring her lips close to the girl’s ear.
“I had an idea,” she whispered very delicately in her ear. It hurt a bit but it wasn’t too bad and when Beca froze at the sound, Chloe knew she had to get it out before the hockey player forced her to stop talking. “Your mash-ups could make the Bellas win Finals. With your help, we could create something that no one has ever seen before.”
She pulled away and Beca looked hesitant, like she wasn’t sure it was such a good idea. Chloe knew it was risky and Aubrey would probably flip out if she knew she asked her this but she really did believe in her idea.
“Just think about it,” she mouthed and then because she hadn’t done it in what felt like forever, she attached her lips to Beca’s for a tender kiss. The brunette kissed back immediately, like she too had been dying to have Chloe’s lips on hers again. The redhead was pretty sure she’d never get used to how incredible it felt to kiss the girl she loved.
When they pulled away, Chloe smiled and then started skating again with Beca following closely behind her.
They skated until Chloe’s feet hurt and when they got back in the locker room, Beca let her keep the jersey. It was weird to think the girl would never need that jersey again. She cursed herself for not being able to talk because it was something that she wanted to bring up again; how leaving to LA wasn’t Beca’s only option.
Beca drove her home and when she pulled into the Bellas’ driveway, Chloe forced her into an awkward hug across the console that told Beca just how much today had meant to her. She had had so much fun just hanging out with her and she was glad they got a chance to skate together until they both moved away.
She pulled out her notepad to write one last thing.
I love you.
She heard Beca’s breath hitch when she read it and suddenly it seemed harder to swallow through her dry throat. In slow motion, the hockey player took the notepad and wrote something at an angle that Chloe couldn’t see. She tore up the page and folded it before handing it to the redhead. Chloe took it with a smile and quickly kissed the corner of her mouth before getting out of the car.
It was only when she was all settled in bed that she unfolded the page that Beca tore up.
I love you too.
She folded it back again and brought the note to her heart.
Unbeknownst to Chloe, Beca was thinking the same thing that she was in her dorm room staring hard at her ceiling.
“I wonder if she knows how much I do.”