"Thank you, Brucey-Bear," Tony crooned as Bruce handed him a plate of eggs. The other man just rolled his eyes and turned back to the stove. "You're welcome, Tony."
Tony happily skipped over to the couches where Natasha and Clint were sitting. As soon as he sat down, Natasha kicked her feet up onto his lap and rested the back of her head on Clint's knee.
"Where am I supposed to put this plate if you've got your feet on my legs?" Tony asked, holding the plate of eggs up like it was Simba from The Lion King.
Natasha just smiled and turned her nose back into her Agatha Christie book, leaving the genius to actually hold the plate with one hand and eat from the other. (To Tony, this was the worst thing that could possibly happen to him.)
In the kitchen, Steve was handed a plate and immediately smiled. "Thank you, Dr. Banner. It smells delicious."
Bruce blushed slightly and waved it off. "Call me Bruce."
Soon they all had plates of steaming delicious Breakfasts, Tony and Bruce with those fucking amazing eggs, Clint and Natasha with Indian chole masala, and Steve with his forever-the-same-ordinary-boring-lame omelette. Tony hated that omelette.
As they sat and ate in comfortable quiet, watching the Saturday reruns of Harry Potter, the news flashed on.
"...there seem to be giant bees attacking Albany, New York, and the citizens of the area have been told that they need to evacuate immediately or stay in a secure underground location..."
Just as the headline was coming up, JARVIS spoke up and the Assemble call went out. "Sir, Director Fury is calling-"
"Tell him we're on our way," Tony said quickly. Everyone set their now-empty plates down and hurried to go suit up.
---
Saying 'giant bees' was putting it lightly. They were big, sure- like, human-sized-, but the real issue was the stinging bit. It was overly long and pointed, drenched in some sort of sticky sap. Steve was having trouble keeping in the contents of his stomach as they got slathered in it. (That poor omelette was coming back up-)
It didn't help that the stingers were on their foreheads, like a unicorn horn.
Bruce had already transformed, and the big green rage monster looked none too happy about being covered in the goo.
"Don't let those things sting you," Clint called through COMMs.
"Yeah- I thought that was obvious-" Tony snapped.
"Cut the chitchat, would'ya boys?" Natasha grunted, heaving a now-unconscious bee off of a citizen and pulling them to safety. "I'm having a hard enough time concentrating as it is."
Tony was unable to respond as the queen bee came out of absolutely nowhere and jammed her stinger into the suit, effectively breaking the reactor. He let out a sharp gasp before the suit went offline. Steve saw him fall.
"Stark!" He yelled.
Bang. And that fucking hurt, even if he wasn't too far up. Tony gasped for breath. "The reactor- it's- it's b-broken-" He choked out. "I've gotta sp're in my lab-" But he cut off as he noticed the bee coming back, aiming her stinger again and readying it to finish him off-
"AAAAAAWRR!" The hulk came barreling through wasps, before completely covering Tony's prone form. The wasp turned in surprise, and it's stinger buried itself into the Hulk's shoulder.
"Bruce-" Tony rasped, feeling darkness prick his vision as the ARC reactor failed. The hulk let out a roar of pain before falling forwards, successfully crushing the Queen and killing her, before both Tony and Bruce went under.
---
Steve was tired.
Okay, that was putting it lightly. He wasn't 'tired', but he wasn't to the point of 'Tony's regular schedule'. He didn't think it was possible for anyone other than Tony Stark to get there.
Still, waiting in the uncomfortable chairs of a hospital hallway, waiting to see if Bruce was okay after taking that stab that saved Tony's life... it wasn't exactly a pleasant situation. And Tony was not helping, instead pacing anxiously next to the door, fingers drumming on the reactor, not even bothering to hide the fear plastered on his face.
After the ARC reactor had been shattered by the queen bee Tony hit the ground- hard. Then the hulk jumped in front of him and managed to get a good stab to the shoulder. The sap on the stinger was apparently poisoned, so the hulk went out, luckily falling forwards and killing the Queen. Tony was unconscious and he had to be rushed back to his lab to get the replacement reactor, along with a split for a broken arm. He was pretty shaken.
Steve was glad that Bruce managed to kill the queen bee, because when she died the rest of the bees immediately flew away and ceased the attack.
They got Bruce to the hospital- because the stab wound was still there and still gaping, and they got Tony's arm and reactor fixed up. But while Tony came back to consciousness, Bruce had to be under heavy sedation for the next two days.
He was supposed to wake up that day, so the rest of the team had been waiting outside the door for hours. (Tony had refused to leave for the entire two days- not even falling asleep in the chair, just staying awake and saying he felt too sick to eat anything.)
Steve was worried about Tony. Not because of his injuries, but because he worried Tony would blame himself.
The tapping on the reactor began again, snapping Steve out of his memories.
Tony swung around, looking completely insane. "He should be awake by now, dammit!"
"It's going to take time. His body needs to heal," Natasha said calmly.
"But he's going to be fine, Tony," Clint added. "The doctors said that with the gamma radiation, he's healing twice as quickly, and overall it wasn't a life-threatening injury."
Those kind words of wisdom didn't seem to calm Tony down much, so Steve stood up and put a hand on the engineer's shoulder, making him completely freeze. "Tony." He stated, waiting for Tony to get his breathing in order.
"Bruce will be fine."
Tony slumped, slowly sitting back down.
---
"Are you here for Dr. Bruce Banner?" A nurse asked, glancing at his clipboard.
They all stood up, Tony's energy and worry renewed. "Yes." Clint answered for them.
"He's awake," The nurse said cheerfully, leading them into the room.
---
When Bruce waved at them from the gurney, the rest of the team noticeably relaxed. Steve expected Tony to rush in and immediately start fussing over the doctor, but to his surprise, Tony stayed to the back of the group after he saw Bruce wave at them.
"Hey, guys." Bruce said tiredly.
"Good to see you alive," Natasha drawled.
Bruce laughed, looking around to make sure everyone else was doing alright. Natasha had a few bandages on her arm, and three stitches across her forehead. Clint looked a bit better since he had the best ranged weapon, although he had a gnarly black eye. Steve was limping and his eyes looked irritated and swollen.
And then Tony, of course. With a sling and splint on his arm, bruises dotting his face and huge massive bruising and welts where his arm was visible. Bruce immediately saw that he hadn't slept in days. (And he could guess why.)
Tony's eyes weren't meeting his, and he was trailing behind.
"How is everyone?" He asked.
Steve gave him a reassuring smile. "Don't worry about us. We're all doing okay. Just need food and sleep."
Bruce nodded. "The doctors said I could be released in a few days if I keep healing the way I am. Like you said- food and sleep." There was a long, exhausted pause before Bruce awkwardly began, "Hey, Tony, can we talk?"
Steve and Clint shot him relieved glances. Tony looked up and smirked. "Don't wait up, you guys."
---
"Tony, it wasn't your fault."
"It was."
"It wasn't."
"If I hadn't been there, you wouldn't have had to-"
Bruce's brow pulled together angrily. "I didn't have to do anything, Tony. I wanted to. And evidently, so did the other guy." It was a good thing the sedatives were keeping the other guy from breaking loose.
Tony shrugged, but Bruce saw the emotions he was hiding.
"I'm glad you're okay," He finally said. "And thanks for saving my life. But never do it again."
Bruce laughed. "Try telling that to the other guy. I'm sure he'll take it well."
He finally talked Tony into going back with the others and getting some rest and food. Steve was forever grateful.
---
The morning afterwards, everyone realized that the last few days had been so hectic that they had completely skipped most meals, including breakfast. After twenty minutes of them all waiting on the couch, Natasha spoke up.
"Bruce isn't making breakfast."
Well, that much was obvious. But it made Clint stand up and sigh. "We're going to have to make it ourselves. Without him."
Steve looked ill at the thought of not getting his perfectly-perfect omelette. Tony grimaced at the lack of eggs. Clint fell to his knees and wept. Natasha grew up and walked over to the kitchen, looking through the fridge to see what was available.
"There's cereal," She suggested.
"Fruit loops?" Steve asked.
"Froot," Clint corrected. "You're saying it wrong. It's not pronounced 'frewt', it's 'froot'." Steve rolled his eyes in exasperation. "I still can't tell if they did that on purpose or not."
"-There's ice cream?" Natasha cut in, going through the freezer. "And some sort of green goo, and-"
"That's a project!" Tony screamed quickly, sitting up from the couch. "That's a project, do not eat that!"
Steve gaped. "If it's an inedible science project, why the hell is it in the freezer?!"
Tony glared at him. "Because I was working on it in the goddamn kitchen!"
"But what if we didn't know and one of us-"
---
It took another two hours until they finally decided.
...to organize the kitchen and get rid of whatever Tony dubbed a science project, that is.
Apparently half of the things they had been eating for the past months had been 'slightly poisonous'.
---
"Are these eggs good or Tony's?" Clint asked, holding up a cardboard package of them. Tony put up mock-offense. "Hey! I told you guys I didn't experiment on any eggs!"
Clint laughed and set them down on the counter. "Fine, well. I guess we're making eggs."
"Agent Barton, I regret to inform you that while Mr. Stark has, indeed, not experimented on those eggs, I would advise against eating any of them," JARVIS's voice rang out. Clint groaned and thumped his head against the counter top. "What's wrong with them, JARVIS?"
The AI sounded genuinely amused. "In a desperate attempt to get Mr. Stark to sleep, a few weeks ago, I had DUMM-E inject the given eggs with a sleeping drug."
Tony's head shot up. "You what?!"
"Drugged you, sir. Several times."
The billionaire sulked for a moment. "That's why I fell asleep on Thursday..."
"You hadn't slept in four days, Sir."
Tony glared at the eggs and threw them away. "I can still donate you to the closest community college, JARVIS."
---
By the time they decided to give up on breakfast, after cleaning the entire kitchen, throwing away half the now contaminated food, and nearly getting Steve and Natasha poisoned on several occasions, it was dinnertime.
"We really need Bruce back," Clint sighed.
"He makes good food," Tony agreed.
"We'll just start eating it again when he gets back," Natasha added.
She was right. Breakfast just wasn't the same without Bruce- if he was cooking the food or not.