Abandoned

Loki couldn't remember the last time he'd been so content just standing still. His son was literally wrapped around him, and he never wanted to move again. Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew he couldn't stay, but he didn't want to confront that thought just yet. He wanted this moment- this perfect moment- to last as long as possible. 

Jor didn't hate him. He still hated himself, sure, but his son loved him. He idly wondered if his other children would be so forgiving. 

"Papa, how did you find me? Odin said he would make sure you could never find me..."

The bitterness in Jörmungandr's voice was thick, and Loki had the sudden urge to curse at the sky. It seemed Odin's treachery knew no bounds. Jor had been an innocent child, but Odin had still managed to scar him seemingly beyond repair. 

Loki turned his head to look at the quinjet. 

"My...friend, Tony brought me here after Thor told him where you were." 

Loki tripped over the word friend. He hadn't realized how foreign the term was to him, or how long it had been since he'd had friends of his own. Thor had friends, but no matter how hard Loki tried, he could never manage to fit in with them. He'd saved their lives on multiple occasions, but that never mattered to them. Or to his brother. They always seemed to find ways to make him feel other. What made matters worse was that they did not understand his unique ability to be both boy and girl. And what they didn't understand was completely unacceptable. They called him names- weakling, dark one, girly boy, and ergi. 

He was the youngest, so for a while he assumed that was the reason for their torment, but after a while it began to wear on him. When he'd told Thor how much it bothered him, his brother did exactly what he expected; he laughed. 

"Oh, come on Loki! They're just playing! It's not as if you haven't played your fair share of pranks on them!"

While that was true, Loki hadn't started toying with them until they began torturing him. Thankfully, the older he got, the more advanced his Seidr became, and Thor's friends started to fear him. 

"Are your friends afraid of me?" Jor's lisping voice brought Loki out of his memories, and he smiled at his overgrown son. 

"I don't...think so." Truthfully, he had no idea. Would the Avengers fear a giant serpent? 

"Would you like to meet them, son?" 

Jor's excited hiss made Loki's heart lighter than it had been in years, possibly even decades. He remembered that sound. Jor used to make that same sound when he was just a baby. Loki suddenly recalled the way Jor would react when they played together, or when Loki brought him a field mouse for dinner. 

"There's just one thing...I have a um, a kitten. Her name is Fennie. And she's- "

Jor interrupted him. "I know. Friend, not food. I remember. I like fish best now anyway." 

Loki couldn’t believe Jor remembered his warning from so long ago. It had been a challenge keeping his serpent child from eating things he shouldn’t, especially when people let their pets run free.

“How in the Nine do you remember such things? You were just small. You’ve lived an entire life without me, Jor.”

The enormity of his own words hit Loki like a ton of bricks, and he had to fight back another wave of fresh tears. He hadn’t cried this much since he was a small boy himself and Thor had stolen his favorite dagger. He supposed years of rejection had hardened his heart until the mere idea of shedding tears was absurd- until he was faced with his own offspring.

He suddenly remembered that Jor wanted to meet his friends, so he made a simple hand motion at the quinjet window, knowing that everyone inside had been watching them.

They were such nosy mortals.

Bucky was the first to disembark; nearly tripping over his own feet to catch Fennie before she got away from him.

“Fennie, no! Giant snake!”

Loki laughed. “It’s okay, Buck. Jor won’t hurt her.”

He scooped Fennie up from the grass and held her so Jörmungandr could see her. Bucky stopped running and stood anchored to his spot- staring at Loki’s son in awe. 

"H-hi. It's nice to, um...see you finally," Bucky muttered awkwardly. 

Jörmungandr laughed heartily; hissing and flicking his long forked tongue. Loki couldn't help the wide smile that broke out across his face. 

"Do not be intimidated, friend of papa. I will not harm you."  

 Bucky still stared, open-mouthed until finally turning to Loki. 

"He's just like you. He's...smart. I mean, not that I expected any different, but holy shit. He's glorious." 

Loki felt his chest swell with pride. He hadn't felt so proud in a very long time. Not since Jor, Fenrir, and Hel had been born.

He never allowed himself to think about Vali and Narfi anymore. It was just too painful. Even the taste of their names in the back of his throat made him feel like he would die from heartache. But now was not the time to think of such things. 

Natasha approached with caution and Loki laughed as his son hissed appreciatively. 

"Not your type, Jor," Loki muttered. "She'd tie you in a knot and leave you for dead." 

"That's quite a big, uh..." Tony started, but Loki cut him off before he could get any further with the innuendo. 

"Stop Stark. This is my son, Jor." 

Tony actually looked chagrined when everyone in the group turned to give him a scolding glare, and he immediately switched into problem-solving mode.

"So Jor, what do you like to eat out here? And is there enough of it?" 

Jörmungandr told Tony all of the different types of fish he enjoyed while Tony made an extensive list. The next question was if the giant serpent had plenty of room to move around. The lake was very spacious, and Loki's son was content with his living space. He even enjoyed the visitors he had from all over the world. Jörmungandr's only real complaint was that there had been many cruel tourists who'd tried to catch him in their nets. They'd obviously been unsuccessful, but he had been injured on multiple occasions. 

Loki was beyond furious. He'd seen the cruelty of the human race. He knew how selfish they could be, and it normally didn't bother him, but when it affected his son, he found that he couldn't ignore it. 

"I can't stand by and allow that to happen! I don't care if they aren't capable of doing any real damage!"

Tony tentatively placed his hand on Loki's shoulder, taking his phone from his jeans pocket. 

"I've got this."

 Stark walked to the Quinjet and made a few phone calls. Later that night, and every morning and evening thereafter, there would be a very large assortment of fish dropped into Loch Ness by helicopter. And no one would be allowed to bring weapons, nets, or spears onto the preserve ever again. 

Loki had known that he would have to say goodbye sooner than he liked, but he'd had no idea how hard it would be. As he stood on the shore watching Jor dive back down into the deep water, he wondered how long it would be before he would see his son again. It wasn't as if they could just fly out here any time Loki started longing for a hug. He would have to remember the way he had felt wrapped in Jor's massive body. It had been so long since Loki had felt truly loved by anyone other than his mother. He hadn't realized how much he needed his children's forgiveness until now. 

Tears streamed down Loki's face as he stepped into the Quinjet, and he didn't bother wiping them away. Thankfully, the others were respectful enough not to say anything. They didn't even look at him, and for that he was eternally grateful. He sat down in his seat and watched the ripples in the water's surface from the tiny window and imagined his Jor happily chasing fish under the water. 

"You okay man?" Bucky whispered. 

Loki didn't answer, and Bucky placed a sleeping Fennie in his arms. Loki couldn't help the tiny smile that formed on his lips. He held her close to his chest and fell asleep listening to her purr.