Sixth Year, Halloween and Bonfire Night
Sunday October 31st 1976
Upon re-entering the common room, Mary had somehow expected the space to appear different in presence than that it had mere moments ago. However, the only thing that had noticeably altered were the appearances of its dwellers. Whereas noting material or tangible about her own appearance had changed, Mary herself felt different as well; a weight had been lifted off her shoulders, all the same, she felt heavier than she`d done beforehand.
Lily had taken out her curlers and taken off her quilted dressing gown; the Charms textbook was still present. `Hiya,` she smiled. `Where`d you disappear off to?`
Mary swallowed, trying to keep the emotion out of her voice. `Broke up with Sirius.`
`Oh Mary,` Lily rose quickly, her book slipping off her lap and thudding to the floor. She wrapped her arms around her. `Are you alright?` she asked, head buried into Mary`s hair.
`Think so,` Mary whispered back, her face also buried into Lily`s red mane of curls. Lily always smelled slightly of apples and cinnamon - something highly comforting and familiar. `It was the right thing to do.`
Lily pulled back and nodded, still holding onto Mary`s arms. `I`m proud of you for standing up for yourself.`
`Yeah, well.` Mary shrugged; it was all she could think of saying.
Not long after, the whole house was heading down to join the rest of the school at the feast. Marlene had descended from their dorm, pinching her nose against the fumes as she`d hurried though the common room.
At the Gryffindor table they chose to sit far away from the boys. Even though Mary desperately wanted to be mature about the whole thing, she truly did not fancy having to see Sirius` face all throughout dinner.
`Does this mean your cat`s back to being named Cat again?` Marlene asked, helping herself to the buttery hog roast.
`Can we not talk about that right now?` Mary asked, cutting into her own dinner. `I just want to enjoy the feast.`
`Och aye, of course.` Marlene nodded, looking rather lively. Out of all of her friends, Marlene was probably the one who`d had disapproved the most of her relationship with Sirius. Hence, it wasn`t all that surprising that she was gloating a little.
The news about the breakup had ostensibly spread like untamed wildfire. Mary had the feeling as if everyone was gawking at her - more so than usual. Some older Slytherin boys were making crude hand motions at her from their side of the hall, leering above the commotion of the feast.
`Can`t they just leave us alone.` Lily sighed. `It`s like they have nothing better to do with their time.`
Despite of the strong feeling that she shouldn`t, Mary kept watching the Slytherin table. Above the heads of all the other students Mulciber caught Mary`s eye; upon noticing he had her, he did not avert his gaze, a tooth baring grin splitting his face in half, one that did not reach his eyes. There was a sickening lurch in Mary`s lower abdomen, along with a violent trembling in her hands, and a strong urge to flee. She pushed her plate of apple crumble far away from her, no longer feeling hungry.
Suddenly, the horrible realisation dawned on her that, without Sirius, she no longer had someone who would protect her at all costs. When she was going out with Sirius, Mary had never had to worry about being attacked whenever he was around. Even though she`d made it rather clear that she didn`t needed protecting, there was absolutely no denying the fact that he`d provided her a sense of security - a safety net of sorts.
Obviously, she still had Lily and Marlene - along with all her other friends. Nevertheless, that was different; wasn`t it? They were her friends; she couldn`t expect of them to make her feel safe in the same way that a boyfriend could. However much she didn`t want to admit to it, she was afraid that on her own, she wouldn`t be able to stand a chance whenever she would get cornered by someone who meant her serious harm.
Lily noticed her staring at Mulciber and touched her gently on the arm. `What`s wrong?`
With a jolt, Mary felt herself drop back into her body. `Nothing,` she shook her head and smiled. `Just lost in thought for a sec.`
Granting the feast was a marvellous as ever, Mary`s appetite for it had disappeared. All she wanted was for the evening to expand and the party to commence.
After the tables had been cleared and everyone had been ordered to go up to their respective common rooms, Mary rose with the rest of Gryffindor to head back to the tower. As they departed the hall, she made sure to stick close to Lily and Marlene, not wanting to get separated from them in the throng of moving bodies.
The bottleneck of the hallway and stairs made it hard to see whom you were pressed up against while trying to mount the steps. Mary felt someone brush close by her; she didn`t have to look to see who it was. She felt the hair in her neck rise as he snarled something - just loud enough for her to hear above the thunderous noise of hundreds of footsteps.
`Don`t think that you`re off the hook - now that you`re no longer the bitch of that nasty blood traitor.`
Mary was prepared to turn around and curse Mulciber right then and there, yet he`d already separated himself from her by a band of younger students. Lily and Marlene didn`t react - seemingly unaware; Mary started to doubt if she`d even heard it correctly, or if her fear was pulling her into uncharted territory.
Fortunately, some of the rumours concerning the Halloween party had indeed been true; one of them being the copious amount of alcohol. Presently, Mary could really do with some lightening of her spirits.
It appeared that the parties thrown by the marauders got wilder and more extravagant by the year; they had truly outdone themselves with this particular one. There were so many gaudy decorations that Mary had to do a doubletake just to make sure that she was actually standing in the Gryffindor common room, and not some sort of dancehall.
`How did they even get so many people to come?` Marlene called out above the music.
`Dunno,` Mary replied, watching a group of Hufflepuff girls clamber through the portrait hole, giggling loudly as James gave them a hand.
She scanned the crowd, making an assessment for her plan of action. Tonight, only one thing was certain: she wanted to have herself a bloody good time. Neither Sirius, nor Mulciber, nor anybody else, was going to deprive her of having a good time.
As luck would have it, the bloody good time she had envisioned herself was staring right at her from across the room.
`Hold my drink.` Mary said, shoving her cup into Marlene`s spare hand.
`What`re you going to do?` Marlene replied, sounding confused, staring down at the cup.
`Roman Rotherhide.` Mary raised her eyebrows, grinning cheekily.
Marlene`s eyes widened. `But you just broke up with Black? Isn`t that, erm…isn`t it a bit early for that?`
`Don`t be so judgmental Marls,` Mary sighed. `It`s not like he`ll care.`
Marlene opened her mouth again, a look on her face as if she wanted to retaliate.
`You`ve fancied Sirius for ages, too,` Mary replied, unwilling to let Marlene hold her back from getting what she wanted. `He`s a free man now - go give it a try. You have my blessings, though, can`t guarantee you that he`s not already seeing someone else.`
With that, Mary left Marlene, striding confidently across the dancefloor. It could have been that the alcohol was warping her perception, but walking though that crowd felt like parting the sea – rising from the foam.
`Hi,` Roman breathed as Mary stopped in her tracks right in front of him.
Mary licked her lips and smiled up at him, feeling the beat of her heart sync up with the rhythm of the music.
`Sorry to hear about your breakup.`
`Oh, well.` Mary shrugged, batting her eyelashes.
There was a short silence in which they merely looked at one another, the tension of promise practically palpable.
`So tell me…` Mary entertained, holding up her empty hands. `Are you going to let a girl be without a drink?`
`I would never.` Roman smirked at her.
***
How come that every single party - without fail - boiled down to her sitting to the side, feeling absolutely abysmal?
Marlene had truly imagined that this one might`ve turned out for the better, but apparently there was no escape from the previously established pattern. She twirled the liquid around in the bottom of her cup, watching it stick to the sides and slide down again - viscous and only partly transparent. The bass notes in the music sunk their teeth into the steps of the staircase, making it tremble underneath her backside; the vibrations running all the way up her spine, thundering ferocious into her skull.
She wondered if it would be noticed if she went upstairs and didn`t come down again until morning. Lily would possibly come looking for her. However, aside from her, there would probably be nobody else who`d truly miss her. Not Mary - certainly not Mary - Mary was too busy getting it on with Prince fecking Charming. Even Marlene was able to see that Roman Rotherhide was annoyingly good-looking - all golden Achilles curls and deep brown eyes. It was no wonder that Mary would be attracted to him; Marlene just wished that Mary would be attracted to her instead.
That what was possibly even worse was the fact that Mary had encouraged her to go after Sirius. To give credit where credit was due: Mary did probably think that by giving her permission to go out with Sirius, she was doing a good and selfless deed. After all, Marlene had used her supposed crush on Sirius as an excuse on many occasion. Nevertheless, that didn`t mean that she actually wanted to go out with him.
Letting her head loll in her hands, Marlene watched Mary from a distance. The music had been changed to a Bay City Rollers` LP, making more people get up from their seats and head towards the dancefloor. Mary had her arms draped nonchalantly around Roman`s neck; pressed together as they moved to the music. They were by far the best looking pair in the entire room.
The maroon dress that Mary had donned hugged her body as if someone had directly painted it onto her skin. Marlene wished that she could reach out a hand and touch the fabric, feel the softness underneath, run her fingers along the seams. Her own body was hard and angular - narrow flanked and tightly wound. It was always battered and bruised from quidditch practice - blue and yellow spots decorating her thighs and arms. Her long thin hands were calloused and rough - the nails always barely there. Mary looked as if someone had sculpted her as a likeness out of the Greek antiquity; smooth and curved as if done so on purpose by the skilful hand of an artist. A siren call of sorts.
`Oi, McKinnon,` James rudely jerked her out of her daydream. `Seen Evans anywhere?`
Annoyed, Marlene blinked and shook her head. `Reckon she`s out there somewhere,` she gestured at the crowd, pointing vaguely. `Probably making sure that nobody drinks that bleeding punch – absolutely vile.` She scrunched up her nose and peered into her cup.
`Sure, yeah.`
`You`re not planning on being an eejit again are you?` Marlene asked.
James narrowed his eyes and looked at her from behind his spectacles, apparently not comprehending.
`No songs, or broom flying antics, or… whatever it is you always do.` Marlene gestured broadly in the air. `Because she really hates that shite.`
`Blimey no,` James frowned, shaking his head. `No, that`s not why I`m looking for her - we`re almost ready for the fireworks and I promised I`d let her know beforehand so she can make sure everything is safe and such.`
`Alright,` Marlene replied, ever so slightly surprised. `Well, still haven`t seen her - I`ll sent her your way if I do though.`
`Cheers.` James slapped her on the shoulder and marched away.
As soon as he`d left, Marlene established her eyes on the dancefloor again. To her absolute horror, Mary and Roman had progressed from dancing to tongue tango. She pressed her lips together tightly and sighed, trying to imagine what it would be like if she were to be Roman. What would it feel like to be kissed by Mary?
She let her eyes wander and discovered Lily dancing with Peter and Desdemona. Remembering that James was looking for her, Marlene wondered if she should alert him. However, that proved to be unnecessary - James had already found Lily. He was standing at the edge of the dance floor, unmoving, a soft smile playing on his lips as he watched her silently; his adoration was practically drooping of his face like thick honey. Taking this as a reality check, Marlene decided that she should probably stop staring at Mary and Roman. Godric knew what her own face looked like.
Ostensibly she wasn’t the only one who was having an utterly miserable time. Remus had left his post as DJ and was sitting by the open window, blowing plumes of smoke into the indigo night, a bottle of something alcoholic perched at his feet. His face was drawn and he kept glancing at the dancefloor.
`Alright, Remus,` Marlene said, leaning against the windowsill.
``Lo.` Remus replied, rather unenthusiastically, taking a drag of his fag.
`Are you ok?` she asked.
Remus shrugged and peered at the dancefloor again. Marlene followed his line of sight; it appeared to be directed at Sirius, who was entertaining Avni - being the gracious host he was.
`D`you know if Black is seeing someone else - now he and Mary are over?` she asked. It would be pretty low if him to move onto a new girl so soon after the breakup. Although, Mary was doing exactly that. At times the two of them were scarily similar.
`Don`t give a shit.` Remus replied, slurring slightly. He appeared to be rather pissed.
Marlene frowned, taken aback by Remus` curt answer. Evidently he didn`t want her bothering him so she left him alone.
She wondered if Sirius had done something to upset him; it wouldn`t be out of Sirius` nature to upset someone. Moreover, Mary had been talking about there being some odd tension between Remus and Sirius for a while now - maybe it was the same thing. Whatever it was, it was really none of her business.
The room was abruptly taken by the first bars of Paradise by the Dashboard Light. Whenever someone put on Meatloaf, it was always met with both groans of utmost annoyance, and cheers of approval. Peter and Desdemona seemed to be in the latter category; they started flinging eachother riotously around on the dancefloor, belting along to the lyrics at the top of their lungs - taking the spot of most envied pair.
Despite her low state of spirits, Marlene smiled to herself. Lily was standing next to James, both laughing as they watched the sweaty red-faced couple performing as if they were on Top of the Pops. Surprisingly enough, Peter was actually not that bad of a singer.
`Gosh, they look adorable don`t they?` Lily said.
`They look like fools.` Sirius snorted.
`Shut up, Black.`
Marlene chuckled, shaking her head and tapping her fingers along to the rhythm. Lily rested her head on Marlene`s shoulder, her pillowy cheek making a momentary home of Marlene`s collarbone.
Lily yawned, trying to stifle it in the crook of her elbow. Noticing this, James stated, `We better get a move on with those fireworks, eh?`
If the commotion surrounding the party hadn`t attracted enough interest from the rest of the castle as it was already, the fireworks surely would have pushed it over the edge. Before long, the sky was freckled in vast red and golden sparks, adding to the pinpricked velvety night sky.
***
Friday November 5th 1976
If the Halloween party hadn`t proved to be plenty of celebration for one week alone, their week of classes was concluded by Bonfire Night. While the tradition was originally bound to the failure of the Gunpowder Plot on the British parliament, most significance ostensibly appeared to have been lost among the majority of the students. Presently, it was predominantly seen as a little speck of light to guide them safely into to darker months. It was promising to be a bitterly cold winter – the forebodes of it already looming in the crisp autumn air.
A gargantuan bonfire had been ignited on the beach of the Great Lake - far away from any foliage to prevent the flames from roaming free and taking their own course with the woods. The entire school had congregated around the fire - warming themselves while feasting on toffee apples and big goblets of pumpkin juice.
Even though it was a celebration of sorts, Lily wasn`t excused from her existing prefect duties. If anything, she was running around more than ever, preventing students from throwing all sorts of things onto the licking flames. Luckily, all those below legal age had been forbidden to take their wands along with them, otherwise she probably would`ve had even more on her hands.
`Lily!` Marlene called, catching her in the midst of confiscating a dungbomb from a second year. `You haven`t sat down all evening.`
`I don`t have the time.` Lily frowned, pocketing the dungbomb – could be useful for later. `Someone needs to make sure that not everything around here explodes.` She glanced around feverishly, already seeing something that probably shouldn`t be happening.
`That`s what Professors are for – it`s not your sole responsibility.` Marlene replied. `Come on, sit with us – even for a little while.`
`I can`t.` Lily shook her head stubbornly and crossed her arms. `What if McGonagall sees me not paying attention?`
`So?`
`That can`t happen.`
`What`re you afraid will happen?` Marlene tilted her head to the side.
Lily shuffled her feet, shifting her weight. `That she`ll thinks I don`t take my duties as a prefect seriously enough and…` she sighed, `That she won`t make me Head girl next year. `
`That`s what you`re afraid of?` Marlene chuckled. `Listen - I say this with full confidence: there is no one who takes their prefect duties as seriously as you do.`
`You really think so?`
`Aye,` Marlene nodded fervently. `McGonagall would be an eejit not to make you Head girl. Now - let`s get you some treacle toffee.`
Walking out in front of her, Marlene funnelled Lily through the crowd in the direction their cohort. They had brought an exuberant amount of blankets and pillows along with them - constructing an almost fort-like construction.
`Welcome to our chateau!` Sirius grinned, opening his arms widely. Avni Chaudry was cozied up to his side; the pair of them had been an item since the Halloween party. Lily would have been indignant on Mary`s behalf; that was if Mary herself hadn`t already started going out with Roman Rotherhide.
`I am not going to sit it that.` Lily put her hands on her hips. `That`s an absolute fire hazard.`
`Ah, don`t fret Evans,` Sirius waved a lazy hand. `Banged some spells together so it`s fire repellent– nothing to worry about.`
`Oh sure - that sounds comforting.` Lily nodded sarcastically.
`Oi!` Sirius yapped indignantly. `Little more confidence in my magical abilities if you please.`
`Hmm, yeah, because you`ve got such a clean record.` Lily narrowed her eyes. `When has banging some spells together ever worked in your favour, Black?`
Remus, who was sitting a little distance away, chuckled to himself. `That`s what I`ve been saying all evening.`
Lily took one last look at the construction, shaking her head pitifully as she sat down next to Remus. Remus` face was illuminated by the warm glow of the fire, making the roughed scars crisscrossing his skin stand out even starker. He was smoking and staring into the fire, his eyes reflecting the amber flames.
`Having a good time?` she asked, bumping her leg into his.
`Hmm.` Remus shrugged ambiguously. `Fine - I guess.`
`Are you nervous about the, erm…you know.` she said, lowering her voice - hinting at the upcoming full moon.
Remus took his eyes off the fire and up to the sky, perceiving the almost perfect silver disc decoration the velvet blue. `Not more so than usual.` He fidgeted with the cuff of his jumper, jigging his leg up and down.
Now that Lily knew about Remus, it was much easier to see the telltale signs. Remus appeared to get more testy and agitated as the moon waxed; almost as if he was containing himself inside a skin that was becoming gradually too small.
Lily chewed on her lower lip, debating on whether or not to speak. `Please, stop me if it makes you uncomfortable,` she said, very softly. `But…can I ask you a question?`
`S`pose so.`
`Alright,` Lily inhaled slowly. `Erm…where do they…where do you go…when it…when it happens?`
Remus tensed and sat up straighter, clasping his hands together, his knuckles turning white.
`If you don`t want to answer that`s totally alright.` Lily said nervously.
`No,` Remus shook his head. `It`s fine. Erm, you know that old abandoned house…in Hogsmeade.`
`The Shrieking Shack you mean?` Lily frowned.
`Yeah, the erm,` Remus swallowed. `Shrieking Shack, we`ll they…` Remus pursed his lips.
Lily`s eyes widened. `Gosh, I`m so sorry, Remus.`
`Oh no, it`s fine.` Remus shook his head. `Better than a cage, eh?`
Lily chuckled nervously - not really thinking it was funny in the slightest. She had suspected something of the sort - certainly after the thing that Severus had told her last term.
Gazing at the fire, she rested her head on his shoulder, whishing away the moon in the sky.
*
Saturday November 6th 1976
`Who would have thought? Us two to going to Hogsmeade together.` James smirked, raking a hand through his messy hair.
`Shut up, Potter.` Lily replied, glancing over her shoulder to make sure that their flock of students was still following.
`I mean…` James said. `Because last month I evaded my prefect duties, and now I`m here.`
`Yeah, right. That`s what you were talking about.` Lily tutted.
`What else could I be talking about?` James held up his hands in defiance.
`As long as you don`t get any bright ideas into that head of yours.`
`All my ideas are bright.` James wiggled his eyebrows at her, making them peek out above his spectacles like two little caterpillars.
`Straighten your tie and tuck your shirt in correctly – we`re supposed to set an example.` Nevertheless, Lily couldn`t help but smile a little.
Surprisingly enough, she and James had been getting along rather well; in the sense that, beside some minor jinxes and a ton of bickering, no serious hexes had been thrown around between them.
At the beginning of September, Lily had thought that having James around as the other prefect, would`ve turned out to be the nightmare of a lifetime. Conversely, it had proved not to be as bad as she`d presumed it to be. He was never late, never ditched patrol, and actually seemed to enjoy being a mentor to the younger students. At Halloween and Bonfire Night, he hadn`t even touched a drop of alcohol. It was odd seeing him being this responsible; it was in complete desynchronization with the image Lily had of him.
That which was even more surprising was the fact that, since the start of term, the tally on the wall of their dorm room hadn`t gone up by even one single stripe. Lily was still terrified that at any given moment James might spring something on her; pull a silly stunt to impress or woo her. She hadn`t forgiven him for the countless occasions on which he`d ignored her rejections. Maybe, after all these years, she`d finally been able to get through to him, and make him see that she had no interest in him whatsoever.
`Alright!` James boomed as they entered onto the town square. `Can we have everyone`s attention please!` His voice was loud and carried a lot further than Lily`s - probably as a result of his position as quidditch captain. Lily was surprised that he hadn`t brought his whistle.
`We want all of you back here by four o`clock.` Lily took over, addressing the students. `Couple reminders: the forbidden forest is still off limits, the-`
Some boys in the back had started to muck about and whisper amongst eachother, drowning her out.
`Oi, listen to what she`s telling you!` James hollered, instantly silencing the boys.
`Thanks.` Lily mouthed and completed her speech.
Being a prefect was not always easy; certainly not when some of the students she was supposed to look out for didn`t take her seriously.
`You should bring your whistle next time.` Lily said jokily as she and James were headed to the pub in pursuit of joining the rest of their group.
`Oh, but I already did.` James grinned and pulled something out of his robes, showing her a polished referee whistle.
Lily shook her head and laughed. `My God.`
///