Fifth Year, Kiss with a Fist
Wednesday March 10th 1976
It was yet another rainy day and yet another sixteenth birthday; this time Remus`. There was a party planned for him that evening in the common room, though, Remus knew nothing about this. It was supposed to be a surprise. Mary had aided Lily in writing and handing out the invitations. Together they had even been able to secure some real-life fairies for decoration purposes. Generally, Lily was extremely apposed to large gatherings in the common room, especially if there was to be alcohol involved, however, everyone knew she had a soft spot for Lupin.
Remus` plate was piled high with a stack of golden toast, one for every spread available. He was still rather pink in the face from the serenade he`d had to sit through; James and Sirius had conducted the entire hall in a chorus of happy birthday. The Slytherins had just glared menacingly, picking at their breakfasts.
As usual, Mary was sitting on Sirius` lap, overlooking the Gryffindor table as a queen on her royal throne. Sirius was already decked out in his red flying kit.
Marlene looked rather glum as she stared at the misty enchanted ceiling above them. `Do we have to, Potter?` She scrunched up her pointy nose and raised a palm as if expecting a raindrop to come crashing down on it.
`Yes, if we want to win that cup.` James raised his eyebrows and poured Marlene another large cup of coffee, scooting it towards her over the table. `And again, after last bell, before the…you-know-what.` He gave Marlene a conspiratory wink.
`Smooth, Potter.` Marlene cocked an eyebrow and obediently sipped on her coffee.
Mary took that as her cue to leave. `Right, I`ve got to get to the library.` She mounted off Sirius` lap. `Got to hand that Divination book back before Price calls to have me hung, drawn and quartered.`
Sirius was still clinging on to her hips, looking up at her with those icy blue eyes. `See you after second quidditch?`
`Nah,` she replied. `I`m really behind on History, thought I`d drop in on one of Remus` classes.` She smiled brightly at Remus.
`Study sessions.` Remus said pointedly.
`Whatever you say, Professor Lupin.` She smirked and raised her eyebrows.
`Oi,` Sirius tugged at her skirt urgently, trying to get her attention. `I thought you were going to sit in the quidditch stands and do your homework?`
`Well, I said I might.` Mary tugged herself loose from his grip, a little annoyed. `But it`s bloomin` freezing out today, and Remus is really good at explaining--`
`Fine.` Sirius loftily flipped his hair over his shoulder and crossed his arms. `Do whatever you like, I don`t care.`
`Oi, don`t start with me, Mr Black.` Mary tutted, knitting her brow. `You`ll lose, I promise.`
Sirius ignored her and looked out in front of him, is eyes glued on a spot in the distance.
`Kiss me goodbye, then?` She jutted out her hip and placed a hand atop it.
When Sirius didn`t as much as stir Mary stomped her foot aggravated on the flagstones. `Fine.` She kissed her teeth. `I`ll see you when I bloody well see you.`
Rapidly she turned on her heel and stormed off, hands balled into fists, her long sharp fingernails permeating the soft beds of her palms. Who did he think he was ordering her around? It was her own bloody right to pick whether or not she wanted to freeze her tits off just so she could see her boyfriend fly around on a broom. He talked too much about quidditch as it was already.
Mary was so engulfed in her indignation that she didn`t hear the footsteps following her, and it was already too late when she did notice. A rough arm pushed her up against the wall, gripping her shoulder, the thick fingers burrowing into the fabric of her blouse.
`Mulciber.` Mary hissed through gritted teeth, his arm pushing on her throat. Swiftly, she pulled her wand from her pocket, ready to strike.
The burly Slytherin slammed her arm against the wall, making her wand clattered to the floor. Possibly, Mulciber wasn`t the brightest or most gifted wizard, but he had the upper hand when it came down to pure bodily mass and strength.
`No blood traitor boyfriend to protect you now, eh?` Mulciber hissed. His breath was hot against her face and smelled sour.
`Let go of me.` Mary squirmed underneath his weight. Her eyes skittered feverishly from left to right, there was no one else in the corridor except them.
Mulciber picked up one of her curls with the tip of his wand and dropped it again, his other arm still pressing down on her throat. `For a filthy mudblood you sure are a pretty one.`
Mary turned her face to the side, trying to block out what was happening. She kept writhing, but his grip didn`t loosen and it was hard to breathe properly with him pressing down on her.
`Y`know…` Mulciber lowered his voice even more. `We`ve actually got a bet going on, who will be the first one to—Argh! You fucking, you-`
In a wave of accumulated strength, Mary had been able to headbutt Mulciber, whose hands quickly shot up to his forehead in surprise. For good measure, she kneed him hard in his groin, making him teeter back and double over in pain. As quick as her trembling limbs would allow her to, Mary scrambled for her wand and ran as fast as she could, not daring to look back.
`You`ll pay for this!` Mulciber hollered after her, pain and anger cutting through his voice.
Mary didn`t stop running until she`d reached the library. Her forehead hurt and she could feel tears burning behind her eyes. Quietly, she pushed back the tears and the hurt and levelled her breathing. There was no use in getting upset over this.
The day bore on as any other day and she didn`t tell anyone about her altercation with Mulciber. They would be angry, want revenge, or possibly, and even worse, they would pity her. Mary didn`t need pity.
They had all been assigned tasks for the party. Hers was to keep Remus occupied so he wouldn`t go up to his dorm.
`The things is,` she pondered out loud. `Sirius and I just both have such fiery personalities, y`know? In Witch Weekly it says that means our relationship is very passionate.` She was chatting while painting her nails a vibrant shade of red.
`Mm.` Remus hummed, not looking up from his homework, clearly not that interested.
`And obviously, passion is really good, in a relationship.` She blew on her nails. `I mean…it`s really good, that side of things.` Images of Sirius` hands and lips all over her flashed though her mind. `But he needs to learn that I have a my own life, you know? I mean, it`s the seventies!`
`Yeah, great.` Remus nodded as if he hadn`t heard a word of what she`d said.
`I just don`t understand how he can be so nice one minute and totally rubbish the next. Why does he do that?`
A tawny blond boy appeared at Remus` side, wanting something from him to do with Astronomy.
`Remus?` Mary asked, bending over his work. `Are you listening to me? I asked if you know why Sirius-`
Another person joined them, asking Remus for a cigarette.
`Remus?` Mary pressed again. `Can you-`
`Just- can everybody please be quiet?!` Remus suddenly spat. Everybody fell quiet. `Er…I`ve got a headache.` he mumbled. `I`m going for a lie down.`
Mary quickly got up and grabbed his arm. `Oooh! You can`t! Sorry, Remus, but the lads are up there planning…er…I mean making…er…I mean.` She bit her lip, realising her mistake. `I was supposed to keep you down here…`
Remus closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. `Ok, I`ll go to the hospital wing, then.`
Mary felt incredibly guilty. Remus almost never had outburst like this; not in front of her at least. He looked like he was in a lot of pain.
`Let me come with you then?` she pleaded, wanting to be supportive.
`I`ll be fine on my own.` He jerked his arm back and hurried away.
Mary was left with the blond boy, who looked like he might just start crying. Kissing her teeth she sank back down in her chair, the nail varnish bottle still open on the desk, next to Remus` homework. Tiredly, she rubbed her forehead, it was tender to the touch and it felt like a gnarly bruise was forming beneath the surface; better cover that up before the party.
***
`Everything hurts.` Marlene groaned as she lowered herself down to her bed. Her flying kit was damp with sweat and sticking to her skin.
`Better get this down you then.` Mary handed her a bottle of Witches Brew. `Helps with all kinds of hurt.` She raised her eyebrows.
Marlene stared at it hesitantly; flashbacks from the last time she`d drank it flooding her mind. She shook her head and scrunched up her nose.
`All the more for me.` Mary grinned and unscrewed the bottle, taking a swing from the bright green liquid.
`Safe to assume you and Black haven`t made up then?` Marlene asked as she lay her body to rest, her lower back feeling like someone was jabbing at it with a stick.
`Nope,` Mary replied, sucking her teeth. `And y`know what? I don`t care. He can be as much of a wanker as he wants. I won`t let it get me down.`
`Hurray!` Marlene rejoiced sarcastically, pumping a fist in the air. Her arm hurt as well.
They had practiced twice that day. As the quidditch final stuck its head above the horizon, James was getting more and more antsy about wanting to win the cup. Marlene did get it, obviously she wanted to win the cup as much as he did, though, there was a limit to her abilities, and she felt like she might just have reached it. The training itself hadn`t even been all that bad. However, Sirius had been incredibly mopey in light of his fight with Mary. So much in fact that he`d completely lost focus and flown into the other players multiple times, her included. Marlene almost hoped that Mary and Sirius would kiss and make up just so she wouldn`t get hit by a rouge bat again.
`Are you wearing that?` Lily came out of the bathroom, a frown decorating her forehead. She was wearing a maroon mini skirt and high wedge sandals.
`No, of course not.` Marlene replied. `I reek of sweat.`
`Then why aren`t you dressed?` Lily put her hands on her hips and tapped her foot impatiently on the floor. `We`re supposed to surprise Remus. Bit hard if you`re not dressed!`
`Aye, easy, Lil,` Marlene heaved herself upright, wincing. `If I pop in and out of the shower, I`ll be as fresh as a daisy. Just be a sec.` She plastered a smile on her face and disappeared into the bathroom.
Within minutes she was showered and dressed, standing in the middle of the common room, ready to surprise Remus. Marlene would never want someone to throw her a surprise party; it`d scare the living daylight out of her. The party had a huge turnout, students from almost every house had shown up to Gryffindor tower. Marlene couldn`t grasp why the marauders always needed to make such a big fuss out of everything. They had never thrown a huge party in the common room for her birthday.
`HAPPY BIRHTDAY REMUS!` The common room chanted in unison as Remus entered Gryffindor tower.
Remus smiled and gasped, looked mildly surprised, though, not all that convincing. Marlene had the rising suspicion that he`d known about it all along. She hobbled along behind Lily and Mary to congratulate Remus.
It was incredibly loud in the common room. Music was being blasted from a set of huge speakers and everybody seemed to be talking at a higher volume than usual. The decorations were colourful and vibrant, almost hurting her eyes.
Mary and Lily immediately wanted to dance, but Marlene felt ravenous and grabbed a sandwich from a nearby table, making it disappear in three big bites, washing it down with some punch. The punch had a weird smell to it and Marlene understood a wee bit too late that it was probably alcoholic. As she was gobbling down her third sandwich, someone leaned up against the wall next to her; Dirk Cresswell, yet again.
``Lo McKinnon,` Dirk grinned, looking her up and down. `Looking fit.`
Marlene swallowed the last bite of her food and wiped the corner of her mouth clean, chasing it with another cupful of the foul tasting punch.
`You really wash up nice if you`re not in your quidditch robes - should do that more often.` He licked his lips.
`Go feck yerself.` Marlene replied dryly and danced herself towards her friends.
The dull and languid vibrations of the bass surged through Marlene`s bones as she made her way through the mass of moving bodies, dodging arms and legs. Mary and Lily were dancing in the middle of the crowd. One of Mary`s hand was pressed to her chest, as if checking for a pulse, while the other went high up in the air, extended like a beacon, like a lighthouse, blinding everyone around it with its radiance. Mary had the sort of radiance that made everything around her seem brighter, instead of casting it in shadows. The world seemed to move in slow motion as Marlene made her way towards her friends. She couldn`t help but stare at the way the light cascaded off Mary`s face; her eyes closed in reverence, a soft smile playing on her lips as she moved her head from side to side, bouncing her tight ringlets of hair.
Marlene almost hadn`t noticed that she`d reached them, startling slightly when Lily extended a hand and pulled her into their circle. She didn`t stop staring at Mary, it was impossible to look away. Mary looked back and smiled brightly, unaware of the throughs racing through her friends head.
Lily said something, but her voice was lost by the music. She shimmied away, red hair bouncing. The song changed, the rhythm changed, and Mary grabbed Marlene`s hand, her fiery red nails glimmering in the light. Marlene closed her eyes and let herself be spun around endlessly. Time seemed to slow, loop in on itself. For a few short moments it felt like it was only the two of them in the room. When Marlene opened her eyes, her forehead was almost touching Mary`s, she could count the dark freckles splattered across the bridge of her nose. Once again she was reminded of the time in third year, behind the tapestry. How much had changed since then; how little all the same.
Mary slung her arms around Marlene`s neck and leaned in closer. Marlene`s eyes shot down to the soft bow of Mary`s upper lip. For a split second, Marlene thought she might kiss her. Hope surged up in her chest, burning so hard that it was almost painful. But then Mary whispered in her ear, `I see Sirius coming down the stairs.`
As if struck by lightning, Marlene pulled away, feeling suddenly sober. `Oh.` She blinked, the lights no longer radiant, but penetrating.
Mary took her arms away from Marlene`s shoulders and moved to the side so Sirius could properly see her. Quietly Marlene magicked herself away, still feeling the heat of Mary`s breath on her face, and the feel of her smooth skin against hers. She wanted to find Lily, or Remus.
A cheer went up in the common room. As Marlene turned to look, she was met with the unpleasant sight of Sirius pushing Mary up against the mantelpiece, snogging her so fiercely that it seemed as if their bodies were merging into one and the same. Sirius` hands were placed on Mary`s hips, his fingers digging into her as if he was trying to prove himself.
Marlene felt sick. To solve it she decided to make herself forget by finding the nearest bowl of punch and drinking three cups in quick succession. The less she would remember of all of this the better. In vain she tried to search for Lily or Remus again.
The music continued, the laughter continued, and Marlene supposed she must have drifted off, because when she rose from the chair she`d situated herself in, the clock read two and the crowd had considerably diminished. She groaned; it was a school night.
Stumbling, she made her way up the stairs, clutching the banister. She wanted nothing more than to get to bed, or the floor, whichever one came first. Their dorm room was dark, but the lights in the loo were on. Marlene heard someone coughing and found Lily hanging over the toilet; she looked up as Marlene entered, her eyes bloodshot and puffy.
`I didn`t know there was any alcohol in that punch.` Lily cried, slurring her speech, before boaking into the toilet bowl. `We`ve got school tomorrow!`
Marlene crouched down next to Lily on the cold bathroom tiles and held her hair up from her face so it wouldn`t get soiled. `What made you find out?`
It took Lily a minute to answer. `I- I-` she spluttered, crying. Then she burst out, `I snogged Dirk Cresswell!` She chucked up again, with vigour.
***
Thursday March 11th 1976
In all fairness, the punch had tasted somewhat suspicious, but it had also been sweet and thirst-quenching, so Lily hadn`t had any trouble at all getting it down her throat. It had only been after she`d realised it had gotten a bit hard to walk in her platform sandals, that she`d started to suspect something foul at play. Lily had never been drunk before and she`d never thought she would be getting drunk, ever. Especially not on a school night! Though, once she`d lost some of her inhibitions, all of her others seemed to have gone out of the window as well. Before she had any say in it she was drinking straight from a bottle of Witches Brew, cheered on by Mary, who`d just downed an entire one on her own. Where Marlene had been at this point, Lily could not remember.
After the Witches Brew, things became a bit hazy in her recollection. She remembered that someone had put on ABBA and that she`d taken to the dance floor. There was a bit where she`d mounted a desk; that was where things really had started going awry.
At first, James had wanted to join her, even more pissed than she was, but she`d pushed him off, getting upset and annoyed. Then, she remembered getting very hot and needing some air. How she`d gotten there exactly she didn`t know, but somehow she`d ended up on the stairs towards the boys` dorms, crying. About what? She couldn`t remember for the life of her. At some point, Dirk Cresswell must have had to come up the stairs. Surprised at finding her, he`d halted in his step and sat down. Lily truly didn`t remember how exactly it had all gone down, though, one moment Dirk was comforting her, and the next they were snogging.
To say it had been bad would have been an understatement. Lily was actually kind of glad she didn`t remember most of it. However, she did remember how thick and sluggish his tongue had felt in her mouth, the stale taste of fags and alcohol, and how sweaty his hands had been on her skin.
Realising her mistake, she`d instantly bolted and gone up to her own dorm. Though, not before she`d thrown a quilt over Sirius and Mary, who had been asleep on the couch. The rest of the night she`d spend hunched over the toilet bowl, spilling her guts, and then some more.
When she roused, she was laying on the bathroom floor next to the toilet. Apparently Marlene had made the effort put a blanket over her, but it was covered in something foul smelling. Marlene herself lay on top of her duvet, still wearing her shoes, the curtains wide open.
Lily lifted her head, a throb spreading all the way from the back of her skulls to her eyes. If this was what Marlene and Remus had to go through every time they had a migraine than Lily didn`t envy them in the slightest. Slowly she rose, feeling bile rise up in the back of her throat. Surely there was nothing left in her stomach anymore. She vowed to never, ever, drink again. It only brought trouble and unthinking decisions. Mary would have a field day if she were to find out that she`d snogged Cresswell. Lily hoped Dirk wouldn`t tell anyone, or had forgotten the whole thing.
The clock read a quarter to six; still some time until classes would start. Lily considered crawling into bed, but when she caught a whiff of her own stench, she decided against it. What she needed was a thorough bath. Hence, she decided to head to the prefect`s bathrooms. As gently as she could, she removed Marlene`s shoes, put a quilt over her, and shut the curtains to block out any light that might come into the room as the sun rose. She filled a glass with water and put it on Marlene`s bedside table. It was a miracle that she slept soundly through all of this.
Lily slipped out of her clothes, into her bathing suit and pink dressing gown, before quietly heading down stairs. Mary and Sirius were still asleep on the couch; her head burrowed into his chest, his arm protectively around her back. How nice, Lily thought, they made up. The first rays of sunshine were already staring to pool into the common room, revealing the mess of the previous night.
Almost the entire castle was still asleep, her footsteps were thunderous in comparison to the otherwise deadly quiet. Lily hoped fervently she wouldn`t bump into someone, trotting around in her dressing gown like this.
The prefect`s bathroom was password protected, with a quick `squeaky clean` Lily was able to open the door. The sight of the gorgeous bathroom never seized to amaze her, she took a couple of seconds to gaze around in awe. The tiles consisted of white marble and the golden taps were polished to perfection, reflecting the soft light that emanated though the stained glass windows. The large colourful windows were laid in with various mystical sea creatures. A siren waved at her from her across the water, her long golden locks glimmering in the early morning sunlight, a serene smile playing on her lips.
Suddenly, Lily`s gaze was torn away from the windows by the sound of spluttering and coughing rising up from the enormous bath. She spotted a couple of long arms and legs flailing about in the water, gripping feverishly around themselves in the foam. Her heart skipped a beat and she would have been ready to jump in and save whoever was in trouble, if it wasn`t that at that moment a familiar head emerged above the surface.
`Remus, is that you!?` Lily called out in alarm, her voice echoing against the stone. She rushed over to the edge of the tub.
While still couching up water, Remus clumsily wiped his dripping mop of hair from his face. He rubbed his eyes and stared up at her, his head bopping comically above the foam, the rest of his body invisible.
`Hiya, Lily.`
`Christ, are you ok?` Lily breathed. `Thought I`d have to dive in and save you there!`
`Lost my balance.` Remus replied, still sounding waterlogged.
`I can`t believe you beat me to a bath.` Lily rubbed her forehead, which hadn`t stopped pounding. `Thought I`d be the first person up. Got a filthy headache.`
`Yeah that punch was pretty strong.` Remus nodded unenthusiastically. `I was just getting out…` he faltered and looked hesitant. `Er…do you mind turning around?`
Lily nodded and smiled. `Oh, ok…sorry!` she turned to look the other way, surveying the windows again.
She heard Remus clamber out of the tub, the water and suds sloshing onto the sides, his wet footsteps padding over the tiles, the shuffle of a towel.
`Ok.` Remus` voice said after a while.
When she rotated around, Remus had already disappeared into a changing cubicle. Lily turned on the taps, filling the tub with clean water, infusing it with lavender soap. As the bathroom filled itself with the heady floral scent, Lily could already feel some of the tension releasing from her neck and shoulders.
`So where did you disappear off to last night?` she asked over the noise of the taps. `We must have gone on to at least two, Potter was so pissed.` James` frantic dance moves replayed in her mind and she grinned to herself.
`Must have got a bit too drunk.` Remus` voice came out of the cubicle. `Went to bed at midnight.`
Lily chuckled, stripping down to her bathing suit and pilling her hair atop her head. `Lightweight.` She turned off the taps, quiet descending on the large clean space. `Still, at least Sirius and Mary made up, eh?` Gently she lowered herself into the water, the warmth sinking into her muscles. The bubbles were thick and purple, clinging to her skin as a small bank of clouds.
Remus came out of his stall. `Yeah, that was lucky.`
Lily swam slowly back and forth, easing her muscles one by one, the pain draining out of her head almost instantly. Remus was dawdling at the edge of the tub, fully clothed, looking somewhat uncomfortable. She cast him an amused smile, waiting for him to speak first.
`Library.` he finally nodded.
`Of course.` she chuckled lightly. `Where else?` She moved some bubbles around. `Oh, did you see that notice in the common room?`
`No.` Remus frowned and shook his head slowly.
`Career meetings with McGonagall have been posted – mid-April.`
`Oh good. Thanks.` Remus nodded and rubbed the back of his neck.
With that, Remus finally left and Lily was left in the solitude of the shining white marble and the mass of purple suds bobbing tranquilly around her. With ease she glided onto her back, letting the water carry her, rising off the night.
///