EIGHT! BRUCE
Captain Eight
Bruck’
“Well shit” says Brook. “They beat Nick FUrry.”
Tony was majestically brandishing his botle of Tequila like a babby brandishing its rattle. “It! Doesn’t! Matter! Stev’s! Wrong! I’m! Right!”
“Pkay, okay.” Brucy was placating. “I will be seeing about beeting them myself but you need to prepare for if I am not being strong enough.”
“Oh i’ll prepare alright” Tonu growled. “I’ll prepare.”
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“Wheeeee!1” Haqklwte sang as he twirlt and shot arrows around like showers of April. “Killong robots is soooooo much fun!”
“Geez Clunt” complains the Natasha. “Clam down!”
“I’m sorreeeeeee,” giggled Jawkeye.
“Steve did you give Clint sugar?” Accused Natasha.
“Only a smol sugar,” defended Streve.
Her boobos jiggle as Natasha shok her fist in anger. “Steeeeeeeeve!! Yu should know not to give sugar to Clint. He is full of excitement now.”
“Oh no” said Steve whil eClint skippe around giggling. “Clint these are theTon’ys labs. You might break A Thing.”
“Shouldn’t you be hapy about that?” Wondered Nat. “I mean are’nt you angry at Tong?”
“NOOOOOOO.” ballowed Steve. “I mean, YES, but NOOOOOOOO. I am a PARADIGM of MORAL VIRTUE. Even when I am CROSS with Tony I would NEVER want to destroy his parsonal property.”
“...But you’re fine with sendind assassins after him to kill him.”
“Yes.”
Natasha stared at Steve.
“What?” defensive was Steve. “Don’t complain!!!! You are being paid 4 this!!!”
“Actually” said Steve “I was wonderin. Why did you take this job?”
“For the monry of course. Duh.”
“But what for do you need the money for?”
Natasha wore a nervous face. “Well — Uh — You see —”
“Hello.”
“WHO THERE??” Steve demanded sternly.
“Tis I.” and who would be the one to step out of the shadows but Broose Baner.
“BRUUUUCE” Steve yelled.
“Yes.” He said calm. “Me.”
“YOU ARE MY NEXT TO FIGHT?????”
“No Steve. I am not her to fight you.”
“JUST FIGHT ME CODSARNIT.”
“Natasha” Bruce said softly.
Natasha folded her arms under her boob. “What???”
“I kow your secret.”
Natasha put her hand over her mouth and tears were in her eyes.
“Wait what” said Steve.
“Wait what” said Clont.
“Wait what” said Bucky.
“Where the dickens did this come from????” Steve said. “There was no fourshadowing or build=up for this at all!”
“Yeah Natasha I never knew you had a secret” Clint said vibratingwith sugar. “I thought you were just here to be the sexy voice of reason.”
“No no.” Said Brice all sinister. “There is more to a women than them having a vagoona and being progressive for having brans. You see Natasga here has a darrrrk secret.”
“Is that why they call her the Black Widew?” Clint asks.
“What” Bruce sayd.
“Because she has a dark secrest? Black widow?”
Bruce staired at Clint.
Steve was disgust. “That was just awlful. Get out forevre.”
“Aw.”
“Is the secret the wone from the new Age of Youtron move?” steve asked. “You know, that Nat ca’nt get preggers and shes’ a monstr? Because everone already saw that movie. Everyon already knows that plot twiste.”
“What? No. Not that one.” Bruce said. “No I am talking about Natash’as true secret. Her depest darkest one. The reason she agrede to go along with you. The greatest most tragic event in human history. The