Star Wars/Trek
After four and a half minutes, Steve just couldn't take it anymore. It wasn't like he had that much to lose - oh no, wait, he did. He had everything to lose, and so did Bucky. But as much as Steve knew it was an idiotic decision, he couldn't bring himself to regret it when he saw the frosty layer inside the cryogenic tube melt away, and the glass cover slide back.
Bucky's eyes opened slowly. He of course had no idea how long he had been unconscious for, which was an intimidating thought. Had it been days? Months? Years? He took in Steve's concerned expression, and immediately began panicking.
"How long has it been, Steve? What's the date? Are we under attack?" He leapt out of the cryo tube and tried to unsheathe an imaginary sword from an imaginary scabbard.
Steve laughed, a deep, rumbling thing that started in his chest and rolled out of his mouth in a wave. "No, Buck. It's actually only been just under three hours since you were iced."
"Oh, God, they've found us that quickly?"
"No," Steve said, reluctant to admit anymore.
"Well then," Bucky said, not yet willing to relax, "Why am I awake?"
"The truth? I... missed you."
Bucky smiled, before realising the implications of what Steve had done. "Steve, how could you? I did this specifically so that you," he jabbed Steve in the chest, "would be okay. You know that I'm dangerous." He paused, smiling sadly. "My mind is just too susceptible to Hydra's control, as much as I wish it wasn't."
"I know, Buck. I know. I didn't mean to turn it off, I just... I don't know how to keep doing this without you."
Bucky leaned forward, patting Steve on the shoulder. "You're Captain America, man. That's awesome. You managed fine without me before, you really don't need me now." His tone was resigned, and a little crestfallen that he was no longer needed to pick Steve up and sort him out after another back alley tussle with a six-foot-something brute.
"That's just it. As crazy as it may sound, it's almost like I need you more than I did before the serum. I know that sounds stupid, but... our lives were so much simpler back then, even if I was somewhat," he searched for the right word, "small."
Bucky shrugged. "Yes, but you also have more people to help you out now. I mean, no offence, but back then I was your only friend. Literally; you were a complete loner before I took you under my wing." Bucky grinned as he finished his thought.
Steve frowned. "Not a complete loner-"
"Yes. I'm sorry, Steve, but you were."
Steve frowned again. "Well, anyway, even if I did have more friends since I became an Avenger, they're all gone now," he said, bitterly.
Bucky hung his head, and stared down at his feet, trying to hide how ashamed and guilty his expression was.
Steve's face filled with horror as he realised what he had said. "Oh no, Buck I didn't mean that, I'm so sorry. I would choose you a thousand times over the rest of them, I'm so, so sorry."
Bucky's face still remained firmly angled towards his toes.
"Please, Bucky. I really, really didn't mean that." Steve's tone was emphatic.
Bucky's face didn't shift upwards, and when he spoke, it was so quietly Steve had to crane his neck forwards to hear him.
"But it's true. I know it's not what you meant, but it's still true. I- we-" Bucky took a shaky breath, and tried again. "You gave up everything; being an Avenger, being part of a team-" Bucky lifted his head upwards a little, but he was still nowhere close to meeting Steve's eyes. "For me. And there's absolutely no doubt in my mind when I say I don't deserve it, because I don't. You are such a good man, and I- well, I'm not."
Steve gently placed his hand on Bucky's chin and tilted his head upwards, to meet his eyes. "Hey. Don't you ever say that you are not a good man, because that-" Steve's voice broke and he had to try again. "That is the stupidest thing I have ever heard you say, and Buck, you are not a stupid man. Nothing that you have done, nothing, since becoming the Winter Soldier, is your fault. You hear me? None of it."
Bucky tried to shake his head, but Steve's fingers were still on his chin, so he couldn't.
"Buck. I want you to listen to me very carefully, because this is important." He spoke the next part slowly, so there was no way Bucky could miss it. "You are not the Winter Soldier. You hear me? You are not the same person. You are a victim." There were tears in his eyes, that he was blinking away, and his voice was rough from emotion. "Okay?"
Bucky nodded, partly just to stop him from talking, and partly because he could see that Steve was never going to accept that Bucky had become a monster.
Steve suddenly grabbed him by the upper arm, and pulled him in for a rough hug. It was awkward and uncomfortable, until Bucky sighed and relaxed into him, burying his face in Steve's shoulder. They stayed like that for a few blissful seconds, until Steve cleared his throat manly, and clapped him on the back again, several hard times. Bucky rolled his eyes when he was sure that Steve wasn't looking.
Steve smiled at him, warmly. Steve was fantastic at smiling - he gave them out like they didn't cost him anything, and they always reached to his eyes - they were always sincere. Bucky didn't find it so easy; at least, not as easy as he used to.
"Do you want to go and watch a movie or something? I started watching Star Wars..." Steve trailed off, thoughtfully. "Or was it Star Trek? I don't know, but anyway, they're pretty cool."
Bucky frowned. "I thought I was going back," he jerked his head to the cryogenic tube behind him, "in there." He looked exhausted, and slightly pathetic.
Steve just looked pained. "Please, can you hold off, at least until tomorrow? We'll talk about it then, just please, stay here for today."
Bucky looked as if he was about to object, but then just nodded. "Okay."
Steve beamed, and this smile seemed to light up the whole room. "Great! I have all these movies on my list, and until now I haven't actually had the chance to watch them, but I started watching a few days ago, and wow. And there's something called a DVD now, which I haven't quite figured out yet, but..."
Steve continued talking, but Bucky had to tune him out. He found it hard sometimes to listen to a person talk for a prolonged period of time, because Bucky still wasn't used to conversation, or even having someone to converse with. Don't misunderstand, Bucky was grateful and very relieved to have his friend back, but the transition period from being completely alone to having the whole of Team Cap to talk to, and now with Steve talking his ear off all day - it was going to be difficult. He just needed to take things one step at a time, and...
"Hey, you ok?" Steve looked concerned.
"Yeah, yeah, just - I'm not really used to company, you know?"
"Yeah, of course. That's okay, if I've been talking too long or doing something that's uncomfortable or upsetting for you, just tell me, okay?"
Bucky bit his lip. He wasn't used to this version of Steve; the Steve that was more capable than him, bigger and better and less fragile. He wasn't used to Steve feeling sympathetic for him, in the past it had been the other way around. Sure, it was great that Steve cared about him, but Bucky still found it slightly unsettling; this completely upside down world.
"Sure," he said, slightly forced. If Steve noticed, he pretended not to.
However, once they were watching the film, it didn't take long before Bucky had been cheered up. Steve had been right, Star Wars/Trek (they still hadn't figured out exactly which one it was) was excellent, and Bucky soon lost himself in the intergalactic space battles and the little furry things that were apparently called Ewoks.
Whilst Bucky couldn't completely ignore the stopclock that had been placed on him, (he still fully intended to go back into the cryogenic tube the next day), after a while he almost forgot about it, and relaxed, both into the film and Steve's company.
Halfway through Star Wars/Trek, Steve looked up to see Bucky enraptured by a rather intense lightsaber battle, and smiled. He scooted up the sofa towards Bucky, still grinning. Bucky grinned back.
Steve decided that from that moment on, as long as he could keep Bucky grinning, everything would be okay.