Part 36
Part 36
𝓣𝓪𝓮𝓱𝔂𝓾𝓷𝓰 𝓹𝓸𝓿:
As soon as the auction ends, king choi gathers all his bidded money and with a victory smirk thrown at Jungkook he drives off for his kingdom, he oaths to not come back for Jungkook's kingdom himself and he will leave them alone.
He glance at me for a one last time and I could feel his dirty eyes swoon over me, I retracted back and tried to ignore the looks as much as I could.
"Angel, you should go and get ready, get all your stuff, I'll be waiting down here" Jimin hyung says and I nod softly.
There's no exchange of any words more then that, I don't feel like we have anything to talk about, its just what he wants me to do and what not. I won't be crossing my limits this time it costed me a heartbreak when I did last time.
I walk back to my room for the first time after all the fiasco, I restrain myself from glancing at anyone or even making any conversation on the way, pity and sympathy was the last thing I had wanted from them.
I entered my chamber and it's all ruined everywhere, huge bed was plunged upside down, curtain burnt, my wardrobe was all mess, all clothes were torn, my piano was broken into two half parts. It was nothing like the room I had made memories in, rather all my memories were trapped and been suffocating in here now.
I snapped out of my thoughts, gathering myself from all the places I was withered and I started to pack things that I had to take back with Jimin hyung.
There was nothing left anymore if to being honest, with all my clothes Already burnt, I just packed few of my fresh laundry clothes that I had kept for Scenting in inner room, they were untouched there still.
I took some things which I deeply was connected with, few of my books that I have been reading, few poems I had wrote for him, brooch that he had bought me, the sword with blunt ends we practised for hours and some of his memories I had painted on the wall of my chest.
I packed them all one by one, shattering with every thought. With each of his word stabbing me back to back.
I left the room bleeding, not glancing at it back anymore.
As soon as I stepped outside I saw Jungkook's chamber. The gaurds stood firm, few of them were new, I was not able to recognize them at all.
I breathe heavily as I walked towards them.
They bowed to me.
"Is his Majesty inside his chambers? "
They nodded sternly.
"Can you let him know Paramour Kim Taehyung wants to meet him" They glanced at each other, sharing looks and then one of them eventually walked inside his room.
Minutes certainly felt like hours, when the gaurd came back and he opened the door of his chamber wide open for me.
"You can now go inside" I bowed back respectfully and entered inside.
Jungkook's room was nothing less then what was mine, his chambers were highly destructed, blood splashed all over the place, white walls painted sheer red with cuprous blood stains.
I scanned the room before my eyes froze where he stood still, facing the window, his eyes still outside.
I walked inside slowly, I stood just few steps away from him when he turned back.
His face morphed with guilt and things I was not interested in reading anymore, his eyes were watery but still holding his emotions very firm.
He stepped one step closer to me and then moved four steps back, he tried to word his concerns but then again he stood there eating his words himself waiting for me to break the defying silence.
"Here, take this" I inched my hand forward.
Since a week I had known Jungkook was brutally Injured I had called some of our highly known vaidyas and asked them to help me make ointment for him.
"Just came here to give you ointments, Had made these for you, use it. I don't want them to go waste. " I tried to voice out as sternly as I could.
It was difficult, then what it looked like to hate him personally, when all my insides where melted for this man with uttermost care and love, and that still stayed inside me.
He moved ahead and took them from me, his thank you felt very dead to me, his words fumbled and very broken as they were recited.
I saw him hesitating then, his eyes flickering from my face to the door.
"Are you leaving? " He fumbled.
The scoff I let out then was unreasonably loud and cruel.
"As if you were not the one who told me to leave ,my Majesty" He shifts back, hurt with the venom I pour out.
Moment of silence engulfed us, it also spared me some time to stare at his face and to scan if he had any deeper cuts, to see if he was alright.
We stood there in his chambers so still, so wordless, it felt like a betrayal to reveal even a little bit of our character.
I loved him dearly, but what he did to me broke me very much to the parts I felt impossible to heal. I knew I would need him to heal , rather only him and the fact that I can never have him again close to me made me sick more.
Standing here right now, I realized I was not a whole person anymore, I don't think I'd ever be again. Parts of me died while loving him and fighting for the love I thought we both had for each other.
"I'm sorry" He said, his voice low and groggy.
I smiled sarcastically
"How many times are you going to be sorry Jungkookah? Sorry For how many hurts you gave me? How many times will I let you walk over me and then take you back with a mere sorry?"
He took all the hate I gave him with his eyes glistening and his head low, his shoulder were shivering ,the urge of hugging him close and soothing him was intensified inside me.
But I held all that inside me.
I had no idea how do I protect myself from the hurt and betrayal my own people give me , people whom I loved, people who said they loved me too.
My desperate hands reaches over him to clutch his collar roughly.
"Why did you do this to me Jungkook?? Why did you not choose me??? I told you to choose me, no??? "
"I begged you, I begged you this time to choose me, Jungkookahh look here"
I pulled him closer, his eyes were on mine, they were blank now, almost with no emotions, as if he had nothing in them, the glistening stars that I loved were gone. He was not the Jungkook I knew anymore. His eyes looked at me as if he didn't know who I was either.
My lips wobbled with the flashing memories, tears unstoppable .
"Why would you not choose me?" His shivering hands clasped mine .
"There's was nothing else I could do pearl—"
"Shut up, just shut up" I Whimpered
"Don't ever call me that again Jungkook, never. " I sobbed loudly.
"You had to make a choice!!!! You said you loved me, how did you not choose me then???? " I pulled him closer, he swayed like wind.
"You said you would leave everything for me behind and run away with me Jungkook" I jabbed my finger angrily on his chest.
"I trusted you, I fooly, blindly trusted you. I loved you. And you broke me again Jungkook. Where did I go wrong?? "
He winced, but said nothing. He knew he had lost me.
He did it himself.
My head heavy and tired, I rested it on jungkook's chest.
"You had to fight for us, why did you abandoned me alone? "
"How can you not need me, when I'm breathing you to stay alive? Why would you even leave me when I am not myself anymore? I am living in you, I was learning to love me through you Jungkookie"
It took me hours to realize I was crying like I was mourning for the lost love.
I was making up for the time we had left with each other.
I shifted back from his warmth.
"I'm raged, and I still love you. How fool a person in love must be?"
And then I said things I never wanted to say to him ever, but I did. I wanted to hurt him even more then what he did to me.
" I hate you Jungkook, I hate you for giving me evey thing that I thought I deserved and then snatching it from me to bring me back to reality, I hate you to make me feel like a bed warmer, a whore"
"I was just that after all ,no? " Something in his eyes snapped, he moved forward holding me.
"No, no stop. You are not it. You are not just that. "
"You said it yourself, you called me just a paramour to you" I looked up in his eyes.
"Jungkookah, if you loved me, why would you not say a word when those men were degrading me and calling me names? How were you sitting there just looking at those men touching me and eying me? "
His eyes teared up.
"One thing I surely learnt from you was to respect myself and to maintain my self esteem. You broke that today. You made me feel miserable and vulnerable. May be I did that to myself, If I had never loved you, I would have been just fine, no? "
He nodded apologetically with that
"It was an degrade to my honour and I would never forgive you for that. Will never forgive you for what you have done to me Jungkook. You were no one to make a decision on my life and let any man have me worth for some money. "
I stepped back with that, he was hurt, I could see his throat throbbing and his eyes tiredly staring at the lone ground. His shoulders were Sloughed and his chest rising and falling rapidly. I had hurt him enough.
Watching him Miserable gave me no pleasure but immense hate towards my own self.
I stepped back steps when he looked back at me.
"I-I will come drop you to your chariot" He said tiredly.
I paused in my steps.
"Don't, no need. I don't want to see you ever again. This was the very last time we were going to be like this, and it's done. I don't want to see you again Jungkook" He snickered back.
His eyes flickering fast, his panick was evident even through his breathe.
"Tae"
"Perhaps it's true, I don't deserve nice things, may be I am paying for the sins I don't even remember. Loving you have only gave me hurt and betrayal Jungkook, I don't wish myself a miserable life. I deserve to be happy too, and I feel until you keep showing up in my life I won't ever be happy. So please do not come to see me again. This is a final Goodbye Jungkook "
I sobbed loudly, I had never imagined there would be a day I would have to walk away from him, the only person whom I loved for the very first time in my life.
He hiccupped, he walked forward in urgency, dashing towards me. His hand hit the bed pole and the ointment bottle from his palm shattered on the ground.
He still moved ahead, my eyes traveled to the now red floor which was freshly covered with Jungkook's blood who had stepped on them
"Tae, please listen. Don't say that please" He cried. His hands begging me to stay a little longer, to listen to him little longer.
But I was sacred.
I was scared I would fall for all his lies again , I was scared I will fall in his love again and he would not.... He would not fall for me again.
He stumbled with glass pieces stuck up in his veins. And I moved two steps backwards. My heart was heavy, I was worried. He was hurt and I was not there anymore to help him out. He was in pain.
I was reason for his pain.
"Let's not hurt each other again Jungkook, let's not break each other again. I hope in other alternate universe, we are happy and together. But in this, we are not meant for each other. We cannot be with each other "
He stopped on his way. Aggressively mumbling No
I turned dashing towards the door, before he would reach me.
"Goodbye, live happily my Jungkookie, take care of your family. Take care of yeri, she loves you. I hope you find your happiness and live a healthy life. I hope you forget my presence and move forward with your life. It ends here Jungkook."
" Goodbye" I mumbled my last word like a slow breeze
I rushed outside, without glancing back even once, as I ran throw the corridors I could hear the glass shattering behind me in his chambers, I could hear his maniac yelling and loud cries.
But I choose to leave everything behind and walk as far as I could from him. I didn't wanted to stay back anymore, not when he didn't needed me there anymore.
Not when he himself, let me go.
I practically skipped steps as I ran towards my Chariot in garden.
Everyone had gathered there, Jungkook's father and mother had greeted me with cries and told me how sad they were, but there smiling faces I couldn't forgot. They had forgotten me when they were celebrating Jungkook choosing yeri over me.
I wondered if there kindness towards me was ever real.
Yeri cried as she hugged me for good Ten minutes, her maid had to pull her apart from me.
I had a urge then to look up at Jungkook's room and to see if he was there looking at me leaving him behind. To see if he was smiling as I left. But then there was a hand wrapped around my shoulder protectively.
"Let's go angel, it's gonna black out soon. " Jimin hyung said with a soft smile
I just nodded.
"Jimin shii please take care of him, he is like my own son" Jungkook's mother came ahead Caressing my cheeks.
Jimin hyung then laughed loudly and something evil in him.
"Eomeoni, how many sons are you going to make out of some stupid relationships? " I gasped with his words.
This way he never had spoke with anyone, Jungkook's eomma Whimpered almost losing her balance.
Her husband stood firm behind her holding her close to her chest.
"Mind you words king park" He growled.
Jimin hyung bowed
"I'm sorry, but is it false that I am saying? " His smirk deepen
"You have Two Sons, you love one of them" Her face morphed with pain
"Jungkookie. Eomeoni I'm talking about Jungkookie. And second one"
She clasped her hands in front of him, mumbling incoherent words.
"Second one is safe with me, our taehyungie. My angel. You don't have to worry about him. " He smiled with poker face.
" Worry about your precious son Mrs. Jeon. Like you have always did. No need to look out for some made up relations. "
He held my hand then, took me towards the chariot guiding me inside it.
Once I was inside, he tapped the space beside me and I curled in the corner.
He jumped inside my big chariot, sitting with me.
He stared outside.
"We'll leave. Thank you for your polite hospitality . Although it was the worst I had ever experienced tho. Never mind, well take your leave. " He said rolling his eyes.
He looked back inside, curtains closing behind him, his face serious and disgusted.
The chariot started to move, there was a big lump of anxiety in my guts, I was leaving. I would never see Jungkook again. We were over.
I will have to learn to live without him and move ahead with the new life I was provided with.
"Angel"
I jerked back, and stared at Hyung.
"I know this must be the worst and the most difficult time you have to go through. I bought you, I'm sorry you had to get that tag. "
He smiled apologetically, I nodded him fine.
"But you are my angel, something about you just makes me care for you as my own family, which I never had" His hand traveled my head patting softly.
"I just want you happy, So tell me Do you want me to leave you with your eomma and appa? Or at any friend of yours? You are free angel. I make you free to be yourself"
I stared at his face, he genuinely looked cared , I didn't know if I had to be emotional or sad, he wanted me to go to my parents— only if I had one.
I never had friends, I had no one except Jungkook, who had sold me out where else was I supposed to go??
He was my only home.
Was this how Freedom was???? Stucked in the battle I could never get out of it.
"My parents sold me when I was young to be a paramour, I never made friends. My only home was Jungkook and now he left me. So no hyung I have nowhere to go. I would like to go with you, if you allow" My voice was flat and stiff.
He hissed
"God, parents are shit. Mine were same too. I can understand you. Nevermind, you have got me. Let's go home okay? " His crescent moon smile adorned his face.
I nodded.
He said his kingdom was not much far, we would be there by Early morning in his kingdom.
I stared outside, as the trees and flowers passed by us. Sun had set down to make a beautiful orange sky. All birds returning home to there families.
"Why did you bought me hyung? " I asked him randomly on the way.
"I told you angel, hyung will be there always for you. Hyung will protect you."
He pinched my cheeks.
"Sleep now my angel. "
Next morning when I would wake up, I'll be too far gone from him and his shadows, I'll be all on my own, wandering Clueless. From tomorrow, I won't have my moon to stare at and my Jungkookie whom I loved dearly.
Next chapter mostly would be Jk's pov!!!!