comfortably alone

 winter carried ellie's plate over to where ellie sat. she helped ellie move herself and her backpack over in front of the reclining chair, leaning her back slightly. she didn't want ellie to sit straight up for long, worrying that her wound would open back up. winter holds the plate out to ellie who smiles at her, taking it carefully from the other. winter sits on the ground a few feet from ellie's side.

"you aren't eating?" ellie asks, confused, then setting the plate to the side.

"it's like twelve thirty in the morning. i've already ate.. but, uh.." winter shoves her hand in her sweatpants pocket, pulling out an ointment tube. she holds it up and passes it to ellie. "it's super old but it's all i have to prevent an infection. shake the tube before using it. it should also help scarring if you're worried about that." winter says. ellie nods her head and purses her lips, trying to read the worn off words on the labels.

"thank you.." winter sees ellie put it in her bag, turning to the other and a smirk takes over her face. winter could feel her eyes getting ready to roll, she could already tell ellie was getting ready to say something to annoy her. ellie quirks an eyebrow up. "i knew you cared about me." she snickers when she hears winter sigh loudly.

winter nods her head, standing up and looking down to ellie. she could feel her cheeks start heat up when their meet, not liking how her body keeps reacting to ellie's comments.

"right. goodnight."

"i knew you fucking cared! look your blushing already!" ellie laughs. winter scoffs, not arguing because she's very obviously blushing. she's not sure the blushing is from her caring as much as it's from being in front of another person who still doesn't have a shirt on. winter huffs, waving ellie off and starting to walk to her room. "oh come on, winter. some shitty pity laughter wouldn't hurt you."

winter spins to face ellie, eyebrows pinched together. she crosses her arms, staring back at ellie. ellie had a small smile, waiting for winter to respond. 

"ha ha." winter says blandly. ellie slowly closes her eyes, leaning her head back dramatically with a groan.

"you could at least try to make it seem real." ellie rolls her eyes. "you're allowed to have fun, you know?" sarcasm dripping in her voice. 

"i'm.. tired." winter pauses, "eat and rest." she wasn't actually tired, she was confused about all the feelings she was feeling at once. she was unsure what feelings meant what as she's never had to confront or think about what these feelings are. she just wanted to lay down and push all of it back of her brain. she's also still worried about ellie's pain. feeling all of these emotions at once made her emotionally drained already. ellie hums.

"but then who would eat this bread with me?" ellie pulls her jacket off the bowl in her lap, a faked shocked expression as if she didn't know bread was underneath. winter would be lying if she didn't perk up at the sight, she unfolded her arms and curiously stepped closer to look into the bowl. "so crazy how that just appeared. hm.. seems to be a gift for you." ellie mumbles, examining the bread too. "oh look!" ellie exclaims.

"your gift also comes with some bomb ass strawberry jam! you must have a pretty cool friend if they stole a whole fucking jar of jam for you. you're so thankful, right?" she lets her small smirk show for a moment, knowing she has winter's attention. ellie's now holding a red filled jar up with one hand and the bowl in the other. she acts as if she's never seen them before, starting to shift her gaze down from winter onto the objects in front of her, feigning more curiosity and tilting her head at winter. 

winter bites her lip while thinking of the offer, shifting her weight onto her right leg. she looks from the objects to ellie's smiling face, seeing the other wiggle her eyebrows. she'd be lying if she wasn't a little excited to have more bread. winter nods, slowly sitting back down on the floor adjacent to ellie.

"sweet." ellie mumbles with a grin. she then picks up a slice of bread and the small spreading knife sitting inside of the bowl. she unscrews the lid of the jar, scooping some jelly out and onto the bread. winter tries to subtly take in the sweet smell of the jam, she's never smelt that before. she watches ellie make the jam as even as possible, not putting a too much on the bread in case winter ends up not liking it.

"usually people put the bread in a toaster, then they put the jam on. but i don't remember seeing one in your kitchen and i don't want to go look, so we're just going to eat it untoasted." ellie gives the slice to winter, watching her inspect the jam on top. 

"i know what a toaster is, my dad has told me about it, but uh.. what is jam exactly?" winter asks, looking over to ellie. ellie swallows the carrots she shoveled into her mouth, coughing a little before answering.

"it's basically crushed strawberries, sugar, and lemon juice." ellie nods, waiting for winter to eat it. winter just nods, looking back down to the bread in her hands.

"right.. so.. what are strawberries? i remember that word, just not what it looks like." winter asks before taking a bite, she softly smiles at the taste. she can't explain the giddy feeling she gets when she tries the food ellie brings. the sweet flavor started to make her mouth water. it was more sticky than winter had anticipated though. she looks over to the other seeing ellie hold up a finger and reach into her bag. ellie grunts as she leans over more.

ellie pulls out a magazine that had plenty of pages already ripped out or torn, and a pencil. winter eats the bread while watching ellie scribble on the paper, dusting the crumbs off her hands after finishing it. ellie then motions for winter to scoot closer, but all winter did was stare back at her. ellie just sighs and sticks her hand out. the other was confused why, but still hesitantly reached for the others hand. winter let out an 'oof' as she got pulled toward ellie, but not fighting her grip much. she follows the direction ellie pulls, now scooting closer to the other to see better.

ellie leans the magazine toward winter, pointing to the poorly drawn strawberry with the eraser on the pencil.

"see this? it's small leaves that are on top. and this?" each time she points she glances at winter to see her nod back. "those specks are tiny yellow seeds, there's way more than what i drew, hundreds of them. the strawberry itself is red though, and it tastes either sweet or a bit sour depending on each strawberry." winter hums, starting to lean her head forward to look in the jar again. ellie picks it up, holding it out to the other. 

winter eyes the jar, wanting to smell it more than look at it. ellie then reaches and grabs the others right hand that was resting on winter's knee, pulling it towards her gently and putting the jar in her hand. winter tried to ignore the burning feeling in her hands from ellie's hands touching her mixing with the coldness of the glass. she trained her eyes on the jam, tilting the jar and looking down into it to see better. the sweet smell is more intense than it was before, wafting the scent into winter's face which makes her smile again.

"the yellow is seeds?" she glances to ellie. winter lifts the jar up closer to her face.

"mhm." ellie hums back, a slight nod. she watches winter sniff the jar, chuckling at her. "smells good?" ellie giggles. winter shoots her gaze to ellie when she hears her laughing, feeling herself definitely blush from embarrassment. she shyly nods with careful eyes, looking back into the jar.

"so i can grow them from these seeds?" winter asks, not looking up, studying the jar basically. she tilts the jar taking note of how thick the jam is.

"ehh, no. for one, those are too mashed and covered in other things in the jam. and second, the seeds would have to come from a mushy strawberry." ellie informs. winter slumps her shoulders a bit, she wanted to just grow her own and have the scent linger everywhere she could get it to. she quietly huffs, but is still thankful to have been able to try the sweetness of it.

"i see.. how big are they?" she asks and looks over to ellie, not expecting another piece of bread to be handed to her. she puts the jar down, grabbing the bread from ellie.

"uh, like, about this size?" she makes it sound like a question and goes to make a circle with her fingers, then holding her hand up to show winter. "i've seen a few a little bigger though, also a few smaller than that." ellie nods to winter, dropping her hand. winter nods back.

"you can spread the jam on yours if you want, i don't want to force you to just eat jam and bread." ellie chuckles, reaching in between them to push the jar a tiny bit to winter.

winter spread the jam on, waiting for both of them to finish eating before she talks again.

"why do you use angry words when you don't seem angry?" she has furrowed brows and fiddles with her thumbs, refusing to look at ellie right now. it's a genuine question to winter, but she could hear amusement  in ellie's voice as she responds.

"when did i? i've only been teasing you, not angry." ellie says back with a slight chuckle, bending her head down and tilting it to see winter's face better. "have i bothered you?" she follows up. she scans winter's features trying to see if winter was serious.

"just.. like when you say.. 'fucking', and other words too." winter mumbles, feeling awkward repeating those words. she hears ellie stifle a laugh at the realization, making her feel ridiculous for asking.

"those words.. how do i put this. a lot of people use those types of words for exaggeration or emphasis on a word to make a stronger point. a lot of people also just use them as normal words, i.e. me. they aren't just angry words." winter hums, not completely understanding why anyone would use them in a non-angry setting. "you know i wasn't mad right?" ellie asks quietly. winter glances at her, but quickly looks away. "you don't make me upset."

"mhm." she didn't mean for it to sound as unconvincing as it did, she's just still processing the information. she nods to make up for her tone. ellie sighs.

"look at me, winter." when their eyes met ellie shook her head a few times. "i'm serious. i have fun annoying you, sure, but i'm not mad." ellie has a straight face now, obviously trying to make her words stick to winter's brain.

"just promise to tell me if you're mad. i won't overthink if you promise." she felt uncomfortable seeing ellie's serious expression, it was a different vibe from the other times ellie had been serious. 

"as in i'll see you again?" ellie's serious face turns into her trademark smirk. winter pushes her shoulder, mumbling a small 'sorry' when she sees ellie wince but laugh at the push.

"not if you don't stop bringing up seeing me again. you're stupid." winter scoffs and rolls her eyes, and ellie giggles. after a moment ellie clears her throat, picking up the jar that sits between them still.

"i promise." she chirps, screwing the lid back on the jar. she doesn't look at winter after saying it, instead she's bringing a pamphlet out of her bag.

"what's that?" winter asks, shifting over to try and see what the others doing. she watches ellie unfold it then fold a few pieces of the edges back.

"it's a map, do you know how to read one?" ellie lifts an eyebrow. 

"i'm not sure. what's it a map of? i've never seen one like that." winter's confused glance over to ellie makes the other smile fondly. 

"uh, well. see this?" ellie circles her a finger around an area with the small words 'jackson' in it. it had a small house drawn on top of the word. winter hums. "this is where i live. it's where i go when i leave here. you can't read a local map?" ellie asks. winter shakes her head, leaning back to look at ellie more.

"i mean, i get the concept i guess. i haven't left these woods though, ellie. where are we?" her eye dart in between ellie's with a confused expression. ellie sighs.

"right, ok. fuck.. well.. the last few times i've left i've kinda just walked in a direction until i find a road. usually i get like five miles set back from doing that. i'm supposed to be home early tomorrow, i have to go back soon. with my side i can't go out of my way too much. literally sitting hurts, i can't imagine hours of walking would feel nice." ellie puts her hair thats fallen out of her ponytail behind her ear, glancing at winter. 

winter tried to not seem as disappointed about her leaving, but felt herself sink back, nodding once. her lips were pulled together tightly. ellie looks at her expectantly, she then leans on the chair behind her more with a pained grimace.

"could you please sit closer so i don't have to lean?" ellie closes her eyes, maybe trying to not focus on her pain but winter felt her shut eyes meant she was getting frustrated. winter moved to sit crisscrossed, subtly closing her body off from ellie. 

winter, herself, didn't even understand why she was acting distantly again. she didn't want to feel jealous, but the realization that ellie had so many other people who cared for her and had waiting for her return made winter's mouth go dry. she wonders how it'd feel to remember multiple faces and names, she imagined it'd be hard for her to remember just where things were in ellie's town by how big it looked. she wanted to help ellie, she just felt as though everything ellie needed she'd be useless at. she can't even go through with hurting a living person, which is what's gotten her into this situation.

"i'm not sure what you want me to do. i don't know what roads are what. i'm not much help with this." winter looks to the side, no longer wanting to look at the map or ellie. she trained her eyes on the front door. it's not like she wanted ellie to stay, but she definitely didn't want to be as isolated as she had been making herself. it'd be selfish to ask ellie to stay longer, but she did have a passing, short lived, thought of convincing ellie she shouldn't leave while hurt.

"how about any of these landmarks? do any look familiar?" ellie tilts the map to winter, but she just squints at the map, shaking her head without looking hard. "winter, come closer." ellie huffs, catching winter's attention. they share a silent moment while staring at each other.

"if there's a body of water somewhere, maybe." she hears ellie grunt before she feels ellie hook a hand on and under winter's thigh, she flinches and tenses her legs at the feeling, not expecting anything like that. she gasps as ellie groans out, pulling winter's thigh until they were sitting thigh to thigh. she slowly takes her hand away, looking into winter's eyes.

"then actually look at the damn map." ellie hisses in pain as she leans back onto the chair, taking weight off of her wound. winter just stared back at her with wide eyes and her mouth slightly open. something in ellie's stare made her listen, leisurely moving her head down to the map, her eyes leaving ellie last. she scans the map areas, not exactly sure where to look. ellie points in a solid green area.

"this is the forest we're in, i'm just not exactly sure where." ellie points to a few places around the edge of the green. "these are places i've popped out of while leaving, but i don't remember which direction i went those times." she then trails her finger along the paper to a highlighted road. "ideally i need to be on this road, it's the quickest way." winter hums back. she moves her hand up to touch the map. the paper makes a soft sound under her finger.

"this looks like the lake that's like a mile and a half away. my dad used to fish there, so.." she tries to trace where they'd be. "ellie i really don't know what distance is what on this map. maybe.." she leans more close to ellie, trying to see the other side of the green area better. 

"i mean i remember my dad telling me that the path out front led to a backroad.. but he covered that path almost fifteen years ago." ellie brings a hand up to pinch her nose bridge. 

"ok.. ok.. so, i assume the path could've been their driveway before everything, so it'd probably be mostly a straight shot out, right? is the path to the lake curved?" ellie asks, a hopeful look in her eyes. winter nods, which makes ellie nod. "well, here is, uh.. this is about two miles from the lake, think you can draw a shitty path replica to about the area of this cabin?" 

"um.." before winter could finish her thought ellie shoves a pencil in her hand, keeping her finger on the map for a general marker of distance.  "maybe.. like this?" winter mumbles as she draws the rough direction of where the path goes, stopping a little before and slightly offset of ellie's finger.

"the front of cabin would face this way then?" ellie runs her finger back and forth in a somewhat northeast on the map in the green. winter nods wen ellie looks over to her.

"ok and that lines up straight to this road.." ellie plucks the pencil from winter's hand, making a small circle where the cabin would be. she then marks where the front path would lead if it was straight. it was a road a little bit away from the road ellie needs to take. she marks a line off from the path straight to the road she needs to travel. "that saves like almost two hours, sweet." she grins as winter gives a small smile in return. 

winter feels a tiny bit let down, but not wanting to think about how she won't see the other for a while. possibly longer than last time since she's hurt. she reaches up tp scratch the side of her neck, looking away from ellie and instead focusing on rolling the fabric of her shirt in between her fingers.

winter then thinks of what ellie mentioned when she showed up earlier. nerves bundle up in her stomach, her hands starting to shake from the feeling. she then shifts to face ellie more. she didn't mean to look at ellie for as long as she did, but the words wouldn't come out. ellie raises her eyebrows, waiting for winter to say something. ellie nervously chuckled at the staring mumbling a 'what?'

"sorry, just.. what happened earlier? i'm getting nervous remembering you saying they were watching me. i don't know what i should be doing right now.. or how to avoid it." winter almost whispers. ellie could see the hints of fear on the others face and she wishes she could say something to make her not worry, but truthfully ellie knows worrying is what keeps people alive now. ellie barely shakes her head, blinking at winter for a few seconds.

"i was coming here, but i only remembered the general direction. i tried to find the cabin a few different times. i just couldn't remember what part of the forest it was close to, so i guess i kept missing this place somehow, but!" ellie holds the map up with a smile. "now i have directions and i can bother you more." ellie earns a half chuckle back, winter's face still displaying discomfort.

"mm.. ok, i'll tell you but i don't think it's best to describe what they planned to do to you.." winter furrows her brows, understanding the vague point ellie was referring to. ellie sighs, leaning forward to also turn a bit toward winter, their thighs still touching. "they didn't know i was there. i was just going to let them go, find a way around them, but then they mentioned seeing a girl in a fenced field cleaning a chicken coop. from what i heard it's been a few days of them camping and trying to see if you're alone.. they made some pretty fucking gross comments, so i took care of it." winter pulls her head back a small bit, half hoping ellie was kidding. her chest rises and falls roughly a few times. she pulls her eyebrows together, staring deep into ellie's eyes after hearing her.

"you hurt them?." winter trails off. it's not that she felt unsafe with ellie, she knows the other was looking out for her but it was still shocking and scary to hear what ellie could actually do. she shifted uncomfortably under ellie's stare, feeling her nerves grow. even though she had been scared of ellie at first, she started to realize just how dangerous her first encounter with her could've been.

"would you have wanted me to?" ellie says lowly. winter's eyes adverted away from ellie's face. she wasn't sure, she didn't know how she was supposed to feel. it was nice knowing ellie would protect her, she's just not sure she loves the idea of how violent ellie could get. "do you want the whole truth?" ellie asks after letting winter think for a moment. winter looked back at ellie, taking in to account ellie's concerned eyes. she nodded, not trusting herself to speak properly right now as she already felt a lump in her throat.

"i waited until one went to use the bathroom then i stabbed the other in the neck and let him bleed on the ground. the other heard and attacked me from behind. he missed actually stabbing me, just cutting my side. we fought and i slit his throat." ellie's voice quiet and her face deadpanned. she scanned winter's face, taking note of the poorly hidden terror. ellie's eyes softened at the sight. "winter, i've met those types of guys before. they aren't safe, they aren't trustworthy. i wasn't going to let them go. you shouldn't have to experience what they would've done." ellie looked sincere, genuinely worried about winter's feelings.

"i took care of it." she whispers, slightly moving her arm on her thigh and turning her hand to softly touch winter's forearm. she runs her fingers back and forth a few times over winter's warm skin.

winter let out a choppy sigh accompanied with flickering eyes. she then tightly closed her eyes, hanging her head while trying to keep her composure in front of ellie and not tear up. she felt so embarrassed and guilty for making ellie protect her. it's not like she asked, but she knows now that she's the indirect cause for ellie's injury. her shoulders start feeling heavy.

"do i scared you?" ellie whispers again. she wouldn't sugarcoat it for winter, but she wouldn't explain the worst details.

"a little.." winter whispers back, she attempted to make it not as pitiful as it sounded. ellie quickly took her hand away from winter at the confession. mentally in turmoil over trying to find a way to fix winter's views on her. "i just can't imagine you doing that." winter trails off. glancing at ellie's empty face. she envy's the ability ellie had for seeming indifferent.

ellie felt her heart constrict as she heard her words. she felt ashamed making winter scared, she couldn't just lie to her about who she is though.

"good. you shouldn't have to see that." ellie says matter-of-factly. they sit an awkward silence for a few minutes, winter looking at the floor. ellie spent that time trying to gauge what winter was feeling. really winter was just trying her best to mimic ellie's previous expression. she wanted to be as big of a person as ellie, but she just felt so powerless.

ellie decided to try and lighten the mood, starting to hate the silence she created. she nudges winter's knee with her own, the soft pressure making winter jolt and turn to her. 

"hm?" winter hums as she notices just how many freckles ellie has, not remembering them being as visible as they are now. she hadn't been looking this closely before, she didn't feel the need to memorize her face before either, but now winter suddenly feels like it was important to remember even the smallest details. perhaps it's because she didn't want to forget ellie, at all, but she chooses to not think too hard about it currently.   

"can you answer questions i have for you know?" ellie smiles and raises her eyebrows to seem inviting. winter gives a 'mhm' back. ellie had been curious about winter since the first night they met, she thinks back to when she gave winter her first apple and bread. she still gets giddy thinking about how winter's face lit up in unspoken gratitude and wonder.

"for basics how old are you? oh! and have you really never left? that's fucking crazy to me! i never listened as a teen." ellie looked like she could've kept going, but winter quickly puts her hand up waving harshly and shaking her head.

"no, no. it's not safe out there. i don't need to leave, i'm safer here." winter rushes out. "i guess except for those guys.." she again trails off, but then speaks again. "i turned eighteen a few weeks ago. how old are you?" she questions back.

"i see. i turned eighteen a month before i met you. do you like reading?" ellie tilts her head.

"i've read every book in this house at least five times." she giggles. her mom used to like romance novels quite a bit and her dad never got rid of them. when he'd catch winter reading them he'd mention how much she looks like her mom, having the same concentration face.

"i can bring you different ones next time! we have so many in jackson!" ellie widely smiles, and winter smiles too, just slightly. the thought intrigued her, she wonders what ellie would pick for her, if it'd be the genre of thriller, crime, romance, or suspense. she wonders what books ellie likes and if she'd read them with ellie.

"yeah, jackson.. have you always lived there?" winter starts to pick on the skin around her nails. she feels so selfish.

"oh no, i've been around the country. i only came up this way when i was fourteen because- uh, because i had family here." ellie cuts herself off in the middle of her own sentence, making winter wonder where it was going before changing her answer. winter just nods, not wanting to press too much when ellie obviously isn't ok with sharing it. "you know.. uh," ellie glances at winter before folding the map and putting it in her bag, "it's- it's safe in jackson. we have plenty of open houses there.." it was ellie's turn to trail off. she started to pinch the skin on her hand while biting the inside of her cheek, waiting for winter's response.

winter knew where this was going. she didn't hate the idea of being with ellie more, but she hated the idea of being so exposed to others. she can't even imagine the sensory overload she'd get within the first five minutes of being there. she feels bad shooting ellie down, but knows it's just not realistic for right now. maybe ever.

"i.. i can't. i have everything of mine here. i have memories here, and my animals. everything here is all i need, ellie." winter gives her a sorry look, but ellie just nods. winter could tell she was trying to brush off the rejection, she could see ellie's mind basically turning over for solutions.

"we could use a chicken farm at jackson, horses too. we already have horse stables and other horses, there's room." ellie tries to keep a neutral facial expression, only faltering into a small spurn frown when she sees winter shake her head.

"i can't just move everything in one trip, ellie. i don't want to leave anything." without missing a beat ellie whips her head up, locking eyes with winter, and talks before winter could continue her excuse.

"ok then i can make several trips, we can get everything." ellie's speaks fast with a hopeful look that doesn't convince winter. instead of telling ellie no again she changes the topic.

"so you said you came here for family, who did you come with? i doubt a fourteen year old could go across the country herself."

"you really just don't believe i'm that amazing huh?" ellie turn her frown into an exaggerated offended look.

"there's no way, ellie." winter giggles at ellie while shaking her head. her smile makes ellie instantly smile.

"yeah, there isn't. but how fucking cool would that be? a badass teen making it all the way here herself, i mean come on! i should just start telling people that." she chuckles. "my dad not dad dad-ish guy helped. but i totally saved his ass most of the time, you wouldn't believe how much he's gotten annoyed by simply being saved by me. i swear he just loves being mad sometimes." ellie says while smiling. winter feels selfish again for feeling jealousy. she was so jealous ellie still had that but she didn't. she's never felt so jealous of someone that wasn't a fictional person from a book. she watches ellie's smile drop after a second, ellie going to leaning back onto the chair again. "i guess he's just my not dad right now.." ellie mumbles, looking down at her hands in her lap.

"oh, i'm sorry.." winter instantly felt guilty for assuming ellie had a great connection with him. she still had the thought in the back of her head though.

"no, it's just. i spent so much fucking time hating him for something. something so stupid when zoomed out. it took so long for me to realize i was just being shitty to him because i felt useless. he just loved me that much, to do the stupid thing. he even stopped trying to fix it after a while, we didn't talk for about two years. i didn't want to honestly. i guess we're ok now though.. i don't know, it's just not the same and i'm worried it will never go back to normal." ellie glances over to the other, then at her lap, scratching her arm. winter just hummed, letting ellie take in her emotions.

"you know.. when my dad and i got into an argument one time, he didn't talk to me for almost a whole month. i'd cry to him, i'd basically beg him to look at me. after a while i just accepted that he had his own reasons for being upset, and although it'd didn't line up with my reasons at all, i did my best to understand that his emotions were bigger than mine for a reason. i used to literally dream about our relationship going back to normal night after night. i didn't want to lose him because of something stupid i did, so i gave him space and waited for him to be ready. i'm sure your dad not dad ended up realizing that. the best thing you can do now is cherish him. they're only alive for so long, you can't let your anger out live him." winter didn't let the lump in her throat pop, swallowing repeatedly so she wouldn't cry. "i had to realize, in my case, that he was only so angry because he didn't want me hurt. accepting is harder than the forgiving mushy talk." winter half smiles over to ellie. just then ellie pushes a short laugh and wipes the few tears pooling in her eyes. she smiles jokingly at winter.

"i bet you tried to leave." she smiled wider at winter's groan. winter leans back, putting one hand up to rub her eye. "i knew you were fucking lying dude!" ellie lets out a triumphant laugh.

"i barely did! i regretted it. greatly. i just wanted to pick him a flower on the other side of the fence, but he came out as i was jumping over." ellie laughs. winter softly smiles to herself, imagining his comforting smile he'd give when she gave him flowers every spring. winter chuckled as she continued. "that was our argument i was talking about. i think that was probably our only actual fight." 

"don't worry, i'll pick them for you next time." ellie leans her should just slightly into winter's with a confident smile. winter feels warm suffocate her cheeks as she scoffs. "there's pretty ones in jackson." ellie's voice picks up at the end and she raises her eyebrows, inviting winter another time.

"there probably is. maybe you should bring some back for me." 

"or you could come with me?" ellie proposes the idea again. 

"or not." winter widely smiles, teasing the other.

"fine. bread, flowers, books. what else should i bring for our next date?" ellie smirks. winter rolls her eyes, the red on her cheeks never fading. 

"you can't say that." she mumbles, looking away from ellie and towards the front door again. ellie mumbles a confident and annoying 'course i can' before giggling.

"oh my god, you're so blushing! i'm such a lady, bringing you food and flowers, you must feel so lucky." ellie smirks, laughing between words. she brings a hand up to her heart with a smitten look to winter. "i bet you like the cheesy romance things too!" winter doesn't understand how ellie could always be so proud of herself. despite winter's annoyance toward ellie, she was definitely blushing at ellie's phrasing.  

"relationships are cheesy in general, stupid." winter goes to scoot away after shooting an icy glare at ellie. she starts moving her right thigh that was touching ellie's away. ellie quickly let out a 'huh uh', pushing her thigh back on the floor. winter sighs, turning to ellie with a scowl. 

"do you not know how to keep your hands to yourself?" ellie laughs in winter's face, only making her more annoyed. truthfully winter wasn't fully hating the contact, but ellie didn't need to know that.

"what's wrong with wanting to be near you?" ellie quizzes back with a small smirk tugging on her lips. 

"nothing, morally, i guess." winter shrugs to seem indifferent, finally feeling that she's calmed her red cheeks. winter turns her head from ellie, this whole situation was embarrassing. "could you at least put a shirt on if you're going to be in my personal space?" she only feels ellie shift beside her, then shortly after hearing her backpack moving she feels ellie toss something her lap. winter looks down and sees a simple grey t-shirt crumpled in her lap. she looks over to ellie, a smirk practically swallowing ellie's face. winter gives a scrunched face back, glancing at the shirt then back up.

"yeah, cool shirt. i meant you putting on your body when i said 'could you put a shirt on'. usually people put a shirt on after." winter rolls her eyes, tossing it back to ellie. ellie then grabs her side, grunting loudly with a pained expression and squeezing her eyes shut quickly. her eyebrows were scrunched together and she throws her body back, leaning on the chair and squirming slightly. winter immediately moved to sit on her knees, facing ellie, with worried eyes and an open mouth. she went to put pressure on ellie's hand that was on the wound, assuming she was bleeding again by ellie's display.

"ellie?" winter's shaky voice whispered. just as she held ellie's hand down and looked up to ellie with wide eyes, ellie stopped moving and groaning. she peeks an eye open to see winter, a smile forcing it's way onto ellie's mouth. when winter catches on she gasps and pulls her hand back quickly. she crosses her arm, leaning back on her legs, and scowling angrily at ellie. "that's not funny, ellie. you scared me." ellie's smile only grew at those words.

"oh, but i'm so fucking hurt, winter. i can't possibly move my arms, are you really going to make a suffering person suffer more? i guess the only solution is you helping me. seeing as you care and are worried." ellie smiles smugly, throwing the shirt back at winter. winter huffs, staring at ellie's faux pained eyes. she rolls her eyes with a sigh and motions for ellie to put her arms up.

ellie had the same smile as she lifts her arms as much as she could, because she was still hurt. winter sees that she definitely could do it herself with her arm motion, so she lifts up to her knees and leans forward. she fumbles to fabric until she finds the arm holes and lines it up with ellie's raised hands. just as she slips it over her hands she pulls back, completely letting go of the shirt and letting it slip down ellie's arms.

"you can figure out the rest, i'm sure. i'll go get you some blankets for the night, it's late. what time are you leaving?" winter asks, rising to her feet. she brushes off her legs, looking down at ellie to see the other with an annoyed face, staring. ellie sighs, sitting up and popping her head through the big hole, pulling the cloth down to cover her torso. "oh, look how fast that was, almost as if you could've done it all by yourself." winter mumbles, picking up ellie's forgotten plate and walking to the kitchen.

"you're literally the least fun person i know." ellie grumbles, straightening the shirt on her. "i'm not sure, though. i need to be back by eight, and it takes like two to three hours to get back. probably longer with my side." ellie huffs at the thought. "so around.. mm, i don't know like four or five? it's.." ellie squints over to the clock sitting on a side table by the recliner. "it's almost two. i'll leave in like two-ish hours. i'll be quiet so i don't wake you, ok?" ellie looks to winter with a slight nod. winter bites back a frown that wants to appear, she'd be leaving so soon. winter slowly moves her stare from ellie to the floor in front of her while nodding back.

"yeah, ok.. just, uh.. yeah, just let me get you stuff to sleep with." winter glances quickly at ellie, the slightest hint of confusion on the others face. she takes a few deep breaths when she gets inside her room, shutting her eyes softly and trying to relax her thoughts. it was all jumbled, making her feel anxious after being alone for a second. some thoughts were selfish, jealous, concern, annoyance, and even some hopeful thoughts. but that's all they were. thoughts. she can wait to process those later, refusing to let her mind take over the time she has with ellie. 

winter hears a grunt and sliding noise from the living room, snapping out of her calming herself down. anxiety clung to her chest at the thought of ellie's pain worsening. she quickly grabs a pillow from her bed, going over to grab a few blankets from the rack in the living room. she stops midway, not seeing the two that were previously on there, tilting her head slightly. she then turns to where ellie was, now seeing ellie sitting in the recliner with the two blankets folded in her lap. 

"are you serious?" winter asks with annoyance while sighing. ellie just smiles back with a small wave. "do you just not know how to rest? i was going to help you up there." she shoots a glare towards ellie, walking over and holding to pillow out to her. ellie takes it, also putting it on her lap, still staring at winter.

"i thought you didn't care?" 

"i will literally throw boiling water on you while you sleep if you don't just shut up. here." winter holds out ellie's old bloody shirt that was left on the ground. ellie grabs it also. her hand then comes up to a zip motion on her lips, but she still had the same dumb smirk she always had. winter shakes her head, turning away from ellie and walks towards the lamp in the corner of the room. she looks back at ellie one more time, this time a fond and soft smile is on ellie's lips, making winter's lips slightly curve up despite her fighting it. she turns off the lamp, shuffling to her room and shutting her door. 

winter slowly climbs into bed, laying on her side, facing the door. she glances over to the side, to the piece of paper with a smiley face on it that was unfolded and leaned against the clock in her room. she really tried to sleep, but nothing worked. maybe it's her racing thoughts, maybe it's the fact that she starts genuinely thinking of leaving. both scare her, she's never had some many emotions at one time and she's never actually thought of what leaving the cabin would be like. now she wonders if she'd enjoy it more than her home. that just piles twenty more emotions onto her already overstimulated brain.