Escapade
“You have that piece, right?” Gwen asks Flash.
“Yup. Here you go.” She says.
“And here’s mine.” He says, handing her his piece of the puzzle that they were both working on.
I simply stare at them as they are being friendly with one another.
They’re never this friendly when they are competing to finish a puzzle.
Nearly forty minutes later, Peter and my dad get back to the cabin.
“Hey! How did it go?” I ask.
“Oh, it went smoothly.” Peter responded snappishly.
As he moves to sit next my grandma –
Rip.
The ill-fitting pants rip.
Everyone looks at him.
“Uh-oh.” Flash says as he smirks.
Peter stands up as I cover my mouth with my hands, trying not to laugh.
My grandma is having a good time checking out Peter’s ass.
“My, my! Just like Ryan Philippe! What a nice, firm-”
“Grandma!” I exclaim as I am taking a peek at Peter’s ass as well.
It actually looks.....firm.
“Delores Lyman.” She says sticking out her hand towards Peter, smiling like Sylvester when he has “captured” Tweety Bird.
“Nice to meet you.” Peter says.
“Come on, bro.” Flash says. “I have some extra clothes that I can give you.” He says as he stands up.
“Thanks, man.” Peter says as he and Flash walk towards Flash’s room.
Gwen, my mom, my grandma and I start laughing like school girls as we check out Peter’s ass.
“I didn’t like those pants anyway.” My dad says. “But I do think that Christmas has came a couple days early for my son, don’t you think?”
I’m pretty sure that I start blushing like crazy.
“So how was it with Max?” I ask him.
“It wasn’t too bad considering our little mishap.” My dad says.
♂
Norman is driving down the road to the little gas store, humming along to Jingle Bells.
“Sing with me?” Norman asks.
Both men start singing Christmas songs for a while.
“So, what are your intentions for the new year that is coming?” Norman asks as he stops singing.
“I hope to get married.” Peter supplies happily.
“That is great!”
“It’ll be a summer wedding, with the honeymoon in the Bahamas.”
“That sounds really good. How many kids do you plan on having?”
“Either two or three. I haven’t really decided yet. I like the number two because it’ll even us out, but three seems like a better number because I always wanted a noisy house, plus three kids will fill up the back seat of a car.”
“That is certainly a plan.”
“What about you, Mr. Osborn?”
“Call me Norman or dad.” Norman says. “In college, I studied chemistry and electrical engineering. I met Emily while I was at college and we started going out. We got married a couple years later and she gave birth to Harry.”
“Wow. That’s great!” Peter says. “I wish I had married my college sweetheart.”
“What happened?”
“I left him after I found out that he cheated on me with on of my ex-girlfriends who got pregnant with his child, after she aborted our child.”
“I’m sorry about that.”
“I don’t worry about that anymore.”
“That’s great. Show the world that Peter Parker is a strong man who doesn’t take shit from people. We need more people like you in this world.”
“Thanks. So how did you build Oscorp?”
“In my adulthood, I got some help from one of my college professor’s, Mendel Stromm. He co-founds the firm Oscorp Industries and establishes myself as owner and president.”
“You could do that?” Peter asked in awe.
“It took a lot of work, but it’s possible. I’m getting ready to retire, so I’m just waiting on Harry to take over for me. I am ready to spend a lot more time with my beautiful wife.”
They stop at the little mart where Harry put gas in his car.
Peter jumped out of the car once Norman cut the engine off.
“Yes! I’m gonna be saved!” Peter quietly tells himself as he makes his way into the shop.
“Calm down, son!” Norman chuckles.
“Sir, you have to help me.” Peter tells the old man who gave Harry the fuzzy handcuffs. “I have been kidnapped.”
“Let me take a wild guess.” The old man says as he gets out of his seat. “By that handsome young man in the red Christmas sweater?”
“Yes!” Peter exclaimed as Norman entered the shop. “Thank God you remember!”
“And he handcuffed you and blind folded you.”
“Yes, that’s exactly what happened!”
“And he asks you to spank him while you do naughty things to him in bed, right?” The old man says suggestively as he starts thrusting his hips in the air.
“That’s just disgusting.” Peter says, disturbed by the old man’s actions.
“Canola oil.” Norman says.
Peter looks at him quizzically as he notices the items in Norman’s arms.
“I grabbed a bottle of rum, a six pack of root beer, a bag of chips tortilla chips with some salsa and a bag of barbecue Lays. Oh, damn! I forgot the lube!” Norman says. “While I’m at it, I’ll grab the extra virgin olive oil. Em’s favorite oil.”
‘Like father, like son.’ Peter thinks to himself as he looks the items on the counter.
“What does that even mean? How can something or someone be extra virgin?” Norman asks the older man.
“Beats me, but I know that I’m not a virgin!” The old man jokes and Norman laughs.
“That’s a good one!” Norman says. “Well, the wifey loves to have everything lathered up in oil. Luckily for me, I don’t have a problem with that.”
“Have I seen you somewhere around here before?” The man asks.
“No, but you’ve probably seen my son with this young man here.” Norman says as he puts his hand on Peter’s shoulder.
“That’s why you’re so familiar!” The old man says. “I gave him some fuzzy handcuffs when he and this young man came through yesterday. Your son was going to tie this man up and have a passionate time.”
“You have anymore handcuffs?” Norman asks.
“Last pair.” The man says.
“I’ll take ‘em.” Norman says with glee.
The man rings the items up and puts them in a bag.
“Thank you. Merry Christmas.” Norman says.
“Likewise.” The man says.
After they were done, Norman and Peter leave the shop and head to the car.
Suddenly, Peter runs back inside.
“Listen old man! I am not leaving until you help me! I’m gonna jump over this damn counter and use that phone!”
The old man pulls out his rifle.
“You won’t be causing any trouble here, you nut!” The old man exclaims. “Now back that ass up, nice and slow.”
Peter huffs and leaves the shop.
♂
“So, how did-” Peter asks before he reaches over the console and begins steering the wheel.
Both men start to yell and scream as the car is going out of control on the empty road.
They hit a cat that’s crossing the road.
The car violently swerves from left and right as Peter yells-
“Let go, Norman! I gotta get out of here!”
Suddenly, Norman puts an arm around Peter’s neck.
“Calm down, son!”
“I just want to go home!” Peter chokes out.
“Trust me, I know.” Norman supplies. “It’s simply best to remember that when you get married, it’s going to be an 80/20 relationship. They’ll be many good times when you’re married, and other times, it’ll pass.” Norman finishes as he lifts his arm from Peter’s neck.
Peter coughs violently.
“You have a tight grip.” He says after he stops coughing.
“Don’t you forget it.” Norman says. “If you harm my little boy, it’ll be a lot worse than this.”
♂
“You hit a cat?” I asked.
“Well, I was going to find the owners, but had I done that, the police would’ve thought that I was selling pussy.” Norman snorts.
“Daddy!”