Fated Marks

Calliope’s POV-

“Mhm…” I groaned as the light came in from the window. I rolled over under the covers facing away from the light. I shifted uncomfortably and that’s when I realized I was still wearing yesterday’s clothes. I lifted my head slightly to see where I was and noticed I was back in my room. The last thing I remembered was sitting around the fire pit on that roof in Brooklyn with Thor and his friends. I have no idea how I got home.  

I sat up and groaned before I felt my stomach churning. I quickly got up and ran to the bathroom. I barely made it on time to not miss but once I was down that was it.

I heard the living room door open and then some light padding when something fuzzy started nuzzling me.

“Uh, Hey buah!” I said not even having time to pet Lucky. I heard footsteps and then a sigh before I felt Clint kneel behind me and pull my hair back as he rubbed my back.

“Let it out.” He said.

“Not like… Bwuah!... uh!” I groaned.

“Don’t talk, just get it out.” Clint said.

“I don’t feel good.” I whined.

“I know.” He said handing me a glass of water. “Rinse.”

I did as he said and spat it out.

“Ew.” I cried.

“Anything hurt?” Clint asked.

“My head, my eyes, everything.” I said.

“Can you stand?” Clint asked.

“Mhm.” I nodded as I leaned against the toilet bowl.

“You’ll feel better after you shower. Meanwhile I’ll go get started on breakfast.” He said and at the mention of food I started gagging and throwing up again. “It’s okay.” Clint reassured as I finished puking the last of it.

“I’m never drinking again.” I groaned.

“That’s what we all say.” He said helping me up. “I brought in some clothes for you to change into.”

“Thanks.” I said.

“Jump in the shower, it’ll help.” Clint said. With that he and Lucky left the bathroom and closed the door behind them.

I looked in the mirror and shivered at the sight in front of me. I looked like crap. I stripped and jumped in the shower. It was comforting and woke me up more than before. I got out and got dressed in the Columbia tee I normally saved for finals week and some leggings to lounge around in. When I was ready I left the bathroom to be greeted with the smell of freshly brewed coffee and bacon.

“Perfect timing sit.” Clint said.

“I’m really not hungry.” I said.

“That’s the hangover talking. Just take a few bites, it’ll help settle your stomach.” He said putting a plate of bacon and eggs in front of me.

I hesitantly picked up a piece of bacon and took a small bite out of it. It was salty and slightly grease but I wasn’t gagging again so that was a win.

“So what happened yesterday?” Clint asked and I stayed quiet.

I couldn’t really tell him about me sneaking off to work and Tony having to drive me back without confessing I broke my promise. So I’ll just have to work around that.

“Well I suck at relaxing so after stress cleaning and some ice cream I went down to the bar for some wings and Thor was there. He was pretty bummed out Jane broke up with him.” I said.

“They broke up? Damn, that sucks.” Clint said.

“Yeah we got to talking and we ended up going to this place in Brooklyn. I really didn’t Thor would be into heavy metal punk rock music but he is and it was pretty fun. He knew the band that was playing and after we went out for dinner and drinks. Then after we got kicked out of there we ended up on their apartment roof and that’s where the night gets fuzzy. I don’t even remember getting home.” I said.

“You probably wouldn’t considering you were passed out.” Clint said. “I woke up at two in the morning with Thor knocking at the door and you slung over his shoulder.”

“Aww he carried me home, what a sweetheart.” I said.

“He did, not really what I was expecting to wake up to. Did you know you talk in your sleep?” Clint asked.

“Uh I did not.” I said taking a sip of the coffee.

“You said something about Fertility and Cancer.” Clint said.

“That’s random.” I said trying to play it off.

“Really?” Clint asked. “You’ve been off since you got back from the hospital on Friday and you smoked which you hate doing. You want to tell me what’s going on with you?”

“I was going to tell you but you were really happy because of your date with Nat and didn’t want to ruin it.” I said.

“Cal you’re really starting to worry me here.” Clint said.

“When you guys stepped out of the room and my doctor went over my medical history. She brought up the cancer thing and she told me I had to start thinking about my fertility plan because even though I’m only nineteen I’m apparently a ticking cancer bomb waiting to happen which is freaking me out because I’m not ready to have a kid and I’m not even sure I want a kid to begin with and I just made it official with Nate which is really bad timing because I can’t bring any of this up with him but lately that’s all I can think about and anytime I’m not busy I keep hearing the words Cancer fertility kids over and over again and it’s making me nuts.” I blurted out and started tearing up again.

“Hey, hey it’s okay.” He said hugging me.

“No its not. I’m a freaking train wreck who can barely manage herself let alone a kid.” I cried.

“You’re not a train wreck Cal you just have a lot going on and this isn’t easy for anyone no matter what age you are.” Clint said.

“What am I supposed to do Clint?” I asked. “I’ve never even had sex and I have to decide whether or not I want kids.”

“You need to start by calming down because freaking out isn’t helping you. We’re gonna figure this out.” He said. “Okay let’s start the same way you start with any other problem. Pro and Con list.”

I got up went to the counter and took out the tiny notebook I used to write down notes or reminders. I opened it up to the list I had started yesterday and put it down in front of him.

“Oh, should have known you would have already started one. Let’s see what we’ve got. Pro: tax deductible. Really Cal?” Clint said giving her a look.

“I was trying to be objective. I’m a scientist.” I said.

Clint shook his head but continued reading.

“Pro: I’ll never be alone. That’s true.” He said with a smile before he read the next one and frowned. “Con: I’ll never be alone?”

“I like having me time. That’s going to be hard if there’s a kid running around getting into trouble, crying and pooping all of the time.” I said.

“Do you have any experience with kids?” Clint asked.

“Not really I’m the youngest of all my siblings remember?” I reminded him.

“Okay, pro and con lists were a bad idea. This isn’t something you can approach with cold logic and facts.” Clint said. “It might be time you call your dad or maybe even your…”

“Don’t finish that sentence.” I said.

“Why are you so afraid of your…” Clint started.

“Afraid of who?” Will said walking in. “Wow you look like crap.”

“Crazy night.” I answered.

“I can tell.” Will said. “So you up for dress shopping. We need to find your groomsmaid dress.”

“I thought I was maid of honor?” I asked.

“Yeah but I just wanted to say that at least once.” Will said.

“If I give you my credit card and measurements can you just go and pick something out for me?” I asked.

“But Cal, going from store to store and trying out dresses is the best part.” Will pouted.

“What about that dress you showed me. The long one with the organza skirt.” I said. “Why don’t you get me that one?”

“Cal it’s a Vera Wang dress. That thing is going to be pricey. And they don’t do off the rack it would have to be bought right now so they can make it in time for the wedding.” Will said.

“Okay.” I said going for my credit card.

“Are you sure? It’s not going to be cheap.” Will said.

“You only get married for the first time once.” I said.

“That sounds like something your mother would say.” Will said.

“You’ve met Cal’s mom?” Clint asked.

“Yeah…” Will said shivering slightly. “She popped in unexpectedly a few months after I moved in.”

“What is with you two? She can’t be that bad.” Clint said. Will and I exchanged looks.

“She is.” Will and I answered at the same time. “I should probably…”

“You know where my credit card is.” I said.

“Uhuh.” He said walking into my room.

“Cal she’s still your mom.” Clint said.

“Clint you don’t know her so just take our word for it when we say she’s really that bad.” I said.

“She made me cry dude.” Will said. “I’ll be back later to drop off your credit card.”

“Have fun.” I said.

“How about your Dad?” Clint asked.

“You know I just dropped the cancer gene news on him, I’d rather not ask him his opinion on grandchildren so soon.” I said as my phone started ringing. I picked it up.

“Hello.” I answered.

“Hey Cal its Steve.” Steve said.

“Hey what’s up?” I said.

“I was just wondering if you’d mind if I came over to drop some things off. Bucky made me go home and I figured since I was heading that way…” Steve started.

“Sure, I’ll be here all day so feel free to drop by whenever.” I said.

“Thank you.” Steve said. “I should be there within the hour.”

“I’ll be here.” I said before hanging up.

“New roommates?” Clint asked.

“Yeah. Steve’s going to drop off some stuff before heading back to see Bucky.” I said.

“Back to your problem then, did you really never think about having kids?” Clint asked.

“It never came up. I was the youngest and up until I was six I was practically an only child.” I said.

“Then maybe you need to spend time with a kid to get a taste of what it would be like?” He suggested.

“Where am I going to find a kid to borrow? I don’t know anyone with a kid.” I said as Clint’s phone started ringing. He cracked a smile before turning to look at me. “Take it. It’s okay.”

“I’ll be back.” He said stepping out. I finished up breakfast and started cleaning up when Clint came back. “I think I have someone here for you.”

I turned around and saw Clint standing next to Steve.

“Hey you.” I said going to greet him with a hug.

“Hey, sorry to bother you on your day off.” Steve said.

“It’s no trouble I was going to be here doing nothing anyway.” I said.

“I was just going to put in a few things in the room.” Steve said.

“It’s your apartment too Steve you don’t have to ask and before I forget.” I said going to the kitchen and bringing out the apartment keys. “Your and Bucky’s keys.”

“I really can’t thank you enough Cal.” Steve said.

“Stop already, you’re doing me a favor.” I said.

“You really are. Without a roommate she becomes a hermit.” Clint said.

“Roof!” Lucky barked.

“I didn’t know you had a dog.” Steve said as Lucky came over growling.

“Lucky!” Clint scolded and he whined. “He’s actually mine.”

“Hey boy.” Steve said kneeling and reaching over to offer his hand for Lucky to sniff. He sniffed a bit before licking it and going to nuzzle Steve.

“He’s really friendly and good company.” I assured him. “You and Bucky aren’t allergic right?”

“No we’re good.” Steve said. “I’m just gonna start bringing in stuff.”

“Need a hand?” Clint offered.

“Sure.” Steve said.

“I’ll…” I started.

“Sit on the couch and take it easy like you were supposed to this weekend.” Clint said sternly.

“Okay.” I said going over to the couch. “Come on Lucky let’s see what’s on?”

The guys quickly started bringing in things and I just watched since there was nothing on TV.

“So that’s the last of it and I was wondering if you’d mind if I started coming over you know to shower and stuff…” Steve started.

“Steve, this is your home now too. You don’t have to ask.” I said.

“Is there really nothing I could do pay you back?” He asked.

“Do you by chance know anyone with a kid I can borrow?” I asked jokingly.

“Come again?” Steve asked confused.

“Nothing just something we’re trying to work out.” Clint elaborated.

“Uh sorry I don’t know anyone off the top of my head but Buck and I volunteer at the youth center. You guys should stop by sometime.” Steve said.

“I might do that.” I said.

“I have to get going. I’ll see you both later.” Steve said.

“Say Hi to Bucky for me.” I said.

“I will.” Steve said before leaving.

“Okay so I was the youth center…” Clint started.

“Clint can we just drop it for a bit. We’re just going in circles.” I said frustrated. “I mean most people have time to figure this out or just have an instinct for it, I don’t have either. I mean you always knew you wanted kids.”

“I grew up in foster care, it was what we all wanted.” Clint said. “I wanted the house with a white picket fence. A nice girl to settle down, have a house full of kids and a dog. Now I waited too long and I’m divorced, with an empty house up state and am seriously considering freezing my sperm but what would be the point if I have no one who wants to have my kid.”

I sat up on my knees and pulled Clint into a hug. “This conversation got depressing really fast.” I said.

“Yeah sorry we’re supposed to be trying to work out your problem.” Clint said.

“Friends are the family we choose Clint. It may not be the way you expected it but you do have a family.” I said.

“I know.” He said hugging me back.

The Next Day-

Clint and I decided to drop the subject for the day. Instead he spent the day trying to distract me from thinking about it. It worked for a bit but a lot of people in New York have kids. And there are a lot of kids on TV.

I tossed and turned for most of the night and just drifted through the motions of the day. Nate just talked away during our regular coffee hour so he didn’t really notice. Tony and Bruce though picked up pretty fast.

“So I need you to order two more…” Tony started.

“Mhm.” I hummed in agreement.

“And I could use a hand with the titrations when you have time.” Bruce said.

“Mhm.” I said.

“Also need to start Bucky on his exercises, get him out of bed.” Tony said.

“Mhm.” I said as I nervously twiddled a pen with my hand as I stared at my pro and con list.

“I also need you to get me a SpongeBob costume.” Tony said.

“Mhm.” I said.

“And she’s not listening to me is she?” Tony said

“Don’t think so. Cal?” Bruce asked. 

“Hm, Sorry what was it you were saying?” I said.

“You okay?” Bruce asked.

“Uh… Yeah. No I’m need to ask you guys something and you can totally just not answer if it’s way too personal.” I started.

“Cal you’ve literally bought and washed our underwear. You’re practically our work wife.” Tony said.

“I don’t think I should ask now.” I said.

“Should I have a kid?” Bruce said reading from the notebook in front of me. “Uh… is there something going on?”

“Are you…” Tony started.

“Woah no no no no no no no no. no oh hell no.” I said. “Guys. That is… no.”

“Then what were you going to ask us?” Bruce asked.

“You two are the best at what you do, world renown scientists, revolutionized your respective fields.” I started.

“Spit it out already.” Tony said.

“How come you two don’t have kids?” I asked.

“I have a feeling there’s a story here.” Tony said.

“When the black outs started I had a full work up done and because of my family history my doctor decided to check for any genetic predispositions and I’m a carrier of the BRCA gene.” I said and both Tony and Bruce frowned and looked like they wanted to say something. “Guy’s I’m fine. I don’t have cancer, just a bigger chance of getting it. I’m getting routine checks. I’m good.”

“That’s still a lot to handle.” Bruce said.

“Oh that’s not the hard part.” I said. “On Friday when my GP came to discharge me she told me I had to start working on a fertility plan because if I do end up getting cancer it’ll be early on and my chances of having kids will be almost non existent and I have no idea if I even want kids because I’m only nineteen and…”

“Cal.” Tony said.

“Most days I can barely keep myself together, now imagine a kid.” I said feeling out of breath.

“Cal.” Bruce said getting concerned.

“I mean most people don’t have to even think about whether or not they want kids until they’re almost thirty and…” I said feeling lightheaded.

“Cal!” Tony said putting a hand on my shoulder. “I need you to breathe okay.”

“I can’t stop thinking about it.” I said gasping a bit.

“Well, your list is very… logical.” Bruce said looking at it. “Wow having a kid is expensive.”

“Yeah but it hasn’t helped make things easier.” I grimaced.

“I like kids. They’re nice but it was never the right time. I met Betty freshmen year of college. We both wanted the same things. We wanted to finish school, go to grad school. Get married work and we just kept postponing the decision to have kids but we always agreed we weren’t ready and then we just stopped.” Bruce said.

“Do you regret it?” I asked.

“No. It was the right choice. Kids are great but I love my wife and what I do and she’s the same way.” Bruce said.

“So a career is better than having a kid?” I asked.

“No, I mean… uh help?” Bruce asked.

“Okay, come on.” Tony said standing up. “It’s field trip time.”

“Right now?” I asked.

“Yup. Bruce lets go.” Tony said.

“I could use a break.” Bruce said.

“You’re willingly leaving the lab, I think that’s the first time since I started working here.” I said.

“You always help us, it’s our turn to help you.” Bruce said.

“Okay where are we going?” I asked confused.

“You’ll see.” Tony said.

We headed down to the garage and got into one of Tony’s cars before he drove off. I was really confused when we were out of the city and headed towards Long Island. Bruce didn’t seem at all surprised which meant he knew where we were going.

Eventually we stopped at a private road blocked by an iron gate. Tony waved at the guard and he immediately opened the gate without a second thought.

We drove more for a bit more before we stopped in front of a giant mansion.

“Guessing this is another one of your houses?” I asked.

“Yes and no.” Tony said as we walked up the steps and I saw the plaque.

Maria Collins Children’s Home

“This is…” I said as the door opened.

“Mister Stark!” An elderly woman said. “Doctor Banner, I didn’t know you two were coming.”

“We were in the area and thought we’d stop by to check on things.” Tony said.

“Tony!!!” A crowd of children cheered before running out to tackle Tony into a hug.

“Woah, we talked about the hugging.” Tony said laughing but returning the hug either way.

“Bruce!” They said before going to hug Bruce as well.

“I got an A on my science report!” One of the kids said.

“That’s great Tommy!” Bruce cheered.

“So guys, we want you to meet someone.” Tony said. “This is our friend Cal.”

All the kids turned to look at me.

“Hi.” I said waving awkwardly.

“Are you a scientist too?” One of the girls asked.

“You bet she is.” Tony said.

“What type?” The girl asked.

“Computers.” I answered.

“Tony brought me a programming book. Come on I’ll show you.” She said grabbing my hand and leading me inside. I looked at Bruce and Tony who just smiled and waved me off.

I followed Ellie inside where she led me to the library.

“Do computers really talk in ones and zeros?” She asked.

“Yeah. It’s a special language called binary.” I said. “There are lots of other ones like C++ and Java.”

Ellie tilted her head. I thought she was confused before she smiled.

“Can you show me how?” She said.

“Sure.” I said and that’s where what started off as a programming lesson turned into her showing me her notebook full of drawings of things she wanted to build one day. Most of them were the usual things like flying cars and spaceships. My favorite as the microwave that magically made anything you wanted out of thin air.

“Hey kiddo what are you two up to.” Tony asked.

“Ellie was just showing me her idea journal.” I said smiling.

“Oh, got any new ones for me?” Tony asked.

“I have an idea for rocket skates.” She said.

“Rocket skates! Wow!” Tony said with exaggerated glee. “Well kiddo Kat wanted me to tell you it’s time to head down for a snack before homework time.”

“Okay. Bye Cal!” She said surprising me with a hug.

“Oh, bye sweetie.” I said gently returning the hug before she ran off.

“Having fun?” Tony asked with a smirk.

“I am though I’m still wondering what’s going on.” I said.

“You asked why we never had kids. Bruce told you his reasons now I’m showing you my kids.” Tony said.

“Wow you must have knocked up a lot of women.” I said and Tony rolled his eyes.

“No genius. I was afraid of having kids. I was afraid I’d turn out like my old man and by the time I realized I wanted them… let’s leave it at it didn’t work out. So I started this place.” Tony said as we walked out of the library. “There are a lot of kids in need of a good home and the system is a wreck. You can’t save them all but that doesn’t mean you can’t try. I try to come up here at least once a month if I can.”

“That’s sweet of you.” I said.

“I am a philanthropist.” He said as we walked down the hall into a separate wing. I started hearing crying.

“What was that?” I asked.

“It’s the nursery.” Tony said. “We have a lot of kids of different ages. A few toddlers and newborns. Mary.”

“Tony, it’s been a while.” The woman said. She looked to be in her thirties with brown hair and hazel eyes. He hair was in a messy bun and she had a kind smile on her face.

“I’ve been busy. How’s the champ doing?” He asked.

“Champ?” I asked.

“He’s been fussy, but it’s normal for after he get’s discharged.” Mary said.

“Well it should be the last one for a while.” Tony said walking over to a crib.

“A few months ago a woman showed up in the middle of the night all banged up, soaked to the bone and pregnant. Her name was Delilah. Said her husband had done that to her but she wouldn’t say who he was. By the time we got her to the hospital she had already gone into preterm labor.” Mary said. “She didn’t make it but this little guy did. He had a rough start but Cal is strong.”

“His name is Cal?” I asked.

“His mom named him before she died. Cal, Cal Adams.” Mary said.

I looked down at little Cal. He was wailing, his face was red, his little hands clenched into fists. As soon as his bright green eyes landed on me he stopped crying and just sniffled a bit.

“Would you like to hold him?” Mary asked.

“I’ve never held a baby before.” I said freaking out.

“It’s not that hard.” Mary said reaching down to scoop Cal up. He immediately started crying very loudly. “Sh sh. Okay just copy my arms. Perfect now here goes.” She gently put him in my arms and I froze. The baby stopped crying and just stared at me before putting his fingers in his mouth and stared at me.

I don’t know what came over me but after that instinct kind of took over and I brought him closer and just gently rocked him in my arms and he actually smiled at me.

“Aren’t you a cutie?” I cooed.

“Hehe!” Cal laughed. There is nothing more magical that a baby’s laughter. Suddenly there was a ringing in my ears.

"Cal, swear to me on whatever it is in this world you love more than anything my son will be safe." 

"P-Please… Cal…P-pl-lease… n-not… drogo…"

I shook it off an gently rocked the baby.

“We normally don’t take newborns but his mom asked us to look after him. She didn’t care about anything other that making sure he would be okay. She even told the doctors to let her die if he would be okay.” Mary said.

“Why did he have surgery?” I asked.

“He was born with a hole in his heart. It took a few surgeries to completely fix it but the doctors are confident he won’t be needing any more soon.” Mary said.

“Well he’s very a very happy baby.” I said blowing a raspberry into his cheek making him laugh.

“He normally takes a while to warm up to people, you’re really good with him.” Mary said.

“Hard to believe this is my first time holding a baby.” I said smiling as poked my cheek.

“It’s all instinct and you definitely have it.” She said.

“Huh…” I said.

I ended up spending the rest of the afternoon in the nursery with Cal. Anytime I tried to pass him off to Mary or put him down he’d start crying. I ended up feeding him, burping him and putting him down for his nap.

When it was finally time to go I said goodbye to everyone and got in the car.

“So, how’d you like it?” Tony asked.

“Damn it Tony.” I said tearing up. “Now I want one.”

“You figured it out?” Bruce asked.

“Yeah, now I just have to figure out what’s next.” I said.

“Well there’s adoption.” Bruce said.

“Yeah and I’m open to it but I think I want to go through the whole deal at least once.” I said.

“That narrows it down.” Tony said as we drove back home.

I got dropped off at my building and headed upstairs. As soon as I walked in I sat down on the couch. I thought about everything Mary had said and it gave me a lot to think about, particularly about my mom. She may not be perfect or even that great a person but she did choose to bring me into the world at the risk of her own life. She lost a kid and still managed to hold it mostly together to raise me until dad came into the picture.

I picked up my phone and scrolled through my contacts to dial the number.

“This is Allison Adler de Beauvoir, Please leave a message and I will return your call promptly.” The recording said before the beep.

“Hey Mom just wanted to check in. I know it’d been a while and I just wanted to say Hi…” I started.

The Next Morning-

Clint walked in and I didn’t wait for him to sit down before saying:

“I want to have a kid.” I said and Clint almost slipped.

“You figured it out?” Clint asked.

“No more like Tony and Bruce did. They let me borrow a kid for a day and it just kind of clicked. There’s nothing happier than a baby’s laugh.” I said.

“Your boss found a baby you could borrow?” Clint asked.

“In a way. Ironically the kid’s name was Cal.” I said. “But anyway I know what I want and I know what I want to do.”

“That’s great.” Clint said.

“Are you busy on Friday?” I asked.

“I can move some stuff around. What are we doing?” Clint asked.

“I managed to get us a joint appointment for a consult with a fertility specialist. And before you say anything you’ve been my rock through this entire thing and you helped me figure this out so now I’m returning the favor and giving you a push.” I said.

“You think I should go for it?” Clint asked.

“I thought a lot about what you said yesterday I remembered something my dad once told me. He said that there were a lot of types of love but the only one that was unconditional was the love he had ever had was with me and I want you to have that. You’re gonna be a great dad Clint. Your kid’s going to be lucky to have you.” I said.

“We’re really doing this.” Clint said as it all sank in.

“Yup.” I said. “We’re gonna have a kids… at some point.”

“I’m freezing my sperm.” Clint said.

“I’m freezing my eggs.” I said with a smile. “Fuck.”

“What?” He asked.

“There’s going to be a lot of needles involved.”  I said.

“You can hold my hand.” Clint said.

“I’m gonna have to take you up on that.” I said.

“So are you going to tell Nate?” Clint asked.

“No, we’ve only been together a weekend and he was gone for most of it. We’re not there yet.” I said.

Friday Morning-

We sat in the waiting room for a bit filling out some paperwork.

“Done.” Clint said.

“Same.” I said standing up. “I got it.”

“Thanks.” Clint said. I got up and handed it to the nurse when the door to one of the offices opened.

“Can I get your ID?” The nurse said.

“Sure.” I said handing it to her and she scanned it with my application and did the same with Clint’s.

“You’re all set your names will be called when the doctor’s ready to see you.” She said.

“Thank you.” I said turning and walking back to Clint but stopping when I saw who he was talking to. I was about to make a run to the restroom when it happened.

“Cal.” Bobbi greeted.

“Shit.” I whispered before putting a huge smile on my face. “Bobbi, what a surprise?!” I said and shot Clint a look.

“Just here for a check up.” She said rubbing her huge baby bump. “Just a few more weeks.”

“Congrats.” I said.

“Thanks. So you two finally going for it? You’re a little young don’t you think?” She said.

“Oh we’re not.” I said.

“Just friends.” Clint said.  

“So you just decided to come with your friend to visit her gynecologist?” Bobbi said.

“Miss Gerard, Mister Barton Doctor Lahiri is ready for your consult.” The nurse said.

“The fertility specialist?” Bobbi said shocked.

“Well we have to go.” Clint said getting up.

“Doctor’s waiting.” I said as Clint put an arm around my shoulders and ushered me away.

“Bye.” We said at the same time.

“Out of all the fertility specialists you had to get an appointment with the one who works at the same place as my ex wife’s OB?” Clint said in a low voice.

“I just picked the one with the highest rating on Yelp.” I said.

“How many starts did she have?” Clint asked before she walked in

“Miss Cal—Callioh…” She started. “Miss Gerard and Mister Barton, sorry to keep you waiting.” she said as she shook our hands.

“Thank you for squeezing us in on such short notice.” I said.

“Just doing my job.” She said. “Plus it’s not every day I get a request for a joint consult though I don’t think it’s really needed since you’re a couple…”

“We’re not.” I said.

“Just friends.” Clint said.

“Really?” She said looking at us and then looking at our joined hands. “Well, I’ve gone over your files and tests and you’re both in great health. Mister Barton,” She started.

“Clint’s fine.” Clint said.

“Callie or Cal is fine as well.” I said.

“Clint you’re in perfect shape and you’re clear of any STI’s so you can leave your sample downstairs today if you want.” Doctor Lahiri said.

“Today, really?” He said sounding hopeful.

“Yeah, men don’t have to wait for certain days of their cycle for egg extractions or even take hormone shots.” She said making me squeeze Clint’s hand. “Callie your tests came out clear and you came in at the perfect time. You’re cycle is about to start and we can start your treatment Today but first I need to know your plan.”

“My fertility plan?” I asked.

“Yes more specifically when do you plan on using your eggs?” She asked.

“Uh well, I’m nineteen right now. I’m probably going to graduate early and I’ve talked about maybe going to grad school with Tony and Bruce but I’m still not sure. Either way I’m thinking after I’m thirty, thirty five tops.” I said.

“Well eggs can last a really long time if their frozen. Over ten years but any longer than that and I recommend fertilizing before freezing.” She said.

“You mean like a sperm donor?” I asked.

“Yes. There is a sperm bank we work with, you could pick a donor or if there was a significant other or someone else you had in mind.” She said and I just squeezed Clint’s hand really tight but he didn’t say anything just moved his thumb in circles.

“We really are just friends.” I said.

“Of course but it wouldn’t be the first time a friend provided a sample. You don’t have to decide now but you should before your procedure. Frozen embryos have actually been recorded to last almost fifteen years, sometimes even more.” She said.

“I’m gonna need some time to think about that.” I said.

“Of course I’ll have Helen give you some catalogues on the way out. For now we should probably show you how to administer your hormone shots.” She said and I started squeezing even harder.

“Oh wow, Cal nails, nails!” Clint cried out.

“Sorry sorry.” I said loosening my grip and rubbing his hand.

“Guessing you’re not a fan of needles?” Doctor Lahiri said with an amused look.

“No.” I answered.

“Well it’s really important you get your shot at the same time everyday. We’re going to show you how to administer it but it would be easier if someone else did it” She said and I turned to Clint.

“Guess we’re both learning something new today.” Clint said.

“Would you like me to call ahead and let them know downstairs you’ll be down shortly?” She asked.

“Uh, actually can we hold off on that? I’m going to come back with Cal later, I can do it then.” Clint said.

“You sure?” I asked.

“Yeah, I hate waiting rooms it’ll give me something to do while you’re in.” He said giving me a reassuring smile.

About an hour and an injection later we were out of there.

“I’m heading home, I can take your…” Clint said looking at the pharmacy bag in my hand.

“Oh right, thanks.” I said. “Looks like I have a lot of studying to do.” I said looking at the catalogue of potential binders.

“Yeah.” He said awkwardly.

“I have to get going. I’ll see you later.” I said.

“Yeah.” He said. “You want me to drop those off too?”

“Uh yeah… if Tony sees this he’s going to put in his input and we won’t get any work done. Bucky’s getting discharged today and the guy’s been cooped up enough already.” I said.

“So Steve and Bucky are officially moving in this weekend?” Clint asked.

“Yeah, Steve already dropped off everything he was bringing with him, I cleaned out the fridge, made some space in the hall closet, cleared out a shelf in bathroom… you know the usual.” I said.

‘Should I… do anything?” Clint asked. 

“No just be your usual awesome self.” I said as my phone started ringing. “Crap now I really have to go. I’ll see you later.”

“I’ll grab dinner.” Clint said.

“Make sure it’s enough for four people, actually make it eight Steve and Bucky really pack it in.” I said. “I’ll grab dessert.”

“Looking forward to it.” he said about to turn away but hugging me. I smiled and hugged him back. “Thank for this.”

“Thanks for holding my hand through that entire thing and learning how to drug me.” I said.

“Anytime.” He said and we were off.

I got to the tower and went straight to the lab.

“Hey, sorry I’m late…” I said handing Bruce his latte.

“You’re on time.” Bruce said.

“Early is on time, on time is late.” I said putting Tony’s coffee down on the table in front of him.

“You’ve got to take it easy on yourself.” Tony said.

“My job isn’t to take it easy its to make your lives easy so you can keep being the kick ass scientists who are going to change the world.” I said.

“Well that’s not exactly why I hired you but you do do that.” Tony said. “So you ready for the big day?”

“Probably not as ready as Bucky.” I said.

“We should get down there.” Bruce said.

“Yup.” I said.

“Do we have anything else on the agenda for today?” Tony asked.

“Nope, you’re on for uninterrupted lab time.” I said.

“Pepper?” Tony asked.

“Shanghai until next week.” I said.

“No speaking commitments?” Tony asked.

“MIT commencement speech in two weeks… shit.” I said.

“Cal?” Bruce asked.

“What’d you forget?” Tony asked.

“My egg extraction. It would have to happen during finals week. Uh.” I groaned.

“So you’re going for it?” Tony asked.

“Yeah I got my first hormone shot forty five minutes ago.” I said. “I’m gonna make this work. Two of my finals are just essays that are halfway finished, the rest I can just move around. Take them earlier or maybe cram them all on the same day so I can finish early. I got this.”

“If you need to take some time off…” Tony started.

“Nope. I got this.” I said. “Now let’s go discharge my roommate.”

Later That Day-

“Knock knock.” I said opening the door to Clint’s apartment. “I brought dessert, Steve and Bucky should be here in twenty minutes, beer me.”

“You can’t drink until after the egg retrieval.” Clint said from the couch where he working on something on his laptop.

“Oh right, at least I still have coffee.” I said.

“One cup a day.” Clint said as he closed his laptop.

“You okay?” I asked.

“Yeah just thinking.” He said.

“You can do that? Wow.” I said sarcastically and he shot me his best bitch face.  “Penny for your thoughts?”

“Just some stuff at work.” Clint said. “Summer’s going to be busy.”

“Tell me about it. I’m working full time and I’m also traveling wherever Tony goes. So far he’s planning on spending a month in LA, a week in Tokyo, and stopping by Italy, and London.” I said.

“You’re going to be gone a while.” He said sounding glum.

“I’ll be going back and forth. I’ll still be around.” I said.

“Have you thought about… getting a donor?” Clint asked.

“Yeah. I mean it would give me more time, downside if I ever meet a guy I want to be with and I got cancer this would be how we had kids and I don’t know how they’d feel about not being the kid’s biological father. Then there’s also the fact that I have to pick out a donor which is good because I pick out the perfect one but I’d have to trust they didn’t lie on their application because I seriously doubt they run background checks on every single donor.” I said.

“Cal, whoever you end up with if he really loves you then he won’t care about DNA, he’ll care that he’s going to get the chance to raise an amazing kid with an even more amazing mom. And even if the donor ends up being some loser, is that going to change how much you’re going to love your kid?” Clint asked.

“No.” I said.

“Then you have nothing to worry about.” Clint said he said with a forced smile.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” I asked and he frowned. “Is this about Bobbi?”

“No, I wish we hadn’t run into her on our big day but I’m kind of glad we did. I’m moving on.” He said.

“And moving forward.” I said as we heard footsteps from the hallway.

“Guess that’s the roomies.” I said getting up. “Coming?”

 “Yeah.” He said.

We walked out and met up in the hallway with Steve and Bucky who had their hands full.

“Woah.” I said taking a few books off of Bucky’s pile.

“Thanks Doll.” He said.

“Door’s unlocked.” I told Steve.

“Oh.” Steve said opening it up. ‘We didn’t know if you needed anything so we brought drinks.”

“Awesome.” Clint said.

“I hope you guys like Chinese.” I said.

“Please tell me there are noodles.” Bucky said.

“Two large orders.” Clint said as we walked in. I quickly put down the books and picked up the sperm donor catalogues to put away. Not really a conversation to have the first night your roommates move in.

We had a really nice talk over dinner and I remembered what I missed most about not living alone.

Bucky and Steve called it an early night and after facetiming Nate who was away on another meet I headed back to Clint’s apartment with the sperm donor catalogues.

“So I’ve got Die Hard, Inception or The Dark Knight.” Clint said.

“And all I brought were these.” I said putting them down on the coffee table.

“Have you looked through them?” He asked.

“Not yet, want to help me pick out a baby daddy?” I asked.

“I’ve seen all of these before anyway.” He said grabbing a glass of orange juice. I raised an eyebrow. “We’re in this together Cal, you can’t drink so I can’t either.”

“I really wish we could drink, it’d make reading through all of these a bit more fun.” I said.

“We can still have fun.” He said opening up a binder. “Potential donor one, twenty six, did two years in the peace crops, doing this because he thinks children are our future.”

“cliché.” I said.

“Next.” Clint said flipping through to the next one.

We made it half way through with not even one maybe.

The Next Day-

“You’re so picky.” Clint said.

“It’s half of my future kid’s DNA.” I said.

“That has nothing to do with who they’ll be, that’s on you.” Clint said.

“You really want to start a nature versus nurture debate?” I said.

“Cal, most people just pick the best looking ones.” Clint said.

“Let’s see, the foot model Will hooked up with that one time in that club restroom.” I said.

“There’s to way to know for sure that was him.” Clint said.

“He had the same neck tattoo.” I said. “There’s also the dumb douche hedge fund manager who wanted to rent out the other room. No way he’s putting in DNA for my kid.”

“Okay there’s one more. The last one.” Clint said handing me a non laminated white piece of paper. I arched an eyebrow.

“Forty three year old, clean medical history, clean family medical history, works as a contractor likes hiking, going to the movies and… archery? Clint…” I started.

“Before you say anything hear me out. The one thing you keep coming back to that’s stopping you from picking any of these guys is that they’re random strangers. Which eliminates pretty much anyone already. You’re a big reason why I even considered freezing my sperm and even if I go through with it’s not a guaranteed I’ll meet someone at my age who wants to have a kid.” Clint said.

“So you’d settle for me?” I said

“No.” Clint said. “It wouldn’t be settling.”

“It really seems like you are.” I said.

“Don’t do that.” Clint said.

“It’s true.” I said.

“You’re overthinking it and twisting my words around. I know my options. I know I can do what you’re doing and find an egg donor and then hire a surrogate or I can look into fostering a kid but there’s a third option.” He said. “One that could help us both.”

“Clint it’s insane.” I said.

“Just think about it for a minute. Pretend you’ve never met me and I’m just another page in that book.” He said.

“But you’re not another page in that book, I actually know and love you.” I said.

“Which is why I said pretend.” He said.

“You know what I have to go to work.” I said getting up.

“Cal.” Clint started.

“Let’s just put this on hold.” I said. “We can talk about it later.”

“Cal.” He said as I walked out. I made it to the stairs when the alarm I had put on my phone went off to let me know it was time for my shot. I turned around and walked back into the apartment.

“It’s time for my shot.” I said going to the kitchen.

“I know.” Clint said coming over and taking the vial and syringe to prep everything. I undid my jeans and lowered them before closing my eyes and waiting for the pinch to be over. Once it was done I pulled my pants back up and turned to him.

“Now I need to go to work.” I said.

“We’re okay right?” Clint asked.

“We’re always okay.” I said before leaving.

Things were not okay, things were very not okay and it all blew up in our faces during Brunch.

I still had to get my shot but it would have to be while we were at Will and Josh’s place. I put the bottle and syringe in my purse. I’d go to the bathroom and Clint would make something up to go after me. We’d do it then.

Of course little did we know we’re not the only ones they invited over that day, Steve and Bucky came over as well.

 “So what’s up with you two, you look… off.” Will said.

“Work.” We answered at the same time.

“You know the rule, no shop talk.” Josh said as I looked at my phone under the table.

“Excuse me I need to use the ladies room.” I said getting up grabbing my purse with me.

I was in the bathroom for a few minutes before there was a knock at the door. I opened it and Clint came in.

“Have to make it quick, they know something’s up.” Clint said.

“So much for keeping this under wraps.” I said taking everything up.

“I thought we were okay.” Clint said.

“We are.” I said as he stuck the needle in me.

“Cal you’re making small talk with me. You didn’t even do that when we first met.” Clint said taking it out and putting everything away.

“You said to pretend I didn’t know you so that’s what I’m doing.” I said.

“I meant that…” He started.

What the hell are you two doing?” Will said coming in. My skirt was still down and Clint was still holding the syringe.

“Shit.” We said.

“Talk now!” Will said sternly.

“We’re considering having a baby together.” I blurted out before I realized what I had said.

“What!?” Will screamed.

“Babe what’s… whoa.” Josh said coming in.

“What do you mean you’re trying to have a baby together?!” Will screamed.

“What?!” Josh shouted.

“That came out wrong.” I said.

“No it’s actually kind of right.” Clint said.

“Not helping.” I said pulling up my skirt. “Guys lets just go sit down and we’ll explain.”

“You two are together.” Will said.

“No.” we answered.

“But you just said you’re trying to have a baby today?” Josh said.

“You’re having a baby?!” Steve and Bucky exclaimed with huge smiles on their faces.

“Not anytime soon. Okay we’re just going to give you the cliff notes version. I’m freezing my eggs. He’s freezing his sperm. I want to wait over ten years to have a kid so embryos last longer. I’m looking for sperm donors and Clint offered.” I said.

“You did?” Will asked.

“Yeah and Cal’s freaking out.” Clint said.

“Because it’s an insane idea.” I repeated.

“You don’t like any of the other donors in the catalogue.” Clint said.

“Yes because I’ve met two of them and they were both jackasses, I can only imagine the rest of them!” I said.

“So I’m a jackass?!” Clint yelled.

“No!” I said.

“Then why not go for it?” He asked.

“Because I don’t want you to settle.” I said.

“I’m not settling!” Clint exclaimed.

“Then why are you giving up!?” I shouted.

“I’m not giving up, I’m going for the best option I have!” Clint said.

“That’s freezing your sperm!” I said.

“You know that’s not true.” Clint said.

“Yeah I do. You can find someone Clint, or you can get an egg donor or a surrogate.” I said.

“But then I’d be right where you are trying to choose a complete stranger to put in half of my kid’s DNA.” Clint said.

“You don’t get to quote me to me.” I said.

“Fine you’re all about objective facts let’s start with how this affects us financially. I’d have to pay for storage, you’re paying for storage. We do this we can split the cost. Two, neither of us have to wonder about the mystery donor for our kids because I know you and you know me better than I do most days. Three, you’ve got the brains I’ve got the brawns, our kids could have both. No matter how you look at it this is perfect.” He said.

“Perfect? Okay, first off you know me and you know that I have a cancer gene so chances are that our kids would have that too.” I said.

“They can test for that and science is improving all the time.” Clint said. “What else do you have?”

“I’m not going to be ready to have kids until I’m at least thirty, you’d be in your mid fifties.” I said. “Would you really be okay with waiting that long? Or how about the fact that we’re not a couple. If I get married by husband would be the one raising your kid. Would you really be okay with that?”

“Cal, I want to be a dad but if it comes to that I’m okay with whoever you marry raising my kids.” Clint said.

“How can you be okay with that, this is your dream Clint?!” I shouted tearing up.

“Because it doesn’t matter who the guy is as long as you’re their mom!” he shouted. “You’re my best friend and I love you and I trust you more than anyone else. I know my kids would be okay because they’d have you.”

“What about me?” I asked.

“Cal, I’d be okay just being the fun uncle.” He said.

“But I wouldn’t because no one could ever compare to you.” I said. “You’d be the standard anyone I would ever be with would be compared to when they decided they were ready for kids and that would never happen. I love you and I can’t take that away from you.”

“Cal you…” he started when my phone started ringing.

I didn’t even check who it was before answering.

“Hello.” I said, my voice cracking a bit. “I’ll be there in thirty.” I answered before hanging up.

“I have to go.” I said grabbing my things.

“Cal…” Clint started.

“Thanks for brunch, I’ll call you later.” I told Will before putting on my sunglasses and walking out.

“Cal!” Clint called after me as I walked out without looking back.