Fifth Year, January
Sunday January 4th 1976
The rain that had tormented the Christmas holidays drew on into the New Year without halting or even faltering. King`s Cross was a sopping wet mess full of hurrying travellers, all cowering against the dreadful January wind. Lily had already pinned her prefect`s badge on the front of her robes; ready to step right back into position now the second term was commencing. As a prefect it was her duty to patrol the train corridors during the journey to Hogwarts; making sure that nothing out of the ordinary went down.
As usual, Severus had hitched a ride with her and her parents to the station. However, as soon as they`d gone through the barrier onto platform 9 ¾, he`d disappeared into the mass of students; probably because he didn`t want to be seen with her in front of all his pureblood friends. Lily was relieved, as she equally didn`t want to be seen with him in front of her own friends.
Mary was tapping the heel of her blue suede boots impatiently on the ground, her hands perched on her hips, shooting regular glances at the brick barrier.
`Can`t we go inside?` Marlene pleaded, wiping a strand of fair hair from her eyes. `My socks are getting wet.`
`No, I want to wait for Sirius.` Mary replied, steadfast. `You can go in if you want, we`ll catch up with you. Maybe you can secure us a car.`
Marlene glared at Mary, but bit her lip and apparently decided it was best not to counter her.
Lily shot her friend an apologetic look. `I`m sorry but I can`t go in before I`ve met up with Remus.` She peered in the same direction as Mary, hoping that the boys would soon appear. She knew that both Remus and Sirius had been staying with the Potter`s, so they should be arriving as a unit.
Before the break, a Hufflepuff prefect had been ambushed by a couple of ill meaning Slytherins while out on patrol late one night; only to be found the next morning in absolute distress. Hence, to avoid another one of these altercations, the prefects were now prohibited from going out on their own. Lily wasn`t sure if this rule also applied for patrols on the train, though, it couldn`t do any harm to pair up with Remus either way.
Suddenly Mary perked up and pointed. `There they are!`
`Finally.` Marlene sighed and uncrossed her arms.
The three boys were leisurely making their way towards them. Remus and James looked pretty much the same as they had two weeks before, however, Sirius looked like a completely different person. He was stomping his was through the crowd in a pair of chunky black bovver boots; his long hair was flipped over to one side; and as cherry on top, he actually had a golden earring dangling from one of his lobes. Marlene gave a snort and elbowed Lily, indicating with her eyes at the earring. Yet, Mary was evidently very pleased with Sirius` new attire and tottered towards him in her heels.
`Hiya, gorgeous.` Mary flung her arms around Sirius.
Lily gave Remus a friendly smile, too self-conscious to hug him, and lifted her eyebrows at a bright beaming James. Marlene didn`t leave it up to fate to get inside and towed James and Remus along; all the while chatting animatedly about her Christmas, completely ignoring Sirius and Mary who were getting reacquainted rather obnoxiously.
They marched the length of the corridor until they`d found their usual carriage and settled down contently out of the rain. Peter was already waiting from them, accompanied by Desdemona. Immediately upon seeing his friends, Peter started to pelt them with questions about their Christmases. It struck Lily as odd that Peter had been the only one of the four marauders that hadn`t spent the winter break at the Potter`s. She hoped he wasn`t feeling left out by his friends.
As the train set in motion, Lily stood up and looked expectantly at Remus. He was still staring at the platform, his face drawn as he picked at a loose string on his jumper. It looked like he was put out by something; or maybe just tired.
`Want to do the patrols with me?` she asked, shaking him out of his ponderings.
`Huh, what?` Remus looked up. `Oh, yeah.` He nodded and gave her a small smile.
Lily slid the carriage door open and waited for Remus to step over the threshold before she closed it behind them again. The corridor was mostly empty; almost everyone had found a seat on the train.
`You looked like you needed some air.` she said.
`Yeah, cheers.` Remus replied. `Stuffy in there.` He rubbed the back of his neck.
`Full on Christmas with the marauders, then?` she peered at him questioning.
`You can say that again.` he sighed.
`Poor Remus.` He looked like he desperately needed a hug; he probably didn`t get enough of those. Lily coupled her arm in his and leaned into his tall frame. Remus was all corners and angles and it was very easy to mould herself to him.
The hallway was quiet; only the laughter of students dribbling out of the various cars. The raindrops clattered gently against the windows of the train, mingling with the rhythm of the wheels.
`I heard about Sirius.` she said, keeping her voice low. `Is he ok?`
After Severus had told her about Sirius` disinheritance, she`d written to Mary asking her if she knew more about it. But Mary hadn`t known about it at all; which Lily though was rather odd, seeing as she was his girlfriend after all. So, initially Lily had thought that Severus had made it all up for some reason. That was until she`d seen him on the platform in his bovver boots.
`Yeah.` Remus nodded slowly. `Think so,` he looked down at her, `How did you know?`
`Er…` she faltered. `Sev told me, actually. I didn`t believe him, but based on Sirius` new look…`
`Fuck.` Remus rubbed the back of his neck again. `How does he know?`
Lily shrugged; she`d asked the same exact question. He couldn`t possibly have been at the fateful party, right?
`Does everyone know?`
`Only that he`s been kicked out.` she replied. `And disinherited. Nobody knows why.` She looked expectedly at Remus, hoping he would tell her.
He sighed and looked away. `It`s complicated. I don`t think he wants everyone to know.`
Lily gave him an understanding nod and rubbed his arm gently. `You`re a good friend.`
At that moment, her attention was pulled away by something in front of them.
`Oi!` she boomed, directing her wand at the person on the other end of the corridor. `If that`s you, Crouch, I`ll have your guts for garters…`
She`d given up on trying to keep count of how many times she`d caught Barty Crouch doing something he wasn`t supposed to be doing. This time, he was levitating the bags of some scared-looking first year girls. He snarled at Lily, but dropped his wand, and with it the bags.
The compartment door on their left opened and someone stuck their head out. `Barty, what are you – oh.` Regulus stared at Lily and Remus; his eyes turned to slits. `What do you want, Evans?`
`No need to be so rude,` she reprimanded him. `Stay out of trouble, or I`ll be speaking with Slughorn. You`re on thin ice already and you know it.` She wagged a finger at Crouch. `C`mon, Remus.` She jerked her head and implored him to follow along.
However, Remus dawdled in front of Regulus.
`Lupin.` Regulus said, his voice much softer than it had been moments ago. The younger Black brother opened and closed his mouth a couple of times without saying anything.
`He`s fine.` Remus said hurriedly.
Regulus` eyes widened momentarily before he slammed the carriage door shut with a bang.
`That was nice of you.` Lily said as she linked her arm in Remus` again. `I`m sure he appreciates it.` It was odd really how this sudden misfortune concerning Sirius had made her see him in a softer light.
***
Wednesday January 7th 1976
The idea of possibly becoming a healer had been all fun and games until Marlene had discovered that she would need to have at least five OWLs and N.E.W.Ts in Charms, Defence Against the Dark Arts, Herbology, Potions and Transfiguration to even qualify. She was pretty sure that she wouldn’t have any problems in securing an OWL in Herbology and Defence Against the Dark Arts, however, the other three classes were cut out of quite different wood. While Potions and Charms were challenging in their own way, Transfiguration wasn`t her strongest course by a long shot, and she refused to ask Sirius to help her out.
Lucky for her, after the winter break, a group of avid students seemed to have accumulated themselves around Remus; creating a study group that got together in the Gryffindor common room at regular intervals. It was the perfect opportunity to exchange notes with students she would never have come into contact with otherwise. Remus appeared to have taken his role as their leader with grace. The other marauders were making fun of him for it, calling him the professor, but Marlene thought it was actually quite admirable. He had a natural authority that radiated outwards; without ever making someone feel less for not understanding something.
Outside of her immediate friend group, Marlene almost never talked to anyone else. She didn`t really mind not having that much friends. During quidditch practice she was amicable with the other players, though, she didn`t really consider them her friends, besides James, and maybe Sirius, but that was debatable.
This given made that she was rather surprised and almost startled when someone sat down next to her during one of these study sessions.
`Is this seat taken?`
Marlene looked up into the face of a tawny fair haired boy. She`d seen him around, he was in the year below them, though, she couldn`t quite remember his name.
`Erm…no.` She shook her head and moved her books to the side, making space on the desk.
The boy smiled gratefully and started to unload his overpacked satchel. Marlene continued jotting down notes on anti-vanishment spells; her quill was nearing its end and it scratched dryly on the parchment. It didn`t take long before the tip of her quill broke off completely. She didn`t have any spare quills anymore. Normally, she would ask Lily or Mary if she could borrow one of theirs, but neither of them were there right now. Well…Mary was, but she was engaged with Sirius in spit swapping, and Marlene would rather die than interrupt them. She could ask Remus, but he was practicing levitation Charms with a group of first years, and Marlene didn`t want to be a nuisance.
There was nothing other to do but ask the boy who sat next to her. It was easy enough; could I borrow a quill? Really it was extremely straightforward. Just spit it out already; she scolded herself inwardly. Her underarms were starting to sweat and her stomach twisted in various knots. Could I borrow a quill? Or should she say; may I borrow a quill? Maybe that was too formal. Should she add a please?
`Do you need a quill?`
`Huh?` Marlene snapped her head up from her hands that were still holding the broken quill. `Aye, cheers.` She smiled bashfully, feeling extremely embarrassed, her cheeks red and burning. Carefully she took the quill the boy was offering to her.
`I`m Christopher, by the way.` the boy nodded. `Don`t know if you knew that, maybe you did, though, I never introduced myself. S`pose you could have known, but then again…` he rambled on.
`I`m Marlene.` Marlene replied quickly and smiled at him; grateful not to be the only one who wasn`t as socially versed as the rest of the entire bleeding world.
`I know.` Christopher nodded. `You`re on the quidditch team.`
`Och, aye, of course.` Marlene shook her head; sometimes she forgot she was in fact not invisible.
They both settled back into their studies. After a while, Marlene was pulled out of her concentration by a high pitched giggle and looked up to see Sirius tickling Mary`s sides. She clenched her jaw and angrily flicked at a loose piece of skin on her index finger. When she noticed that Christopher was looking at her sideways, she quickly relaxed her face and buried her head back into her textbook.
`Hey,` Christopher whispered after a while. `Do you, erm… do you…`
Marlene looked at the fourth year boy who had started to turn a scarlet red. She raised her eyebrows, willing him to go on.
`Do you know if Remus is seeing anyone?`
`Remus?` Marlene frowned confused. `Don`t think so. Not that I know of at least.` Why on earth would this boy need to know if Remus was seeing someone, did this dating shite never stop?
`Are you sure?` Christopher pressed. `No, girls he spends a lot of time with? Or, no, erm, no…`
Marlene looked at him, irritated at why he wouldn`t finish his fecking sentences; she had homework to attend to that would do itself. Why was he seemingly under the impression that she was the right person to talk to about dating?
Christopher raised his eyebrows imploringly. `No, other person?`
Something seemed to register in Marlene`s head and her mouth dropped open, but she quickly closed it; knowing better than to make a spectacle.
`No, also no…` Marlene shook her head. `I didn`t even, I…` she stuttered. Her mind was working over hours; she had the individual pieces, though, she was yet to place them all together.
Christopher had turned even redder and he was smiling bashfully. `Good,` he nodded. `I though you might be the safest person to ask, since…well, you know.`
Marlene swallowed, a sense of dread flooding over her. `How did you…how?` Was all she managed to spit out. It was incredibly dangerous talking like this among all these people, though, nobody seemed to be paying any attention to them.
`I didn`t know for certain.` Christopher replied. `I just had an inkling. Just a…feeling, I guess.`
`You can`t tell anyone.` Marlene whispered, pleading desperately. `Promise me you won`t tell anyone. Nobody knows…and if they were to find out. If Mary…` She shot a glance at Sirius and Mary.
`I won`t.` Christopher replied so earnestly that Marlene felt almost sorry for him. `I promise I won`t.`
`So, Remus…?`
Christopher shrugged. `Also just an inkling.`
`I think I need some air.` Marlene said and pushed her chair back, almost knocking it over. She felt slightly dizzy. A couple of Gryffindors looked after her as she rushed upstairs.
Up in their dorm room, she hurriedly cracked open a window and let the freezing cold air wash over her. Mary`s cat, who was now annoyingly called Sirius, brushed against her trouser leg and miaowed woefully.
`My thoughts exactly.` Marlene replied and picked up the whinging feline.
Immediately the cat started purring and Marlene felt the vibrations in the hollow of her chest cavity; it was nice, it calmed her down somewhat.
Over the last ten minutes, she had ingested more information than she thought she was able to emotionally process. Without warning she started crying, it were tears of sadness, but maybe more so of relief. All this time she had thought she was the only one. Obviously she couldn`t have been the only one, but the thought of being able to share this experience with someone else would never have crossed her mind. However, she wasn`t, she wasn`t alone. Not really at least.
It did annoy her a wee bit that the first person to know her secret was this little blond boy she only knew the first name of, though, it was better than no one, she supposed. What had come as even more of a surprise had been that Christopher seemed to be under the impression that Remus was also queer. How did one detect such a thing? Whether he was right or not, from now on, she would pay extra attention to it.
***
Tuesday January 13th 1976
`You know he actually makes me run with him every single morning?`
`Yeah, you mentioned.` Mary replied, raking her fingers through Sirius` dark hair. `Poor you.`
They were practically the last two people left in the common room. It was well past curfew and almost everyone was already up to their dormitories. Neither of them could go up to the other`s room, so they tried to prolong the evening by staying downstairs. The fire in the hearth was burning on its last logs; glowing amber in the dim light. It was almost a full moon and the round silver disk casted its light through the large window.
`You don`t sound all that sorry, Macdonald.` Sirius opened one eye and grinned up at her. He had his head rested on her lap, the rest of his body stretched out on the squashy red couch.
`Oh, hush you.` Mary teased and put a hand over his eyes so he would stop looking at her; it made her stomach flutter.
`I thought that with Prongs as captain I wouldn`t have to work as hard,` Sirius sighed. `But he acts like a proper prison warden.`
Mary chuckled. `You lads have such bizarre names for eachother. How do you even come up with a name like Padfoot? Or Wormtail; that one is a bit mean really.`
Sirius pulled a face. `Nah, Wormy suits our Petey boy just right.. And I guess I`m just a proper Padfoot.`
`I think it`s weird.`
`Don`t you girls have nicknames?` he opened his eyes again.
`Not really.` Mary shrugged. `I call Lily, Lil or Lils, Marlene becomes Marls, sometimes Mars if I feel like it. But not completely different names.`
`Then I reckon you girls are the weird ones.` Sirius smirked.
`Careful what you say, Black.` She tugged lightly on his hair.
`Oi!`
Sirius hoisted himself upright, taking his head from her lap. He positioned himself against the back of the couch and gestured to Mary to snuggle up against his side. In turn she folded her legs underneath her body and nuzzled her head in the hollow between his shoulder and neck. They grew silent, both breathing slowly, growing sleepy in the warmth of the fire.
`Hey,` Mary said softly. `How are you doing, by the way?`
`What`d you mean?` Sirius shifted on the couch.
`Well, we haven’t really talked about it.` Mary hesitated. `But I can imagine it hasn`t been easy after what happened at Christmas.`
`Oh that.`
`Yeah, that.` Mary frowned. In fact, they hadn`t talked about it at all. All her knowledge about what had transpired that fateful night was via whisperings among the other students. Initially, she had hoped that he would come to her, but almost two weeks had gone by, and still he hadn`t uttered as much as a word about it. `You know you can talk to me.`
`I just rather not.` He looked at his delicate hands.
Mary took her head off his shoulder and looked at him intently. `I just want to be there for you. I`m your girlfriend, Sirius, we can`t not talk about these things`
`But it`s no fun.` Sirius pouted and looked back at her with his big blue eyes. A twinkle rippled over his face and he grinned. `You know what is fun?` He cocked an impish eyebrow and wiped some curls from Mary`s neck, kissing the hollow of her neck. She started giggling, but quickly regained her composure.
`No, don`t try to deflect now.` Mary pulled back. `I`m serious.`
`No, I am Sirius.` he raised his eyebrows dryly.
`That joke is way past its expiration date.` Mary frowned. `You`re not listening to me. I told you from the beginning that I don`t want to be someone you just fool around with.` To be fair, they had done little but fool around.
Sirius sank back again and crossed his arms. `Alright...,` he said. `I`ll talk about it.`
Mary looked at him expectantly, her eyes urging him to go on.
`But not know,` he looked away. `I need- I need some time, ok? It`s not- it`s not easy.`
`That`s alright.` Mary rubbed his arm. `Take you`re time; I`ll be here.`
Thursday January 15th 1976
Mary felt somewhat relieved after the talk she`d had with Sirius. He would talk to her; at some point at least. When this point would be, she didn`t know; for now they were engaged in other activities.
`Where are we going?` Mary whispered, giggling.
`Come with me.` Sirius pulled her along behind him, gripping her hand tightly in his. `You`ll see.`
`It`s past curfew. We`ll get caught.`
`I think you`re forgetting who you`re dealing with here.` Sirius looked over his shoulder and smirked impishly.
They were mounting the stairs towards the Astronomy tower; Mary tried not to stumble on the stone steps. The corridors were devoid of light and she wondered how Sirius was able to see in the dark as well as he did; she was barely able to see a foot in front of her.
At the top of the stairs Sirius halted abruptly and pulled a tapestry to the side, revealing a hollow behind it.
`Ladies first.` he said as he held the tapestry open. `Madam.`
Mary giggled, but obeyed. `Its dusty in here.` she whispered, almost sneezing.
`Shh.` Sirius hushed and pulled her in by her waist.
`Oh, so this was your devious master plan?` Their noses were almost touching. `Get me inside a broom cupboard, huh? Romantic.`
`This is no broom cupboard. This is an alcove; it`s rustic.`
`Rustic; you are absolutely right.`
Mary gripped the back of Sirius` head and kissed him; he returned her kiss with just as much vigour. His hands moved up her back and down again, sending pleasant tingles all though out her body. She put her hands on either side of his face, feeling his smooth skin beneath her palms. He was taller than she was so she had to stand slightly on her tippy toes.
`Ow, leg cramp.` she yelped as she felt her calf muscle tense up.
`Here.` Sirius pushed her back against the brick so she could relax into the stone.
He continued kissing her. His hands were now eagerly making his way to the front of her blouse, fidgeting with the top button, but not quite undoing it. Mary started giggling despite herself.
`What`s wrong?` Sirius pulled away. `Is this alright?`
`Yeah,` Mary nodded. `It`s alright.`
She couldn`t see Sirius in the dark, but she was sure she could practically hear him grin. Quickly he started to unbutton her blouse down to her navel. His fingers were cold as he grazed the skin of her torso, and Mary had to suppress another giggle.
Suddenly Sirius stopped kissing her.
`What`s wrong?`
`Shh.` Sirius put a hand in front of her mouth. `I hear footsteps.`
Mary barely dared to breath; terrified they might be discovered by one of their professors. After a couple of seconds, Mary was also able to hear the footsteps, and she heard muffled voices coming their way.
With a jerk the tapestry was pulled aside.
`Lumos!`
`Shit!` Sirius yelped as they were blinded by the light.
`Mary!` Lily`s voice let out in horror.
`Moony!` Sirius gasped.
`What are you two doing?!` Lily questioned them instantly, putting her hand on her hips and regarding them in the light of Remus` wand.
`Can`t guess, Evans?` Sirius raised an amused eyebrow, his arms still around Mary. In turn, Mary was hastily trying to rebutton her blouse; her entire bra was on display.
`We ought to give you both detention.` Lily looked sternly at Mary.
`Oh, be nice, Lily.` Mary tried to reason with her, smiling sweetly. `Every one does it, just a bit of fun.`
`Well…` Lily sighed and seemed to loose some of her stern demeanour. `As this is the first time. Come on, we`re heading back to the Tower now anyway.`
`Five more minutes.` Sirius replied, mischievously, making Mary giggle again. Lily and Remus looked both equally appalled.
`Bad boy!` Mary gave him a playful slap and did up the last button of her blouse. `C`mon, it`s not like anything else was happening tonight.`
Mary grabbed Lily by her arm and the two of them hurried out in front of the boys.
`Wasn`t it awfully stuffy behind that tapestry?` Lily whispered.
`Terribly.` Mary giggled, and cast a furtive look behind them. `He thought is was rustic. But I thought it was full of cobwebs.`
Lily chuckled. `As long as you`re having fun.`
`Oh, I`m having fun alright.` Mary smirked quietly to herself.
`Just make sure I won`t catch you at it again. That image is burnt into my retina.`
///