eighty-three.
Bucky walked into Peter's little space in the MedBay and sighed, seeing the small boy just staring at the small photo he held in his hands. He wasn't going to ask, and he wasn't going to push. He was going to sit quietly next to Peter's bed and just be there for him, no matter what. But as a surprise, Peter spoke first.
"I don't want to get rid of it." He whispered.
Bucky felt shocked, but he just nodded, smiling softly when Peter looked up at him over the edge of the paper. "Okay, Petey."
"Okay? You're not gonna tell me I shouldn't keep it?"
Bucky shook his head and scooted closer to Peter's bed. "Not at all. Pete, that's not my place. If you want to keep it, then I'm here to help you. If you don't want to keep it, I wouldn't try and make you. That's not my place."
Peter nodded and looked back to the photo. Bucky waited a moment before speaking again. "Should I call Wade?"
Peter shook his head and put the photo down. "No. I'm gonna do this myself. I need space. I can't be near Wade right now, I just wanna do this on my own for a while. We're not together, I'm not obligated to call him or include him in anything like this. He's not the father, it's not his business."
Bucky nodded. He understood. "Okay. Okay, I'll help you. I'll be right here every step of the way, Peter."
The boy smiled up at his father. "I know you will."
They both knew that it was nothing they could promise. There was no guarantee that nothing would happen to them. But for now, they could pretend.
Just a couple of days later, Peter was able to leave the MedBay and go home... Well, as home as their new place could be. They lived in a tall building near the palace and their own floor was near the top of the building. It was pretty damn nice. A kitchen, a bathroom, a room for each of them, plus they were even allowed to have a pet if they wanted to, which was nice. Peter said he wanted a goat, and Bucky said he'd look into it.
Peter sat down on the bed in his room. Nothing in this room was his, nothing made this feel like a home. On the wall was an empty corkboard with some pins though, so Peter pinned up the ultrasound photo and then sat back down. This was gonna be a lot to get used to, that was for sure.
He looked towards his window. He wondered what he might need to make this place seem more like home. The walls and windows were bare, and the bed had a nice looking blue duvet on it. The furniture was all the same dark wood and there was a comfy looking rocking chair in the corner.
Peter touched his flat stomach and thought about how in a few short months he'd be a parent, and the thought took its toll immediately, scaring him to the point of tears. He was still so young, how could he be a parent? How could he be a good parent at that? He'd never even had parents before!
He didn't want to ruin the child's life. Would putting it up for adoption be better for it? Surely someone else out there in the world was better suited to be a parent. Surely there was someone more prepared than he was.
For fuck's sake, the baby's father was a murderer, a kidnapper, a rapist, and a fucking Hydra agent... But if he put the child up for adoption and Hydra came after them... The baby wouldn't be nearly as protected. Keeping it seemed to be the best option, despite all of Peter's other thoughts about the situation. But he didn't want this, he knew that. Everyone knew that. He said he'd keep it but how could he?
His hands trembled. His body shook. He stood, hands pressed against his flat stomach as his nails dug into his skin. It was like something inside of him wanted him to rip the baby out with his bare hands.
He didn't know what was wrong with him but he couldn't get rid of the thought of tearing his stomach open with his nails. "Dad!"
He heard loud footsteps and then Bucky was there in the doorway. "Peter? What's going on?"
Peter, shaking and afraid, didn't know what to do. "Hit me!"
"What?"
"Hit me like you did when I was shot!"
And Bucky, who was now worried as hell and still down an arm had to think quickly because he could see the boy's hands and Peter needed his help so he'd do what he had to do. He moved like a flash and trapped Peter against the bed with his leg and brought his hand down on Peter's shoulder. The boy knocked out like a light and fell like a sack of potatoes against Bucky's leg.
Bucky was lucky to be so strong because he lifted the boy up with his only arm and managed to tuck him into bed. He'd put in a call to the resident doctors, and then to Strange. Because as much as he wanted to trust the people here in Wakanda, it'd be nice to have the opinion of a friend too.