Chapter 6
They leave when Jade’s wound no longer bleeds if she moves quicker than a slow crawl.
Kit would have been perfectly content to stay with the Bone Reavers a little longer. She had complicated feelings regarding returning home. She wished to return, to sleep in her old bed and find comfort in the horribly frustrating routine that she had grown used to over the years. She wanted to see her mother, to show her Airk and prove to her that she was capable of so much more than she thought.
Kit also wanted to stay behind. She wanted to be with Jade, to run from the fact that she loved her best friend and didn’t want that to ruin the already damaged relationship with Sorsha. There was only so much that Kit could take and she had put up with so much from Sorsha but Jade would be what made or broke her relationship with her mother.
The Bone Reavers lend them a horse. Well, really it’s Scorpia that gives them a horse. She doesn’t want Jade exerting herself and made it clear that the horse was Jade’s. Jade tried to protest at first but Scorpia brushed her off and told her to bring the horse back when she returned. It was a way to get Jade to promise to at least come back once.
If Kit knew how, she would have told Scorpia not to worry, and that Jade would be back soon. Then she would turn and tell Jade how much her sister cared for her and wanted to know her.
They set off in the morning. Boorman leads the horse by the reigns so that all Jade has to do is sit there and look pretty, or so he says.
It took only a few hours before Kit joined Jade on the horse. She hadn’t intended to ride but Jade hesitantly piped up that she was getting dizzy and the group had to take a break before Jade fell right off the horse.
Elora was the one to suggest Kit ride with Jade to keep her steady, and when the group was ready to move on, Kit climbed up into the saddle first. Airk and Boorman helped lift Jade up right behind her and Kit tried not to focus on the body pressed up against hers.
Jade leaned against her, her arms wrapping around Kit’s stomach to keep herself steady as they began to move once again. Kit hooked her fingers just under the lip of the saddle and gripped it to try and distract herself from the fact that she could feel Jade’s cheek squished against the back of her neck, her breath tickling her ear as she dozed. Kit took deep breaths and tried not to squirm when frizzy red hair itched her neck.
When they reached the castle, Kit thought that her heart might beat out of her chest from how hard it was racing. She jumped slightly when Jade’s hand finally slid up from over her stomach to cover her heart.
“Just breathe,” Jade mumbled into her shoulder, sitting up slightly to pull Kit back into her.
Airk announced their return at the gate, drawing himself up as he introduced himself and demanded that they pass. Kit missed the warmth pressed against her back when they have to dismount the horse. Jade stumbled slightly and Kit reached out to slide a hand along her waist, able to breathe just a bit easier as Jade leaned into her.
As they were walking down the hallway toward the throne room, she couldn’t help but wonder if it was too late to turn back.
Her mother had stood and stepped away from the throne when she saw them. Kit barely registered Jade stepping away from her before she was swept into a crushing hug, squished next to her brother as their mother embraced them tightly.
“You’re alive,” her mother breathed out, the relief in her tone palpable. Kit swallowed hard and all the reservations she had about coming home faded away as she reached up to hug her mother back.
She couldn’t keep up with the emotional whiplash when her mother asked about Graydon. Elora burst into tears and Kit swallowed down the guilt that choked her.
While Kit despised the thought of marrying him, Graydon wasn’t a bad guy and didn’t deserve what happened to him. He was part of their little group, a true friend, and she’ll miss him.
Sorsha emptied everyone but them out of the throne room and then asked them for what had happened. The whole thing.
They took turns describing what had happened from the moment they left the gate to the moment they returned. There were small bits left out, the unimportant kind of information that nobody but them needed to know. Kit left out the part about the Bone Reavers and nobody corrected her.
Sorsha interrupted them as soon as they detailed saving Airk. “That’s enough of that for now.”
Kit wanted to pipe up and inject that their story wasn’t done. Her mother didn’t know what Jade had done for her. But Sorsha was already having servants prepare hot baths and warm meals for them and Kit was swept up in the chaos.
Jade was pulled one way and she was pulled the other. Kit couldn’t even enjoy the feeling of hot water on her skin that finally cleaned the dirt away and soothed her aching joints because she couldn’t see Jade and the feeling of uneasiness crept up on her.
Kit didn’t even look twice at the hot meal left on her desk. As soon as she finished her bath and was dressed, Kit left her room and went to try and hunt Jade down. She stumbled across Airk, who was trying to search for Elora, and joined him.
Elora was easy to find. The servants had loose lips and were chattering all about the return of Elora Danon. But when Kit poked at them to see if they knew anything about Jade, they had no idea who she was talking about.
She came across Boorman next. He mentioned that he saw Jade heading toward the stables and hot rage bubbled in Kit at the thought of Jade being forced back to where she had slept before by the barn. The baths near there were meant for servants and the water ran lukewarm.
Kit remembered using it for the first time as a child after she and Jade had gotten muddy while they were out training. Kit had told Jade that she thought her tub was broken because it wasn’t hot. Jade stuck her hand in the water and shrugged, telling Kit that it didn’t go hotter than that.
Kit then insisted that they bathe in her quarters after that. She told Jade that it was because she didn’t want them to catch a cold. Jade had stubbornly refused at first, unsure and wary about the offer. The first time she stuck her hand in the hot water, she jumped and her eyes went wide. They bathed separately at first, Jade borrowing Kit’s clothes back when they were relatively the same size. Jade only wore them until she could get a clean change of her own. But the more that Kit insisted on them using her bathroom when they came back dirty, Jade started to tell her that it was a waste of water.
“Fine. Then we can share,” Kit replied. She couldn’t remember why but the way that Jade’s face turned red under the mud smudged on her cheek was an image stuck in Kit’s head. It was extremely awkward the first time that they shared a bath but it grew easier with time. When they grew out of being children and their bodies developed, something in Kit told her that they had to stop, that it was no longer appropriate for them to share a bath.
But Kit didn’t have it in her to bring it up and Jade never mentioned it either. Kit was pretty sure that it was the first time that one of them got their monthly that it became clear that they simply weren’t supposed to be sharing a bath. Neither of them mentioned it but it just stopped abruptly.
Kit found Jade sitting on the edge of her own bed by the stables, one hand cupped over the injury on her side, still unbathed. Jade peered up at her when she approached, smiling at her slightly.
“You clean up nicely,” she said.
“Thanks,” Kit crouched down to yank out the chest of clothes that Jade stored under the bed, rifling through it for a suitable outfit. “It’s your turn now.”
With Jade’s clothes tucked under one arm, Kit held her hand out to Jade. Jade doesn’t question her, taking her hand and letting Kit tug her past the servant's baths and into the castle.
Jade doesn’t protest when Kit takes her into her quarters and her own bathroom. She doesn’t protest when Kit prepares another hot bath that certainly wasn’t for herself.
“I’ll… uh… leave you to it,” Kit said as she shuffled back toward her room. She listened as Jade started to undress herself.
Kit lay on her bed and stared at the ceiling, deep in her thoughts as she waited for Jade to finish.
“Uh, Kit?” Jade called out and Kit jolted upright. She nearly tumbled into the bathroom with her haste, her face burning scarlet when she saw Jade sink down in the water. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you. I just… I need help with my hair, I can’t lift my arm right without pulling on the... y'know.” Jade gestured vaguely to the mass of healing skin on her side.
“Right,” Kit cleared her throat and moved toward Jade, fighting the urge to look away. All she could think about was how hopelessly in love she was with her best friend and how seeing her naked at the moment wasn’t the same as when they were kids. “I’ve got you.”
The tension bled out of Jade’s shoulders as Kit washed her hair, her eyes closing as Kit’s fingers slowly detangled strands of red.
Kit wasn’t sure what sparked her next words. Perhaps it was how Jade tilted her head back to trust Kit to not get any soap in her eyes when rinsing her hair out or maybe it was the glimpse she got of the angry red scar just under the soapy water but Kit spoke without a verbal filter.
“Will you be my girlfriend?”
Jade faltered slightly, her eyes popping open to peer up at her in confusion that shifted quickly to something shy and nervous. “What?”
Kit nearly backed down and brushed it off but then thought of Jade crying out for her in the midst of a fever and doubled down. “Will you be my girlfriend?”
Jade sat up slightly, turning to lean against the edge of the tub to look at her properly. “Is that what you want?”
“Is that what you want?” Kit retorted, her heart hammering inside of her chest.
Jade eyed her for a few moments before she nodded. “Of course it is.”
Kit was quiet for a moment, the awkward silence hanging between them. “Girlfriends?” She then questioned hesitantly.
Jade nodded firmly. “Girlfriends.”
Perhaps that wasn’t how everyone asked to start dating but Kit didn’t have any more time to waste. “Good.”
Jade let out a soft laugh and Kit couldn’t help but chuckle as well. Jade then pushed herself up out of the water just enough to grab Kit’s shirt with a wet hand and a moment later their lips met.
Kit doesn’t think that she could ever get tired of kissing Jade. She had so much time to make up for. If only she wasn’t so stupid and realized her true feelings years ago.
“If we don’t stop, we’re never gonna get out before the water goes cold,” Jade mumbled against her lips.
“You’re the one that started it,” Kit pointed out but had to concede that Jade had a point. “C’mon, let me finish rinsing your hair.”
Kit managed to get control of herself for Jade to finish bathing, get dressed, and start on trying to braid her hair before they started to kiss again.
Kit couldn’t tell you when she straddled Jade’s lap or cupped her face to pull her closer but she just knew that it was everything she wanted.
She was so enchanted with the girl in front of her that she didn’t hear her door open until she heard them.
“Kit!”
Kit jumped away from Jade so fast that she forgot there wasn’t a bed behind her and toppled onto the ground. “Mom!”
“What do you think you’re doing?” Sorsha demanded, crossing the room. “Your fiancé is dead, Kit, and you’re in here kissing a girl?”
Kit stood quickly, on the defensive immediately. “I never wanted a fiancé in the first place!” There were no romantic feelings between them. Yes, Kit mourned Graydon and she was sure that it would hit her hard, and the realization that he was gone would set in the longer she had time to rest and sort through her feelings but at the moment, Kit was just glad they were alive.
“We’ve talked about this,” Sorsha was getting mad. Kit should have known that the relief she was okay wasn’t enough to placate her mother. “I can forgive this given the circumstances and high emotions--”
“Forgive?” Kit could feel her face twist into something bitter and angry. “There is nothing to forgive because I’m not sorry.”
“That’s enough, Kit,” her mother’s voice took on a familiar warning tone.
“Or what?” Kit’s heart was back to beating hard in her chest.
“Why must you be so childish at the moment?” Sorsha seemed exasperated at her. “Graydon Hastur is dead. Your fiancé died, Kit!”
“Jade nearly did as well!” Kit yelled back, straightening up, her breath caught in her throat. She waited for a rebuttal but her mother had gone quiet and was looking to the right.
Kit nearly forgot about the girl on her bed. Jade had her head bowed, her hands clasped in her lap.
“Show her,” Kit urged Jade, taking advantage of her mother’s silence. “Please.”
Jade looked unsure and Kit never wanted to push her to do something that she was uncomfortable with. But Jade's face softened when their eyes met and she stood, facing the queen, and pulled her shirt up.
They hadn’t rewrapped the injury yet. Kit had meant to after sorting out Jade’s hair and giving the wound some time to breathe but then they had started to kiss and Kit had simply forgotten.
Kit had thought that she would feel some sort of satisfaction in catching her mother off guard but watching the color drain from Sorsha’s face just left her feeling sick.
“What happened?” Sorsha breathed out.
Kit was then reminded that in a way, her mother had watched Jade grow up beside her. They were attached at the hip and wherever Kit went, Jade wasn’t far behind. Her mother had put up with Jade appearing at balls and parties that people of her status shouldn’t even. She got used to hearing about Kit cajoling the royal healers into looking after Jade. She had even approved of Jade to start her training to be the first female knight.
“I took a blade to the side,” Jade reported quietly. Her fingers gripped the hem of her shirt tightly as she held it up, shivering at the cold air on her stomach as Sorsha stared at the healing mess of skin.
“She took it for me,” Kit tacked on, her mother’s eyes finally peeling away from the injury to look at her. “I could have died, Mom.”
“You didn’t tell me any of this?” Sorsha frowned but there was no anger in her tone.
“You didn’t let me,” Kit retorted. “You stopped us before we could.”
Sorsha swallowed hard, inclining her head in acknowledgment. “Very well… finish your story then.”
Jade smoothed down her shirt as Kit picked up the story where they left off. It was hard to talk about finding out that Jade had been injured. She detailed how they made it found their way back up the edge of the world and crossed the Shattered Sea once again. Kit detailed how Jade fell to a fever and how she could hear whispers of Willow being unsure that she would make it.
Kit left out the Bone Reavers, just as they did in the original telling. Instead, she swapped it out with a kind group they stumbled upon that lent them help.
Sorsha crossed the room and reached out to Jade. Jade flinched slightly and Kit resisted the urge to smack the outstretched hands away, too used to traveling on the road, ready for danger at any moment.
“Jade Claymore,” her mother began, setting her hands on Jade’s shoulders as she looked her in the eye. She then dipped her head down in gratitude. “Thank you.”
There was a weight in her words that settled uncomfortably in Kit’s stomach.
“Thank you,” Sorsha repeated once again. “For bringing her home to me.”
“I was only doing as you asked, my queen,” Jade replied, her voice unusually quiet as she averted her eyes.
“I knew I could count on you to keep her safe,” Sorsha let go of Jade’s shoulders and turned to Kit.
Kit tensed up when her mother approached her, not expecting another tight hug. Her mother cupped the back of her head to her chest and held her tightly, and Kit was reminded of when she was a small child before her father left and her mother would hold her just the same.
“I’m happy that you are alive, my daughter,” Sorsha whispered into her hair and Kit squeezed her eyes shut to hold back the tears that sprung up at those words. She realized that her mother didn't realize how close they had come to death. “I had no doubt that you would bring your brother back.”
Kit felt like the wind was knocked out of her with those words. “You did?”
Her mother pulled back just enough to cup her face in her hands. “You take after your father in many ways, Kit. You love as fiercely as you breathe and you will stop at nothing to protect those you care about.” Sorsha smiled at her, something sad in her eyes. “You are my stubborn girl and when you put your mind to something, you won’t back down first. I knew that you would do it. I’m proud of you for that.”
Kit soaked up the praise like a man starved but was unable to focus on the words she had wanted to hear for so long. “I love Jade.” She couldn't let herself fall into the comfort of her mother if it was just going to hurt more later.
Sorsha looked at her and slowly let her face go. Kit missed the warmth of her hands but refused to back down.
“I love her and I almost lost her. You married for love, Mom. You loved Dad more than anything. You got to pick who you love,” Kit took advantage of the high emotions, knowing that whatever she said next could make or break what she does after that. “Why can’t I do the same thing?”
Her mother took a deep breath and then took a step away. “I think that we should discuss this in the morning after a long night’s rest.”
Kit felt like her heart dropped into her stomach. She wanted to yell and get angry, to demand to her mother that if she was happy that she was alive then she would grant her this one thing. But Kit was tired. She was so very tired.
“Goodnight, Kit,” Sorsha said, her voice strangely flat despite the emotions she showed moments earlier. “Jade.” She nodded at the redhead hovering nearby before she left.
The moment the door closed, Kit turned to face Jade just as two arms wrapped around her. Kit fell into the warm hold, unsure of how to even begin to untangle the web of complicated emotions that she felt. “Jade--”
“Shh, not now,” Jade kissed the top of her head, swaying in place as she held Kit tight. “We have all the time in the world to talk. Let’s sleep.”
“Stay?” Kit blurted as if they hadn’t slept next to each other for the past few weeks or had been sneaking into each other's beds since they were children.
Jade smiled at her softly. “Where else would I go?” She pressed a kiss to the bridge of Kit's nose. "I would like to sleep in the same bed as my girlfriend."
Hearing those words made Kit's heart soar and soothed the sting she felt left behind from her mother.