Project Dahlia

The mission had barely started, and chaos was already brewing.

"Okay, we're in," Cassie whispered through the comms, scanning the dimly lit hall. "How's it looking, N?"

Ned's voice crackled through. "You're good. Cameras are down for now, but don't push your luck."

"You do know who you're talking to, right?" Damian quipped, smirking as he silently took out a guard. "Pushing luck is literally our job."

"More like pushing everyone's patience," Ned muttered under his breath.

"Hey, I heard that!" Peter's voice came through as he clung to the ceiling, webbing up a couple of cameras. "We are very patient."

"Uh-huh," Penelope added, firing a web at a nearby door to seal it shut behind them. "Like the time you and Rogue decided to race through an active mission zone? Or when Robin started a fistfight with that gang leader for 'fun'?"

"I won," Damian interrupted, clearly proud of himself.

"I didn't know that being 'quiet' meant starting an explosion," Michelle's dry voice cut in. She was lurking in the shadows nearby, blending perfectly with her surroundings. "I'm just saying, one of these days, N's going to quit and leave us hanging."

Ned groaned. "No kidding. I feel like a babysitter."

"We prefer 'overseer of chaos,'" Peter suggested with a grin.

"Focus!" Damian hissed, though even he couldn't suppress the slight amusement in his voice. "We need to find that data."

Cassie was already on it, hacking into a terminal with one hand while keeping an eye on the door. "Almost got it. Just—Robin, guard incoming on your left."

Without hesitation, Damian spun, knocking the guard unconscious before he could react.

Cassie rolled her eyes.

"Guys, I'm reading a bunch of guards converging on your position," Ned's voice became tense. "You need to move now!"

Peter zipped down from the ceiling. "Got the hard drive!"

"Good, let's get out of here before things get messy," Penelope said, already moving toward the exit.

"Too late," Michelle deadpanned as the door burst open, guards flooding in.

Cassie sighed, "Looks like we're improvising, as usual."

Ned's exasperated groan echoed in their ears. "Can you guys go one mission without causing chaos?"

"Where's the fun in that?" Peter laughed, webbing a guard to the ceiling as they all sprang into action.

The fight was swift, fluid as Cassie and Damian tore through the guards with precision, while Peter and Penny swung and webbed up everything in sight. Michelle stayed in the sidelines, picking off stragglers.

"Mission complete," Cassie said as the last guard hit the ground.

Ned's exhausted voice came through the comms. "You guys are insane. Please tell me you didn't blow anything up."

Silence.

"...Guys?"

"I might have accidentally set off a minor explosion," Damian admitted, with a grin.

Ned sighed dramatically. "I quit. I'm too young for this level of stress."

"Don't worry, N," Peter said with mock seriousness. "You'll be fine. You've survived this long."

As they sprinted out of the building and back to safety, the team laughed while Ned muttered complaints about finding a new job.

As they made their way back to the jet, things hadn't calmed down.

"You left what behind?!" Ned's panicked voice came over the comms again.

"My phone," Peter said casually, leaping onto a rooftop to keep pace with Damian and Cassie, who were effortlessly parkouring through the city. "Don't worry, it's no big deal. I'll just web back and grab it."

"NO BIG DEAL?!" Ned practically shrieked. "Your phone has sensitive data on it!"

Cassie snorted, barely holding back laughter. "N, if you keep freaking out, you're going to give yourself a heart attack."

"You're not the one monitoring six government agencies right now, Rogue!"

"Oh, I think we lost one of those agencies," Penelope chimed in, her voice light and teasing as she flipped over a fence, leaving a trail of webbed guards behind her. "I mean, they can't keep up with us anyway."

"Can't lose what you didn't care about in the first place," Damian added, the smirk clear in his voice.

Ned groaned. "I seriously hate you guys."

"I thought we were your favorite group of heroes," Michelle said, smirking.

Peter laughed. "We are his favorite. Admit it, N, you love us."

"Absolutely not," Ned muttered, but it was obvious he couldn't stay mad at them for long. "I give it five minutes before something explodes again."

"More like three," Damian corrected as they slid down into an alleyway.

"Is anyone going to help me find P's phone, or am I doing this alone?" Penelope asked.

"On it," Cassie replied, pulling up a tracker on her wrist display. "You seriously need to stop leaving stuff behind, P."

"I never leave anything behind!" Peter protested, landing beside her. "Except that one time... and maybe the other time—look, it's not a big deal!"

Michelle's voice chimed in with her usual dry wit. "So, what happens if Hydra finds his phone? We can assume they'll call and ask if he's free for coffee, right?"

"Don't tempt them," Damian said. "They might actually be desperate enough to do it."

Cassie rolled her eyes. "Okay, enough. Phone found. Let's move before N spontaneously combusts."

"Too late for that," Ned grumbled in the background. "And for the record, P, I'm never covering for you again when you lose your stuff."

"I'll make it up to you," Peter promised, sprinting ahead to catch up with his phone's location. "Cookies or something."

"Yeah, cookies won't save you this time, Spider-Man," Ned said, sounding completely done with their antics. "You guys are lucky I'm this good with tech. Anyone else would've walked away from this job months ago."

"Months?!" Michelle laughed. "Nobody would survive a day working with us."

Just as Peter retrieved his phone, the building they'd been surveilling exploded. A huge fireball lit up the night sky, and the team collectively ducked behind some rubble to avoid debris.

"Oh my god," Ned groaned. "What did I say? What did I literally just say?!"

Cassie dusted off her jacket and stood up nonchalantly. "Hey, technically that wasn't us this time."

"...Technically," Damian muttered with a sly grin.

Ned's exhausted sigh came through once more. "You guys are banned from explosives. Forever."

"Good luck enforcing that," Peter said, already moving with the rest of the group as they headed for their extraction point. "We're just getting started!"

As they piled onto the jet, Cassie leaned back with a satisfied grin. "Another successful mission, if I do say so myself."

Penelope high-fived her. "Agreed. And we didn't even break anything—well, much."

Ned's voice came back, exasperated and resigned. "You guys are the definition of chaos."

Damian stretched out, looking smug. "You say that like it's a bad thing."

"It is a bad thing!"

Peter nudged Cassie, grinning. "You think Fury's going to yell at us when we get back?"

Cassie grinned back. "Oh, definitely. But we'll blame Damian."

"Why me?" Damian asked, feigning innocence.

"Because you're the main leader," Michelle said with a shrug. "And you did blow up part of that building."

"Oh, right. Fair." Damian smirked, clearly unfazed by the idea of Fury's impending rage.

Ned's final groan was the last thing they heard before the jet took off, the team laughing and teasing each other as they flew back home, leaving behind yet another trail of chaos.

Back at the safehouse, the team barely had time to settle in before the comms crackled, and Fury's voice came through. His tone was a perfect mix of anger and exasperation, a trademark whenever Project Dahlia was involved.

"Care to explain what the hell happened out there?"

Penny casually reclined on the couch, throwing a smirk over at Michelle. "We were efficient, as always."

"Efficient?" Fury's voice grew sharper. "I'm looking at a destroyed building, multiple security breaches, and a minor explosion. Tell me where 'efficient' fits into that."

Damian leaned back in his chair, totally unfazed. "Mission accomplished, sir."

"Mission accomplished?" Fury's frustration was palpable. "You guys nearly blew your cover—and the building—into oblivion. AGAIN."

Penelope stretched, sounding completely relaxed. "In our defense, the explosion wasn't entirely our fault. Mostly."

Fury's deep sigh filled the room. "I don't know how I got stuck with you kids. What am I supposed to tell the higher-ups? That Project Dahlia continues to wreak havoc but somehow gets results?"

Ned snickered in the background, clearly loving that Fury was getting more stressed by the second. "That sounds about right."

Cassie couldn't resist. "Tell them we're unpredictable. It's part of our charm."

"Charm?" Fury growled. "You think this is charming? You left a trail a mile wide. I've got the media sniffing around asking about the 'mysterious teenage vigilantes.'"

"Technically," Michelle chimed in, leaning against the wall with her arms crossed, "we're teenage SHIELD agents."

"Barely!" Fury snapped. "You're making me lose my sanity with every mission."

Peter, swinging lazily from the ceiling with a grin, piped up. "But you have to admit, we do get things done. In the most chaotic way possible, but still."

There was a long pause on the comms, the team holding back their laughter as they waited for Fury to respond.

"I'm sending you all for tactical debrief training," Fury finally said, voice stone cold. "You're going to learn discipline if it's the last thing I do."

Cassie laughed. "We've been through that before, and look at how well it worked out."

"I'm serious, Rogue," Fury warned. "One more screw-up and I'll have you scrubbing toilets at HQ."

Damian raised an eyebrow at Cassie with an amused grin. "Toilet duty, huh?"

Cassie grinned back. "I think I'll pass. Thanks, Fury, but we've got bigger things to deal with."

"I'm warning you, Prince. One more misstep—"

"Got it, sir," Damian interrupted, cutting off Cassie before she could rile Fury up any further. "We'll be on our best behavior."

"Somehow, I doubt that," Fury muttered darkly. "Leeds, make sure they don't blow up anything else."

Ned, who had been silently enjoying the chaos from the comms station, replied quickly, "Uh, yeah. About that... no promises."

Fury's sigh sounded final, as if he'd resigned himself to the team's antics. "Just get some rest. We'll debrief in the morning. And for the love of God, stay out of trouble."

As the comms cut out, Cassie stretched lazily. "So... what now?"

Peter dropped from the ceiling, grinning. "We could—"

"No," Damian said immediately, knowing exactly what Peter was about to suggest.

Peter pouted. "You don't even know what I was going to say!"

"I don't have to," Damian replied dryly. "It's always something that ends with us getting in trouble."

"Trouble is fun, though," Penelope said, throwing her feet up on the coffee table.

Michelle snorted. "I think Fury might actually lose it if we pull something tonight."

Cassie smirked. "Then we'd better make it worth it."

Ned, overhearing everything from the corner, groaned loudly. "No. Absolutely not. I am not getting involved in another one of your wild plans."

"Oh, come on, Ned," Cassie said with a mischievous glint in her eyes. "We'll be careful this time. Promise."

"That's exactly what you said before Peter dropped a building on top of us," Ned reminded her.

Peter scratched his head, looking sheepish. "Okay, yeah, but that was totally not my fault. That pillar was—uh—structurally unsound."

Damian pinched the bridge of his nose. "How do you people survive?"

"With style," Cassie shot back, grinning.

Damian sighed, leaning back into the couch. "I'm going to bed before you lot convince me to join whatever insane plan you're thinking of."

Cassie leaned over and whispered to Peter and Penelope. "He'll join us. Just give him five minutes."

"I heard that, Rogue," Damian said without even opening his eyes.

The room erupted in laughter as the chaotic team plotted their next move, knowing full well that they were Fury's worst nightmare—and loving every second of it.

The next morning, Fury called them in for the dreaded debrief. The team, still half-asleep and clearly unbothered by yesterday's antics, slouched around the conference table. Damian sat at the head of the table, looking serious as ever, while Peter, Cassie, Michelle, and Penelope seemed like they'd rather be anywhere else.

Fury strode into the room, a thick stack of files in hand. "Alright, Team. Let's talk about what went wrong yesterday."

Michelle raised a hand without hesitation, her face utterly innocent. "Is this the part where we get congratulated for stopping Hydra?"

Fury glared at her, and the room went silent.

"Nothing went according to plan," Fury growled. "You turned a covert operation into a circus."

Peter shifted in his seat, trying to suppress a grin. "Well, you could say we like to... improvise."

Fury's eyes narrowed. "Improvising doesn't mean leaving a trail of destruction and triggering a citywide lockdown."

"Technically," Michelle said, arms crossed, "the lockdown was a precaution. And, uh, necessary after someone"—she gave Peter a pointed look—"forgot to disable the alarms."

Peter held his hands up in defense. "I did disable the alarms! I just... missed the backup system."

"Yeah, by about a mile," Penelope muttered, smirking.

Cassie leaned back in her chair, completely unbothered. "Look, Fury, we did what we had to do. And the mission got done."

Fury slammed the stack of files on the table, his patience clearly running thin. "This is a list of everything you broke, damaged, or set on fire during that mission."

Cassie blinked. "Wait, fire? I don't remember any—"

"Spider-Woman," Fury snapped, glaring at Penelope.

Penelope shrugged, clearly unfazed. "I didn't start the fire. I just... let it spread."

Fury pinched the bridge of his nose. "I'm starting to think assigning you as a team was the worst idea of my career."

Ned's voice crackled through the room from the comms system. "I've been saying that for months, but no one listens to me."

Cassie smiled. "Oh, come on, Fury. You know you love us."

Fury looked like he was on the verge of a meltdown. "You blew up another Hydra facility. And you left Parker's phone behind with S.H.I.E.L.D. intel on it. Do you understand how close that was to being a disaster?"

Peter shifted awkwardly. "Yeah, but we, uh, got it back."

"And then the building exploded," Fury said, deadpan.

Penelope piped up. "Again, not our fault. Probably."

"Probably?" Fury echoed, raising an eyebrow.

Michelle sighed. "Okay, so the mission wasn't perfect. But we still got the intel, right?"

"That's the only reason you're not all cleaning toilets right now," Fury shot back. "You succeeded in spite of yourselves."

Damian finally spoke up, his voice calm and measured. "The team worked well under pressure, sir. We adapted when the situation changed."

Fury eyed him warily. "Wayne, I don't know how you put up with these people."

Cassie grinned. "Damian loves us. He's just too proud to admit it."

Damian didn't even blink. "I've gotten used to their... unpredictability."

Fury let out a long, exhausted sigh. "You all need serious tactical training. This level of recklessness isn't sustainable. You're walking a fine line between success and catastrophe."

"Hey, at least we're consistent," Peter offered with a sheepish smile.

"Consistently giving me headaches," Fury muttered under his breath. He took a deep breath, clearly trying to compose himself. "Alright, listen up. You're going to undergo two weeks of intensive training, and I expect you to take it seriously. No improvising. No blowing things up. Just... do the damn training."

Penny exchanged a glance with Michelle, and they both barely suppressed their grins. "Two weeks, huh? What are the odds we make it through without any incidents?"

"Zero," Damian said flatly.

"Yeah, I give it three days," Penelope added with a chuckle.

"I'm giving it one," Fury snapped. "Because the moment you step out of line, I'm pulling you all off missions. Permanently."

Peter frowned. "Permanently? You wouldn't do that to us, right?"

"Try me," Fury said, dead serious.

The team collectively quieted down. Even they knew when to push and when to back off—at least, for now.

"Fine," Cassie said with a mock sigh of defeat. "We'll behave. Scout's honor."

Fury shot her a look that made it clear he didn't believe her for a second. "Get out of my sight before I change my mind about that training."

The team shuffled out of the room, trying—and failing—not to laugh at Fury's obvious frustration.

Once they were in the hallway, Peter turned to the group, his grin back in full force. "Okay, so how long do we actually last in this 'intensive training' thing?"

Cassie smirked. "I give it a day before something goes sideways."

"Maybe less," Michelle added, stifling a laugh.

Damian sighed. "I'm not saving you when it inevitably does."

"Oh, please, Damian," Cassie teased, looping her arm through his. "You love the chaos. Admit it."

He didn't answer, but the small, hidden smile on his face said everything.

And just like that, the chaos was already brewing again.

They blew up the training room in less than four hours.

Fury did not end up banning them from missions in fact he sent them out on another mission days later.

Said mission ended up in flames.

Literally.

Penny set Peter on fire.

Also Damian ended up fist fighting a gang leader.

He won. 

(Again)