nat has an idea
When Steve got home that afternoon, he literally collapsed on his bed and slept until the sun came up the next day. He only remembers vaguely, but surely, that Clint had walked in sometime that night and shook him awake.
"Stevie, wake up."
"Nhgggf."
"Same though."
"Nnnngo away," Steve moaned.
"Come on, we have plans with Nat and Sam and his roommate, and I want you to come," Clint pressed on.
"Fuck off."
"Steeeeve, please come. I know you're tired but you should come out with me, get a change of scenery," Clint insisted.
"And you should fuck off," Steve flipped his head to the other side of the pillow so that he was facing the wall, and not Clint.
"You're an asshole, Nat's gonna be mad at you, and I won't be there to help you when the claws come out," Clint walks out the room and slams the door behind him. He grabs his keys, his phone and wallet, and leaves the apartment and starts walking toward the car. He grabs his phone out and dials Nat's number.
"Hey, asshole," Nat teased on the other line.
"Hey, I couldn't get Cap up, so it's just gonna be me coming to you," Clint says and rolls his eyes at the though of Steve sprawled on his bed, drooling.
"Did you even fucking try, Barton?"
"Yeah, I did, so don't be mad at me," Clint opens the car door and slides into the drivers seat. "I'll be there in a few, bye bitch."
"Fuck you, asshole."
"Love you babe," Clint teases.
"You wish I was your babe," Nat retorts.
"Hell yeah, I do," Clint says back, and hangs up the phone. He starts the car and heads over to Nat's apartment in the dorms area, praying that Pepper won't be there.
Obviously, she was there, but that doesn't happen until later, so have patience, reader.
Clint walks up the stairs of Nat's dorm building, and lets himself into her dorm. The dorm was bigger than your average college dorm, mostly since Pepper's father was the president of the college, and Nat was smart enough to befriend her when she decided to live on campus.
The dorm, when one walks in, has a small kitchen, fixed with a stove and a mini fridge and the college necessity, a microwave- also known as the reason Nat basically survives. Following the kitchen was a small living room, which has a fluffy sofa, adorned with like a bajillion pillows and blankets. There was the coffee table, and then another smaller couch, similarly adorned to it's bigger companion. The bathroom was on the other side of the room, and right near where the television is, was the door to Nat's room, which was next to Pepper's room.
All in all, it was the first place that Bucky, Nat, Sam and Clint ever really all got along.
The night started off slow, when Sam and Bucky walked in through the door, the latter bearing a box of pizza, and a look of utter discomfort. They had arrived a few minutes after Clint, who had comfortably situated himself on the larger couch, with his feet resting on the coffee table, and a beer in his hand.
"Hey Sam!" he called from inside, Sam and Bucky followed Nat through the hallway, past the kitchen and into the living room, with Nat rolling her eyes at the sight of Clint sitting lazily.
"Hey Barton, nice of you to get up and say hello to the guest," Nat retorts, and he flips the bird at her, making Sam laugh.
"I know what will get his lazy ass up," Sam says. "Clint, we have pizza."
Clint was, needless to say, a sucker for pizza. He rushed to where Sam was, and Nat grabbed the box from Bucky and lightly tossed it on the table. "Sit down, guys. Bucky, would you like a beer?"
Clint almost forgot about Bucky.
"Bucky! Great to see you man!" Clint exclaimed with his mouth stuffed with pizza.
"Um, yeah I could go for a beer, thanks Natasha," Bucky says awkwardly.
"Natasha is what my grandma used to call me, and she's dead, so please," Nat walks into the kitchen and calls. "Please call me Nat."
"Fair enough, Nat," Bucky gives a small smile. He was shocked at her kindness considering the last time (long story, involving too much booze and a lot of Chinese take-out). He and Sam sat down at the table, and each respectively grabbed their own slices.
"Hey, Clint, where's that roommate of yours?" Sam asks through a mouthful of pizza.
"You two need to learn some fucking table manners," Nat grimaces at the sight of Clint opening his pizza-filled mouth to answer. She walks back in from the kitchen and hands Bucky and Sam both a beer.
"Aw, honey, you love it when I talk dirty," Clint says, and sticks his tongue out, yet again covered in chewed up pizza.
"You're fucking gross, Barton," Nat says, and grabs a slice and sits next to Bucky. "See Bucky over here, chews his food nicely, with his mouth closed, along with his tongue and food in it. Learn from Bucky."
Bucky looks at Nat, then looks back at Clint and Sam, and looks at Nat again. He pauses, thinking for a moment, and then sticks his tongue out, which was, of course, accompanied with chewed up pizza. Clint and Sam cheer and high five, and Bucky smiles sheepishly.
"I knew there was a reason I liked you, Buck-O," Clint claps his hand on Bucky's shoulder and smiles.
"You're all gross," Nat says, and takes another bite of her slice.
"NATASHA, WHY ARE THERE A GROUP OF AGGRESSIVELY-TONED AND ATTRACTIVE MEN IN OUR APARTMENT?"
Clint grimaces, and rolls his eyes at the sound of Pepper's shrill voice.
Pepper stood at the doorframe of her room, looking intently at the group sitting at the table eating pizza.
"Pep, this is Sam and Bucky, they go to school here," Nat replies calmly. "Want a slice?"
Pepper walks over to the table. "Is it gluten free?" she asks, knowing well what the answer would be.
"No," Nat replies.
"Then, no thank you, Natasha," Pepper smiles politely. She looks over at Sam and and Bucky, and smiles. "I am Pepper Potts, pleasure to meet you."
Bucky looks at her curiously, "your father is-"
"Yes, my father is Jackson Potts, president of the school," Pepper interrupts, and Bucky jumps a little at the shrillness of her voice. "Well, I must be on my way, I have a date."
"A date?" Clint says suspiciously, pausing to finish chewing his pizza. "Who would go on a date- better yet, who would willingly be seen with you?"
"Oh, Clint, I know your sarcastic humor and dry comments are only a ploy to disguise your pent-up, everlasting love for me," Pepper says sweetly, and pats his hand. "You'll find love one day, Clint Barton."
"Um, okay."
"But, if you truly are curious, I am going on a date with Tony Stark."
Sam spits out his beer. "Stark?!"
"Yes?" Pepper replies, utterly confused.
Sam starts hysterical laughing. "Stark? You're serious? Tony 'I would never touch a girl with a ten foot pole' Stark?" he laughs again, and Bucky and the rest of them look him curiously. "Man, I call bullshit on that!"
"I regret to inform you that I am, in fact, going on a date with Tony," Pepper responds, and Nat rolls her eyes.
"Pepper, just go before one of these idiots end up choking on something," she says, and Bucky laughs.
"Alright, you have a fun night," Pepper says suspiciously, and walks away from the table and to the front door. "Don't stay up too late, Natasha, we have Poli-Sci tomorrow morning at 8:30!" she calls from the front door, and closes it behind her.
A few moments pass.
"Is she always like that?" Bucky asks.
"Yep, and this is a quiet day, believe it or not," Nat responds quietly, and smiles at Bucky.
"Dude, who the hell willingly goes out with Tony fucking Stark?" asks Sam, utterly confused.
"Pepper Potts, that's who," Clint responds
"I'll drink to that," Nat says dryly, and lifts her beer up. Bucky reaches over and taps his bottle with hers as a silent cheers, making Nat smile.
"I like you, Bucky," she says, as-a-matter-of-factly.
"Hey, no, he's mine!" Sam jumps up from across the table and races over to Bucky and wraps his arms around him. "You keeps your dirty paws off of him, Romanoff!"
Clint laughs as Nat flips Sam the middle finger, and Bucky tries to tear Sam's arms off of him. "Dude, get the hell off of me!"
"Never, my love, I'm never letting go!" Sam cries dramatically.
"Awwww, move over Jack and Rose," Clint yells. "There's a new disgustingly romantic couple in town, all muscles and manliness!"
Nat sniggers, and Bucky rolls his eyes. "Sam, get off me, you weirdo, or I'm telling them about the time you met that girl at the bar and went home with her, and then decided to-"
"NO," Sam cries horrifically, and let's go and runs over back to his seat.
"Ugh, now I'm curious," Clint says, in an exaggerated whine. "Bucky, tell us!"
"NO BUCKY!" Sam cries and chucks his bottle cap at Bucky, who was smiling slyly. Nat was sitting back in her seat and enjoying her slice.
"Tell us, tell us, tell us!" Clint chants, and Bucky opens his mouth.
"James Buchanan Barnes, if you say another word I will beat your ass up," Sam threatens.
Clint pauses, looks at Sam for a moment, and then continues to chant. Bucky started laughing and Nat continued chewing, and the rest of the night basically went on like that.
Nat kept on looking over at Bucky, who she couldn't help but think would really like Steve.
She had an idea.
***
"Would you just tell us already?" Clint pressed on to Bucky, who was sitting next to Nat on the big couch, animatedly talking to her about the classes that he was taking this semester.
Nat had decided to learn more about Bucky, who was taking a whole bunch of science classes, but as a promise to his mother had signed up for an art history course as compensation for all the nerdy science and technology. When Nat heard art history, her idea now became a full-fledged plan.
Bucky paused from talking to Nat, and looked over at Clint, who was currently in a headlock, curtesy of Sam Wilson. "Ugh, fine. He thought it would be sexy if he-"
"Bucky Barnes, I'm literally never gonna talk to you-"
"If he completely stripped, and laid out on the couch with a can of whipped cream and Frank Sinatra playing in the background-"
"WHAT," Clint wheezed, and laughed hysterically.
"Bucky!" Sam exclaimed.
"Needless to say, she was quite terrified and didn't find it a little endearing," Bucky sniggered. "She ended up screaming and kicked him out on the street without his clothes." Even Nat was laughing at that point. "He called me, and I had to pick him up from the apartment-"
"I hate you so much," Sam had let go of Clint and sat on the couch, his head in a pillow.
"He was hiding behind a bush, which unfortunately contained poison ivy," Bucky continued, and Clint had tears in his eyes. "It was an interesting night, nevertheless," Bucky laughed.
"I hate you so fucking much, you asshole," Sam whined.
"I discovered that night, after rubbing Sam down with anti-itch cream, that he is highly ticklish behind his neck-"
"I knew that already," Nat commented, laughing.
"And he has a birthmark shaped like Texas on his ass-"
"I knew that already," Clint said dryly, and Sam whacked him with a pillow as Clint, Nat and Bucky laughed. "Afghanistan lead to many interesting nights, I'll just leave it at that."
"I hate you all," Sam lamented.
Nat sniggered, "Clint, you're not any better. You hooked up with a drag queen when we went downtown on our trip to New York City."
Bucky and Sam laughed. "I have no reason to be embarrassed, Natasha, it turns out I am quite comfortable with the male anatomy," he says, and sips his beer. "Derek and I had a great night," he continued, as-a-matter-of-factly.
Bucky laughs again. "You're quite comfortable with your sexuality then?"
"Unlike Natasha over here, yes I am. She hooked up with some hot chick in Vegas when we went last year, and she had a midlife crisis."
"Hey!"
Sam and Bucky were laughing as Nat got up and smacked Clint's arm.
"For the record, Katie and I still keep in touch, and when she's in town, we hang out," Nat purrs, and Clint turns red as she pat his shoulder and walked away to the kitchen to grab another beer.
"Anyways," she calls out from the kitchen, "Sam, have any juicy stories about mister Bucky over there?" and Sam laughs as Bucky turns red.
Clint regains his composure, and resumes his teasing. "Aw, Bucky's turning red! Sammy, give us the dirt!"
"Actually," Bucky says as Nat walks back in the living room, "I'm certain that Sam doesn't have any dirt on me," and Sam nods in agreement.
"Yeah, man, not gonna lie, but for the few years I've known Bucky, he hasn't really gone on dates or done anything remotely stupid," Sam admits. "He's the sane one in this relationship," he says teasing, and ruffles Bucky's hair.
"I've been on dates... and stuff!" Bucky turned red. "It's just... I haven't really met anyone interesting enough to really, you know..." he says, scratching his neck awkwardly.
"Awwwww, Nat, I think I have a new favorite person, I'm bumping you down to number two on the list," Clint coos.
"Bucky," Nat gasps, "I owe you my life," she rasps and grabs his forehead and kisses him, only to have a bottle cap thrown at her butt by Clint.
"Y'all are idiots," Sam says, and lies back into the couch.
"Shut up, bird boy," Nat says, and Sam throws Bucky a dirty look.
"Hey, I told you it would catch on!" Bucky exclaims, and Sam flips his middle finger at him.
They ended up hanging out until 2 am, and Pepper still had not come back yet. As Sam and Bucky were leaving out the door, and Nat and Clint exchanging goodbyes, a horrific look appeared on Clint's face.
"Guys."
Bucky, Nat and Sam looked at Clint.
"Pepper's not home yet, do you think that she and Tony are-"
"OH MY GOD THAT IS GROSS," Sam whines loudly, and Nat and Bucky laugh.
"I'm literally having nightmares tonight, I'm cringing right now," Clint makes a face.
"I hate you both so much," Nat complains, and Bucky laughs as he drags Sam away, yelling good night. Nat closes the door behind them and turns to Clint.
"I have an idea."
***