Chapter 13
The next day, I had nothing scheduled until midday, so I decided to visit Shadow. Happily, I made my way to the stables, eager to see my stallion. After wandering around for a while and failing to find him, I asked a stable hand about the new stallion’s whereabouts. He told me that Master Renfield had taken him to the far stables for some final lessons.
A sudden unease settled in my stomach, and I quickly made my way toward the far stables. When I arrived, the place seemed almost deserted, but faint shouts and strange sounds echoed from the far end.
As I got closer, Master Renfield’s voice rang through the stable.
“You stinking beast, for once in your life, I’m going to teach you a lesson you’ll never forget. I’m actually glad to be rid of you—I can’t wait for that stuck-up princess to break her neck trying to ride you. Who the hell does she think she is? As if she could tame or even handle you when you wouldn’t even listen to me?”
I heard Shadow snort nervously and pace in his stall. As I stepped forward, I saw Master Renfield raise a riding whip. Before I could react, there was a sharp crack, followed by a terrified cry—an unmistakable sound of an animal in pain.
Rage surged through me, and I sprinted toward the back of the stables. Master Renfield stood there, a sick smile twisting his face.
I couldn’t stop myself—I screamed at him. “Who the hell do you think you are? This is my horse! How dare you hurt him?”
Renfield spun around, startled. But when he saw it was just me, his hateful expression returned.
“Princess,” he sneered, “you wouldn’t understand. This is part of breaking a horse. He needs to submit before he’ll ever be ready to ride. If you let me finish, I’ll make sure you have the perfect mount.”
I could hear the contempt in his voice, and it only fueled my fury.
“I don’t think I made myself clear,” I seethed. “If you’re not out of this stable in the next few seconds, I’ll make sure you’re buried so deep in the dungeons of Asgard that you’ll never see the light of day again!”
Renfield’s face twisted with anger. He raised his whip—this time, aiming at me.
Before he could strike, Shadow lunged forward. With terrifying speed, the stallion sank his teeth into the crook of Renfield’s neck. The man screamed in agony, clawing at the horse’s face. Then, from somewhere beneath his tunic, he pulled a knife—and plunged it into Shadow’s neck.
Shadow let out a shrill cry of pain, releasing Renfield. Panic overtook the stallion, and in his terror, he shattered the rope holding him in place. I felt both his fear and Renfield’s—because the only way out of the stable was through its tormentor.
With a final, desperate act of self-preservation, Shadow reared and charged forward. Wood splintered and crashed as the stallion burst through the stall, trampling Renfield beneath the wreckage.
Bloodied shards of wood scattered across the stone floor. Renfield’s body lay eerily still.
For a moment, I was frozen in shock. Then, as reality slammed into me, I turned and ran outside.
In the distance, I spotted Shadow fleeing, leaving behind a dark trail of blood.
Panic seized me, but I forced myself to move. I sprinted after him, ignoring the stable hands rushing toward the commotion. “Master Renfield is injured! Get a healer!” I shouted as I ran past them, following Shadow’s path.
He had bolted toward the fields, but by the time I rounded the stable buildings, he was already a distant figure. My heart ached—he was terrified and wounded, and there was no way I could reach him.
The sound of hooves against stone made me turn. Muriel rode toward me.
I ran to him, gasping for breath. “Muriel—my horse—he’s wounded. He took off over the fields.” I pointed toward the last place I had seen Shadow. “Please, help me find him.”
Tears streaked my face as the terror of what had happened finally hit me.
Muriel studied me, then turned his gaze to the horizon. Before I could beg again, he extended a hand. I grabbed it, and in one swift motion, he pulled me up onto his horse, seating me in front of him.
I threw my arms around his waist, clinging to him as he spurred his horse into action.
We followed Shadow’s trail—crushed fences and splintered gates marking his frantic escape. Every time we came upon a broken gate, I held my breath, terrified Muriel’s horse might injure itself on the jagged wood.
Soon, the landscape changed, and Shadow’s trail became harder to track. But Muriel showed no hesitation.
The sound beneath us shifted—hooves striking rock instead of grass. Looking up, I spotted Shadow standing on a rocky outcrop near the shore.
Before Muriel had fully stopped his horse, I was already on the ground, running toward Shadow.
“Be careful!” Muriel called. “A frightened horse can be dangerous!”
I barely heard him. My only focus was the suffering animal before me.
As I approached, I spoke softly. “Shadow… it’s okay. I’m here.”
His ears flicked at the sound of my voice. His eyes, wild with fear, focused on me, and he let out a deep snort of recognition. His whole body trembled.
Closing the last bit of distance, I wrapped my arms around his neck, stroking him gently. His pain washed over me, and I started to cry.
His trembling worsened. Blood streaked his legs, but the knife wound in his neck was far worse. The running had only aggravated it—blood poured from the gash.
With a final, exhausted shudder, Shadow collapsed.
He screamed in pain but twisted his body to avoid falling on top of me. As he hit the ground, I dropped beside him, whispering soothing words as I held his head in my lap.
I looked at Muriel, desperate. “What do I do?” My voice shook, thick with tears.
Muriel crouched beside me, inspecting Shadow’s wound. A deep sigh escaped him.
“I’m sorry, Aurora,” he said softly. “There’s nothing we can do.”
Tears blurred my vision. “What do you mean, nothing? I have magic—you have magic! We must be able to heal him, right?”
A tingling sensation pricked the back of my neck. Loki was speaking to me through our bond, but I couldn’t focus and his voice was just to much. So I shut him out, my entire being fixated on Muriel’s words.
Muriel ran a gentle hand along Shadow’s heaving side. “Aurora… healing magic works differently on animals. It speeds up the natural healing process, but animals don’t have the same regenerative abilities as Æsir or elves. Even if we tried, it wouldn’t be enough. The wound is too deep—he’s losing too much blood.” His voice was thick with emotion. “He’s dying, Aurora. The humane thing to do is end his suffering.”
I just stared at Muriel in horror as he pulled a large blade from his boot. I blinked a few times, trying to process what he had just said. Anger surged inside me, burning so hot it felt like I might burst.
“I will not accept that,” I said coldly. “Don’t you dare harm him.”
Muriel looked at me, sadness still clear in his eyes. But he lowered his knife slightly, hesitating. I could see he wanted to say something, but I interrupted him before he could.
“I’m not going to let this magnificent animal die without trying,” I shouted, as if that alone would explain everything. I moved closer to Shadow’s side and gently patted his neck, trying to offer comfort.
Muriel’s hands gripped my shoulders, trying to pull me back, and I snapped. I shoved him hard. He nearly toppled backward, clearly not expecting me to fight back.
“If you disturb me while I’m trying to save him, you’ll be sorry,” I said in a low, icy voice.
Again, that furious tingle burned in my neck, but before I could hear whatever Loki had to say, I slammed the lock on our connection. I needed to focus—I couldn’t afford any distractions. I’d explain everything to him later.
Muriel raised his hands in surrender and took a step back, giving me space.
I turned my full attention to Shadow, making soft, soothing sounds. His breathing was growing shallow, his heartbeat erratic. I placed my hands over the deep wound on his neck, still bleeding heavily. Shadow whimpered in pain, and as I pressed down to stop the bleeding, a white-hot wave of agony shot through me. The pain was unbearable—I screamed.
From the corner of my eye, I saw Muriel rush forward. I immediately raised a hand to stop him.
“You may hold me upright, but I swear, if you try to pull me away, I will hurt you,” I warned, not even looking at him.
His hands rested on my shoulders again, this time steadying me. The pain coursing through Shadow’s body was now flowing through mine, making it nearly impossible to stay focused, let alone sit upright. I pushed all my emotions—fear, terror, exhaustion—to the back of my mind. My only focus was Shadow’s wound.
I reached for the warm energy of my seiðr , deep within my chest. I pulled on it, stirring it to life, guiding it through my body as Loki had thaught me—from my core to my chest, down my arms, and into my hands. As the power surged through me, I concentrated on healing, repairing the damage beneath my fingers.
It was just like when I had accidentally read the titles of the books in the library. I blocked out everything but this one purpose: healing.
My magic poured into Shadow, linking us. The world around me faded. There was only him and me.
I don’t know how long I sat there, pouring every bit of my strength into him, but gradually, the pain shifted. It started to lessen. One by one, other sensations trickled back in—the weight of Muriel’s hands steadying me, the rhythm of Shadow’s breathing, his heartbeat stabilizing.
But as Shadow grew stronger, my body grew weaker. I forced the exhaustion aside and pushed more magic into him. Beneath my hands, I felt his muscles knit back together. His wound closed, skin and hair weaving seamlessly back into place.
I scanned his body with my magic, searching for more injuries. His legs were badly scraped and bloody. Several muscles were sprained. Tiny cuts and splinters covered him. I focused harder, pouring every last drop of power I had into him.
Then, suddenly—nothing. No more pain. No more wounds.
I took a deep, shaky breath and pulled my hands away.
At that moment, everything I had pushed aside came crashing back. Muriel’s presence. My exhaustion. My pain. The sound of waves crashing on the shore.
Somewhere in the distance, I swore I heard the pounding of hooves and someone shouting my name. I looked up, my vision swimming, and saw Loki racing toward me. His mouth was moving, but no sound reached me.
The world had gone completely, utterly silent.
I looked down at my hands, drenched in blood. My dress was stained deep red. I felt Muriel shift, his hands leaving my shoulders as he moved in front of me. His lips moved, forming words I couldn’t hear.
I blinked—then, a massive wave of vertigo slammed into me.
The world tilted.
I must have collapsed.
Muriel’s arms caught me, the only thing keeping me from cracking my skull on the stone floor. Through my blurred vision, I saw Loki kneel beside me, his lips moving soundlessly. I tried to respond, to say anything—but I wasn’t in control of my body anymore.
A second wave of vertigo hit.
I surrendered to the darkness.
Somewhere in the void, I heard voices. Muffled, distant.
Loki’s voice. Muriel’s. Others.
They were worried—terrified, even. I wanted to see what was wrong, to reassure them, but I was just too tired.
Loki and Muriel were arguing. Then, suddenly, they were interrupted. The soft, commanding tone could only belong to Frigga.
Silence followed.
Some time later, I felt warmth—fingers tracing gentle patterns over my hand. A voice, soft and strained, murmuring over and over like a mantra.
“Please wake up. I cannot do this again.”
Loki.
His voice was raw, filled with an agony that nearly shattered my heart. I wanted to reach for him, to tell him everything would be okay.
But darkness claimed me again.
The next time I surfaced, I was more aware.
Sounds had gaps, like moments missing from time. I fought to clear my mind, to force my eyes open. When I finally managed it, Loki was still there.
He was silent now, still tracing those same little patterns on my skin. His forehead rested against the bed, his body slightly rocking.
My throat was painfully dry. I tried to speak but couldn’t. Then, I remembered—I had locked him out of our bond.
I focused and released the block.
Loki was so lost in thought, he didn’t notice at first.
I gathered what little strength I had left and sent him a single, simple message:
“Hi.”
The shock that ran through him was almost violent. He jolted upright, as if struck, his eyes locking onto mine. A tidal wave of relief crashed over him.
For a long moment, we just stared. Then, his voice broke the silence, thick with emotion.
“There you are.”
A weak smile crossed his face.
But then—anger.
My eyes widened in alarm.
Immediately, he softened. “I’m sorry. I’m angry about seeing you like this, but don’t let it scare you,” he assured me. “I just spent the last four days at your side, terrified that I might lose you again. The last time you lay like this, I had to wait over two years for you to wake.”
I blinked as his words sank in.
“Aurora, are you in pain?” he asked gently, taking my hand.
I shook my head.
He closed his eyes for a moment, relief flooding through him.
“But you feel exhausted?”
I nodded.
I tried to speak, but only a soft, dry rasp escaped. Loki was beside me in an instant, carefully lifting me into a sitting position, my body leaning against his chest for support.
“You need something to drink,” he murmured.
I nodded again.
A tingle of magic, and a glass of water with a straw appeared. He held it steady, guiding it to my lips. I took a small sip, the cool liquid soothing my parched throat. I swallowed, then eagerly took another sip.
Loki pulled the glass away. “Not too much. Your body has been through a lot. You need to take it easy.”
I rested my head against his chest.
For the first time in days, I finally felt safe.
“Shadow?” I asked, looking up at Loki’s face.
A small smile formed on his lips, though it didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Shadow is fine. You saved his life, and he is in the stables. I personally selected a stable hand to care for him. He is the only one allowed near him.”
Relief washed over me, and I nodded, glad Shadow was safe.
But Loki’s worry caught my attention just as I was about to drift off again. “What’s wrong?” I managed to ask, forcing my eyes open.
“Aurora, I was in a meeting with my father when I was suddenly overwhelmed with intense stress and pain. It took me a moment to comprehend that they were your emotions I was feeling. I searched for you everywhere. When I finally reached the stables, I saw the chaos. Master Renfield was in a state, and I was certain you had been gravely injured. I tried to contact you several times. Not only did you not respond—you completely shut me out. I could not reach you, but the pain remained. It drove me mad with worry. And then, when I finally found you and Muriel… you collapsed.”
I felt something warm touch my cheek and realized tears were falling from Loki’s eyes onto me. Reaching up, I brushed them away gently.
“Not my pain,” I whispered, my voice hoarse. “Shadow’s. Empath.”
Understanding dawned on Loki’s face. He let out a deep breath, but his expression darkened. “I never knew you could feel emotions to that degree.” He exhaled sharply, as if trying to steady himself. “If you were in so much pain, why follow him in the first place? He is a beast that went wild, Aurora. He hurt Master Renfield. You are lucky he did not hurt you, too. I never should have bought him for you.”
I tried to meet Loki’s gaze, but he had closed his eyes, shaking his head in regret. Anger burned in my chest, and before I could stop them, tears welled in my own eyes.
“Shadow’s innocent,” I choked out, my throat tightening. “Master Renfield was hurting him with a whip. I stepped between them, and he tried to hit me instead. Shadow bit him before he could, and Renfield stabbed him. Shadow panicked and crashed through the stable, taking Renfield with him. He’s innocent.”
I saw comprehension dawn in Loki’s eyes, quickly replaced by fury. “That horrible, lying bilgesnipe.” The darkness within him bubbled to the surface.
I knew I had to pull his focus away before he did something reckless. “Why am I so weak?” I asked, redirecting his attention.
Loki immediately refocused on me. He sighed but answered my question. “Do you remember the lessons about using too much magic at once? And that time you accidentally translated the book in the library and nearly passed out?”
A lightbulb went off in my head. “Oh,” I muttered, nodding.
“It is a wonder you managed to heal Shadow at all, let alone to the extent that you did. Especially considering how much pain you were in.” He hesitated, and I could feel him holding something back.
“What is it?” I pressed. “Please don’t hold back. We can be honest with each other, right?”
Loki hesitated for a moment before exhaling. “Aurora, I know you well enough to understand that I could never stop you from trying to save something you care about—even when it puts you in grave danger.” He paused, choosing his words carefully. “But please, never block our link again when you are in danger. I nearly lost my mind when it went dark. At first, I thought you had died until I realized I could still feel the pain. But I had no way to reach you, no way to find you. I was left with nothing but your suffering, and it was unbearable. I searched everywhere. Fortunately, a stable hand saw you leave with Muriel and pointed me in the right direction.”
He was holding back, but I didn’t need to hear more—I could feel the raw emotion radiating from him. The sheer terror I’d caused him by shutting him out.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, tears slipping down my cheeks. And I meant it. Not for healing Shadow, but for blocking Loki in the way that I had. I hadn’t just hurt myself—I’d put him through hell.
Loki pulled me into his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around me. I sank against his chest, letting my emotions spill out as he held me. His head rested against mine, his grip firm, as if afraid I’d slip away again.
We stayed like that for a long time, until the storm of emotions settled.
Then, out of nowhere, he murmured, “I think it is a side effect of the spell.”
I blinked up at him, confused. “What?”
“The pain,” he clarified. “I felt your pain, even without an active connection. By all accounts, I should not have been able to. But somehow, I did.” He frowned, as if working through the realization in real time. “Maybe it is because of the guardian spell. Maybe that is why it alerted me when you were in danger. I knew something was wrong. And I had this… irresistible urge to find you.” His voice dropped. “Not being able to was unbearable.”
I felt so guilty that tears began to pool in my eyes, and my lower lip started to wobble. But I did my best not to cry.
“I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable,” Loki quickly added. “Perhaps it is best if we remove the bond altogether.”
I shifted in his lap, wrapping my arms around his neck and burying my head in the crook of his shoulder. Using our bond, I let him feel the sincerity of what I was about to say.
“I’m sorry, Loki. I really am. I’m sorry you felt Shadow’s pain through me. I’m even more sorry that I scared you this badly. I’ll do my best to never, ever put you through something like that again. I totally get that you don’t want to be bonded with me anymore.”
Despite my efforts, I was actively crying now. “I’m so, so, so sorry!” I sobbed.
A wave of realization surged through our bond.
“No, no, you have misunderstood,” he replied, his emotions wrapping around me in an attempt to comfort. “I was not suggesting that I wished to end our bond. I believed you wanted to, as I could feel how uncomfortable it was making you.”
“You dumb-dumb!” I exclaimed. “I was uncomfortable because I put you through all that and hurt you, not because I don’t want to be bonded with you. Knowing you can feel it when I’m in trouble actually makes me feel safe.”
I blushed as I admitted it, but I didn’t care. The thought that he believed I was uncomfortable with him and our bond hurt me. I felt his arms tighten around me, pulling me closer, and suddenly, it dawned on me—this, right here in his embrace, was the safest I’d ever felt. He could feel it too, and the realization calmed him.
As he relaxed, his grip eased, allowing me to rest against his chest again.
“Let us not overuse the bond,” he murmured against the top of my head. “You are still weak, and it will take a few days before I am comfortable with you using magic again—including our bond. You nearly drained yourself completely, which can be lethal. However…” He hesitated before continuing, “I felt it as well. Holding you now in my arms is the best remedy for what happened. It must be a guardian instinct—knowing you are safe in my arms calms me unlike anything else. And no, I do not wish to end our bond. The idea of not knowing when you are in danger is far worse than what happened today. This way, at least I may help you when needed. But always remember, you have the option to remove our bond if you so wish.”
He sighed deeply, reluctance seeping through our connection. “I truly should let you go now. I promised Mother and Lady Eir that I would inform them as soon as you awoke.”
I groaned softly, making Loki chuckle.
“I shall ensure they understand you require rest. However, they are immensely worried,” he admitted. Then, after a pause, he added, “Prince Muriel is also deeply concerned. He has been in and out over the last few days, asking many questions about you and what transpired. I told him it was not my place to explain. We had something of a disagreement on the matter, and my mother ended up expelling us both from the room.” He chuckled. “Shall I inform him that you are awake?”
I nodded. “Please. I’m really tired, though. Can you make sure they don’t all come at once? Right now, I just want to feel safe and sleep.”
Loki gave me a reassuring squeeze. “I give you my word. I shall inform them and ensure they do not overwhelm or wake you.”
I looked up at him. “While it’d make me feel a whole lot better knowing you’re here, I know this wasn’t easy for you either. If you’d rather be somewhere else to relax, that’s okay too. I don’t want to burden you more than I already have.”
Loki responded by pressing a soft kiss to my forehead. “I believe it is safer if I remain here. If I have too much free time, I may act upon certain emotions and hunt down Master Renfield.”
I nodded, my mood darkening at the mention of that lying weasel of a man.
“Putting it that way, it’s probably best you stay,” I agreed. “Because as soon as I feel better, you might have to hold me back from visiting him. There’s going to be some kind of action taken against him, right? For what he did to poor Shadow? He was hitting him for no reason, shouting about how he hoped I’d break my neck riding him. When I confronted him, he said it was part of the process of breaking a horse. That can’t be right, can it?”
I was getting worked up all over again, but Loki shushed me.
“Calm yourself. I shall ensure he is punished,” he assured me. “He remains in the healing ward, but I will assign guards to watch over him. I shall inform my father of what has occurred, and we will see to it that he faces justice. You must simply focus on resting.”
With that, he gently lifted me from his lap and tucked me back into bed. I was so exhausted I barely had the energy to nod before closing my eyes. Before Loki even left the room, I was fast asleep.
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When I woke again, it was much later in the day. Loki sat beside my bed, reading a book, and next to him, Frigga was doing the same.
I shifted slightly, and Frigga looked up with a warm smile.
“My dear, there you are. How do you feel?” She set her book aside and moved to sit on the edge of my bed, taking my hand.
I adjusted my pillow so I could sit up more as I gathered my thoughts. “To be honest, I feel a lot better. I’m still tired, but I don’t feel like I have to fight to keep my eyes open.”
“I am most relieved to hear that. And very glad to see you awake again,” she said gently. “I gave Loki my word that I would not tire you, but I do need to discuss something with you, if you do not mind.”
I nodded.
“As you are aware, Prince Muriel has been asking questions. He knows something is different about you after what he witnessed. Given his position as an ambassador and prince of Alfheim, he is someone we must not alienate if possible. Loki believes we should tell him nothing, but I fear that may worsen the situation. He was most distressed over you.”
I heard Loki huff, but Frigga ignored it.
“As was my own son,” she added, glancing at Loki.
I thought I saw the faintest blush creeping up his neck, but I focused back on Frigga’s words. She raised a finger, signaling me to wait, then murmured softly while making a few motions with her hand.
“I have shielded this room from intrusions. We may speak freely now. So, Aurora, what do you think?”
I took a moment to consider before answering. “I think we should tell him some version of the truth,” I said finally. “I’ve got a feeling he’ll understand if we at least give him more than what’s common knowledge. Maybe we can explain that my Seiðr is different, and we don’t know why? That it’s part of the reason you and Odin offered to take me in and why Loki is my teacher? I don’t think it’s smart to tell him the full truth about my origins. I don’t want to put you and Odin in a tough spot by veering from the story of my heritage. Depending on how the conversation goes and if he’s satisfied or not, I could tell him about my empathic abilities. What do you think? I’d love both your opinions on what I should do.”
I looked between Loki and Frigga, waiting for their thoughts.
Frigga nodded. “I believe your plan is wise. You shall provide him with sufficient information to answer his questions. I agree that it is best not to allow anyone to challenge Odin’s story or to involve Fenrir. However, I do have concerns regarding your empathic abilities. I do not know how close the two of you are, but revealing such a thing may jeopardize your friendship. Though I do not know the prince personally, and thus cannot judge his character, I cannot predict whether this will pose a problem for him. Therefore, I believe it would be wise for you to make that decision in the moment. I simply hope it shall not cost you a friend.”
I glanced over at Loki, wanting his take on it. He lowered his book, his expression troubled.
“The Muriel I once knew would have kept your secrets safe and would not have cared about your abilities. However, you know that I no longer know Muriel as well as I once did. I see that he has made every effort to be your friend, yet I cannot help but feel there is an ulterior motive behind it. What that may be, I cannot say. I believe your plan is sound, so long as you do not reveal anything about Fenrir or the fact that you are not truly of royal blood. If that truth were ever exposed, it would not only be disastrous for our family but would also place you in grave danger.”
I was relieved that we all agreed on a plan. Frigga waved her hand, and I felt the magic shield dissipate.