Chapter 32
The GPS led them to a small mostly deserted village. It only held a few older, wary looking citizens who scolded as they passed. Peter couldn't find himself to care. He was stuck to Wade's side.
The Merc was hunched over. Each breath he took was a wheeze and sat quiet most of the ride. It was unnerving for all of them.
Steve had noticed his healing factor wasn't working either. He had a few bruises that only seemed to go darker. Bucky had was by his side too. Asking about internal injuries and possible fractures. He kept a hand on Steve's shoulder the whole time. The fear was palpable in his eyes.
But it was nothing like Peter's. Every time Wade coughed or groaned or heaved Peter's face drained, distorting with horror. He had tried to hold the man in an attempt at comfort but Wade shouted in pain. His skin wasn't healing. His sores were growing and bleeding and they hurt so damn much.
What kind of boyfriend was he? If he couldn't even hold Wade's hand in a time of need?
"We're going to ask around for Kurt. You guys need anything," Clint asked as everyone but Peter and Wade climbed out of the Van.
"A healin factor would be nice," Wade attempted to joke, coughing until he could barely breath.
Clint gave him a tight lipped grin, "I'll see what they got."
They left. For a while Peter stared out at the trees and dirt roads. He had a billion different things going on in his head and not one sat still long enough for him to make sense of it.
"Baby boy."
He blinked, turning to Wade who was slumped against the side of the van. Red stained lips tilted up in a smirk. "You look constipated."
Peter just kept staring at him. Watching how the sores that usually shifted and healed only grew more irritated. The Merc frowned going to pull his mask down. Peter stopped him, eyes going cold. "Don't. You'll make them worse."
"They're bad no matter what Pete. You don't have to see them."
"Wade." The older man looked to him. He sounded so tired, he looked tired. All stress lines and watery eyes. Wade hated it.
"Come on now Webs. Don't look like that. I'm on my death bed, death van? Can't you crack a joke or something? Maybe a little somethin extra," he sagged hairless brows.
Peter's lips quivered and before Wade could say anything else the hero had him in his arms. It hurt. But Wade melted against him anyways taking in the smell of sweat, spandex, and stale laundry soap. It was a very Peter smell. Something Wade could point out blindfolded. It made him wonder how the he'll he didn't put together his secret identity sooner.
Peter muttered into his shoulder. "What," Wade asked pulling him closer.
"I love you."
He froze. Those words rang in his ears.
He had wanted to tell him the same thing for a while. It always sat at the top of his tongue but with the way his life was he never admit to it. And hearing them now was somewhat bitter sweet.
"I love you so much Wade. I-I'm scared. I don't want you to die. I can't lose you too." He could feel the tears now. The way his shoulders shook and how his breath wavered in sobs. He hadn't seen Peter cry like this. Not since they got out of the lab all those months ago.
But what could he do? He and death played this game so many times. He had a relationship with the damn persona. Dying was what he knew. It was what he expected. What he never expected was to have someone to miss him.
"It's gonna be okay Peter," he said softly, cradling the other man's head to his shoulder. "Everything's going to be okay."
Peter pulled away to look at him, "It's not Wade! You're dying. And I don't know what to do! I can't even hold you." He tried to pull himself away but Wade gripped onto him. At this point to afraid to let him go. "I don't know how to help you. And what about Ellie? Oh my god, Ellie. Fuck, I promised her I'd watch you. I couldn't keep you safe. It's all because of me. It's because I had Bruce make that medicine. I did this-"
"Stop it Peter." Wade gripped onto his shoulders, voice going hard. "Stop."
"But I-"
"You didn't do anything. You need to shut up right now."
Peter closed his mouth with a click. His brown eyes were swarmed with tears, Wade doubted he could see anything. He was kind of grateful for that. Wade shucked off his gloves, taking hold of his face to bring their forheads together. "Breathe baby. Just shut up and breathe."
He knew his own breaths weren't even so he began rubbing circles into Peter's temples. Trying his best to ease him out of that downward spiral. He sighed shaking his head. "Ellie knows that every visit I make could be the last. She knows there's a chance one day I won't make it back. It sucks but she's with people who have taught and raised her better then I ever could. She's going to be fine. One way or the other.
"And you Pete, you're gonna be okay." The hero looked at him with a broken expression. It's like Wade had seen it before. In the mirror maybe. He never got all the details about Peter's life but he knew someone didn't put on the mask without reason. He knew this couldn't be easy for him.
"It's gonna be rough but I know you're gonna be okay. You're the bravest, kindest, most sincere man I know. You're so strong Webs. So strong. You know it's a kink of mine and I totally regret not using it to our advantage more in bed." Peter let out a scoff, his face lifting just a bit. "And I love you too."
Peter looked at him. Wade always like the way his eyes caught light, shining almost gold. Peter was by far one of the best things that had ever happened to him. He felt so much raw emotion for the man he could feel it down to his bones. He loved him. He loved Peter with his whole being. And it was then that he realised he was going to have to leave it behind. He was going to leave Peter behind. His own tears began, his uneven breathing becoming haggered. Peter held him as he sobbed. Wade gripped onto his suit. Never wanting to let go.
-*-
No one commented when they got back into the van. Peter and Wade were tear stained and exaughsted, huddled in each other's arms in the far corner of the van.
They were lead to a church, Kurt was already waiting outside. Dressed in a full priest suit with a patient look on his face. Steve and Peter helped Wade out of the van. Kurt lead them inside with a soft greeting and gave Wade a blanket from somewhere near the podium.
"Elf," Wade greeted first with a shaky smile.
"Wade," he replied taking a seat next to him. "What brings you here?"
"A mission. With SHIELD, it was legit I swear. Or not, sorry padre."
Kurt sighed looking at the others. Peter in particular. But that could have been because he was holding Wade's hand in a vice. "I assume you need a way back to New York."
"Yep, as quickly as possible if you can. We're on a tight schedule. There's a Golden Girls marathon on TVland tonight."
A hint of a smile took Kurt' s face. He stood up with a nod, "I'll make a few calls. Help yourself to anything here."
"Thank you for the hospitality," Steve said. The others all mumbled a thanks as he went toward a door in the back.
"Maybe I should just call Tony," Peter murmured.
"Why," Wade asked.
"I need to get you somewhere safe. Somewhere Bruce and I can try to make an antidote-"
"Petey," the Merc sighed. "I want to go home."
Peter looked to him with furrowed brows, "but I have to be in a lab. I have to take samples of whatever they used to fix this."
"I don't want to do that."
Peter opened and closed his mouth. He struggled for a moment to understand those words. "We have to! There has to be a way to-"
"I don't want to be fixed Peter. I want to go home."
Peter looked like he wanted to argue. But Wade stared at him with tired eyes so he kept quiet and tangled their fingers together. His eyes began to water again. The hero pressed his face into Wade's shoulder. "Will you come with me?"
"Of course," Peter said with a quiet sob.
They had set up at the church for now. Food and blankets were passed around. Everyone found a place to take comfort until Kurt came back. The jet would be there to pick them up in a few hours. Peter already knew I'd be too late by then. Wade was becoming lethargic.
"You are not healing," Kurt murmured taking a seat beside him. "What has happened?"
"Some bad people got a hold of a powerful drug. The usual," Wade shrugged slightly.
"Nothing you won't come back from I'm sure."
"I don't think this is something I can bounce back from Kurt. It's pretty serious this time." The mutant frown gazing at the way Peter held him. There was a look on his face like he was putting something together.
"Do you mind if I say a prayer?"
Wade smirked shrugging a shoulder, "go ahead." Kurt placed a hand on his shoulder and bowed his head. Peter did too. There was something about the way the foreign words flowed that eased him. It was nostalgic. It brought him back to Sunday mornings with aunt May and uncle Ben on similar pews.
He was able to breathe easier now. His hands didn't grip at Wade so much as hold him.
"Would you like a moment to confess anything?" The priest asked politely.
"Nothing to say that I already haven't," Wade chuckled, it came out as more of a wheeze.
"I believe that," Kurt said with a grin. He looked to Peter as if to ask the same thing. But he had already told Wade what was most important.
-*-
The fly back would take at least six hours. They were given more food and water while they were seated. Everyone thanked Kurt and gave him a proper farewell before leaving. "Spider-Man," he stopped Peter before he could board. Yellow eyes firm yet gentle. "There's not anything Wade hasn't overcome. I believe he will make it through this."
Peter gave him a stiff smile looked toward where the scarred man sat bundled in blankets. "I hope so."
"Good look and may God be with you," he patted the hero's shoulder before sending them off. Peter took his place by Wade's side again. There was a medic on the jet who had given him medication. Most of it was just to numb out the pain. He gave Peter a doppy smile, struggling with the blankets until he could hold his hand again.
"Been a while since I could get high. It's fucking awesome."
Peter laughed getting as close to him as possible. His skin didn't seem to bother him as much now. Wade had eventually untangled himself from the blankets and wrapped them around then both. His grin soothing away all of Peter's worries.
"I know you don't want to work on an antidote but There may be a place you can relax while Peter and Bruce work," Steve offered.
Wade glanced at him. The blanket was pulled up so that only his eyes were visible. He was mostly sprawled over Peter who had his arms wrapped him. "Tony doesn't know about it," Bucky added.
The Merc looked up to Peter who held his tongue. Wade seemed to mull over it a while. Peter moved his fingers in random patterns over Wade's back. He wanted to persuade Wade into agreeing but in the end it was Wade's choice and Peter would respect it no matter what.
"Should we," he asked timidly.
Peter stared at him earnestly, "Please." Wade's lips tugged down. He tucked his head back under Peter's chin in silence. The youngest looked to Steve who gave him a nod. Wade had the whole flight back to think about it. That is, if he was conscious by the time they got back.