Part 29
Part 29
𝓣𝓪𝓮𝓱𝔂𝓾𝓷𝓰'𝓼 𝓹𝓸𝓿
"Yeri, she knows about us" I mumbled, there's a thick knot dreaded in my throat.
I feel Jungkook staring at me, I grip his arm more firmly.
"Yeri saw us, when we were dancing, she figured out everything"
I hear him hiss, I press my arm over his hand and try to rub it over his, in few seconds the friction between our skins, makes him warm.
He gulps. I look at him and he brings his hand on face, he covers it and shake his head aggressively.
There's a sting in me, what is he going through?? What must have he went through silently!???
"So that's how I ended up hurting her too? " He laughs
"God, I'm so evil"
No he is not.
How do I tell him?? I have watched him smiling and crying and sulking and blushing, he is nothing evil.
Under his scary scars I have saw the melting child, under his rigid muscles I have saw him withering.
How do I tell him, he cannot blame himself for what his heart desires.
How do I tell him, he is so beautiful inside and out? I have read him.
He is just a man with wrong choices.
His heart choose a very wrong person who he loved
I was the wrong choice, that makes me evil, ain't it?
"I have killed so many people, I have had there heads cut, but—it never hurt like this tae. " He shakes from his core.
He shifts around curling up in my arms, I hug him back gladly.
His forehead is firm on my shoulder.
"I hurt her too. "
I caress his back
"We did hurt her, there's no going back. You know, when I went to talk to her, she was there standing with my favorite strawberry pie"
I sob a little
"She still cared about me, she should have slapped me, yelled at me, thrown me out of this palace, exiled me forever. But she still was trying to understand me, understand you. She was still trying to understand us. That hurt me so much. "
Jungkook nods
"She was always like that, forgiving."
I nod back
"I don't want her to forgive me easily though, I will talk to her. I will tell her everything myself"
"Yes, you should"
That night, we both stayed with each other, we talked about things very randomly, like we did back then.
He forgot, we had to go through a lot of misery, and I let him forget that.
I do not wish to see those stars glazed eyes of his to loose there shine, so I let those thought sink in me.
I can leave with Miseries, if it ment to watch him smile a bit more.
Among the things we talked, we never in once talked about what kind of relationship we had anymore.
We never in once brought that up, because we knew, we were at loss of words. We were everything for each other in a way, but to the world we were nothing. We completed each other, but yet we were just another of a incomplete humans in love.
The next afternoon I trailed around the palace finding traces of yeri and Jungkook, that's when I came to know, Jungkook had to attend a important meeting with king, it was something about the war.
Something about the neighboring kingdom trying to attack us, I had my heart in my throat.
What good war ever have done to humans???
It had always taken away the humanity from people, it had made so many children mourn over there dead mothers and women wait for there husbands, who are gone forever.
War have did nothing but destroyed us from roots.
I ignore the heavy feeling of letting Jungkook go on a war, it always affected me. It scared me.
I let myself walk through garden towards the kitchen
Then I find yeri there , I walk inside.
I just know, she would walk away from me, she would ignore me and hate me for rest of her life.
And I have to live with that.
"Tae, come. There's some pork and rice, you missed lunch, you must be hungry" She says.
For a infinitesimally moment I thought I had dreamt of yesterday in dreams, it was like walking back time and finding everything just at place where it was.
Why was she so calm?
I tried to find the discomfort in her, I tried to see her broken, but guess she was way too broken to not feel anything.
She looked just fine.
"Yeri? "
She hummed
I sat across her on the dinning table she served me like she did always.
"Here, have it. It's not spicy. "
I nodded, I had no idea what to talk
Pork was delicious, but it was difficult for me to swallow even one grain inside me.
I felt my bile rising up
"Yeri? Are you okay? "
There was silence for good 5 minutes.
She looked at me and smiled.
"No"
God
"I am not " She turned around
"How can I? "
" How can I, when my husband whom I had loved for years, for whom I had given my entire life, for whom I have waited every night to come back home from wars safe, confesses to me that he loves someone else" Her smile dims
"How can I be okay, Tae? "
Her words cut me sharper then the knife.
"I am not fine, I'm shattered to my core . And I—"
A livid tear slips of from her eyes to her cheeks.
"And I want to hate you so much tae. "
I whimper .
She wants to hate me.
She should
I deserve it.
"You, you in all people I trusted"
She sit on the chair across me
"You were my best friend tae, I told you about how much I love him, I told you at the times when I was even getting ready for him, now it feels like I made a fool out of me"
I shake my head aggressively
I yell out, NO!!!, but then I realize, it never came out of my mouth. I was crying by then.
She walks up to me, and sit on a chair beside me.
I shudder
She is going to slap me now no??? I will take it. I have to.
She will curse me, I'll take that too. I deserve it.
"Why would you do that me tae????"
I see her lips wobble
" You are a Mistress!!! I made you feel homely more then you even deserve!!"
"Why would you do that , to me? "
My heart sank with every word she says.
Mistress
I get the meaning of it now.
I feel it creeping inside me
I feel those words eating me up alive.
"You broke my home, you made Jungkook fall in love with you, when you knew he was married" She yells loudly
I whimper, I try to form words
"No"
"No, yeri, I had no idea, I never knew he was married. I would never do that to anyone yeri. Please I'm sorry. "
I try to hold her hand but she sweeps it away
"I got to know he had wife when I came here. I swear I—"
"And you still stayed??? You still stayed by our side for what? "
I don't know what to answer her
What was I supposed to do? Walk away? I was gifted to him and I was his companion, I had promised him, I would stay by his side....till he wants me to stay.
"I'm sorry" that's best I could say
"You are filth, you broke a happy family tae. You know what such disgrace act is called right???? "
A homewrecker
A whore
I know what it is called
"I hate you" She says out loud
"You took my love away from me, you broke me tae. I hate you."
I cry out loud.
"You betrayed me, you backstabbed me, I hate you so much"
I tell her to stop
But she says again
"You are a homewrecker"
There's a loud shriek I let out as I cry like I have never before.
I was scared for those words for all my life, only to be called out that by my best friend.
I cry like I saw my own death.
My shoulders hunch as I let it out, and then she holds my hand. She squeeze them.
Her hands leave mine, and they reach my cheeks cupping them.
Next she is staring at me, her eyes blood red, she looks more hurt then me. She rubs of the tear from my eyes
"Shh, it's done. It's over. "
"People are going to call you a homewrecker, they are going to say things I just called you. You need to be strong. You cannot let them hurt you tae"
I feel like my heart just stopped
I furrow my brows.
She moves forward and hugs me.
Somehow I hug her back tightly
"Please don't let people, say these things to you. You are not a homewrecker, you never betrayed me. But you will have to go through this all."
She patts my back
"It's never love, if we are not fighting for it you know. You have to fight for it, you need to make yourself strong and listen to people calling you all this bad words everyday, once they know about you and Jungkook"
" That's all what you get for loving him, are you ready for it? Can you do that for you and Jungkook? "
I detach myself from her.
"Why? Why are you telling me this??? Yeri stop Caring for me. You should—"
"You should slap me, you should say more of those words, you should fight me!! Why are you telling me to be strong for Jungkook?? You are his wife, I'm nothing!!! You should fight me , you should call me out names—"
She cupps my face again. Our foreheads touch each other's
"I can fight hundreds of men and women who wants Jungkook tae, trust me, I can go on a war with them. But how am I supposed to fight with that one man whom Jungkook wants? "
There's a feral thought inside me that gives me rage.
I feel like burning the world and turn it down to ashes.
Why????
Why???
Love is supposed to make us strong, then why do it have us so broken beyond repair????
Look at this woman.
Look at her telling me to be strong for mine and Jungkook's love, but what about her then?
She then looks at me and smiles.
"As his wife, I have owed for his happiness tae. And I'm just looking out for what makes him happy. And It's you. It were always you"
I shake my head
"You are his wife" I say
She laughs
"I wish I was not" she says
"I wish I were you. I wish I was his lover, then he might have loved me like he loves you" Her words sink inside me.