June 22nd.
Phil Coulson had no idea why, but that day had always felt weird to him. Like it was special for some reason, but there was no reason at all. It wasn’t his birthday, nor was it someone else’s. It wasn’t a holyday, it wasn’t S.H.I.E.L.D. related.
It was nothing, yet Phil couldn’t help it. On that day he had always felt happy, as if he had to celebrate it, so he had done it with the rest of the team. They had visited Rome the previous year, China two years before, they had swam with turtles three years before.
This year Daisy was visiting Cal (even though he didn’t remember her she still went to see him every now and then), Fitzsimmons were looking for a house to move in together and Mack and Yo-yo were on a mission in Colombia.
It was just May and him, but it didn’t mean they couldn’t have fun.
Melinda May was sitting in the cockpit staring at the clouds. It was June 22nd. 25 years today.
She sighed as she let those memories flash in front of her eyes once again.
“What was it? Mission number 21?” Melinda asked as she literally collapsed onto the car seat.
“22. And we were only at 17 a month ago. Guess our enemies are growing every day.” Said Phil taking a sit next to Melinda.
He turned to her and said “Thank you for saving my life once again by the way.”
Melinda grinned. “It was a pleasure. I don’t really like the idea of being given a new partner when you die.” she teased.
“If you keep fighting like that I don’t think I’ll be dying anytime soon.” He smiled
There was a pause, the Melinda turned to look outside the window and said “I really don’t want anything to happen to you Phil.” She sighed. “This is why they teach us to control our feelings.”
“Come on, we crossed that bridge years ago.” Said Phil getting closer to her.
She turned around to face those big blue eyes looking at her- she knew that look far too well. That look had already fooled her many times.
She shook her head, her lips forming a soft pout.
“We’ve talked about this, Phil.”
“About what?”
“About us. We can’t. It’s too risky.”
“We are always risking our lives, Mel. What’s a risk more?” he said leaning even closer but not daring anything other than that.
She didn’t bother being that close to him. “We could make a mistake.” She said.
“You could never be a mistake.”
“How do you know?”
“Because I-“
“Don’t.”
“But-“
“Don’t say it, Phil. If it is true, please, I beg you. Don’t say it out loud. It would be too painful.”
“It doesn’t need to be painful, it has to be beautiful.”
Melinda tried to resist. It wasn’t like she didn’t feel the same, but their job wasn’t really suitable for a relationship. But Phil, oh Phil. The first time they kissed he gave her shivers, made her feel on cloud nine. Then again, she had rejected him. But he hadn’t given up. Since that time, it had happened a few times more, but that was it. They kissed, they cuddled, then they separated. It was best for the both of them not to engage in a more serious thing. But she couldn’t deny she wanted it too.
“What if something went wrong?”
“What could possibly go wrong?”
“You can’t know.”
“Neither can you, so..” he gave her a soft smile, closed the last gap between the two of them and let her head rest on his shoulder.
“So what?”
“So marry me, Melinda May” He said as she lifted her head in shock. He had no idea why, but he had felt the need to say it. He loved her, truly, and he couldn’t imagine his life without her, so screw it, might as well give it a shot.
“Marry me even though I don’t have a ring. Marry me because I love you, you get it? I love you and you can’t stop me from telling you, from telling the most beautiful woman I know. Marry me because in this uncertain life we live you are my only certainty. Marry me, so I don’t have to go a single day more pushing away my feelings. Marry me and make me the happiest man on Earth. Marry me, and take this one more risk with me.”
He said in a rush, as if all the things he had always wanted to tell her had escaped from his brain all of a sudden.
Melinda stared at him, she didn’t know what to do or what to say. She wanted to fight it, she wanted to pretend, she wanted to get out of that car. But she didn’t. For the first time in her life Melinda May surrendered to her feelings. “Of course I will marry you, Phil. Of course I will.”
She wiped away the tears as she heard footsteps approaching beside her.
“May” Phil called entering the cockpit. “Fitzsimmons are not coming back today, so it’s just the two of us.”
Melinda looked at him nodding. “So, I was wondering.. how about we dine out? We could land in Malibu since we’re close and stay there for the day, then have dinner. What do you say?”
“What’s the special occasion?” she asked with a smirk, but she wasn’t really in the happiest mood. Out of all the places, why Malibu?
“I just feel like relaxing. I don’t know what with June 22nd but I’ve always wanted to celebrate it.”
Melinda almost chocked when she heard him say it. Then she remembered. Ever since the accident, as she liked to call it, they had done weird thing on June 22. He had no idea of what it was but he still celebrated it. In a way, she thought, it was still their special day.
“I’ll fly us to Malibu then” she said changing her route.
“Great, see you in a bit.”
May inserted the coordinates. Half an hour later, she could see Malibu being closer every second.
She lost herself in her thoughts once again.
They had decided to get married on that very month, June. They chose June 22 because of their twenty second mission, the one that had brought them together.
It was really a quick thing, the two of them, Nick Fury and Natasha Romanoff. They hadn’t really had much time, they just went to the first chapel they had found. They had landed because Nick had to meet some men who could possibly own a 0-8-4. In Malibu.
As soon as they landed Phil and Natasha had gone buying the rings and Melinda had booked a table at a small restaurant just to give the impression of an actual wedding.
Nick insisted the newly married couple stayed there some time more and when they had denied being in need of some alone time, he had given the order to stay there and spend the night together. He would have collected them the following evening.
It was a really romantic restaurant Melinda had found. The moment they sat down at their table, it felt like the whole world had disappeared and it was just the two of them. Sitting one in front of the other on that amazing beach, drinking champagne and holding hands, it was finally a dream come true. A dream they both had dreamed for so long but had been too afraid to chase.
“Malibu is such a magical place, isn’t it?” he said.
A seagull was passing by and Melinda threw it some bread. It was so normal, so worriless.
Phil looked at her and smiled. He had married the most amazing woman in the world, and nothing could ever change that.
They landed in Malibu. As soon as they stepped out of the BUS, Melinda started to shiver. She was never the one to show her emotions, but it was too much. That place had hosted the most beautiful day of her life, and now it only made her feel sick.
If she could change one thing in her life, she would never marry Coulson again. She wouldn’t even meet him if possible. Losing him had been terrible, a nightmare, the most painful thing she had ever come to face.
“We know a way to bring him back” Fury had said. “But he might lose some memories.”
Some memories. Their memories. Coulson had lost memory of anything that had happened in his life and that was not S.H.I.E.L.D. related. He didn’t remember his father, if not for the day he had let him join the Academy. He remembered all of their missions, but there was it. He didn’t remember their conversations, the house they shared, their first holyday alone. He didn’t remember her. To him, she was Agent May, not Melinda, not his wife.
Damned T.A.H.I.T.I project. Her husband lived in the same plane as she and she couldn’t even kiss him or hold him in her arms.
“May, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Where are we headed to?”
“I was thinking we could go walking on the shore” he grinned like a child. Phil Coulson loved walking on the shore.
They spent the day walking around like tourists. Despite everything, May was still glad they were being together and having fun.
“May, look at that place.” Coulson said pointing a small restaurant not very far from them. “How about we stop there?”
It couldn’t be. Why was fate being so cruel to her? How was it possible he had chosen that one restaurant out of the thousand restaurants in town? She wanted to say no, but the look in his eyes made her heart melt.
Phil Coulson had the power to make her feel powerless even when he didn’t want to. How could one disappoint those sparkling blue eyes? The eyes that once looked at her in the same way, were now looking at that small restaurant and Melinda could never let that sparkle fade away.
She took a deep breath and nodded.
They were sitting there, on the beach, one in front of the other. The waiter had put a rose and two candles on the table.
Of course they did look like a married couple, she thought.
Phil had laughed at the thing, finding it funnier than it should have been.
They ate and talked about how Daisy was getting better at controlling her powers and how he would have liked Fitzsimmons to get married.
Phil ordered some pie and two glasses of champagne.
Melinda couldn’t help but smile. It felt so surreal but yet it was such a warm and calming atmosphere.
A seagull passed by and Melinda threw it some bread.
Phil looked at her and then he saw it. Their mission, he proposing to her, their wedding, the beach.
He remembered it all know. He had this huge smile stuck on his face, and Melinda noticed.
“What is it Phil?”
“It’s June 22.” He said with tears in his eyes.
“Coulson, you’re worrying me. What’s wrong?” she said alarmed
“It’s June 22. And it’s our anniversary.”
Melinda stared at him, her eyes filling with tears.
“You remember?” she managed to whisper before starting to sob
“I do. I have no idea why I forgot the happiest day of my life, but now I do remember it.” He said standing up and walking to his wife. Wife. God, it felt so strange to have a wife once again.
Melinda stood up and took his hands. “A lot happened after Loki hit you, you lost most of your memories and..”
“How could I forget about you? You must have hated me..”
“I could never hate you Phil. It hurt, but I never left your side. I might not have been your wife anymore, but I was still faithful to my promise.”
“I knew June 22 had something with it. That’s why I kept being happy on this day. Some part of me must have never forgotten the happiness you gave me” he said, bringing his hands to her face to wipe away her tears.
“I still can’t believe you remember.”
“I do. And I’m not going to forget it again.” He said, and with that, he kissed her.
Melinda had missed the delicate taste of his lips on hers, the shivers he gave her, the burning feeling in her veins. She kissed him and it felt like nothing had ever happened to them.
Malibu is such a magical place.