Draumr

It was another three days before SHIELD allowed him to go home. He should be thankful he was wearing the suit, they said, as it had absorbed most of the damage. Tony had scoffed, telling them that was the whole point. He was covered in bruises, especially around his ribs, but thankfully nothing was broken.

Naturally, he had tried to whisk away to his lab as soon as he was out, but found his access to his labs closed by orders of Pepper. So now, here he was. In the backroom of a small stage, just a thin layer of wood separating him from the ocean of reporters with millions of questions. He felt a knot form in his stomach, which was unusual for him since he’d practically grown up in front of cameras and reporters. In fact, he hadn’t felt this scared of facing the mass since he returned from the Ten Ring’s capture. His hands were shaking, barely holding onto the small cue cards he was supposed to be reading from. Tony found himself thankful to have them for once. A slight reassurance than he had something to fall back to should he fuck this up. Damn Pepper for making him do this.

Speak of the devil; Pepper poked her head through the door. A low buzzing came from inside. People talking, reporters sharing stories and theories. He could already hear the clicks and flashes of cameras. Sometimes, being famous really sucked.

“You ready?” Pepper asked with a small smile. Tony sighed, straightening his hair back with his hand.

“As ready as I’ll ever be,” He said, standing from his chair and following his CEO onto the small stage. The moment he stepped over the threshold, the crowd exploded. Flashes from the cameras blinded him, people screamed his name, shouting questions he had no hope of hearing. Tony felt something protective and aggressive surge up in his chest, and promptly stomped down on it. He had started recognizing the feeling by this point, and refused to let it slip up. What he needed was to finish this, get back to his lab and find results.

Tony didn’t even realize he had stopped in front of the microphone before he was flashing his classic newsworthy grin at the camera. If it was stiffer than usual, no one would notice. He sighed- wishing he was miles away- and looked down at the cards.

“Thank you, thank you,” He told the crowd, motioning for them to quiet down. It worked like clockwork, and the journalists and photographers all quieted down. On top of the stage, Tony was god, and his words would be written down and shared with all. It was up to him to make it sound good.

“There’s been speculations about the last Avenger’s battle wherein I was directly involved. Footage was released of me going toe to toe with the aggressor. As a result of this, a lot of people are asking questions as to what happened…” he paused, seeking comfort in the cards. “To this, I can only say… I won. The footage shows me and the attacker disappearing. To sum it up, we appeared in a different place and I beat him.”

It was half-true anyways.

“We don’t yet know what technology he was using, but I can assure you that we are working on that as we speak. I have specialists doing readings on the items recovered from the battle. I wish there was more I could tell you about the situation, but as it is highly confidential, I have probably already overstepped the line. Any questions?”

As expected, the crowd exploded. Questions were thrown at him left and right. Tony gave a strained smile, pointing to one of the prettier ones near the front.

“The Washington Post. Mr. Stark, do you know anything about the man who committed these crimes, and should the public fear more of these attacks?” Yes, Tony knew. Knew more than he wanted to. He’d read Alan Brill’s file over thirty times at least and had JARVIS conduct extra research. If there was anything to know about Alan, Tony knew it.

“I’m afraid I don’t know anything. We are still trying to identify the attacker. As for future threats, it is a possibility we cannot deny. So from now on out, the Avengers are on high alert for any threats similar. Next?”

It continued like this for longer than Tony would like. Question after question, each one sounding the same. It was slowly driving him insane. He was feeling restless, fiddling with the cards hidden behind the lectern. At this point, he was barely paying any attention to the desperate shouts for attention.

Until…

“What about the car accident a few weeks back? Wasn’t Stark Industries involved in that?” Tony froze, only for a split second, but it was enough. The crowd noticed, and soon everyone was whispering, the room buzzing with curiosity. His eyes trailed over the crowd until he found the culprit. A particular nasty journalist he’d had the displeasure of dealing with before. What was her name again? Brown? Something like that.

“I am not here to discuss that matter today,” He said stiffly.

“If not today then when? The public deserves an answer.” Like hell they do. He was the one who flew a missile into space to save them. The least they could do is listen to him.

“I do believe Ms. Potts has already answered questions about that incident-”

“Are you trying to avoid the question, Mr. Stark?”

“That all depends. Are you trying to bring up a disclosed case Ms. Brown?” That earned a small twitch of her lips. The room had gone relatively quiet, everyone listening on the conversation between the reporter and Stark. Right now, Tony couldn’t care less about the others. His chest was rising slowly, trying to keep calm enough as to not make something explode.

“We have free press here in America, Mr. Stark. Or did you not know that?” she replied with a slight edge to her voice that made Tony grit his teeth in annoyance. What had started as a hot one-night stand had all too quickly turned into a nuisance.

“You didn’t say which newspaper you’re from.” The words slipped off his tongue before he could stop them. “Wasn’t it vanity fair? Except wait… they fired you, didn’t they?”

Pepper came up behind him, tugging at his arm. Part of Tony wanted to follow, to just give in now and get off this damned stage, return to his lab and work. But the other part, the much stronger part, urged him to continue. Especially when he saw Ms. Brown’s facial expression.

“Ms. Potts said that the car accident was caused by a self-driving vehicle. One of your own inventions. Does this mean that you are testing possibly dangerous technology in public? Do you not care about the public’s safety?” Tony resisted the urge to growl. She never let go, did she? God, he wanted to walk down there and show how much he hated her. All eyes were on him now, even the cameras had stopped flashing. Tony could feel the atmosphere in the room like a weight on his shoulders, pushing him down.

“The car incident was unintentional. A glitch in the programme that Stark Industries had nothing to do with. If I did not care about the safety of the public, I wouldn’t have flown a throttleable ducted rocket missile into a wormhole,” Pepper was really tugging at his arm now, telling him to get off the stage before he did something stupid. Tony ignored her, too caught up in his conversation with Brown to even notice.

“And we are all extremely thankful for your sacrifice. However, wasn’t the missile sent to destroy the aliens and Manhattan, also sent by the same government agency you work for?” Tony was just about to snap that he was only a consultant when two agents, no doubt sent by SHIELD to keep an eye on him, came out from the sides and yanked the microphone away from him.

“Mr. Stark will not be taking anymore questions,” One of them said while the other worked on escorting a seething Pepper and a very grumpy Tony out of the room.

He said nothing while he was being yelled at, neither by SHIELD agents, Fury on the phone, or Pepper in the car. Their words were blurred and thick, while Tony took refuge in his mind. There, the reporter’s words were echoing loudly, over and over. “wasn’t the missile sent to destroy the aliens and Manhattan, also sent by the same government agency you work for?” He didn’t know what to do with that information. Like an equation that was, god be damned, too hard to solve. It churned in his head, around and around, but he couldn’t make sense of it. Because he wanted her to be wrong, but… wasn’t she right? He had never really thought about it before, but SHIELD was working for the same people who had ordered a nuclear strike on their own city with only a small hope that it would actually work. As much as he hated to admit it, Ms. Brown was right.

God, he needed a drink.

“I need to take care of some business in the office. I’ll see you tomorrow.” Pepper said, not really knowing if Tony could even hear her or not. Just as she was about to exit the car, Tony’s hand shot out of its own and grabbed her wrist in a tight grip. Tony was looking at her, a desperately lost expression on his face.

“Please don’t leave…” He all but whispered, trying to pull her back inside. Pepper sighed, shaking her head. Feeling a pang of guilt when she looked into his wide, unsure eyes.

“I’m sorry, Tony. I need to do this now, try and keep the press in control. I’ll see you again tomorrow, I promise,” She said, gently loosening his grip on her arm. Tony just stared as she closed the car door behind her, told the driver (some young kid Tony didn’t know the name of) to take him to Stark tower, before she disappeared into the SI headquarters. The car started driving again, and Tony turned, defeated in his seat.

It was another fifteen minutes until he got back to the tower. Despite the driver managing to get lost twice, Tony threw a huge (unknown) sum of money at him and left without a word. JARVIS greeted him the moment he stepped through the doors, and took care of the elevator, sending Tony to his lab.

DUM-E was waiting for him in the lab, a smoothie at the ready. Tony made a double check with JARVIS before sticking his tongue in it. He’d had enough of oil in his drinks for a lifetime. A couple of smoothies later, he was seated in front of his suit yet again, buried deep in the wiring of the left arm. It had taken quite the hit in the battle with Alan Brill. The inventor made a note to have JARVIS do some extra research and find out where Alan Brill has spent the last years.

It was hours later, and Tony was soon done with the midsection of the suit, and had placed in the orders for the necessary materials, when JARVIS announced Bruce’s presence.

“He says there’s something important he needs to talk about, sir.”

“Let him in,” Tony muttered, not looking up from the suit. Thanks to the damage, he had had to peel back almost everything and pick out broken pieces of metal that were jamming the screws. The doors slid open, and he heard Bruce’s unsure footsteps approach. With a small sigh, he decided to take a break from the suit for now, and see what his science bro wanted.

“Brucie,” He said, smiling. “What brings you to my humble abode?”

“I need to talk to you. It’s important…” Bruce trailed off, fumbling with a small pad he held between his fingers.

“So Jarvis said. Exactly what is so important that you couldn’t just let J inform me?” Tony asked, raising an interested eyebrow. The doctor shook his head, holding up the phone and tapped the screen three times. A hologram shot out of the phone, taking the form of a small screen full of numbers and words Tony recognized from basic hanging-out-with-Bruce-time. Words like “haemoglobin” and “lymphocyte” were a few of the ones he recognized from listening to Bruce mumble to himself.

“This is the result of your blood test that you gave me a few weeks ago,” Bruce explained. Tony nodded. He remembered that day very well.

“Well, aside from a higher amount of troponin T, which is no doubt a result from your… well, your time in… you know…”

“Afghanistan.” Tony finished for him. Bruce nodded quickly. It was a subject they generally tried to avoid talking about, as well as Bruce’s own accident. A mutual understanding between the two that Tony appreciated more than he would admit.

“Yes, that. Anyways. Aside from the unusually high amount of troponin T -which you should watch out for by the way- everything seems fairly normal, right?” Tony’s eyes travelled over the document again, trying to decipher it. After coming to the conclusion that he had absolutely no idea what he was even looking at, he simply nodded.

“Right. Good… But if you look closer here,” The doctor zoomed in on a microscopic image of Tony’s blood. “You can see, there are unknown, microscopic particles that have attached themselves to, and are merging with every single cell”

Now that Bruce mentioned it, Tony could see the small, barely noticeable white dots decking his red blood cells. And Jesus… there were thousands of them. Every cell he saw was covered with small, white dots, blotches of discolouration where they merged into slightly bigger shapes.

“Well, what the hell do they mean?” Tony said, unable to keep the slightly desperate edge out of his voice.

“I… I don’t know. I’ve never seen anything like it. The result of your EEG, these weird… things in your blood. I have no idea what they are.” Bruce explained, looking just as freaked out as Tony felt. The inventor looked back at the image, letting his hand travel through the hologram as if he could somehow touch it, remove the blotches from his body by removing them from the screen. He didn’t know what to think, or what to feel. Again, the horrible blankness fell over him, and all he could feel was lost. A deep, dark hole in his chest. A whole that would never be filled… would never leave him.

“Does Shield know…?” He mumbled, not taking his eyes off the screen.

“No. I made sure they didn’t get any blood samples while you were out. No one knows but us.” Bruce replied, lifting a small weight off Tony’s shoulders. The last thing he needed was for this information to get in the wrong hands. He nodded.

“Good. Make sure no one finds out. I don’t want this information in the wrong hands. God knows what they’ll do…”

“Know the feeling. I’ll send you a copy for inspection.” Bruce said, tapping the screen again. Tony watched as the image disappeared, and it felt like normality finally dawned on them once again. Just like that, it was over. Like they had just returned to reality again. There was nothing else they could do, at least not at that moment. Tony would sleep, knowing Bruce had his back. That at least he wasn’t completely alone in this.

“Wanna come help me make dinner?” Bruce asked, catching the billionaire off guard. Normally, Tony would have scrunched his nose up and made a joke about his cooking (which admittedly wasn’t the best in the world). But for once he felt like he needed a better distraction. Knowing himself, he knew that his mind would haunt him with images and memories he’d rather forget. The newest result of his blood sample only adding to the bunch of weird occurrences. Maybe it would do him some good to just take a break from it all, and actually interact with the team he’d decided to share a roof with.

“You know what… sure. Let’s go.” Tony said, finally, getting up from the chair. DUM-E whirred over with a towel, which he used to wipe his hands and face. He would need a shower later, or maybe even a proper bath in the jacuzzi. But for now, the towel would do.

Bruce seemed surprised by his answer, but quickly covered it up with a warm smile. Tony found himself returning it, despite everything that had happened lately. I really did need this, he thought to himself.

“What are we having?” He asked as they moved towards the door. Bruce’s smile widened, reaching his eyes for once.

“I was thinking biryani.”