Six Against One Is Hardly a Fair Fight, But Then Again, What Did You Expect?
“Bruh.” You groaned, squirming under the weight of the person on top of you, “Personal space.”
You brought your knee up, driving it sharply into your attacker’s rib cage, which succeeded in distracting him long enough for you to push him over and roll on top of him, reversing your positions. You ground one knee into his solar plexus like you had with your sparring partner earlier, not hard enough to kill him, but definitely hard enough to hurt. You stared down at his face which, like his shield, you recognized from pictures in history books.
“Nice to meet you, Captain. I’m a big fan.” You whipped out one of your guns and pressed it against his chest. “But I’ve got orders.”
Your finger twitched on the trigger, but before you could take the shot you were slightly distracted by the sensation of someone’s foot connecting with the side your head, knocking you off of the disgruntled supersoldier and onto the floor. Your brain throbbed against your skull in an instant migraine, eliciting a pained groan from you. You rolled over onto your back to study your new attacker. Although it took longer than you would have liked since you had to wait a couple of seconds for your vision to stop being blurry.
She towered over you, knees bent in a defensive stance, green eyes scanning you for any sign of retaliation. She wore a skintight suit much like your own, but with even more pockets and holsters for weapons and ammo. One of her heavy black boots was planted about six inches from your face and, more importantly, she had a gun pointed directly between your eyes. Like her teammate, you were quickly able to recognize her.
“I know you.” You launched yourself into the air, managing to knock the loaded gun out of her hand and land back on your feet. “The Black Widow. My handlers have a deep admiration for your work. I think they’re disappointed that I didn’t turn out more like you, to be honest. They’re always comparing my record with yours. It’s kind of annoying, actually.” You frowned, aiming a punch at her nose. “Like you’re my overachieving older sister or something.”
She blocked your punch effortlessly, launching one of her own. “Do I know you?”
You ducked her blow. “Probably not, since I’m considerably better than you lot at not getting my secret identity leaked to the public.”
Before she could reply, you managed to land a kick in the center of her chest, sending her flying back. Of course, being the Black Widow, it took her approximately half a second to recover and even less to decide that it was time to shut you up. She flew towards you with a series of short-but-brutal attacks, managing to get in several hits and almost knocking you off your feet again. Almost.
This was getting old. You were here to do a job. You drew your other gun, pointing it at the redhead’s face.
Apparently, she had the same idea at about the same time you did, because you found yourself staring down the barrel of yet another gun. The two of you stared each other down, each with a finger tight on the trigger.
Your staredown was rudely interrupted by an arrow, which zoomed over your attacker’s head and latched onto your chest. Fortunately, the arrow had a flat, non-lethal tip, which didn’t pierce your skin or injure you in any way. Unfortunately, about two seconds after it hit you, the arrow released an electric shock, effectively distracting and hurting you as well as taking out your communicators. Brilliant.
As you fired off a round of bullets in the direction the arrow had come from, you contemplated just how very screwed you were. You were trapped inside a fallen Hydra base crawling with S.H.I.E.L.D. operatives, facing off against at least three of the Avengers, you’d lost one of your favorite guns, and now you had no way of calling for backup.
You didn’t get payed enough for this. Well, technically you didn’t get payed at all, but that was besides the point. ‘Get beaten up by a bunch of superhumans’ was so not on your to-do list for today.
Time to stop playing around. You grabbed Romanov by the collar, pulling her towards you until your faces were only a few inches apart. You smiled sweetly. “Goodnight.”
You fired a dart from your wrist canon directly into her neck, pushing her away from you as you did so. You shot another dart at her, just for good measure, and watched as she slumped to the floor with an angry and slightly confused expression on her face. This seemed to bother Hawkeye, if the flurry of arrows that hit the wall behind you, barely giving you time to drop to the ground and roll out of the way, was any indication.
You leaped back to your feet, rolling your shoulders and taking a series of deep breaths. One down, two to go. Assuming that they were the only three here. Which seemed doubtful, now that you thought about it.
Sure enough, as if your thoughts had summoned him, the Hulk chose that precise moment to crash through the ceiling not even thirty feet from where you stood, followed closely by Iron Man and Thor. Because apparently the universe hated you and didn’t think that one you versus two Avengers were bad enough odds. Why not throw in the other three? Thanks, universe.
You groaned. When you said you wanted a bit of a challenge, this was not what you meant. But you were determined not to go down without a fight.
You went in firing darts and bullets (which you quickly realized didn’t work on the Hulk or Iron Man, of course) and swinging punches and kicks at everything within an arm’s reach. You thought you might have managed to hit Thor with a couple of your darts, but it was hard to tell since Captain America seemed determined to use his shield to bash your head in.
You tried to fire off another round of bullets, but the gun just made an empty clicking noise in your hand. You cursed yourself for not bringing more ammo but, to be fair, you hadn’t expected this kind of a fight. Which, in hindsight, was probably dumb.
Realizing that fighting back was becoming increasingly pointless by the second, you switched your focus to escape. After employing some of your impressive gymnastic skills to dodge around several Avengers, you flipped across the room, dropped down to avoid an onslaught of arrows, and dove headfirst out the nearest window, thanking your lucky stars that you’d run into the Avengers on the first floor.
You sprinted across the fields surrounding the base like the devil himself was right behind you. As you ran, you cupped your hands around your mouth, preparing to scream for help.
And that was when the flying hammer hit you in the head.