‘I WAS CHEATED BY YOU AND I THINK YOU KNOW WHEN!’
‘SO I MADE UP MY MIND, IT MUST COME TO AN END!’
The shouts of Abba were coming from Lily and Mary who had just put on their record and started singing along. Both of them were completely drunk, even though the party had only started an hour ago.
From the comfortable couch, Marlene scoffed.
‘Lightweights. Dora, go and get Lily before she falls off that table.’
Pandora and Emmeline got up to rescue their girlfriends, leaving more space for Marlene and Dorcas on the sofa.
The Marauders had decided to throw a small party for themselves and their close friends. It wasn’t very exciting yet; Sirius and James weren’t here and Regulus, Evan and Remus were looking half asleep in a corner.
Barty and Peter were trying to keep the spirit alive, hyping the girls up from the corner where they sat singing along.
Fifteen minutes into the gathering, Sirius and James had left the party to get more Firewhiskey and had not returned for forty five minutes. Dorcas was cuddling Marlene, hoping for a bit more fun or at least some weed.
Just as the song changed, the dorm door swung open and two boys interrupted Voulez Vous, much to the girls’ disappointment.
‘We’re back! And you won’t guess what we’ve got!’
‘That’s right Prongs… something so cool that you lot cannot possibly fathom!’
Remus rolled his eyes but looked interested, as did everyone else in the room. Questioning looks were sent towards the boys and Sirius dramatically pulled out a small vial of clear liquid, smirking as he did so.
‘Wow Sirius, a baby-sized portion of vodka. Congrats on the big find.’, Regulus said dryly.
‘Don’t be stupid Reg, it’s not vodka. And children don’t drink alcohol anyway. It’s veritaserum.’
Everyone sat up and crowded around Sirius and James.
No one asked where they found the truth potion because the Marauders were always sneaking around and could probably run an illegal drug ring if they wanted to. No one was entirely sure they didn’t - everyone knew Peter used to deal and Remus always had weed and cigarettes around if people wanted a smoke.
‘Anyone want to play Never Have I Ever?’
Everyone agreed to James’ suggestion and they sat down in a circle on the floor. They prepared shot glasses and passed around the Firewhiskey and veritaserum.
‘Okay! I’m starting because I found the veritaserum. Never have I ever kissed more than one person this room.’
Barty, Regulus, James, Mary and Lily all took a shot. Sirius looked a little confused at Regulus but decided to ignore it as Emmeline had her turn.
‘Never have I ever slept with more than 10 people.’
Regulus took a shot, purposefully maintaining eye contact with Sirius.
‘WHAT? WHO?’
‘Let’s see… obviously Barty, three Ravenclaws, two Hufflepuffs, seven Slytherins and um… one Gryffindor.’
Sirius counted on his fingers.
‘14 PEOPLE! JESUS REG, YOU’RE ONLY SIXTEEN!’
Sirius looked like he was going to combust and James was glaring at the wall so Mary put a calming spell on them, and then asked a .
‘Never have I ever… had a crush on someone in this room. Not including your current partner or Remus, because everyone likes him.’
Both Barty and Evan took a shot, looking at each other and blushing furiously before looking anywhere else. Dorcas and Pandora shared a knowing look with Regulus who gave them a confirming nod in response.
Peter was next, and he knew just what to ask thanks to Pandora.
‘Never have I ever not asked someone out because I think it’ll ruin our friendship.’
Only Barty took a shot at this and Evan looked down at his lap.
‘Come on Ev, you aren’t going to leave me hanging are you darling?’, Barty pouted. Evan couldn’t look back at him.
‘Never have I ever flirted with someone a lot to avoid my true feelings. And then played it off as a joke.’
Barty swallowed and took another shot. At the rate he was going, he’d be dying of his hangover in the morning.
‘Never have I ever been in love with someone in this room.’
Evan and Barty took a shot as did Sirius, Remus, James and Regulus.
‘What?’, questioned Sirius. ‘Regulus?’
Regulus sent him a look but Sirius didn’t ignore it this time.
‘No seriously, who the fuck is fucking my brother? It’s not funny. Reg, we’re going to play a game. I ask a question and you answer.’
Regulus scowled at him but knew the veritaserum wouldn’t allow him to lie. Sirius didn’t notice James’ guilty look as he and Regulus exchanged a glance.
‘Ok first of all, house?’
‘Gryffindor’
Barty gasped, ‘Reg! Sleeping with the enemy!’ This earned him a glare from both Sirius and Regulus.
‘Eye colour.’
‘Brown.’
‘Okay… not Lily, not Marls. Shit! Mary, what on earth? One Black brother wasn’t enough for you? Is it Mary?’
Regulus slowly shook his head and Sirius gaped.
‘Right, who has brown eyes here? Peter has blue, Moony has brown but he’s my boyfriend, Prongs has brown, let’s see who else…’
Sirius looked around and realised there were no other Gryffindors in the room.
‘Prongs… please tell me I’m wrong.’
‘Um, well. Kind of.’ James winced.
‘So you’re just using my brother for sex? WHAT THE FUCK?’
‘Not exactly Pads, I love him.’
‘NOT EXACTLY? HOW NOT EXACTLY? I THINK I GET THE PICTURE! OH, JAMES YOU’RE HOT LET ME FUCK YOU! OH REGGIE, I’M FINDING MYSELF LET ME EXPERIMENT WITH YOU! HOW DARE YOU?’
‘Okay well that’s fair. I’m sorry Pads - it just sort of happened. I do love him though. Please Padfoot.’
Sirius clenched his jaw, got up and pointed at the door.
‘Regulus, James, with me. The rest of you, do whatever you want. We need to talk.’
The others took the fact that James wasn’t dead yet as a good sign, prayed for his life and continued the game.
—
‘Never have I ever been a gay male.’
Evan took a shot.
‘Never have I ever fancied my best friend.’
Evan and Barty both took shots, eyes diverted away from each other again.
At this point in the game, everyone had caught on to what Dorcas, Pandora and Peter were trying to do. Barty and Evans’ feelings for each other were so painfully obvious but neither would admit it. They weren’t even figuring it out now, when their entire friend group were literally questioning them into seeing it.
Dorcas decided it was time for drastic measures.
‘Never have I ever been in love with Evan Rosier at this very moment.’
Evan finally looked at Barty, who reluctantly took a shot before awkwardly getting up onto the spare bed and casting spells so no one could get past the drapes.
Mary and Marlene whispered something to the rest of the group and they hurried out of the room, presumably to the girls dorms as James and Regulus were still being interrogated in the common room.
Evan felt like the world was collapsing in on itself but also that he was happier than ever before. He had to fix this, for him and Barty.
‘Bat?’ he said tentatively, ‘Please open up. Let me in.’
After a few moments Barty undid the charms and Evan slid into bed with him before they were restored.
Barty’s glittery eyeliner was smudged and he had clearly been crying.
‘Ev.. look, I’m sorry for ruining our friendship and stuff.’
‘No, Bat you didn’t. I.. love you too.’
Barty turned to look at Evan so hard his neck cricked. He had a Quidditch accident the previous year which made it extremely easy for him to pull his neck muscles.
‘What?’ whispered Barty, ‘You love me back?’
‘Of course I do. Since bloody fourth year. You’re perfect. If anything, I don’t deserve you; I’m much more likely to screw this up than you.’
‘What do you mean Ev? Nothing could change the way I feel about you.’
Evan’s smile fell and he sat up from under the duvet. He hadn’t told anyone this secret because it always ended with his relationships being broken and him being labelled as a ‘freak’ or a ‘weirdo’.
‘I’m asexual. Like, I don’t feel sexual attraction. Not to you, not to anyone. I never want to have sex.’
‘Hey, Ev, that’s fine. I want you, not the sex.’
‘No, Barty, you think that but it’s not true. If we get together then it means you can’t have sex. Ever. And I won’t be fine with you sleeping with someone else as a casual hookup. I can’t satisfy your needs.’
‘Look at me Evan. That’s totally fine. I mean hey, I have a hand. Besides, if it meant I was with you I would give up sex forever. I can still cuddle you and kiss you and take you on dates.’
Evan had started crying. No one had ever just accepted him as easily as that.
‘Thank you Bat. I can’t tell you how much this means to me.’
‘Hey, Ev. Do you…. want to go on a date with me next Hogsmeade visit?’
Evan nodded happily and Barty beamed and they cuddled together, plans already forming in their minds.
‘Barty, I know this is a bit early and all but since we’re going on a date soon.
Do you want to be my boyfriend?’
‘Yes, Ev! I love you so much.’
‘I love you more.’ Evan replied.
And he did. He really did love him.