Sharing The Secret
Under normal circumstances the inane giggling and chatter that filled the room would not bother Sif so much. But these were not normal circumstances.
She was surrounded by smiling maids, combing and pulling at her hair; twisting it, pinning it up only to release it and begin all over again. Her head ached from it.
An overly jovial dress maker was busily pulling at the swathes of pink satin cloth that she had been stuffed into. It had taken well over an hour to adjust the length and now the bodice was being laced up so tightly that Sif could barely draw breath.
Across the room, the blushing bride-to-be, or rather, gushing bride-to-be, stood twirling in front of a long mirror, excessively excitable whilst the servants and other dress maker beamed with delight, fawning over her and proclaimed how beautiful she looked.
Sif surveyed the petite woman scornfully. The soft pink material did not look out of place on her as it did on herself. The colour did not clash with her hair as it did with her own. The style also complimented Sigyn's small frame...this same style on Sif made her feel much too tall and wide.
The dress clung awkwardly to her curvaceous hips, and the square neckline cut into her ample bosom.
It had already been adjusted twice, previously it had squashed her chest flat but now her cleavage spilled out over the top, giving her the appearance of a common harlot.
At first Sif had reasoned with herself that she was a warrior, not a typical maiden who liked to be dressed up in elaborate gowns of silk and lace. And comparing herself to Sigyn as a woman would normally not cause her any resentment or jealousy. Normally she rejoiced in the fact that she had curves and long, athletic legs, whilst in comparison Sigyn was short and slight with narrow hips and a much flatter chest.
Yet now she found herself envying her.
Her thoughts were shattered by a sudden commotion in the room, a muffled voice rang out from the hallway, causing Sigyn to scurry out through a side door followed by a few maids, all giggling as they went.
Sif turned and was startled to see Loki striding purposefully through the main door, pursued by a protesting Frigga.
"You cannot enter here Loki, there are ladies who may be in a state of undress!"
She scolded.
Loki rolled his eyes at his mother,
"Which is precisely why I knocked and announced my intention to enter before I came in."
He strode across the room, eyes scanning it before they eventually rested on her. His deadpan expression gave nothing away as he studied the dress she was wearing closely, making Sif extremely uncomfortable.
"Loki, may I remind you that it is the accustomed practice for the bridal gown not to be seen by the intended husband until the union takes place!"
Frigga pointed out.
Loki indicated towards Sif, a look of distaste now present on his handsome features,
"Surely this is not the same gown that is to be worn by the bride?"
He said, aghast,
The dress maker hurried forward, bowing benevolently,
"Sire, the Lady Sigyn chose this style of gown...but I assure you it looks most becoming on her."
The implication of his well meant words, stung and Sif had to take a sharp intake of breath to quell her indignation.
It was made worse by Loki's intense gaze, she could feel his emerald eyes scrutinizing her.
Just then Thor appeared in the doorway, having followed Frigga along the hallway.
"Loki, what is the meaning of such an intrusion?"
He demanded.
Before Loki could respond, the side door opened and Sigyn came in now wearing a robe. If she was angry, she certainly did not show it. Her eyes practically lit-up when she saw her beloved.
Sif, who had thought she was now immune to his charms, was not as complacent as Sigyn. But when Loki fired the most dazzlingly charming smile across the room and straight into her eyes it disarmed her completely.
"My apologies Ladies...No offence was intended, it was mere curiosity that drove me here."
He proclaimed sincerely, looking most honest and noble.
Sif gulped, blinking at him through the dazzle. If such a smile could charm her even now, then there was no doubt Sigyn would forever be wrapped around his little finger.
Only Thor was not impressed and he shot his brother a disapproving look.
If Loki noticed, he didn't seem to care. He sauntered idly towards Sif again, though this time he came much closer.
She found herself holding her breath, though she didn't know why, as he reached out and took hold of the hem of the dress.
He ran his long fingers across the fabric, studying it closely. As Sif watched she recalled the way those very same fingers had previously caressed her face and hair...the memory sent a shiver along her spine and caused a sudden rise in her temperature.
"I suppose such a gown would look fair on the Lady Sigyn.."
Loki muttered, then glancing pointedly at Sif he added,
"..you and she, after all....are as different as night and day."
Sif glowered at him furiously for using the words she'd once spoken about him, against her now.
The wicked Loki. He was not unlike a rose. His beauty was distracting, so much so it was easy to become distracted by its loveliness, forgetting the potential danger. Then you end up injuring yourself on its thorns.
"Yes we are different and no doubt the gown would suit me better if I had fairer hair!"
She quipped accusingly,
Loki narrowed his eyes and pursed his lips,
"Ahh, it burns you to have hair as dark as mine? Whilst everyone else is fair and beautiful-"
"And I have you to thank for that!"
Sif interjected, oblivious to the quizzical looks they were attracting from the others gathered in the room.
To Sif's annoyance Loki responded by smiling playfully, his eyes flicking down towards her heaving bosom. He raised a dark eyebrow and blatantly stared at her chest,
"Well, you do have other...attributes Sif."
Sif's cheeks blazed with embarrassment and the way he was openly leering at her made her feel both horrified and quite giddy at the same time.
He raised his eyes again to meet her own and grinned at her wolfishly,
"As hideous as this gown may be, it does...emphasise your, um...features."
At that Thor stepped forwards into the room,
"Enough of your taunting Loki.."
He turned to look at Sif pityingly,
"..the gown is rather fetching Sif, pay no attention to his slights and inappropriate remarks."
Sif managed a weak smile, she appreciated the kind gesture.
Loki began chuckling as if to himself, and headed towards the door. Before he left he halted abruptly and turned to look back at them,
"In Midgardian legend it is said that I cut the Lady Sif's hair then threw the shorn locks at your feet Thor...as a symbol of your wife's adultery."
Thor blinked and shifted uneasily,
"The humans tell many tales involving the Gods, few are correct. Sif is not my wife and you are not her lover."
Loki shot Sif a look,
"I alone know, as I think I do know, your love besides Thor....and that was the wicked Loki."
He smiled crookedly,
"One of my favourite quotes from the Poetic Edda."
He turned on his heel and left, leaving a perplexed Thor staring after him.
"I met a medical man during my time on the Earth and he thought Loki was insane. At times such as this I'm inclined to agree."
He muttered, before sauntering out through the door, his red cloak trailing behind him.
Sigyn, clearly bewildered, excused herself and left once more through the side door.
It was then Sif noticed Frigga looking at her,
"Lady Sif, once you have changed back into your own garments, please meet me in the Great Hall...I must discuss an important matter with you."
Trying to stifle her surprise, Sif nodded dumbly,
"Of course my Queen."
Frigga smiled warmly, before leaving Sif alone with the dress makers and remaining servants.
************************
Sif was anxious to find out what Frigga wished to discuss with her. After dressing hurriedly she headed off down the main hallway.
As she passed by the open doors which led out into the courtyard, she noticed the familiar, willowy figure of Sigyn, basking in the warm sunlight.
Sif hesitated only briefly, then continued on her way but Sigyn had seen her and came rushing into the hallway,
"Lady Sif, I must speak with you!"
Sif resisted the urge to stop, she had more pressing matters to deal with. An audience with Frigga was far more important than discussing wedding gowns..
"I'm sorry Lady Sigyn, I am wanted elsewhere."
She replied, as politely as possible.
"Yes I believe so...but by whom, that is what I wish to know!"
Sigyn's words caused Sif to halt in her tracks. She spun around to face the petite woman, frowning quizzically,
"What exactly do you mean by that?"
Sif demanded.
Sigyn drew closer, emphasising their size difference. The tiny Goddess had to tilt her head upwards in order to meet Sif's eyes,
"I have attempted to question Thor but he tells me very little...he also dismisses my concerns, insisting that they are unfounded..."
She exclaimed, eyes wide, peering intensely at Sif,
"...but after having just witnessed that exchange, the cryptic words and looks you share-"
"What are you referring to? Speak plainly."
Sif interrupted sharply, though she knew only too well what she was implying.
"You...and my husband-"
"He is not yet your husband!"
Sif pointed out, and instantly regretted it.
Sigyn smiled triumphantly,
"You have just proved my point entirely! Well, he is to be my husband no matter how much you dislike the fact!"
"Before you accuse me, might I point out that in your eagerness to stake your claim on Silver Tongue, you have forgotten something, have you not?"
Sif snapped back.
And to her delight, Sigyn looked suitably confused. She had chosen her words purposefully to bewilder her.
"You do know that Silver Tongue is one of Loki's preferred kennings?"
She went on, deliberately using another ancient term.
Sigyn began to blush,
"Kennings?..I do not understand what that means-"
"It is a poetic reference to someone, an alternative name that bears no resemblance to one's actual name.."
Sif explained, revelling in Sigyn's awkwardness,
"Vulture Path is another name Loki is known by throughout the nine realms...not just Lopt."
Sigyn looked somewhat deflated now, but Sif had not yet made her point.
"Perhaps you don't know your intended so well after all. But I digress. You, firstly implied you knew I was wanted elsewhere and that you wished to know by whom-"
"I did not say-"
"Yes, you did...now, those words imply you suspect that your betrothed may desire me!"
Sif clarified, remorselessly.
"If it is so, then I must know if his...desires are reciprocated!"
Sigyn demanded, clearly flustered.
Sif regarded her coldly,
"My personal thoughts and feelings are none of your business madam..as for Loki's, you will never know his either!"
At that Sigyn turned and flounced away, defeated. Leaving Sif decidedly rattled. She had not meant to lose her temper and almost regretted the way she'd belittled Sigyn. But she had rubbed salt into a still open wound.
Sigyn may have lost this battle, but she'd already won the war. No matter how Sif taunted her, she was victorious. She was to be Loki's bride. Why wasn't that enough for her?
By the time Sif reached the Great hall, her head was pounding and her nerves were frayed.
However, it is a truth universally acknowledged, that just when you assume matters can't get any worse, they usually do.
Just as Sif entered the Hall, allowing herself to think the day couldn't possibly become any more trying or bizarre, she found herself being greeted by a concerned looking Frigga.....and Heimdall.
Sif's heart sank and she felt her stomach drop along with it. However, she was granted slight relief when Heimdall excused himself from the room, leaving the two women alone.
"There is no need to look so daunted Sif.."
Frigga smiled and gestured for her to take a seat by her.
Obediently she sat. Frigga's face was filled with concern and she placed a gentle hand upon her arm,
"Sif, I must speak frankly with you, though this matter is of a delicate and somewhat, intimate nature."
Sif blinked nervously and was about to respond when Frigga spoke again,
"I am concerned about you...I know you have difficulty sleeping and haven't been eating properly but those herbal concoctions won't remedy what ails you."
Sif instantly tensed and her chest tightened,
"Heimdall has been watching me?"
Frigga shook her head,
"He knows you have difficulty sleeping...he's told me nothing other than that, apart from mentioning the exchange he just witnessed between Sigyn and yourself.."
Sif's stomach now began to churn,
"I purchased some herbal powders from an apothecary in town, I'd hoped it would help me sleep and calm my nerves."
Sif admitted, hoping to steer away from discussing her altercation with Sigyn.
Frigga nodded sympathetically,
"I know, I too have used such medicines in my youth. But as I say, it won't remedy the underlying issue.."
Her words trailed off.
Sif sighed heavily,
"I assure you my Queen, there is no need to be concerned for me. I am merely-"
"Sick with love."
Frigga ventured, causing Sif to visibly reel in shock.
"Love?..No, I cannot possibly-"
"My dear Sif, you cannot eat, you cannot sleep....you're on edge and tetchy. These are all classic symptoms of being in love."
Sif forced a weak laugh, as she cradled her head hopelessly in her hands,
"If these are feelings of love then I'd rather be without it."
Frigga smiled gently, her eyes filled with empathy,
"They are certainly feelings of unrequited love, yes?"
Sif raised her head and looked up at the wise Queen,
"I...I'm not sure. It is complicated."
She stammered hopelessly.
Frigga took Sif's hands in her own and looked her directly in the eyes, but this was not intimidating or threatening. She looked open, honest and kind,
"Sif, you are afraid because you're unsure of a love there is no cure for. And that is why I am concerned for you....just as I am concerned for him also."
Sif sat bolt up straight and felt her grip tighten slightly in Frigga's soft, warm hands,
"H-him?"
She quivered, throat suddenly dry.
Frigga smiled again, a genuine heart-warming smile that displayed love in her eyes,
"Yes...my son."
Sif's hands now began to tremble, and her heartbeat quickened,
"My Queen, Thor and I aren't-"
She fell silent as Frigga suddenly chuckled heartily.
"Sif, I have two eyes you know, just like I have two sons....it's Loki I'm referring to."