Chaos Over?
“I know it is almost possible but we cannot go on living live this and fighting friends. I can’t let someone get hurt again like Tony did.” Steve pointed out to Spiderman, Deadpool and Luke Cage. “This has to come to an end. I think the death of Bill Foster, however sad it was, can be used as a counter argument. Creating clones of super humans, gods for that matter, is against the law. We have advantage, they did a lot of against-the law stuff to prove themselves right. They also kidnapped and almost kill Tony.” Steve added, grimacing to the memory of this. “I have arranged a trial in the court, there will be no fight. This will be a very private trial, not public knowledge. Tony will be our representative, he knows the way they think and he’s been preparing for this the last couple of months.”
They all nodded and after Steve disturbed them their files on their next mission, they left the Tower. Trial was today and Steve hoped they would get somewhere, only Tony could succeed it. Not that Steve really saw him this last three months; they just awkwardly walked past by each other when they encountered which was often since they lived in the same place. Steve started to sleep on the upper floor to avoid these awkward encounters. For all he knew, Tony was working day and night for this trial and he was getting somewhere. He’s been going to court for months and there was progress. He believed in him and their cause.
Steve still did not regret his confession, he was not angry at Tony. He never expected him to say that he loved Steve or anything. Maybe he hoped but he always knew this would never happen. At least, Tony knew the truth now. Steve wanted to talk to him again but it seemed impossible because Tony was so busy and it would do no good to talk to him. Steve knew that they could never really be like they used to and he could not say that it did not bother him. He was kind of fed up with sneaking into Tony’s room while he was sleeping or studying to make sure he was okay. Of course he was okay.
Steve wore his suit. He was going to give a statement also. They have to go, now. He went to Tony’s room, realizing they will have to speak to each other now.
He opened the door to Tony’s room, seeing his naked back and immediately turning back. He coughed. “Uhm Tony. We have to get going.”
Tony did not seem to mind he saw him half-naked. Why would he? It’s not like he didn’t see him like this before but Steve kinda thought that it would make Tony feel uncomfortable after his confession. Well, apparently it wasn’t like that. Tony wore his suit and had trouble tying his tie.
“I save planets and I can’t even tie my tie.” He murmured. Steve chuckled at his struggle with his tie.
“Let me.” Steve said, fixing Tony’s tie. It was weird.
“Well, this is weird.” Tony said after a few seconds.
“Thanks for pointing that out.” Steve rolled his eyes. He recognized how Tony acted as if nothing happened and how he seemed to be okay with it. Steve found that some kind of disturbing. He expected some kind of reaction but there seem to be none. Maybe it was the heavy responsibility he had for months. Maybe when this was all over, he would react. Steve didn’t care how he reacted; he just wanted him to show an emotion. Anger, hate, something…Any of them would have done it.
“Let’s go.” Tony shrugged. Steve nodded and they left for the court.
***
“What happened?! How did it go? What’s the result?!” Peter rushed to Tony as he came out of the court. Steve and he were waiting outside, all dressed in suits for their statements which they gave earlier.
“Calm down, Peter. Let him breath.” Steve said but he looked just as excited as Peter.
“Superhuman Registration Act is repealed.” Tony said, grinning.
“What? Are you serious? Please don’t be joking. Please.” Peter looked like he was about to faint. Tony enjoyed their nervous state.
“It is over guys, superheroes can now return to their prior activities.” Peter jumped on Tony with this, hugging the shit out of him.
“Yes!” Steve shouted, almost tearing up from the happiness he was feeling. Tony laughed.
“No more deaths. It is all over.” Tony repeated like he still could not believe what he had accomplished. He threatened them a little and left them no other choice. Sure, there would be other problems in the future and other acts but Civil War was over now.
“Does that mean we can move back to the Avengers Mansion now?” Peter asked, his eyes wide with hope.
“I think it does.” Steve said, looking at Tony.
Tony nodded. “Yes, yes. We should inform the other Avengers.”
With that, they jumped on Tony’s car and headed for the Mansion. Tony was driving and Steve sat on the passenger seat. Peter was on the back, constantly muttering things about ‘freedom’ and how he was happy and how Aunt May would be happy when he told her. Tony was occasionally throwing glances at Steve and he would catch him smile at nothing from time to time. He guessed it was the pride of victory, at least one of them was happy. Tony was of course glad they got through this but he could never forgive himself for the things he has done before he joined the anti-registration. Deaths. Tortures. He didn’t even want to think about them. But at least it was all over.
Then again, there was Steve. He had no idea how to act around him so he just decided to look like he didn’t care. He knew Steve would just let go of him after a couple of months. Every person in his life did. Not that he didn’t trust Steve, he trusted him with his life. It was just that he seemed to destroy everything he ever loved. And he really, really didn’t want to ruin Steve. He loved him too much to do that. So he just stayed away from him, distracted himself with work and alcohol.
He knew it was probably not to best way to get Steve to hate himself when he got drunk and partied all the time but it was probably the easiest. Steve always disliked Tony’s these habits and if Tony could just show him that he was an arrogant, careless prick; Steve would understand he was wrong about his love for Tony. Tony didn’t even believe Steve really loved him, he was probably confused or something. Even his own parents didn’t love Tony. Pepper didn’t love him, she married Happy. Nobody ever really loved him. And Tony was okay with it, really. It was just that when Steve told Tony he was in love with him, he knew he couldn’t say the words back even if they were true. Steve would come to his senses once he realized Tony did not worth loving.
“Tony? What’s wrong?” Steve asked as Tony drifted away from his thoughts.
“Oh, nothing.” He shrugged. “Just thinking about the party I’m gonna throw today.” He smirked. Tony did one thing well, and that was to convince people that he was actually an emotionless bastard.
“This is the first day the Civil War ended and you are going to throw a party?” Steve asked as he frowned.
“A billionaire should spend the money he earns on useful things, don’t you think?” Tony said and wore his sunglasses, turning up the radio and to full volume. He was being a dick. Good.
Steve stayed silent.
***
Steve watched Tony as he popped up a champagne bottle. Tony was acting so not himself. Or so himself. Steve couldn’t decide. If it was some kind of attempt to make Steve not love Tony or something, it was not going to work. He didn’t think Tony would go that far as to make Steve fall out of love with him. But again, it was Tony. But why would he try that? Unless it bothered him.
He was really happy and proud that they won the Civil War, if you call that a win, of course. He looked at his friends and felt really good about that. All Avengers, under one roof. Their good old Avengers Mansion. They could now freely continue their lives in their home and save the day like they used to. He just wished Tony would be happy too, it was obvious that he was trying to hide something. Steve just didn’t know what.
“So what’s the next mission, Cap?” Hawkeye asked. He looked like he had enough of Wade’s jokes and Peter’s cracking ups. Steve actually had no idea why Deadpool was here. Whatever.
“Come on, Katniss. Take a break! I’m throwing a party tonight at the party! And no, Logan, there will be no security pass so you don’t have to worry about the adamantium.” Tony said, everybody laughing at his comment.
“In the Tower?” Natasha asked.
“Yes and dress nice. Or come naked. I don’t want you wandering around my party with your weird costumes.”
“You’re one to talk Iron Man; I don’t think nobody here loves their costume as much as you do.” Wanda said.
“Yeah, whatever.” They laughed it off and everybody continued chatting and drinking. It was a happy moment.
After an hour with the Avengers, Steve went to his room. Jarvis arranged all Avengers’ stuff to be brought back to the Mansion so they didn’t have to do that which was really great since he was really tired. Tony’s room was the next door, so he heard him also going into his room. He really didn’t want to go to this party but he had to make sure Tony didn’t drink too much. Because he would.
After one hour of sleep, he started dress up. He wasn’t exactly sure what to wear so he just wore the suit he wore earlier. He went to look for Tony but he was out. Of course, it was his party, he was probably making arrangements. Steve didn’t really want to leave him alone so he decided to go to the Tower and offer his help.
When he arrived, Jarvis said that Tony was in his lab. He went to the lab and saw Tony working on a new prototype.
“It’s your party night.” Steve stated, not really directing a question.
“Well, a billionaire should-”
“You said this before.” Steve said.
“What?”
“You used this excuse before with the same words. I quote ‘A billionaire should spend the money he earns on useful things’.” Steve didn’t mean to sound harsh but it just came out like that.
“Yeah, whatever. Everything is ready, so I decided I could work.” Tony said, yawning. There was something really off with him, Steve could tell.
“Tony-what is wrong?” Steve asked.
“Come on, Cap. What is wrong with you? I am fine.” Tony said but did not look Steve in the eye.
Steve went near him and sat on the chair in front him.
“Look, I don’t need some kind of a pitying attempt for you to make me feel good. I am fine. I was always like this. Nothing changed.” Tony said, still not making eye contact.
“No. I do not believe that. And how can you say that it is a pitying attempt? You seem to forget what I told you earlier.” Steve was surprised how he was being this honest.
Tony stayed silent for a minute before saying, “Yeah, it is just my charm you know. I’m sure it will pass. Nothing unusual.” Steve just stared at him blankly. Before he could say something, Tony got up and left with his prototype. Steve stayed there for a few minutes to process what Tony had said. He did not believe him or he pretended like he didn’t. How could he not? He thought he made it obviously clear. He was really furious that Tony did not take his feelings seriously. And Steve was rarely furious.
When the time came for the party, he headed for the special room Tony got made for his parties. There were already dozens of people, all dressed in expensive suits and praising Tony for giving this wonderful party. Ugh. Tony looked as usual, blank eyes, but laughing and joking around and of course, drinking. He got back to his drinking habit and this really bothered Steve.
He decided to just leave Tony alone because Steve was angry. He was.
“Hey, Steve.”
“Bruce. How are you?” He said as he saw Bruce Banner approaching.
“I am fine but you look down.” He said, raising an eyebrow.
“It’s Tony. He is drinking again.”
“Something is troubling him.” Bruce said, he looked at Steve as to imply something. Steve ignored it.
“Do you want a drink? I’m going to get one.”
“No, thanks.” Steve said, Bruce left.
Steve was asked by Luke, Peter and Wade to go dance with them but he refused. He was not in the mood. He just stood there and watched Tony flirting with everyone. It pissed the hell out of him. He really didn’t want to get out of control but Tony was pushing him. First he said it was not an ‘unusual’ think for Steve to feel attraction towards him and it will pass; now he was flirting with literally everyone. And it was Tony, so everybody was flirting back.
Steve started walking fast towards Tony and some guy who was holding Tony by the shoulders and whispering something, standing very close to him.
“Oh, you are absolutely right, Carl, I-”
“Can we talk?” Steve asked harshly.
“Oh, hi, Cap, I was just telling Carl about the-” Steve took the man’s hand and made him stop touching Tony like that. Tony watched him, confused. He was obviously drunk.
“We need to talk.” Steve started walking towards the exit.
“Okay…” Tony said, following Steve.
Steve went into the other room in the floor which was usually used as a pantry.
“So…are we gonna kiss or what?” Tony joked.
“Not funny. What the hell are you doing, Tony?”
“Partying, what else? And right now, I am being held captive by an extremely boring old man.” He said, laughing. He couldn’t even stand straight.
“Just tell me. You are off, I know it. Maybe I can help.”
“Help? Please. I don’t need help. I am Tony fucking Stark. Even if I did, why would you help me? I mean, why would anyone help me? I am no good to anyone. I don’t care about my friends. I don’t care about anything.” Tony was just bubbling now, he was really drunk.
“What about me?” Steve asked. Tony opened his mouth for a couple of times to say something but he didn’t. “No.” he said eventually.
“I don’t believe that. You can’t deceive me. I know you too well.”
“You don’t. You don’t know what a mess I am. You don’t understand. And you just- you just-”
“I just what?”
“You just come with all your pride and tell me that you like me.” Tony looked down.
“Love you.” Steve corrected. “I said I loved you.”
“Yeah, whatever, you said you…yeah you did say that.” Tony mumbled, more to himself than Steve.
“I don’t want you hurting yourself like this. You can cast me out, but don’t do it to yourself.” Steve said.
“It is not easy for me. Steve, you don’ love me. You don’t. Even my parents didn’t love me enough. I don’t deserve your love.” Tony confessed. Steve was not sure if he would remember these things once he was sober but he was sure that Tony meant those things.
“How can you say that? I’m not some 16 year old boy, Tony. I know what I feel or want.”
“And what do you want? Be with a fucked up like me? I don’t think anyone would want that. Even I don’t.”
“It’s not your fault that you parents were shit, Tony. Stop thinking that they left because something was wrong with you.” Tony was shocked because Steve didn’t usually talk about Howard like that; they were friends in the past. “Don’t look at me like that. I knew Howard; he was a great scientist and a friend. But he was not a great father. It is not your fault.”
“I think we should go back to the party.” Tony said uncomfortably. Steve knew he didn’t like to talk about his father.
Steve sighed.
“Okay.”
So they went in, Tony continued his flirting and Steve kept fighting himself whether or not he should kill Carl.