Chapter 6
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It has been about four days since the mission, since Steve took a shot for him and things are alright for the most part. Steve is already healed up mostly, only a little mark to show for the shot and that may be gone soon enough. Clint has run fingers and lips over it just like Steve does with some of his scars and Steve seems to like that. The cap bear sits on Steve’s dresser just like it did Natasha’s for a few weeks and Natasha was true to her word and hasn’t yelled at Steve though they did have some sort of talk. Clint doesn’t know what was said, that is between them, but he thinks it went all right for the most part and he is glad that they talked. There is just a bit of distance between them and Clint isn’t going to push them towards each other, not yet, but he does want them to get along, be friends if nothing else. It is something to think about later, right now he focuses on finishing up what he is doing at SHIELD so he can head home. He almost makes it out but Fury catches him in the hallway.
“Barton, we need to talk before you head out. Follow me.”
There is a tone in Fury’s voice that tells Clint he isn’t going to get out of this so he just sort of sighs and follows him to his office. He goes through what could possibly be the topic for the day and he is coming up a bit blank. All of his psych appointments have been attended, he hasn’t gotten into any fights, been keeping his distance from any agents that might cause a problem, and the few missions he has been on lately have gone ok so he can’t think of what Fury wants to yell at him for this time. So he just sits down across from him and waits to see what he is going to say.
“So you and Rogers are a thing now.’
Fury doesn’t say it like a question, just states it like a fact and this isn’t really what Clint thought they would be talking about.
“Are we really going to discuss my love life, sir? Can we talk about yours instead?”
He asks and Fury gives him a bit of a glare. It is always a bit of a touchy subject since his divorce years ago but Clint figures it might distract him from this but Fury just shakes his head.
“Nothing to talk about on that front currently so I think we should stick with the topic at hand. You and Rogers, he took a shot for you and then you two made out in the hospital after, there were some confusions, lots of talk about that.”
“For the record, we didn’t make out, it was a couple kisses at most.”
Clint says this, feels like it is important to stress that detail for some reason. Fury just keeps a steady look at Clint and keeps talking.
“Don’t need all the details, just wanted to touch base with you on it, talk about professionalism. We have had this talk before but I figured a reminder wouldn’t be bad.”
The last time they had this talk was a few months after Clint brought Natasha in. Their relationship hadn’t even turned physical yet at that point but Fury had still sat them both down and talked about how they could do what they want but that they both still had jobs to do. It had been a somewhat awkward talk and Clint isn’t sure if Fury has it with every shield agent that does something with another or if he is just special because they have known each other for so long. Right now he just gives a nod.
“I know to keep things professional out in the field. You going to talk with him too?”
Fury tilts his head just a bit right now, thinks for a moment before answering.
“Haven’t decided yet. Do I need to?”
He says this and Clint thinks about it for just a moment before shrugging.
“Up to you. Steve knows how to be discreet.”
“I’ll take your word on that for now. Things must be going well, you got him a gift and everything. Didn’t think of Rogers as the stuffed animal type.”
There is just a slight smirk on Fury’s face right now and Clint just shakes his head a bit.
“You really need a new hobby besides watching feeds from medical.”
“What can I say? It is better than what is on cable most of the time and I need to know what is going on. You and Romanoff still good?”
He asks now and Clint just gives a little nod.
“We’re good, we’re fine. Can I start asking you about your relationships now?”
“Afraid we are out of time, got a meeting in five but I can walk you out.”
There may or may not be a meeting but Clint will let Fury have his out.
“Alright, we can talk about you next time. Do I get to at least know what your meeting is about ?“
This is what Clint says as he gets up and Fury tell him that is classified as they leave the office. The short walk to the door is filled with Clint’s guess of what the meeting could be and Fury not really denying or confirming anything and soon enough Clint gets ready to leave the building for real this time when Fury says one more thing.
“I just want you to know that what you do off the clock is your business and if it is working for you, good for you ,but try to keep things professional when you can. People are always looking for others to screw up. ”
It is a warning and Clint knows that there are a few people who are looking for him to screw up, have been waiting for it, and they had pounced a bit after New York but have been kept at bay, Fury keeping them at bay.
“They always have been. You have my back, Sir?”
He asks this but he knows that Fury does. They don’t always see eye to eye and Fury doesn’t always tell him everything but Clint does trust him for the most part. He offered him a chance when most wouldn’t and Clint will always owe him for that.
“I do. Don’t do anything stupid that might make me want to change my mind.”
Fury says this and Clint just makes his face look as innocent as he can as he speaks.
“ When have I ever done anything stupid?”
“We don’t have time to go over the list. I have to get to my meeting but maybe next time if you have some free hours. “
Fury says this deadpan but there is just a little twinkle in his eye and Clint just makes a scoffing sound before telling him he will see him around. Fury leaves and Clint gets out of the building and heads home, tells himself that he will need to give Steve a heads up about a possible talk with Fury later.
A few more days pass, Clint gets a mission with just Nat and it feels like old times. They end up at one of their safe houses after , eating random assortment of canned food for dinner, and playing some cards. Their pick up will be in the morning and for now they just have to lay low and this is familiar, the old wind down from the mission, the being safe but not home yet, and neither of them picked up too many injuries though Clint has a cut on his forehead that Nat insisted on bandaging and she teases him about as they get ready to start a new game of cards.
“Is your boyfriend going to yell at me for bringing you back to him damaged?”
“Hey, I’m not damaged, it will heal up in a few days. Considering his last mission with me he got shot, he can’t really complain. Want to play slap jack this time?”
She says yes and then they start the game, quiet settling in for a bit more before Tasha breaks it with some words as Clint smacks the cards and takes the pile.
“You know, I had a talk with Fury the other day.”
“This one about something in particular?”
He asks now, knows that is what she is wanting.
“Yep, it was about you, about your dating and how that might be affecting me. Not exactly my favorite topic of conversation but one Fury felt was needed.”
There is irritation in her voice but Clint really knows that the irritation is just slight and he gives her a quick smile as he misses the cards this time as she gets to them first.
“It is how he shows he cares and also I think he may need more hobbies so he doesn’t watch the hospital feeds so much. “
Natshsha gives a little shrug and places her first card down.
“We could try to get him one. He could collect something but I’m not sure what. Knives maybe? ”
Clint lays down a card and shakes his head.
“I don’t think collecting would work, he needs something to do with his hands and his time. Maybe knitting? You could maybe even get some more blankets out of the deal. “
Natasha leans forward a bit more as she throws her card down, eyes furrowed just a bit.
“That could work, it would be productive and he would have something to show for it. Do you think he would like needle point?”
They spend a good hour discussing the various merits of different hobbies for Fury before they decide to put the cards away and get some rest. They soon enough are in the bed and Clint isn’t wearing a shirt, just some sleep pants and the scar is visible and Natasha fingers move close to it as she settles down close to him and Clint tenses up, squirms just a bit.
“Still having trouble with that.”
Natasha says this and it isn’t a question but Clint still gives an answer.
“ A bit but Steve has plan that might help with it, just have to wait and see.”
He says this and she just gives a little nod, doesn’t really ask much about, just lays close to him. It doesn’t take too long for them to fall asleep. Nat takes most of the covers but Clint doesn’t wake up too cold and they decide to send Fury some knitting magazines later, just in case he does need a hobby. It is just a day after Clint comes back from that mission that he decides that it was a good call to discuss getting Fury a hobby because Steve shows up at Clint’s place and the first words out of his mouth are about his own meeting with Fury.
“You know, I really didn’t think I would have to discuss personal affairs with Fury, he didn’t seem the type but I guess I was wrong. He gave me a speech about professionalism and also a couple threats. He do this a lot?”
“Mostly when he is bored. Nat and I think he needs a hobby. Any suggestions?”
Steve just shakes his head but that is ok cause they already came up with a few that might work. For now, Clint just gives Steve a kiss and enjoys a day with his boyfriend.
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Clint is stretched out on the bed, pillow under his head, not wearing very much at all and it is a position he has been in before but not for this reason. Usually he would be either getting ready for sleep or for something a bit more fun but today he is going to play human canvases finally and he thinks he may not be the only one a little bit nervous about it if the way Steve is looking at him is any indication.
“This is going to take a little while, may tickle a bit. Let me know if you need me to stop and I will try not to mess up.”
Steve says all of this while looking Clint straight in the eye, expression just a little serious but Clint gives him a little smile.
“I trust you, I’ll try not to move.”
“That is probably a good idea, otherwise it may not end up looking that great.”
Steve says this simply and then picks up the first marker, places it gently on Clint’s skin and starts to draw. It feels strange, not quite bad but strange, different that the sting of the blade but he can still the pressure of the marker on his skin and it is making him tense up just a bit. He needs to calm down and so he asks Steve something.
“Can you talk while you do this? It doesn’t matter about what, just anything, drawing or something.”
Clint says this now and soon enough Steve’s voice fills the room.
“I used to take drawing classes you know, any ones I could find. Bucky would go with me though he didn’t really draw half the time, just watched me and made comments about things. Said it was interesting seeing me create something, making art. I couldn’t really understand watching someone else make something pretty back then but I did understand eventually.”
Steve has kept with the strokes of his marker and he stops for just a moment now, switches colors and then goes back to talking.
“After I got the serum, I was sent on tour, on the war bond tour. It wasn’t really something I enjoyed but I thought it was the only option I had besides being a lab rat. Felt like a dancing monkey most of the time. ”
There is a bit of regret and something that sounds like embarrassment and Clint tries to lighten the mood a bit.
“Hey, I have seen the old footage, at least you looked great in tight pants.”
“Looked?”
Steve asks with just a hint of teasing in his voice and Clint gives a smile, feels a bit more relaxed now.
“You still look great in tight pants, don’t worry. You were saying something about the tour?”
Clint asks and Steve keeps drawing as he starts speaking again.
“On the tour, there were a lot of dancers and we would have to get ready together. I would see them do their hair and make up and I started to understand why Bucky would like to watch me draw. “
The strokes of the marker are still gliding on his skin and it is tempting to look but Clint doesn’t yet, just lays there and listens as Steve talks about watching the girls do their makeup.
“I used to always see girls done up, hair perfectly curled, lips red and eyes lined and I always thought how nice they would look but it was something else to see them do it, to watch as they made themselves up. They were pretty anyway but they would make themselves more so and it was like art. I liked watching them get ready but I enjoyed watching Peggy get ready even more.”
Steve stops and switches markers again, starts telling Clint about some of watching Peggy do her make up and Clint thinks if he closes his eyes, he might be able to see just what Steve is describing.
“She wouldn’t be able to take as much time as the girls did for the show but she was still so precise, so well practiced at it. She would close one eye as she swept the pencil along it, so close to her lashes I was surprised that she didn’t’ poke herself in the eye. I actually tried it once to see how hard it was and did poke myself in the eye, cursed quite a bit when I did.”
Clint lets out a little laugh at the image of Steve trying to line his eye and poking it instead and he looks at Steve for just a moment to see a smile on his face.
“That is about how Bucky reacted too, laughed and told me that I should probably stick to drawing on paper and not on my face. Peggy just told me if I really wanted to try it to let her do it for me sometime.”
There is fondness in his voice, fondness and something that almost sounds like longing and Clint has heard it before when Steve has spoken about them.
“You loved them a lot, didn’t you?”
“I still love them but it doesn’t change the fact I love you too.”
Steve says this and Clint gives a small smile.
“I know.”
He does know that you can be in love with more than one person, is himself and he isn’t going to judge Steve for it. Steve gives a little smile and keeps drawing on Clint.
“I have told Peggy about you, just so you know.”
He says this and Clint tries to sound casual when he speaks.
“Good things I hope.”
“Yep, when she has her good days, she wants to meet you.”
Clint has heard about Peggy’s good days, has heard Steve speak about them, and knows he gets quiet when it was a bad day but he still visits. She is a part of his past that is still here and Clint knows that it means a lot for him to see her, to still have her even if it isn’t like he used to, and it would be exciting to meet her but Clint is a little nervous about it.
“I would like to. She know who I am?”
He asks now and Steve gives a nod.
“Yep, told her we work together, told her your name, she knows a lot about you already on her good days, didn’t tell her about your purple costume from the circus though I have been tempted to show her and anyone I meet those. “
Clint is still not entirely happy with himself for showing Steve old circus pics and letting him take a pic of one on his phone for a background but he will worry about that later. Right now he will ask the question he really wants answered.
“I mean, does she know who I am to you?”
It is important that Clint knows if Steve has just called him a friend or if Peggy knows that they are a thing. Steve looks at him for just a moment before answering.
“I told her you’re my sweetheart if that is what you’re asking.”
Clint grins even as he teases just a bit.
“Sweetheart? What are you like 90 something?”
Steve looks him straight in the eyes and replies with the most honest expression.
“Technically, yes. Now hold still so I can finish this.”
Clint just gives a little laugh and nod and does as he is told. There are a few more moments of quiet and then Steve is putting the markers away.
“You can look at it now if you want. I think it turned out all right but if you don’t like it will go away in a few days.”
Steve says this, shifts so that Clint can moves from the bed now. He does, gets up and goes to the bathroom so he can use the mirror. There is a sense of nervousness but also excitement and he looks at the scar now, at the red and orange that is over it, flames dancing along the curve of it. It is an interesting design, flame along his hip and it makes him think of the heat of Steve’s fingers against his skin instead of the chill of Loki’s like he usually does when he sees that scar. He moves his fingers to it now, has them just above it, almost ready to touch when Steve’s voice stops him.
“It might not be dry yet, you should wait a bit. What do you think?”
Steve steps into the bathroom now, steps close to Clint. He looks just a bit nervous, something shy in the smile he is giving Clint right now and it warms Clint just a bit.
“Not sure if I would want it there forever but it looks good. Thank you.”
He gives Steve a kiss with those words and he means them. It is nice that Steve wants to help him with this and Clint thinks it is a good start. Later on that night, Steve’s fingers go near it and Clint tenses up less than before, gives Steve a little nod and Steve is able to place a finger softly on the scar, runs it over the flames for just a moment before he has to shift away but it is progress and Clint will take it.
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