Nope.
Fury is infuriating (try saying that five times fast). Nothing new there but he crossed a line. A line that didn’t exist until 4 hours ago. The entire team was fuming, and in a few cases, grumbling.
Just what was that line? That line was hiring a shrink for the team. The initial thoughts of the team go like this:
Great, thanks, now, just how fast can I make them quit? I’m guessing 12 hours.
Finally, that type of doctor.
Nope.
Ha! A joke, I didn’t think you could make those, Fury.
As for the second thoughts, well, the colorful language that the team used, if spoken out loud, would have Steve in a coma within the first ten words.
Hold on. Let’s start in very beginning, five hours earlier. When the team first got a message saying to meet Fury in the conference room, they thought they were going to get yelled at again for some reason.
Clint thought it was because he kept spying on everyone from the vents, while Steve thought it was because he kept breaking the punching bags and no matter how long he spend trying to clean it up there was always some amount left over.
Natasha thought her cache of knives and guns had been found, but she wasn’t going to be guilted over it, no one was using that ceiling panel anyway... Or that one either.
Tony… well, Tony’s Tony, he wasn’t really expecting to be called out, after all, if anyone thought he could be guilt tripped after some odd years of working together, they were sorely mistaken, he was Tony fucking Stark.
Bruce was grumbling slightly about having to cut his meditation short for the day but he didn’t do anything wrong, per say.
So they, slowly, ever so slowly, dragged their feet into the conference room, one by one. Tony was the last one, he santered in, already pouring a glass of whiskey for himself. Finally, when he sat down, Fury cleared his throat and stood.
“Now that Mr. Stark has finally graced us with his presence-”
“You’re welcome.” Tony said, smiling as he propped his feet up on the table and sipped his drink.
“We can get down to business. As you all know, after battles, the team is all a bit… tense.” He moved to the door, “and so I took the liberty of finding the best physical therapist and therapist in general there is. Doctor Charlie Greanum.” He cleared his throat, expecting someone to walk through the door, instead a scuffle is heard and then a thud and a yelp.
A few seconds later, a small woman with copper ringlets walked through the door, hopping on one foot. “Nick! Ya told me no big entrances!” her voice was distinctly southern.
The team was shocked either from the fact that someone just called Fury by his first name or by the fact that Fury just gave them a therapist. Fury chuckled, “did you expect anything different?”
Again the team, who were just starting to recover from their initial shock, were stunned into silence. Did Fury… just… joke… with someone and… chuckle?
The woman, grinned, before moving towards Tony, extending her arm to shake. “Nice ta meet y’all, it’s a pleasure.” Tony slowly recovered, taking her offered hand in a handshake.
She moved to one team member to the next, shaking their hands and grinning. Fury took control of the conversation again, “Charlie here will work with all of the team and help you with any issues you might have.”
“Hold on, am I the only one who has a problem with this?”
Charlie spoke up, her voice soft, “the only mandatory thing you have to do with me is the physical therapy, the rest is just there if you want it.”
Tony decidedly ignored her, “giving us a shrink, Fury? You can’t handle the heat?”
“No, I’m perfectly fine with the temperature, it’s you who needs help, all of you.” and with that Patchy the Pirate walked out of the room, his cape flapping dramatically behind him.
And so the team of misfits, billionaires, scientists, and assassins, watched as Charlie ran out after Fury with a huff.
Steve, thanks to his superhuman hearing, and Clint, who not so subtly adjusted his hearing aids,
heard very faintly, a southern accent start to scold Fury.
“Nicholas Joseph Fury! That was extremely uncalled for!” followed by a small scuffle and a barely there yelp.
“My ear is not for pulling!”
“Stop whining you, crybaby.” Steve nearly choked on the sip of water he had just taken, as he and Clint stared at each other then back to the open door. Charlie was either fearless or just stupid. Most likely both.
They group watched as Charlie entered the room, and paused, looking back at the open door with her arms crossed. A second later Fury followed, as he glowered at Charlie. “Dr. Greanum here is only required to do physical therapy with you, should you need it.”
Charlie looked pleased, smiling at the scowl on Fury’s face, “that wasn’t so hard.”
Fury huffed, before leaving again. There was a moment of silence before Charlie cleared her throat. “I understand if none of you trust me. Hopefully I won’t be needed much. I need to go help Mr. Maximoff.”
She walked out of the room, leaving the team blinking in shock at what just happened in the span of five minutes.
“I like her.” Clint declared standing up and leaving the room.