A Broken Kiss pt.2
“So you're leaving?” Sophie's face was getting colder and the blue in her eyes more pronounced by the red rim that was starting to form.
Karen was still silent and hadn't spoken since she saw the bag, he looked to her for help explaining this- but found none. “Soph…. I'm feeling better, I'm not hurt anymore. I gotta- I gotta go home.”
“Home. To your house.” She stood and Frank thought the girl might try to rush him, “I think I'm tired, I don't want to watch a movie. I'm gonna go to bed.”
She didn't look at him as she went over to Karen for a kiss goodnight, then walked towards Karen's bedroom and slammed the door closed.
Silence.
Frank heard himself swallow.
Then his heartbeat in his ears.
All he could do was wait for Karen to yell at him for telling Sophie like that.
He waited.
In silence.
Then she spoke, “So beer? Wine? Both? I think both.”
That's it? That's all she’s gonna say? Frank watched her walk over to the fridge and get the whole six pack out, then two wine glasses and a bottle of red. She walked right past him and put the drinks on the coffee table, before moving his duffle off the couch and attaching a plastic bag to the side, all so she could sit comfortably. Didn't even say anything, just uncorked the bottle and poured herself a generous cup- and gulped half of it down. Slowly he stood up and edged his way closer to the other side of the couch- afraid to break the silence.
And that's what it was- silent.
Then she picked up the remote and turned on some random channel, and stared at the screen. She wasn't even really looking at what was on the screen, she just didn't want to look at him, not until she had a little more liquid courage. So he did the same and grabbed a beer, following her lead.
It was almost an hour of silence and drinking, silent drinking- an awful combination.
“I never thought I wanted kids, not after what happened to my brother.” It came out of nowhere, not the conversation he was thinking they would have. “I thought what's the point of loving something like that and losing it- what's the point in feeling that kind of love? And i'm not talking the fall in love kind of love, but the love that's ingrained in you the minute their born. The kind you have no control over…”
He looked over at her, and saw tears in her eyes- almost coming down, still staring at the tv.
“I thought that I understood you- that I understood loss. And maybe I do, a bit. But jesus, Frank-” She finally looked at him, and he saw the look of pain in her eyes that he felt most days.
“When you brought her here, I felt a lot of things- sad that she had to go through this, angry at what her father had done, and happy- fucking happy that you killed him for it. I felt a lot for her. But it wasn't until we were in the station that I knew, with her clutching onto me like her life depended on it- screaming after me when I had to leave her that I knew I loved her. That kind of love that felt like it was always there, that I was born to love her, to save her.” He knew where this was going, and he was close to tears himself.
“And that's when I knew I never understood you, not really. I couldn't, I'm not even sure if I do now- Because i've loved her for a few months….. But you- had years. God….. I'm- I'm so sorry Frank.” She rushed forward a hug that ambushed him. She sobbed into his shoulder, he cried into her neck.
Frank couldn't tell you how long they sat there like that, he’d soaked her shirt, she slipped her fingers through his short hair- they both pulled back and rested their foreheads together. Eyes closed, tears all over both their faces.
He couldn't tell you who leaned in first, how it started- but then they had kissed. A sweet kiss, wet from their tears, a messy kiss. One of them had a runny nose though he didn't know who, a sticky kiss. He could taste the wine on her lips, a heady kiss. It was quick, no tongue. Messy, it was them. A broken kiss. That broke their hearts and healed them at the same time. That changed everything. That changed nothing. A beautiful kiss.
After that one moment that happened in a second, but felt like a lifetime- she rested her head on his shoulder. For who knows how long, all he felt were her even breaths that told him she had fallen asleep, so he scooped up her long body and walked to her bedroom. The room was silent except for Sophie’s quiet snores, Frank tucked Karen in and got up. He cleaned the living room, threw out the empty bottles, got a cup of water and a bottle of Advil. Frank put them on the bedside table beside her sleeping head, and did what she did all those days ago- placed a kiss on both his girls heads.
Picked up his bag, and told himself he was only keeping the key so he could lock up- thought about taking Duck then immediately saying no, Duck wanted to be here and wouldn't leave unless he dragged him. Duck was home. Frank looked at the clock, wanting to know the exact time he left this perfect place- one twenty two in the morning.