The camera clicked quietly and Mary turned around in surprise.
"Did you take a picture of me?"
Lily grinned.
"I did. You looked so peacefull in the sunlight"
Mary laughed loudly, the type of laugh Lily had selfishly titled the Lily-laugh in her mind, when Mary laughed so wide that all her teeth were showing and her eyes were closed in delight.
Lily couldn’t remember ever caring so much about seeing someone else laugh, but when Mary did, the world just felt so alright, perfectly whole.
In her dreams her friend was always laughing when they were together.
"I look a mess, I didn't even do my makeup today" Mary shook her head, still smiling, as she leaned back on her ellbows.
"You're beautiful either way" Lily assured.
"Oh really?" Mary answered, feigning surprise.
Lily chuckled, shaking her head.
"Of course. I mean, look at you. Those beautiful eyes, your gorgeous curls, those soft lips" she exclaimed dramaticaly and Mary grinned.
"Maybe you should become a poet Evans" she smirked and Lily acted flattered, brushing a strand of red hair behind her ear.
"I might...Maybe you'll soon find my collection with a dedication for my wonderful friend Mary"
"I'd love to read it" Mary said, wiggling her brows and Lily laughed.
"First we'd have to pass our exams though" she said, pointing at the books which lay on the blanket between them and Mary groaned.
"Just one afternoon without studying honey, please..." she sighed, lying down fully, looking up at the clear sky.
Sunlight was lighting up her brown eyes and clinging to her long dark lashes.
"We've spend hours not studying" Lily answered, lying down too.
They were quiet for a second until Mary spoke up again.
"Have you thought about it? What you want to do after school?"
Lily looked up into the deep blue sky.
"Sure. But I'm still not really sure about it...Do you know it?"
"No" Mary said turning her head towards Lily with a smile.
"But it doesn’t matter I suppose. We've still got so much time left"
Lily smiled too.
"Right. Graduation will only be the beginning"
"You should let me take a picture of you too. You look amazing in this light" Mary comented suddenly, but Lily shook her head.
"I got this camera to capture the things around me. Not myself" she explained seriously.
Mary shrugged.
"To bad. Your hair looks like sunset turned into strands"
"Who's the poet now?" Lily smiled softly, her cheeks heating up a bit.
"I could say it looks fire. But that would be boring. And it's not completely true either. I think it looks like sunsets" Mary smiled, closing her eyes satisfied.
Lily laughed.
"I like it too. I don't think anyone has ever compared my hair to that so far"
"Yup. That's cause others don't look at it properly"
"But you do I suppose?" Lily grinned.
"Of course. I sit together with you in just about every class Lily" Mary snorted.
"No one has more time to look at you than me"
Lily hummed.
"Don't people normally stop noticing things when they spend a lot of time together?"
"When they don't care maybe" Mary shrugged.
"So you care about me?" Lily teased, pushing Mary gently with her elbow.
"Don't be silly, of course I care" Mary sighed, pushing Lilys arm away.
"You're my best friend after all"
Lily smiled.
"Yeah. Thankfully. What would I do without you..."
Mary side eyed her.
"Everything alright? You're a bit to sentimental for my liking..."
Lily blinked.
"Am I not allowed to be happy about having you as my friend?"
"Of course you are. But when you act like that there’s normally something else going on" Mary said knowingly with a raised brow, but Lily just shook her head.
"I'm fine. Honestly, I'm just happy"
Mary chuckled.
"Well, I suppose I can’t be worried about that..."
Lily grinned.
"No. You really can’t..."
The camera clicked quietly, barely audible through the yelling of tons of Hogwarts students.
Mary was on her tiptoes, leaning against the railing, her hair floating in the wind, cheeks flushed in excitement.
"Come on Marlene, you got it!" She yelled at the top of her lungs, hand slapping on the railing in excitement.
Lily knew she should focus on the Quidditch game right infront of them, but her eyes were glued to Mary, who was way to focused to notice.
But she looked so pretty in her dark red sweater and the silver loop earings, which swayed acording to her movements.
She wore the cherry lipgloss Lily had gifted her for christmas, turning her lips gliterry and glossy, perfectly in tune with her redned cheeks.
There was something so fascinating in the way she cheered, her face morphing from happiness to shock to anger back to happiness, every single emotion so visible on her.
Every now and then she would yell out in support for the Gryffindor team or groan in disbelief, Lily could feel the wodden floor beneath her shoes wobble slightly as Mary stomped on the ground.
"Did you see that? They almost knocked her off, what the fuck!"
Lily guiltily send a glance towards the field, but Marlene was already sitting safely again, chasing the Quaffle, which was now in the possession of the Slytherin chaser.
"Gosh I just can't stand her" Mary said with a vicious glance at the Slytherin beater, who'd apparently attacked Marlene.
Lily chuckled causing Mary to turn in surprise, looking at her questioningly.
"Nothing" Lily said quickly.
"You just get so excited over Quidditch games"
"Well of course! I'm gonna cry myself to sleep if we don't win" Mary grinned, leaning back on the railing and following the game concentratedly.
"I doubt we'll loose, look at Marlene" Lily grinned, pointing at their friend who already had the Quaffle back in her hand.
"Get 'em Marlene!" Mary yelled excitedly, the other Gryffindors cheering along as Marlene successfully threw the ball through the hoop, the Slytherin keeper standing no chance at catching it.
"Yes girl!" Mary screamed jumping up and down, her excitement infecting Lily too, who happily cheered Marlenes name.
Their friend gave them a quick wave in passing and Mary pretended to faint into Lilys arms, her curls tickling Lily and her soft fruit shampoo smell turning the cloudy day into sunshine.
For Lily at least.
The game was over quite quickly with Gryffindor taking the win.
Mary was ecstatic, hugging Lily as if they’d just ensured world peace and Lily let herself be dragged along through the crowd, to greet Marlene outside of the arena.
"Bloody hell, McKinnon, I might fall for you!" Mary cheered happily as their friend walked over.
"Your standarts are to low if one Quidditch game makes you fall in love" Marlene grinned, her face still glowing from the excitement of the win.
"Well...I'm gonna come to the next one too?" Mary suggested, throwing her arm around Marlenes neck as they walked towards the castle.
"You can come, but you can’t have me" Marlene smirked and Mary sighed theatrically.
"A shame! We'd be so cute together!"
"Careful, before a certain someone hears you" Marlene answered chuckling.
"A certain Slytherin girl mh?" Mary inquired.
"Where is she either way?"
"Came to me immediately after the game. Sorry, Macdonald, you were to slow" Marlene laughed and Mary broke out in fake tears.
"No need to be sad, you can have Lily"
Lily blinked in surprise, not expecting to be involved in the conversation, not like this anyway.
"I...what are you even talking about Marlene?" She exclaimed, voice sounding awfully nervous and Marlene grinned.
"Just a joke"
Mary laughed obliviously, throwing her other arm around Lilys shoulder too.
"Sounds good. What's our next date gonna be: studying for Potions or studying for Charms. Or maybe even better: studying for Transfiguration?"
Lily rolled her eyes.
"Very funny..."
But her cheeks were turning red at the mention of dates and Marlene grinned even wider, making Lily nervous.
Thankfully it was Mary herself, who saved the situation.
"Oh dear, today I'm so happy, I might even concider partying with the boys"
"Listen to that! They must be very honored!" Marlene laughed.
"The better be! My presence at a party is a gift. Particularly to these loosers..."
Lily grinned.
"Well James and Sirius took part in winning too..." Marlene remembered and Mary rolled her eyes.
"Didn’t make half as many points as you today, so they should stay humble"
"Potter and humble?" Marlene laughed.
"Not compatible" Lily grinned.
"That's what I’m saying: Loosers. They’re just not on our level ladies" Mary grinned, throwing her head back in the wind happily.
"Of course not" Marlene agreed happily, pinching Marys side, who stumbled giggling into Lily.
The camera clicked loudly in the quiet room, Mary rolling her eyes.
She was sitting on Lilys bed, a mirror in her hand and an eyeshadow brush in the other.
"Are you gonna start photographing me during everything now?"
Lily shrugged.
"You're just so photogenic"
"Next you're gonna photograph me while eating my cereal..." and they both laughed cause it was a well known fact between them that Mary was a bit messy with her cereal.
"But seriously, everytime I take a picture of you it turns out amazing. It's almost unfair..." Lily sighed.
Mary raised her brows, while concentrating on her makeup.
"That's all just personal opinions Lily. Photogenic or not, pretty or not. I don't think I look that great in pictures. Meanwhile you look stunning. See, just personal mindsets" she put her brush down, searching through her makeup bag for a different palette.
Lily sighed.
There was no use in disagreeing, cause she didn’t know how to explain it to her friend.
That sure, she was photogenic, but there was something more to her, something so alive, something that made Lilys eyes always travel to her first in a crowd, that had her sitting on the floor now, unable to tear her eyes away from Mary, even if she tried.
That she couldn’t really explain it...
That she didn’t know...
"Lily? Hello, you still here?" Mary pulled her out of her thoughts.
"Mh?" Lily mumbled embarrassed.
"Stop zoning out while staring at me, that's creepy" Lily turned red and Mary chuckled.
"No hard feelings. Anyway, don't you want to do your makeup too?"
Lily shrugged.
"Just to get some candy in Hogsmeade?"
Mary sighed.
"Oh sweetie" she gently patted the bed next to her and Lily got up, sitting down next to her.
"Listen, remember how we talked on the train, about you really dreaming of getting into a relationship?"
Lily could tell that this was already going into a bad direction.
"That was just me random talking, nothing serious..." she mumbled, playing with the seam of her pullover.
Mary raised a brow.
"Yeah sure. Anyway, so me and Marlene talked..."
"Marlene?" Lily asked, her worry growing by the second.
"Yeah, remember, our friend, the blond one" Mary sighed sarcastically.
"Either way, we talked and decided that Hogsmeade would be a perfect opportunity to kind of...start the hunt" she grinned, while Lily leaned against the bedpost.
"The hunt?" She asked unconvinced.
"Oh come on Lily, everyone is going to Hogsmeade, we can hang out with them, get Butterbeer or whatever. You can talk with the Ravenclaw boys that we sit together with in class for example"
Lily pulled a face.
"Just as a start" Mary said.
"It's easier to find someone during a fun outing when everyone is relaxed and is enjoying themselves. And now we'll get you all ready and glammed up, let’s go!"
Mary looked so excited that Lily couldn’t help but laugh.
"If you just wanted to do my makeup you could have just told me" she grinned as she pushed some brushes out of the way and moved closer to her friend.
"Trust me, I'll make you look like a princess. Potters gonna trip over his feet" Mary smirked as she reached for Lilys own makeup bag (which was significally smaller than Marys one).
"Forget Potter" Lily rolled her eyes.
"Also he isn't into me anymore" she said.
Mary shrugged.
"Maybe. I mean, even boys have to mature at some point. Gosh, I really have to buy you some proper makeup palettes for christmas Lily..."
Lily smiled.
"It's called subtle makeup Mary"
Her friend shook her head.
"Never heard of it before. Now let’s get you ready" she started dotting bits of foundation on Lilys skin with a brush.
Her face was so close, Lily could see her perfectly curled lashes, the warm brown eyes that looked at her with such concentration that Lily could feel her heart struggle to beat in her chest.
"Your skin is so freaking dry" Mary commented, applying more product below Lilys eyes.
"Always has been. You're not gonna put more on the rest of my face?" She asked, concerned about the little amounts her friend used on her cheeks and forehead.
"Basics of makeup: you don't create new features, you enhance the once you already have" Mary explained, while reaching for Lilys powder.
"Why would I hide your beautiful freckles under thick layers of foundation when they’re one of the most beautiful things on your face?"
Lily shrugged as Mary powdered her.
"I know some Slytherins who'd disagree..."
"And since when do we care about Slytherins? They'll always disagree, either to be edgy or cause they just want to bully others to feel better about themselves" Mary said sternly, checking her work.
"I don't get it. I'd never bully someone else because I don't like myself..." Lily sighed and Mary shook her head, grabbing one of her own palettes.
"That's because you are you. You're just a good person"
"And all of them aren't?"
Mary shrugged.
"Don't know. Maybe they’re just insecure teenagers. Maybe they'll change as they grow older. Or they won't" she picked up a light colour on the brush.
"Close your eyes" she instructed, Lily obeying.
"I don't think they’re all bad. Maybe I give them to much credit, but I just don’t believe it. I don't want to. That would be to depressing you know"
Mary chuckled.
"Yeah I get it"
"What?"
"Good that Marlene isn't here, she'd make fun of you"
"Marlene just doesn't have the emotional capacity that we have" Lily grinned, listening as Mary sorted through her palletes looking for the next color.
"Now you are bullying" Mary laughed.
"Marlene said that herself recently. So it’s just facts" Lily said with a smile.
"Suppose. Hold still, I'm gonna do the crease" Mary instructed and began to work.
They sat quietly, Mary applying more eyeshadow and eyliner, till Lily opened her eyes again.
Her friend watched her carefully, makimg Lily laugh.
"This is serious Evans" Mary smiled, pointing at Lily with the eyliner.
"Okay. Let’s do brows and blush. Ugh, you'll look so pretty!" Lily smiled letting Mary work away at her face excitedly, till she pulled out the mascara.
"Look down and blink when I say it" Mary said, carefully applying the black formula a few times before looking at Lily with content.
"You're literally perfect!" She smiled, so widely as if she just passed an exam.
"Look" and she gave Lily the mirror.
Looking back was a beautiful face.
Lilys eyes were framed in soft brown colors, a slight glittery shimmer across her lids as her lashes gently faned against her cheecks which were of a soft red.
"Damn Mary" Lily whispered and her friend smirked.
"Did I just see someone fall in love with themselves?"
"I think I just fell in love with you" Lily said, eyes growing big as soon as the words left her mouth, her heart skipping a beat.
Mary just laughed.
"Guess, I have to fight of the boys then huh?" She grinned, throwing the red cherry lipgloss at Lily.
"I swear, that one is the best thing on this earth!"
Lily could feel sweat form on her forehead from how hot and embarrassed she felt, but she took the gloss with a smile.
"Thanks"
It wasn’t rare for the Gryffindor girls to share their lipsticks and glosses and still it felt different when she used Marlenes or Alices ones compared to Marys.
Not that the physical sensation was that different, but still Lily treassured the feeling of dragging the plastic over her lips, spreading the glittery substance.
Mary stretched her arms over her head without a care.
"I think I should go search for Marlene, after all she's my partner in crime when it comes to getting you out of your single situation"
Lily rolled her eyes, grabbing her camera and bag.
"Well, then let’s find her, it's probably almost time anyway. Don't want your hard work to be wasted right?" She smiled getting up and removing her coat from the rag.
Mary slid of the bed too.
"It's not wasted. I enjoyed seeing it a lot" she smiled and Lily had to advert her gaze.
"Yeah. That's true. I'm glad you did..."
The camera clicked quietly, capturing Mary throwing her head back from laughing as Marlene beat Peter at armwrestling for the 4th time in a row.
They were all seated in the common room after their day in Hogsmeade, the fire finally bringing back some warmth into their cold limbs.
"They didn’t have any of the things we needed though. So we sadly can't go through with any of the fun pranks we had planned for the teachers..." sighed James dramatically.
"Still better than us. Marlene left all the work to me today..." Mary said.
"What work?" James asked.
"None of your buisness" Marlene smiled.
"Then don't mention it" James said annoyed.
"Either way, I'll never work with you again" Mary said dramatically and Marlene laughed.
"No worries, by the end of the year everything will figure itself out. I know that" she said with a mysterious grin and Lily shifted uncomfortably in her chair.
"Don't tell me you're into Divination too now" Sirius groaned, but Marlene just rolled her eyes.
"Ask Sybill if you want to talk about Divination"
"Come on, she's just pretending with her visions" James shook her head.
"Actually, I think she does believe that she sees something..." Remus argued from behind his book.
"Maybe she does see something though?" Lily suggested, but Sirius just laughed.
"Sure. Recently she told me I would go through great improvement. She suggested it might be connected to getting house points"
Marlene laughed out loud.
"You? Housepoints? For what, misbehaving a little less?"
"Well, you've got no reason to talk to me like that. Check yourself first" Sirius answered.
"Scary, coming from the boy with hair like a birdnest" Marlene grinned.
"Thin ice" Sirius said with a glance in Remus direction who just shrugged.
"I told you brushing it wouldn't hurt" he said without looking away from his book.
"You guys just don't get the style!"
As the others argued away Mary walked over, dropping down on the couch next to Lily.
"Sorry about today. I think the Ravenclaw boys are just to shy for us" she sighed, playing with a strand of Lilys hair, tangling it around her finger and releasing it.
"It doesn’t really matter Mary. Seriously, I don't care half as much about it as you think I do..."
Mary smiled.
"I know. I just want you to be happy"
Lily send her a glance and Mary quickly corrected: "Not to say you can't be happy without being in a relationship. Of course not. But you know...you're really amazing Lily. And I think you'd deserve someone who can remind you of that. Cause you sometimes forget, you know" she nodged Lily.
"I've got you guys. You tell me I'm amazing all the time"
Mary smiled again.
"It's different when someone who loves you says it"
"You just want to act more experienced" Lily sighed, but she could feel her heart thump in her chest.
"Maybe. I don't have much else going for me" Mary said, winking at her.
"Don't be stupid. You've got so much going for you" Lily sighed, resting her head on Marys shoulder, watching as Sirius and James tried to throw some candy into the others mouth from across the room.
"Yeah? And what would that be?" Mary asked warmly.
Lily traced along her friends fingers, sliding her finger over Marys golden rings.
"You're kind and creative. You love being around people and enjoy helping them with their problems. You're the best listener and always have tips regarding fashion and makeup. You stand up for what you believe and you're loyal and super protective"
Mary laughed, resting her head on Lilys.
"You're gonna make me shy Evans!"
And she did infact sound a bit embarrassed.
"Why? It's just facts, Macdonald" Lily grinned, shuffling closer.
"Do you use a different shampoo?" She mumbled tiredly.
"Mhm. It's vanilla. I stole it from Alice"
Lily laughed.
"Poor her"
"I'll let her borrow mine" Mary promised.
"It does smell good though" Lily said, pushing her head against Marys shoulder, the soft fabric from her cardigan pressing against her cheek as vanilla filled her lungs.
"It does. But it’s a bit strong" Mary said, before suddenly grabbing Lilys waist, pulling her onto a lap, causing Lily to release a surprised scream.
"Mary!" She yelled as she grabbed for the others shoulders to stable herself.
"Come here you little cuddlebug!" Mary laughed, tickling Lilys stomach till she was wiggling around like a worm, a mixture of laughter and begging for Mary to stop leaving her mouth.
"Get a room!" Sirius yelled and Mary removed one hand to show him the middle finger, Lily using her chance to escape to the other side of the couch.
"You ruined my chance Black!" Mary yelled and Lily giggled.
"As if you aren't together 24/7..." Peter commented.
"Still" Mary said, crossing her arms infront of her chest.
Marlene smiled.
Lily bit her lip anxiously.
"I think I'll better go to bed now..." she said quietly.
"See, you ruined the moment" Mary sighed but Sirius just shrugged.
"I'll stay a bit longer, I still have to finish the Transfiguration essay" Mary said in Lilys direction.
"Sure. Well...goodnight everyone" Lily answered, waving awkwardly before hurrying up the stairs to the bed chambers.
She felt weird.
Exposed even.
Normally she loved being around her friends, but right now she prefered to not have them around.
Or have them stare like that.
Or make comments like that.
Actually she just wanted to sleep it all of.
Tomorrow things would be back to normal.
For sure.
The camera clicked quietly.
"Did you just photograph Mary while sleeping?" Marlene snorted.
Lily shrugged.
"Look at her, hugging her plushie and all. So cute"
Marlene sighed.
"Lily?"
"Mh?"
"Can we like...have a talk?"
Lily had a bad feeling about this.
"Yeah, sure" she smiled anyway.
Marlene got up from her bed.
"Let's leave Mary to her afternoon nap" she said, taking Lily by the wrist and pulling her along.
They traveled through the common room, down some stairs and into a corridor where they eventually took a seat on the wide cold stone windowstill.
From here they could look down all the way to the lake.
"So? Why so secretive?" Lily asked nervously.
Right now she noticed how long it had been since she and Marlene had spoken alone.
Somehow she had the feeling she had been avoiding her friend in a sense.
She couldn’t quite explain that to herself though, all she could feel was the guilt of being a bad friend.
Marlene sighed.
"You know...I don't know if I really should talk to you about this, but I've been kind of thinking I should..."
"Okay...What about?" Lily asked nervously, playing with the strings of her shoes.
Marlen looked up.
"Do you like Mary?"
Lily blinked.
"Of course" she laughed but Marlene just sighed again.
"Not like that Lily. I mean, do you have a crush on her?"
Lily blinked again.
For a second she couldn’t even answer, her heart beating loudly in her ears.
"A...crush? On Mary?" She then asked quietly.
Marlene leaned back against the wall behind her and wrapped her arms around her knees.
"A crush on Mary" she confirmed.
Lily looked around in shock.
"Marlene, I'm not a lesbian" she then said in disbelief.
"I never said you were" her friend answered simply.
"Then why'd you ask me if I have a crush on my best friend?" It sounded harsher than Lily had intended it too.
"I mean...you know I have no problem with being gay or a lesbian, absolutely not. But I'm just not..."
Marlene reached out and gently grabbed Lilys hand.
"I know. Not being gay doesn't mean you're homophobic" she let go of Lilys hand again and looked out the window.
"The thing is: You seem like you like her. I know it's not my buisness, but I'm...well I'm your friend too you know"
Lily sat for a minute unable to answer, before brushing her hair back in hopes of calming a few of her overwhelmed nerves.
"Of course. And it's fine. It's just...How could I have a crush on Mary?"
She looked at her shoes.
"I'm not a lesbian"
Marlene looked at her with something that seemed like concern.
"Lily..." she sighed again.
"You're always around Mary, you go wherever she goes. All you do is talk about her, you're like a Mary Macdonald dictionary. You always immediately notice when something changes about her, you look at her and zone out all the time, I can't even count how often you call her pretty a week and yesterday in the common room-"
"Maybe I'm just a good friend!" Lily exclaimed, a certain wave of anger hitting her.
She felt backed against a wall.
"Friends don't know that kind of shit about each other. You literally know it all, her clothing size, her makeup shade, her favorite flowers, her zodiac sign, all of it!"
Lily hardly noticed how heavy she was breathing.
"Maybe I'm just not a bad friend like you Marlene!" She said as she got up, knowing it wasn’t fair.
What freaked her out was that Marlene, Marlene-never-afraid-to-start-a-fight, just sat quietly and looked at her.
"Or maybe I'm a good friend and your bisexual. I don't know Lily. You tell me" and with that she hoped of the windowstill and walked away without looking back.
Lily stood quietly.
She only noticed the tears in her eyes once Marlene was long gone.
'I don't like Mary' she thought.
"I don't like Mary" she whispered to herself.
But the worst thing was that she didn’t believe herself anymore.
It was as if Marlene had opened a door and now Lily didn’t know how to close it anymore.
She thought of Mary smiling at her.
Heart racing.
Mary saying her name.
Heart racing.
Mary changing in their bedroo-
Lily shook her head.
"No" she whispered, as she headed back to the common room.
"I'm not. I swear I'm not!"
The camera clicked quietly, the noise being drowned out by the chatting of the other few students, who also hadn’t finished breakfast yet.
Mary looked up from her cereal, grinning.
"Stop!"
Lily smiled.
"Don't worry, you’re eating very neatly"
Mary rolled her eyes, shoving another spoon full into her mouth.
Lily watched her quietly.
She had decided to not let any of the weird thoughts that plagued her come between her and Mary.
Not even Marlene and her stupid opinions.
Yet it proved to be increasingly difficult to be close to Mary.
Every touch, every look, every word turned in Lilys brain like a tornado till she was dizzy.
Of course she knew she should probably put her emotions into words, work them out, maybe on paper, but every time she wanted to a strong dislkike for the idea overcame her.
A fear of unravelling things she didn’t want to see, things that had come up so suddenly that Lily had had no chance to prepare herself for them.
Things that came even though she had never wanted them to.
Really, all she wanted was to go back to being able to just being normal friends without second guessing everything they did.
"Lily?"
"Mh?" She realized she had zoned out.
Mary sighed.
"You good?"
Lily nodded quickly.
"Yeah of course!" She smiled and Mary nodded.
"Well then let's go, I have to grab some books from the common room"
They got up, making their way through the great hall and through the doors, walking up the countless stairs.
On the way Lily noticed the slight frown on Marys face, an expression that normally meant that she wanted to say something but wasn’t sure if she should.
"Something wrong?" Lily asked gently, her words coming out a bit thin from being out of breath.
Mary bit her lip but then shrugged.
"Don't know, I was just wondering if you and Marlene are alright" she said carefully, sending a glance at Lilys direction.
"Yeah. Of course. Why?" Lily answered, without looking at Mary.
She wasn’t good at lying to her.
"It just feels like you're avoiding her...And you normally never do that. Even when there's an issue"
Of course Mary was right.
Lily wasn’t the type of person who could leave an argument just like that, she had to clear the situation up or she'd drown in guilt and worry.
In fact she wasn’t necessarily someone who fought a lot with her friends in general.
But this was different...
"I don't know...I guess we kind of had...a disagreement" she sighed, unable to lie further to her friend.
"A disagreement? As in?" Mary asked with furrowed brows.
Lily shook her head.
"She just...I just feel like she made assumptions that were a bit...that crossed the line" she said quietly, crossing her arms infront of her chest.
"Well it's Marlene...I think sometimes she doesn't recognize that there is a line. But she doesn't mean it in a bad way you know. To her it just makes sense" Mary tried to comfort her and Lily shrugged.
"Yeah. I guess..."
"Am I allowed to ask what the assumption was though?" Mary asked, a bit of curiosity in her voice.
"I promise I won't tell!"
Lily couldn’t help but chuckle.
"It's not like a secret, it's just stupid" she sighed.
"So what is it?" Mary urged with a smile.
Lily looked at her, unsure.
She always told Mary everything.
And she didn’t have to mention it all...
"Oh whatever, maybe I'll feel better talking about it" she sighed, quickly looking around to check if they were by themselves before turning back around to Mary who looked at her curiously.
"She basically asked me if I'm bisexual" she whispered quietly.
"Oh" Mary said, but she didn't look very shooked.
"And?" Lily asked anxiously, her heart already beating heavily in her chest.
"What?"
"Well, what do you think?" Lily asked.
Mary grinned.
"What am I supposed to think Lily? I don't know who you are attracted to" she said gently and Lily sighed, her shoulders dropping a bit.
Suddenly there were tears in her eyes again.
She herself hadn’t expected this reaction and Mary even less.
She looked at Lily, eyes widening and quickly reaching out for her.
"Hey! Hey, hey, it's okay..." she said in surprise as Lily rushed into her arms, hidding her face at Marys shoulder and hoping no one would see her like this.
She could feel Marys warm hand against her back, the other gently stroking through her hair.
"Gosh Lily, it's okay, I promise you. And it doesn’t matter much any way yeah? We'll always be on your side, so don't worry so much" Mary said quietly, gently swaying Lily from side to side.
"But...what if I am?" Lily sobbed, surprised by the violence of her own emotions.
Mary held her tighter.
"Than you are. And that’s it. Would you see me any different if I told you I'm a lesbian and not bi?"
Lily shook her head.
"Exactly. It doesn’t matter Lily. Love is not a curse, even if it’s a girl"
She gently pulled away, looking into Lilys eyes, smiling softly.
"I love you just the way you are. To me you will always be my smart, gorgeous and talented Lily. And I'll always be right by your side, okay? No matter what you're going through, no matter who you love. Always!"
New tears spilled from Lilys eyes and Mary sighed.
Youdon'tgetit, Lily thought, but she stayed quiet her lips looked.
She had already said to much, already revealed to much.
If she took one more step she would fall from the edge.
And hit the ground with full speed.
So she just quickly brushed her tears and tried to smile, even if it looked pathetic.
"Thanks Mary" she whispered, trying to ignore the concern in her friends eyes.
"You're welcome. Just...you know take it easy. Sometimes you figure these things out with time, you don't need to come to a conclusion immediately you know..."
Lily nodded.
"Yeah, I know" she laughed.
"I should probably apologize to Marlene"
Mary grinned.
"Tell her she’s an unempathetic bitch"
"Then she'll break off our friendship" Lily sighed with a smile.
"But Marlene is the one who always talks big about being honest" Mary answered, both of them slowly continuing their walk.
"Did the stairs move?" Lily asked.
"Yup. Maybe we should try to avoid mental breakdowns on the stairs from now on" Mary laughed and Lily couldn’t help but giggle.
"Yeah. I suppose that would help"
The camera clicked loudly, capturing Mary waving at it as she ran past Lily with an almost glowing smile.
They had recently taken to playing soccer outside, something the ones with muggle parents had established.
The boys had gotten quite serious about it very fast, but the girls competitive spirit wasn’t to be underestimated.
Particularly Mary and James had gotten pretty much obsessed with the game, spending even breakfast or the usual hang outs in the common room to argue about who was the better player.
Currently she and said boy were on the same team though, playing against Marlene, Peter and Sirius.
Remus flopped down next to Lily on the thin blanket.
"Not interested in playing?" He asked, nodding at her.
"I twisted my ankle while walking to Herbology" she shrugged and he raised his brows in concern.
"It's okay, it doesn’t even hurt that bad" she asured quickly.
"But soccer would maybe be a bit overenthusiastic right now"
He nodded.
"Probably"
"What about you?"
"I...mh-"
But he was interrupted.
"Lily, Lily, take a photo when I make this goal!" Mary yelled excitedly, waving at her and Lily pulled her camera.
"Think you can get past me?" Sirius boosted from his spot between the two sticks that symbolized the goal.
"I already did twice!" Mary said with a grin.
"Don't get cocky now" Sirius replied.
Mary took her shot, Lily capturing her as her foot smashed into the ball, but this time Sirius was faster, catching the ball, causing Marlene and Peter to cheer and Mary and James to roll their eyes.
Remus chuckled.
"Who'd have thought they’d get so excited over regular soccer..."
Lily grinned.
"You should think a whole magical castle should be much more interesting"
Remus shook his head.
"I don't quite get them. But well, if it makes them happy..."
Like on cue Sirius cried out in anger (James had successfully made a goal).
"Well...makes them...excited I suppose" Lily grinned.
"Come on, where's our applause, we freaking won!" Mary cheered, arm in arm with James and Peter clapped sarcastically.
They all dropped down on the blanket, Marlene making a face.
"Technically it's really to cold to sit outside by now"
"Be happy, at least it has stopped raining" Peter shrugged.
"Got any snacks?" Mary asked and Lily reached for her bag in which she'd wisely packed a whole bunch of chocolate frogs, which she spilled onto the blanket.
"I love you" Mary smiled widely, grabbing for one.
"Wrong. You love chocolate" Lily corected.
"Polyamory. I can love both of you" Mary shrugged, eating her frog quickly.
"Is that even concidered polyamorous?" Peter asked.
"Is there a term for being in love with candy?" Marlene asked, reaching for a frog herself.
"I don't like where this conversation is going" Remus noted and James laughed.
"Why, this is important for Mary!" Sirius exclaimed and Mary smiled, already hunting for her second frog in the pile.
"Very. Chocolate is my life"
"We know" Peter sighed.
"We should hang out together more again, this is nice" he then added.
"True, it's so nice to talk about chocolatesexuals" James grinned, Mary throwing the packaging of her frog against his head.
"But seriously, it's been forever since I've seen you guys together" said Sirius with a pointed look at the girls.
Lilys eyes immediately wandered in Marlenes direction who looked away.
She felt awfull.
She couldn’t stand situations like this.
She couldn’t stand staying quiet...
"It's cause I'm stupid..." she said, taking a deep breath and watching Marlene blink in surprise.
"I wouldn’t quite put it like that Evans, if I remember correctly you were the best in our grade last year" Sirius teased and Lily rolled her eyes.
"Good, I wasn't stupid, I was mean, to Marlene. And I’m very sorry" she adressed Marlene, who looked away embarrassed.
"No worries, it's cool. It was my fault anyway" she said glancing at Mary.
"Mary!" Lily exclaimed, immediately guessing what had took place.
Mary was certainly protective...
Her friend raised her hands in defense.
"I didn't say anything wild. Just that you were a bit upset!"
Lily sighed.
"You guys are impossible..."
"It really was my fault though, I shouldn't have-"
Lily interrupted Marlene.
"No. I shouldn't have reacted like that. I'm sorry"
"Is one allowed to asked what this is about?" James asked frowning.
"Oh, I just asked something an-"
"Marlene helped me figure out I'm bisexual, that's all" Lily said out loud, holding her breath.
The looks on the others faces ranged from proud (Mary) and surprised (Marlene), to straight shook (James) and approval (Sirius).
"For real?" Peter asked, not unfriendly, just curios.
"I mean...well, I haven't figured it out one hundred percent yet you know, it's still a bit new and all" Lily fumbled with her words feeling her cheecks heat up.
Eventually she took a deep breath, lifting her gaze again to truly look at the others.
"But I do think so"
Sirius spoke first.
"Welcome to the team I guess"
Remus sighed in disapointment and Sirius turned to him.
"What?"
"Nothing" Remus answered.
"Either way, thanks for trusting us Lily" he then said and Lily smiled happily.
"Of course. You guys are my best friends"
A smile spread over Marlenes face.
"I kinda feel like a proud mother right now" she grinned and Mary laughed.
"Congrats. I can’t believe you leave me alone in the hetero team though" Peter smiled and Lily laughed.
"You're our honorary hetero" Marlene grinned, throwing an arm around Peters neck.
"Important too. You have to safe us from our queer nonsense" James grinned and Peter looked horified.
"I can save Lily and Remus, but the rest of you are hopeless..."
Mary laughed, throwing her head back.
"You guys can visit us in prison then!"
"Be aware of the queers!" Sirius exclaimed and James giggled.
The sun was setting behind them and Lily looked at Mary, capturing her gaze, as the sun made her glow in red orange lights.
Mary smiled at her.
'Proud of you' she mouthed and Lily smiled.
'Thanks' she mouthed back and Mary smiled too, so wide that she had to close her eyes.
Her Lily-Smile.
The one that belonged to no one else but Lily.
The camera clicked loudly in the quiet of the night.
It was cold outside, Lily could see their breath in the dark.
Marlene grabbed her and Mary by the wrist and pulled them along.
"Come on Lily, you can take photos of us later!" She whispered giddily.
"Why are we even here?" Lily asked looking back to the castle anxiously, as if expecting a teacher to chase after them any second.
But there was no one, the landscape surounding the castle dark and lonely apart from them.
"To go into the forest obviously" Marlene sighed.
"The forest?" Lily exclaimed, stopping dead in her traks.
"Oh come on now Lily, stop being such a good girl!" Mary grinned teasingly.
"It's not about being a good girl, do you know how dangerous the forest is? There’s a good reason why we're not allowed to go in there! And-"
"Yeah, but Peter spilled that the boys went into the forest more than once" Mary argued, dragging Lily along against her will.
"Who cares? They can go into the forest all they want, doesn't mean we have to be just as stupid!" Lily refused.
"But I don't want to be left behind. Before they gonna start feeling special because they did something we haven't, I'd rather check it out too!" Marlene grinned, helping Mary with dragging Lily.
"Come on guys, we'll get into so much trouble if someone catches us!" Lily whined.
"Sure, I bet teachers just love walking around in the forest for no reason in the middle of the night" Marlene said with a raised brow.
"You're just scared of the dark" Mary teased and Lily lifted her chin.
"What if I am?" She challenged.
Mary held out her hand, shrugging as Lily looked at it in confusion.
"Take it. I'll keep you safe against the dark"
Lily looked at her carefully, but couldn’t detect any sarcasm.
Mary looked at her earnestly.
Suddenly Marlene pushed Lily lightly, making her almost crash into Mary.
"Good idea" Marlene grinned as Mary stabilized Lily and grabbed her hand and Lily was ready to murder their friend.
Marlene however was already continuing her walk to the nearing trees.
"She's crazy! Absolutely crazy!" Lily complaint to Mary, trying not to act awkward.
But she really couldn’t help the heat crawling up her neck, with Mary holding her hand so causually, walking shoulder to shoulder with Lily, their legs stepping forward in the same rhythm.
Lily made sure Marlene was far enough, before whispering: " But seriously, what’s the plan if we get caught?"
Mary grinned.
"Detention"
They reached the outer line of the forest way to quickly, stopping right infront of it, looking into it wearily.
"We can still go back..." Lily mumbled.
"Nah. I've already planned out how we gonna tell the boys everything tomorrow" Mary grinned.
"It doesn’t even matter, who cares about the boys..." Lily sighed and Mary giggled.
"Already in the next stadium of your sexuality discovery?"
"I didn't mean it like that"
"Convincing when you grab my hand like that" Mary grinned and Lily noticed, how much she was clinging to her friend.
"Okay enough flirting, it's time kids" Marlene interrupted, Lily flushing while Mary smirked.
"Feeling lonely?" She teased and Marlene raised a brow.
"Next to you lovebirds for sure"
"Marlene!" Lily yelled and pulled Mary along towards the forest.
"Oh, suddenly you do want to go huh?" Marlene laughed hystericaly as she followed them.
"Whatever it takes to shut you up!" Lily answered, trying to sound brave, but she never let go of Marys hand.
The trees soon build a roof over their head and it got increasingly dark.
"These things are massive..." Mary mumbled, staring at the huge trunks in amazement.
"I wonder how long they've been growing here" Marlene, who had caught up, agreed.
The ground below their feet was uneven and Mary tripped, almost dragging Lily with her.
"Whoops, sorry!" She giggled, but Lily just moved closer, anxiously looking around.
"You're really scared?" Mary asked gently.
"No, I'm just pretending" Lily rolled her eyes sarcastically.
"Alright, alright, didn't mean it like that. But seriously, it's okay, we're together after all. And if these dumbasses made it out of here we'll do too hm?" Lily could hardly see Mary in the dark but she could just tell that her friend was smiling at her.
"Yeah yeah, let’s just get it over with..." she grumbled, happy that the darkness hid her red cheecks.
"I think we need to use the wands, otherwise we'll soon see nothing anymore" Marlene said from infront of them.
"But then we might attract god knows what" Mary mumbled, her voice a bit more weary than.
Marlene didn't answer.
In fact Lily couldn’t even see her anymore in the dark.
"Marlene?" She whispered.
It stayed quiet.
"Hey Marlene, where the fuck are you?" Mary asked, sounding equally anxious, but there was no answer.
Lily could feel her breath hitch.
"She was just here though" she whispered, desperately trying to make out her soroundings.
"I know" Mary agreed.
"Marlene! Hey, Marlene can you hear me?" She yelled into the darkness.
Her voice seemed to echo between the trees, yet nothing but silence answered them.
"What do we do? Mary, we need to go get a teacher!" Lily exclaimed, her heart beating fast as she thought about all the awful creatures that might have gotten Marlene.
"A teacher? Lily, we'll get into so much fucking trouble!" Mary answered equally scared.
"Who cares? Do you even know what kind of creatures live in here? What if...What if..."
Before she could continue a light was blinding them and an ear shattering scream sounded.
In pure panic Lily stumbled into Marys arm, while her hand with her wand extended, ready to attack anything that was coming their way, Mary doing the same.
But befire they could think of any spell a loud laugh made them stop in their tracks.
"Marlene..." Lily recognized.
Marlene was standing infront of them, wand glowing and laughing hysterically.
Mary groaned.
"Oh fuckyou, McKinnon!" She exclaimed.
"Look at you! You know if it wasn’t so funny it'd be cute!" Marlene laughed, wiping a tear from her eye and Lily noticed that she was still clinging to Mary like a little koala baby to it's mother.
Embarrassed she stepped away, but Mary didn’t even seem to care.
"If you ever do that again..." she threatend Marlene angrily.
"Then what? God you guys are so funny, calling a teacher!"
Lily thought that by now she'd probably reached tomato red from all the embarassement.
"Good to know you care more about getting in trouble than my safety though" Marlene said to Mary.
"Don't act like you wouldn’t do the same" Mary said with crossed arms, but Lily noticed that she avoided Marlenes gaze, a clear sign that she was embarrased.
"Maybe. But see, lights on and nothing happens. Apart from you guys taking your relationship one step further"
"Fuck you" Lily whispered, and Marlene made an almost proud face.
"You're spending to much time with us"
"Not like I have a different choice" Lily groaned.
"Remus?" Marlene shrugged.
"Then I'd have to hang out with James. So no thanks, that be even more trouble than you" Lily said pointedly and Marlene laughed, but suddenly her face turned ashen.
Lily didn’t even have time to ask what was wrong before she felt something cold and wet move past her ankles.
"Ehm...guys...did you feel that too?" Mary whispered eyes big.
"Yeah. Yeah I did" Lily whispered back, swallowing heavy.
"How does a quick jog back to the castle sound to you?" Marlene asked anxiously.
"Sounds good, I need to be more active anyway" Mary said.
And then they broke out in a sprint, Marlene at the front Mary grabbing Lilys wrist and Lily following her, till her hand slipped into Marys and they chased after Marlene through the darkness, their hearts beating in their chest, yet somehow Lily couldn’t help but giggle and the other two soon followed suit.
The camera clicked loudly.
Mary smiled happily at it, the birthday hat Marlene had given her earlier hanging a bit of to the side, the red matching the one of her blue red stripped shirt.
She wore some of Lilys hair clips in the same colors, making her glow.
Lily smiled.
"You're the prettiest birthday girl in this castle" she said proudly, putting the camera aside.
"I better be" Mary grinned.
"Can I open the present now?" She added, with a curios look at the tiny box Lily had given her.
It was wrapped in dark green paper and sealed with golden string and a wax stamp Lily had placed on them carefully.
"Yes, please" she smiled, hugging her legs nervously.
Mary gently broke the seal, starting to remove the string.
"A reason why I have to open it in the secrecy of our room?" She grinned and Lily shrugged.
"I wanted it to be special. Also the boys would ruin the moment"
Mary laughed at that, gently placing the paper of to the side and opening the tiny wodden box.
In it lay a slim ring on a red cushion, in shape of tiny daisys.
Lily held her breath, carefully checking Marys excited facial expression as she gently removed the tiny jewellery from it's box and studied it's fine details.
"Gosh, Lily, that's beautiful!" Mary sighed, tracing over the silver carefully.
Giddily Lily smiled, her heart jumping in her chest again.
"Daisys are the flower of your birthmonth, so I thought they’d be fitting" she explained.
"Seriously? I didn't even know that" Mary smiled impressed.
Then she held the ring in Lilys direction.
"You should put it on me"
Lily looked at her dumbfounded, but Mary nodded at her.
"You'll put it on me and I'll never take it of. It's like a promise. That we'll always stay together. If not physically, than mentally" Mary explained seriously and a warm feeling spread through Lilys chest.
"A promise..." she nodded quietly.
"Yes. Do you promise it?" Mary asked equally quiet.
"Yes. I'll always stay with you. I promise" Lily said solemnly and Mary smiled.
"I promise I'll stay with you too. Every step of my life!" And she gave the ring to Lily.
The metal had warmed up in her friends hands and Lily could feel her own hands shake, but she willed herself to lean forward calmly, gently holding Marys soft hand and carefully sliding the ring on her ring finger, swallowing heavily as she looked up at Mary who smiled so wide that she almost seemed to glow.
"Thank you Lily" she said and before Lily could answer she found herself in a big, tight hug.
She giggled against Marys shoulder, throwing her arms around the others neck.
"You're welcome" she grinned.
"Ugh, I'm so happy right now" Mary said, pulling away with a smile, looking down at her ring.
"I'm really proud of you, you know..."
Lily looked at her in surprise.
"Me? Why?"
Marys smile widened but she still avoided Lilys gaze.
"I don't know. I think you've really grown into yourself recently. Makes me really happy to see you like that" she looked up, locking eyes with Lily.
"I love watching you grow into the woman you'll become"
Lily looked at her with amazement, not quite sure how to answer.
Throughout all their years of knowing each other she had never heard Mary say something like that, never something so direct and honest.
"Thank you" Lily whispered and Mary smiled.
Suddenly Lily noticed the tears in her friends eyes.
"Are you crying?" She said in surprise, reaching out for Marys shoulders who just laughed, shaking her head.
"I don't know either..." she said, wiping the cornor of her eyes with her sleeve.
"What do you mean? What's going on?" Lily asked confused and Mary giggled.
"Don't look at me like that, I’m fine" she sighed.
"I'm just really, really, really happy to have you...I don't know how else to put it, that’s why I normally don't say things like that" she chuckled.
"I don't even know why, normally it's not hard to put my emotions into words, but with people who mean a lot to me I just can't get my mouth to open. But you know...I just really want you to know that...I really love you Lily, seriously" a tear ran down Marys cheek and Lily could feel tears form in her eyes too, her empathy taking her out as always.
"That's okay. I know Mary" she smiled, gently stroking her friends shoulder, but Mary shook her head.
"You don't. You'll never ever know just how much I adore you Lily Evans"
Then she wiped her tears away again and grinned her wide Mary grin, yet Lily couldn’t help but feel like it held an equal amount of happines and sorrow today.
"Look at me getting emotional again...I'm awfull" Mary laughed and Lily grabbed her hands.
"And look at me crying because of you...guess we'll be awful together"
Mary laughed.
"Yeah. That sounds great to be honest"
They sat quietly, looking at each other unsure, Lily feeling like now that words had dried out touch was needed, but she didn’t dare to do more than hold on to Marys warm hands.
Eventually Marlene made the decission on how to continue for them, coming into the room.
Surprisingly it wasn’t just Lily pulling away out of shame today, but Mary too.
Marlene blinked.
"I'm not interrupting anything right?"
Quickly Lily wiped away her tears.
"No, just got a bit emotional about the birthday and all..." she smiled.
"Ah yeah. Sure, I suppose..." Marlene nodded, brain clearly working on full speed to figure out the situation.
"Either way, the boys have set up some food. As a little celebration I guess. Want to come down?"
Mary grinned getting of the bed.
"Well as the birthday girl that seems to be my duty"
"Lily?" Marlene asked.
"Sure, I could use a snack..."
Afterallofthis, she added to herself.
The camera clicked quietly, capturing Mary and Sirius as they swung around at an ungodly speed to the loud music, filling the room.
Peter and Remus were sitting together with Alice, who was explaining some of the recent skills she had learned in Defense against the Dark Arts, while James, Marlene and a sneaked in Dorcas were heavily debating over something Lily asumed could only be Quidditch.
There was no real reason for the celebration, apart from the fact that they'd almost survived the school year by now, yet the group never said no to a little fun.
It was getting late however and Lily felt only half present, the recent stress of homework and studying finally starting to way down on her.
She felt the urge to go over and listen to Alice in hopes of getting some information on next years classes, but she felt way to cozy on the couch, from which she could look at all of her friends.
There was something comforting in just sitting and absorbing them, all just existing together in the same space and time, all allowing each other to just be.
To just share their very own precious selves with each other.
Lily sighed.
There was nothing on earth she would trade this for.
Mary had finished her dance with Sirius and came over to her, as always, like a magnet was pulling them together.
"Someone looks tired!" Mary grinned, flopping down next to Lily and wrapping an arm around her shoulder.
She looked stunning in her short lace top and long skirt, a dark blue hair hoop holding back her curls.
Lily could have kissed her then and there.
She blushed at the thought.
"Not like the others look better" she tried to distract herself, pointing at James who was very clearly nodding of every now and then.
Mary laughed.
"It's been a long week. To be honest I still have left over homework for tomorrow..."
"Mary!" Lily scolded, but her friend just shrugged.
"Who cares, I'll just copy it from you tomorrow before breakfast"
"And what makes you think I'll let you use mine?" Lily said, crossing her arms infront of her chest.
"You always do. I just have to beg you long enough" Mary grinned, lightly nudging Lilys side with her left fist.
Lily sighed, not knowing what to answer cause of cause Mary was right.
Marlene and her would always be allowed to use her homework, if Lily liked it or not.
That was just the type of person she was.
"Look, at least I listen in class. Better than the boys" Mary said apologedically.
"Remus and Peter listen pretty well to be honest" Lily argued with a smile.
"Yeah, and James and Sirius couldn’t even tell you what we talked about in class today" Mary pointed out.
"Cause their idiots. They only ever listen when they think it matters" Lily sighed.
"Well, their problem. One day they'll notice that more things matter than what their teenage selves thought" Mary laughed.
"Let's hope so. Otherwise they'll have a bitter awakening once their old" Lily sighed, watching Sirius drag James from his seat.
"Sad to say goodbye Ladys, but us handsome Gentleman have practice tomorrow and falling of the broom from tiredness would be unfortunate" he grinned and James took a bow.
Remus and Peter got up immediately, bidding their goodbyes.
"Look at them, can't even go to sleep without all four of them present" Mary chuckled as they watched the boys walk up the stairs.
"One mind, four bodies" Lily nodded.
"Ah that explains why they act like that...One brain for four bodies is quite little isn't it?" Mary grinned and Lily rolled her eyes with a smile.
"I'll walk Dorcas back to her common room yeah?" Marlene called from across the room and Lily nodded.
"Let's see how long she'll need for that 10 minute walk. I'll guess at least an hour" Mary whispered and Lily grinned, watching as the other two girls waved and disappeared through the entrance into the hallway.
"Just be happy for them, come on" she sighed, side eying Mary.
"Never said I'm not" her friend answered, getting up and stretching.
"Bed?" Lily asked but Mary shrugged.
"I'm not quite tired yet to be honest. You can go to sleep though if you want to"
Lily shook her head.
"I'll stay up with you"
Mary grinned.
"How sweet"
Lily leaned back, watching her friend as she walked over to the pile of Vinyls, looking through them.
"Put on something slow" Lily said and Mary laughed.
"Need a sleep lullaby?"
"Why not?" Lily laughed, getting up with a yawn.
Soon some slow music filled the room, Lily wasn’t quite sure wha the genre was, but she didn’t care much.
Mary danced over to her with a laugh, extending on hand playfully.
"A dance my lady?"
Lily grinned.
"But if course my dear" she agreed, letting Mary gently grab her hand and waist, while placing her hand on her friends shoulder.
They swayed around gently, hips slowly moving from side to side.
"I don't know what to do with my feet" Lily laughed.
Mary shrugged.
"Me neither. I never really learned how to dance"
She took a temptative step backwards, Lily taking one forward.
"Incredible!" Mary grinned and Lily giggled.
"I think we were meant for this"
"Forget being a wizard, let’s go for ballroom dancing" Mary suggested, as Lily almost stepped onto her foot.
"Perfect. Bet they’d love to watch us" she laughed.
"Of course. The others can bring posters. Weknewtheminhighschool!"
"Then Marlene will finally not be the only athlete" Lily agreed and Mary grinned.
"Perfect. Future planned"
They continued stumbling around the room, stepping on each others feet occasionaly, Mary humming along to the mumbled lyrics while Lily giggled uncontrolaby.
They hit the table, almost knocking it over and it took Mary all her energy to not just stop and bend over laughing.
"Lily, this is it!" She panted out.
"This is our calling, I swear!"
Lily threw her head back, face hot from all the dancing and laughing.
"For sure" she said, sounding equally out of breath.
"I probably look a mess right now"
Mary smiled.
"Never looked prettier"
Lily laughed, shaking her head.
"You're a bad liar"
"Actually I'm exellent when I do. But right now I'm speaking the truth"
And if she hadn’t held onto her so tight Lily probably would have fallen straight into whatever hell people who fell for their best friend went to.
"You're unfair" Lily sighed, trying to ignore how close they were.
"How so?" Mary smiled.
"Don't compliment me like that while slow dancing with me. That's just..."
"Mh?" Mary asked softly and the fact that she seemed so casual about this made Lily want to scream.
"I don't know. So..."
"Romantic?" Mary grinned and Lily swallowed.
"Yeah"
"Is romantic bad?" Mary asked and Lily felt like she’d just started the multiple choice question that would decide her future.
"Not necessarily" she said quietly.
"Then why should I stop?" Mary said quietly her eyes looking into Lilys so caringly.
"Cause your my best friend" Lily said.
"Can't I be both? Your best friend and your romance?" Marys breathing was fast, the only signal that she was just as nervous as Lily.
Others might have not noticed.
But Lily did.
Of course she did, this was her best friend after all.
"I don't know how" she whispered.
"Want me to show it to you?" Mary asked, equally quiet, glancing at Lilys face shyly.
Lily tried to breath calm.
"Yes" she said, and ignored her previous attempt, stopping her breathing all together as Mary leaned in and connected their lips gently.
It was a short kiss, but as Mary pulled away Lily could still feel the warm press of the others lips on hers, as if they were tattoed onto her now.
She had to remind herself to breath in, eyes glued to Marys.
"And? What do you think?" She whispered, seeming so genuinely nervous that it made Lilys heart race in her chest.
"I love it. I love you" she blurted out, immediately slapping her hand on her mouth, Marys eyes widened before forming into two crescents as she laughed widely.
"I love you too. Very much"
Lily swallowed, brushing her hair back in embarassement.
"As a...friend or..."
Mary grinned.
"As a friend. A best friend. And as a lover"
Lily couldn’t help the shiver running down her spine, Mary who still held her body smiling.
"Is that okay? Being best friends. And girlfriends?"
Lily felt tears in her eyes, but she smiled happily.
"Yeah. That's better than anything I ever dreamed of. And I've dreamed of much" she laughed nervously.
Mary looked at her for a second as if fully taking her in, before pulling Lily into a tight hug.
"Thank you" she whispered into Lilys hair.
"For what?" Lily laughed quietly, feeling Marys warm body against hers.
"For everything Lily. Every single thing"
* * *
Lily was sitting on her bed surounded by photographs.
It was a chaos of movement, even after all these years there were still moments in which the fact of moving pictures overwhelmed her.
Yet she treassured each of the photographs deeply.
Interesting about them was the fact that they clearly all centered on one person, a beautiful girl with a wide smile, wild curls, dark skin and a warm gaze in her dark eyes.
Mary Macdonald.
Gazing at the September sun, cheering enthusiasticly at a Quidditch match, doing her makeup, laughing in the cozy common room, sleeping soundly in her bed, eating her breakfast, running past the camera with a smile, looking around the Hogwarts grounds excitedly at night, with a birthday hat on and dancing around in circles with Sirius.
None of the pictures were particularly well done, the angles were weird and unprofessional, but Lily loved them still, feeling like they sucked her right back into the moment.
Carefully she opened the box she had kept in her suitcase all year long to reveal a red notebook.
It had beautiful golden patterns on it, depicting unicorns, dragons and phonixes.
She had bought it before the school year started, along with her magical camera, with only one thing on her mind.
Slowly she opened the book, pulling out a feather and some ink and began writing a note on the first page, one she had constructed over the entire year.
My dearest Mary,
I wonder what you'll think when you open this.
Will you be happy? I sure hope so.
Actually the thing I hope most, is that you'll find yourself remembering happy moments without regret.
That you'll maybe smile a bit while looking at a piece of our gorgeous yet brief youth.
Am I sounding dramatic?
I'm sorry, I can't help it.
I wonder who you will have become by the time you open this.
No doubt a strong beautiful woman and a talented witch.
Will we still talk about each other with a smile in our hearts?
I hope so.
Young people fall so deep yet depart so fast, so I hope that whatever will happen to us one thing will remain: the happiness we share about knowing one another.
Being each others lifeline.
Years pass quickly and when you look at this you might not even recognize yourself, but I wanted to share this with you, show you what I saw looking at you.
Maybe you'll still not know.
Want to know what I am seeing?
A girl, one who has a smile that can make the world shake from it's beauty, with a gorgeous voice, curls that always smell like the vanilla hairmask she uses, lots of glowing jewellery.
A girl who's always at the scene of the crime, but always gets away with it.
Who laughs and loves, particularly chocolate, who spills her cereal, who's best at transfiguration and sleeps through History of magic and always copies my homework.
Who keeps photos of her family with her at all times, who remembers everyone she's ever met and their birthday, who loves to dance and sing and who listens to every worry one could potentially have.
This is the Mary I know.
My Mary.
Who knows where we'll be in a few years.
Professional ballroom dancers?
Maybe you'll own a store, for clothes or vinyls?
You might teach someone, I bet you'd be great at that.
I hope I'll still be your best friend then.
Let me be out of my mind and hope I'll still be your girlfriend too.
It might be unrealistic.
Probably you're laughing while reading this.
But I still want to say it.
Cause no matter what happens next: Right now I love you Mary.
More than anyone in the entire world.
And one day you may call me a love of your youth and that's okay.
But know that I was serious.
I think you were too.
But who knows.
Maybe we'll open this together and laugh about little Lily.
Maybe we'll be happy and in love.
Wouldn’t that be nice.
I would love for it to go that way....
Love,
Lily
She took a moment to read over what she had written and to let the ink dry before nodding satisfied.
Then she turned the page and began gluing each picture into the book, one by one, treating each gently, like they were a precious treasure.
After she was done she closed the book and put it back into the box, finally using the lock she had kept in her suitcase pocket all year.
Then she got up and started packing.
Another year at Hogwarts was over.
They arrived at Kings Cross, the mood somewhere between happiness of finishing the longer part of their way home and the sadness of being seperated once more.
Sirius looked as pale as every year, Remus and James trying to cheer him up with some treats and nice words.
Marlene was fighting to get her suitcase down from the rags and Mary and Peter giggled hysterically.
Lily sighed.
She'd truly miss these idiots during the hollidays.
They waited till most people had left the train before making their way onto the platform too.
"I'll miss you guys so much" Marlene sighed as she gave Sirius and James a hug.
"Ask me..." Sirius said gloomyly, as he made his round, hugging them each goodbye.
"We'll write letters" Lily smiled.
"For sure! Let’s stay in touch" James followed Sirius example.
"Remus, Peter, you coming too? The girls surely want to do their annual four hour goodbye"
Marlene rolled her eyes, but none of the three denied the fact that their goodbyes tended to drag out quite a bit.
"Sure" Remus nodded and he and Peter made their round as well.
"Let’s chat soon" he added as he hugged Lily.
"Absolutely" she answered with a soft smile.
Way to soon they said far well, the boys disappearing between parents and students to quickly be gone.
Lily sighed.
"During the year I can't stand them, but hollidays without them are kind of dull to be honest" Marlene said, shrugging.
"Well, boys I suppose" Mary grinned.
"Boys" Lily nodded with a smile.
"Anyway, the three of us definitely have to stay in touch right? I need you guys to keep me updated on absolutely everything" Mary then said passionately and Marlene laughed.
"Sure. I'm afraid I won't do all that much but lie in bed though"
"And go on dates with Dorcas I suppose?" Lily suggested with a sweet smile and Marlene snorted.
"Yeah, yeah, I suppose. Same for you two though, right?" She answered smiling back at Lily equally sweet.
"Well, of course" Mary grinned, grabbing Lilys hand.
"This will be our summer!"
Lily laughed widely.
"Sure, you love birds" Marlene rolled her eyes, but she smiled warmly.
Mary noticed Dorcas leaning against the wall not far away and nudged Marlene.
"I think soneones waiting for you..." she grinned.
Marlene looked between them and Dorcas till Lily pushed her with a sigh.
"Go on! You won't see her in days!"
"I won't see you in days either" Marlene argued.
"And that’s why we'll stay in contact! Keep me updated on everything, remember?" Mary answered and Marlene grinned.
"You girls are crazy" she laughed, pulling them both into a hug.
"Let's make next year just as fun" she said, voice coming out mumbled between all the hair and Lily laughed.
"Even funnier" Mary grinned before they waved Marlene goodbye.
"How convenient. Just us two" She said, turning back to Lily.
"Almost as if it’s destiny" Lily said sarcastically and Mary laughed.
"Will your parents pick you up?"
"Yeah, they're probably waiting outside the station"
Mary nodded, biting her lip in hesitation.
"I...Mh, well, I'll miss you" she eventually said, starring at her shoes.
Lily sighed.
"Yeah. I'll miss you too. But we can meet up remember? Let's...not make this sad or I'll cry again"
At that Mary laughed, pulling Lily into another short hug.
"You truly made this year magical for me Lily. Seriously. I don't think I've ever had so much fun and...well just happiness overall with anyone" she said as she pulled away.
"Same for me. I mean, honestly all I did this year was think about you or be with you, or both. I don't regret it though" she smiled and Mary chuckled.
"Either way, I want to give you something" she continued, taking the box from the top of her suitcase and handing it to Mary who looked at her in surprise.
"What’s this?" She asked curiously.
"It's sort of like a time capsule. The lock is magical, you can basically set it to open after a certain amount of time" Lily explained, heart beating in her chest.
"And when will this open?" Mary asked, studying the lock interestedly.
"In ten years"
"Ten years? By then we'll have graduated and all!" Mary said with surprise.
"Exactly. I want it to be something special. Right now it’s just sweet, but in ten years I think you’ll truly enjoy it. Trust me"
Mary nodded, smiling at her.
"Thanks. I can’t wait to see it" she gave Lily a third hug.
"You do to much for me" she sighed.
"You deserve it all and more" Lily answered, burrying her face in Marys neck.
"I'm so glad I found you" she added and could feel Mary smile against her shoulder.
"Me too. Seriously. I can’t believe I'm one of the few people who get to live side by side with you" Gently Mary pulled away.
"It's an honour"
Lily smiled.
"Isn’t it funny? You get to live at the same time as me. I get to live at the same time as you...I couldn't even imagine life without you..."
"Good you don't have to. I'm right here" Mary smiled and held out her hand.
Gently Lily took it, slowly strolling over the platform, Mary right next to her.
"Mary?"
"Mh?"
"Let's always stay together yeah?"
Mary smiled.
"I told you once, I'll tell you again: I'll always be with you, always on your side Lily. Whatever happens next, I'm right by your side"
Lily smiled, holding Marys hand a bit tighter as they neared the exit.
"Yeah. And I'll be right by your side. Forever"
End