37
Part 37.
𝓙𝓾𝓷𝓰𝓴𝓸𝓸𝓴 𝓹𝓸𝓿:
I was just merely 8 one night when we had stayed late in appa's chamber. I was sprawled on the floor, an arm thrown beneath my head as a pillow. While Appa sat formally on his throne. His eyes were half-closed.
He was telling me a story.
"Achilles won the war, he won his kingdom, but he eventually lost his lover. He lost the only person he was deeply in love with. Was his win worth the loss of his lovers soul? Was his beloved worth losing for the kingdom who made him a Almighty king, Jungkookahh? "
I remember snapping my head at him, I was just 8, I wondered why would my father ask me about something I was not trained with. I was not a king by then nor did I had a lover to choose.
"Appa, of course it was worth it, it's better for one person to die rather then the entire kingdom. He did the right thing."
He had smiled then, ruffled my hair.
"It ws never worth it son, losing him made Achilles lose himself. He had died the very moment he had his lovers dead head fallen hopelessly, soulless on his lap. It was never worth it"
There were tons of questions whirling in my small mind then, whatever Appa said was not the same thing we had been thought while training.
Teacher had taught us,we warriors are born with a hard courageous shield and heart of stone, for whom there kingdom and there subjects are the prime priority. Teacher had told us to choose kingdom and our honour even if it was the last choice we had to make.
And now after years from that clueless playful night, when I am not a small 8 year Jungkook anymore but a big armed, strong warrior and king of this kingdom, I had made a choice.
And-
I had finally lost the only way I have been able to breathe. The only person I have ever loved eternally, My only Pearl about whom I had thought of every single moment since I had met him.
My only love.
Now that I am sitting here, near the window of my chamber watching at nothing but disappointment, after many years of my childhood passing by like a breeze, I realized the terrible choice I had made.
I had finally lost him ,cruelly.
And now that I was half of me, now that I was endlessly missing him, now that I felt dead, I had realised how much him and his presence had occupied my soul.
He was gone, I had let him go.
Now I know, Achilles too had made a wrong choice.
Appa was right, nothing was worth it, it was him who made my life worth everything.
Now everything just felt deeply agonizing.
There's was a sudden knock on the door and then it had opened for yeri to come inside, she walked slowly, her eyes red and swollen. It's just a day he had been gone, but it felt like years to every person he had left his piece of heart with.
Oh Pearl, how much had you love the people around you, so selflessly and so beautiful. That now the palace feels abandoned without you giggling and swooning around.
"Your Majesty, I heard you had declined to have food. Please have some. Your wounds are yet to heal and you need to rest better" I just nodded.
Yeri stood behind me nonchalant, her eyes boaring holes right on my back, I turned around at her.
Her features were undeniably soft, very much opposite to the rage she held in her closed knuckles. But her eyes are sharp with tears.
"Why did you let him go? "
For the next ten seconds I had held my breathe in order to not let my emotions flow around, I know why yeri was here.
I knew she would be here.
"I do not owe anyone answers Queen Yeri. I did what was best. For you, for my kingdom and for him as well"
Her voice is bitter with grief
"How could you have let him go? You knew he could not live without you. He loves you Jungkook"
Her words stab me painfully.
Yes he loved me , I did too. But was that enough? Sometimes love isn't enough, to protect, to save, to fight for. Love is never enough.
"I did what was best yeri. You should be happy you are here. Those people might have exploited you. They would have killed all the people who are breathing safe in there homes right now. "
Yeri does not flinch.
"You would have rather let them kill me Jungkook, then keeping me with this guilt beside you for the rest of my life. "
The sound that comes from me is hardly human.
"I did everything. I tried to keep him safe. I did everything I could do. But—but I could not choose him over my kingdom. You won't understand this, I don't want to make your understand anything either. Get out Yeri"
"You are the one who made him go." Yeri steps towards me.
"He fought to save you, he begged you to keep him with you, you could have fought for him too rather then selling him out Jungkook"
I turn around facing the window again. The shallows of my skin burn.
She was right.
I could have fought for him.
I buried my face in my hands. But yeri does not relent.
"You have never deserved him. I do not know why he ever loved you. You care only for yourself!"
She sobs.
"I had told you I will walk down as a Queen, I told you I'll leave you and you can be with him. Then why did you not choose him??? "
I snap back at her, I look at her with pure upsetting blow.
"I sent you letters, I told you I was leaving. You sold him. How cruel you can be to the person who have loved you Jungkook ? "
The breath rasps in my throat.
Yes, she had sent me letters, Too many in numbers to even read them all. But I had read few of them.
And I freshly remember her words , I had traced them painfully with my bleeding fingers.
And these were not the words I had died reading too.
She was lying.
Was she?
____________________________________________
"You are the bravest among all Jungkook, the only one I trust with my life and my everything. You amaze me everytime , my Son. You are the most prestigious warrior I can ever be gifted by God. "
I had lifted my head with pride, another war and new blooded crown I had won for the king. Courtiers and my armed trops around me roared my name in victory , flower petals now under my feet where I had pricked needles in last night. I gleamed with pride.
King looked at me with love and affection, I was his only trusted and no one would ever do this for him if not me.
King stood up, his eyes prided as he asked me to choose any of his kingdoms and jewels. I declined all of it.
I never wanted these things, I had all.
The only way I could have been happy was to let me go back to my kingdom. I wanted to lay my head on my mother's lap as she would have sang for me so I'd sleep after months.
But then the king had smiled, and announced his precious gift for me—
I was no one but his pawn to agree with his decision.I had rested my hand on my chest accepting whatever the king had planned for me.
"kim Taehyung" King said.
A Paramour A mistress they called him.
People around me had gasp with loud lewd sounds, just his name made people gwak with surprise, and I won't lie, I was highly excited and impressed with the heavy influence and effect this paramour had on all of them.
I had stared up at the door opening with dramatic trumpets, maids had rushed in with rose petals swooning in cold air.
When he walked into the court , people were aware. They felt his presence. They fed off his energy. He was esoteric, distinctive, different. His aura commanded intrigue and people would watch and stare in awe. He was cold but he was beautiful, inside and out.
And then,
Amidst of the blood and dirt the Male stood there in front of me and glowed as if he was made up of glittering gold and pure pearls.
He walked in with slow hesitant steps, his eyes down wavering with worry, his fingers grasping the cloth on his body with fear, but despite he stood facing the cruel world like the warrior he was.
He was beautiful, his skin a tone of honey, his hair beautiful black curls and gleaming. His orbs beautiful , in the twilight of his eyes I could see the pureness and his soul beautifully wrapped.
I was in awe of the man standing in front of me. I never knew there was anyone this beautiful existing before.
He was so beautiful more beautiful then the pearl earrings and the diamond neckpiece he had wore.
He was quite a Pearl himself, glowing miraculously, born to be a beautiful pearl from a messy trapped shell.
He was pearl to me the moment I had my eyes on him.
Mine only pearl.
He looked more gorgeous then those filthy diamonds and jems, I'd never compare those little stones with the beauty this man had.
People were talking behind me endlessly staring at the man who had been gifted to me, but none of it I could hear, because I was enchanted.
I was enchanted with how he looked delicate petal but also a very strong man I had ever met.
I was indeed enchanted to him.
Then,
" But he is used, he have already warmed many of king's bed, you still want him like this?? Somebody's used litter?? " One of the Jealous courtier said and the said delicate male shuddered at the words.
One moment I was aimlessly staring at my pearl while the next moment I was agitated with pure anger, the same rage I felt when I was on war.
This was not supposed to be right, why was I angered when a mere envious dirt of a scum man had called my pearl with degrading names???
The feeling of towering rage in my veins surfaced like the thunderbolt. The sudden urge of ripping that mans shreds of flesh desired me.
How did he even dared to say a word against Taehyung?
I roared back at him snapping him shut in his damnn place.
Pearl had then snuggled fit in my arms like the very much puzzle, puzzle which would never fit with anyone else. His small smile, his fiddles had me endeared with adoration for him.
And suddenly I was fine, suddenly I was warm. Suddenly my fire was watered by him.
May be he was water to my fire.
Since childhood to the age I was now, I had never felt my own heart thumping like it would break free from the cage, but it did when I thought of this particular beautiful man.
I gulped and parted away.
I had to keep my distance, I could never afford to feel like what I was feeling exactly right now.
But how would I do that? If his mere smile kept melting for him?
Our way back to the main palace was quite, he stood beside me, walking calmly not even letting a stone be pressed at his weight. I stared at him, I tried to make conversation somehow, but he would just nods or hum at my every word and I was mind blown.
Taehyung was not the first paramour gifted to me I had plenty of them in my harems. Each of them wanted to be the only one to me , each of them wanted to attract my attention and seek something out of it, but pearl just followed me as he had oath too.
Without asking for anything, without wanting to be anything.
My lips had curled into smile.
"It will take me just few minutes, I will join you after I wash up. Will you wait for me? " His soft brown eyes hesitated to look up at me, but he did softly from behind his curls
"Yes, yes my honour. I will be waiting" This was the first time he had spoken anything to me and his voice was soft but a tiny bit laced with roughness.
Once I came back, king and his royals had already settled for the meals, they all bowed to me , but my attention instantly fawned over to Pearl who shifted from his position walking far away from where he was supposed to sit.
He was supposed to sit with me, beside me.
I had called him out loudly, my voice strained but I was trying to keep it soft, I would never want to scare him away from the roughness I was made with.
PEARL
"Won't you sit with me? Where are you going Pearl? " Jungkook had said and taehyung was deep shade of red
"I do not fit in with royals my honour, king won't like me sitting—" his pink cheeks were adorable, but his eyes were the prettiest sight to behold.
"I'm here pearl, no one dares to say anything to you. I will take care of it." He had smiled then, and I had realised after his pretty eyes, his smile would be my next favorite feature of him I would treasure.
♡
𝓣𝓪𝓮𝓱𝔂𝓾𝓷𝓰'𝓼 𝓹𝓸𝓿:
I watched the flower bloom at the basking sun of the dawn. The last petal spreads to reveal the full bloomed rose, the sunflowers twists itself towards the rising sun. I smile, taps the petal before I noses the surface, inhaling the soft scent of the roses and the flowers blooming.
It was a new day again, and my Third day since I was here, I sit down on the ground as I watch sun rising up from behind those waterfall clad mountains.
I lay then on the grass, my hands beneath my head. I stare mindlessly around the mist and feel the wet dewdrops against my skin. My heart stutters inside, melancholy settles on me like a sudden change in weather. The kind of sadness that is intangible. Like the presence of an ache where I can't pinpoint exactly where it hurts, I just know it does.
I was not with Jungkook anymore, I was miles away from him, so far that his memories would not reach me either.
But the love I had for him made me stare at the lonely sky all night, I had not slept an eye. It was hurting now, his love was hurting me ruthlessly.
Sun spreads its rays all over the horizon, the stream of water flow with heavy chattering sound but it still feels lonely, beyond lonely I would say.
I look over to were I hear footsteps appearing near me.
Hyung walks towards me with his infamous smile. He lay downs beside me at a safe distance. He has been nothing but so sweet towards me that it feels too good to be true, but for now I accept his undivided softness.
Silence surrounds us first then he speaks
"I had asked my husband out for marriage over there" He points at the mountain with waterfall.
He smiles sadly
"Underneath the waterfall he had kissed me and cried for hours. How silly he looked with that puffed eyes and red cheeks." He laughed loudly, I smiled with him.
"I had fell for him so bad that, I forgot that if he leaves me alone, I won't be able to get myself up again angel. "
His eyes tears up as he slips through series of his past memories
I will never understand why the universe make one fall for the other and other to fall for another. Why would universe take away the people we learn to live for.
"Did we both fell for wrong person hyung?? " I ask him softly.
He smiles again.
" Sometimes I feel yes, We did loved wrong people . But rest of the time I just know he was the only right person in my life. If not him then who angel? "
I nod
"Someone who would never break us like they did? " My eyes flicker with tears.
"If he loved me, he won't hurt me hyung. If he loved you, he wouldn't had cheated on you. They were wrong. They were the wrong people we fell in love with. We need to just accept that they left" My tears strolled down my cheek mixing with the dewdrops on grass.
"Angel" He asked, I hummed.
"Do you think they must be hurting too??? Do you think yoongi will come back, if I beg him to come back? "
I sobbed
"I won't be able to say no if Jungkook comes asking for me hyung, I'm so weak for him now. I hate him with all the love I have for him"
We both stay there tearing up with memories and then laughing at how miserable we both sound.
He let's me cry, I let him be free.
We let each other love our lovers in memories for the last time then. I do not wish to dwell on the day he sold my dignity off, remembering it just makes me cruel which I never wanted to be for anyone.
We stay silent then, we fall in love with the Early sunrise instead.
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Firstly, I MISS YOU ALL!!
How r you all? Doing good? I hope u guys r fine and eating and resting well.
I have finally made a update after thinking and plotting many different plots. I have come up with one. I hope u all enjoy it.
I will clear few things out tho for avoiding confusion
The chapters from now on will have dual pov. ie. Taehyung as well as Jungkook.
There will be half part of Jungkook memory too which I will UNDERLINE in the start.
In this chapter The underlined part is from 1 chapter if you all can remember it . I will give u guys a little of poc of Jungkook from first chapter too so u all can get his pov better.
Taehyung's pov will be solely in PRESENT!!
I hope this won't confused u much.
Let me know if u all have any thing to ask about this!! I clear it before we move ahead with the plot!!
LET ME KNOW UR VIEWS!!!