Bogey
Monitors displaying a radar and a blinking red dot travelling along it are shown, accompanied by the confused muttering of military personnel.
One soldier leans over the desk, looking at the screen, then to the man sitting at the desk, "What the hell was that? Were we cleared to go in there?"
“Oh I remember this.” sighs Rhodey, shaking his head slightly.
The younger man shakes his head, "No sir, they were using human shields. We never got the green light."
The camera quickly pans up to one man, who is clearly in charge, talking into his mic, "Patch me through to state, they're going to be all over this."
“They didn’t know you were there.” Thor realised. Loki chuckled,
“Maybe he will get blasted out of the air.” Tony glared at the smirking god.
"Get those monitors up!" Someone shouts from across the room.
"We got a bogey," the man at the desk says, reaching for the phone beside him as his free hand types on the keyboard.
"Wasn't AirForce!" One soldier provides.
The man in charge is clearly getting frustrated at this point as he asks, "We got the CIA on the line?"
"I've got Langley on the line; they want to know if it's us."
"No, it is definitely not us, sir," the soldier at the desks answers.
"It wasn't Navy," another shouts.
"Wasn't marines!"
“Well, you’re screwed,” said Quill matter of factly.
“You have no faith in Starks awesome technology.” snorted Rocket.
“Thanks for the vote of confidence guys.” Tony groaned.
"I need answers," the one in charge says, "Can I please get eyes on target?" A brief shot of the room at large reveals that they are no closer to getting the answers they need, so the man adds, "Get me Colonel Rhodes from weapons development down here now!"
“Go Rhodey!” cheered Tony.
“You are a child.” Rhodey rolled his eyes.”
“Excuse me?” Tony gave him a look of mock offence. “I am an immature adult thank you very much.”
“Of course. I had forgotten.”
Tony is shown shooting through the sky again, simply minding his own business before the shot returns to the base once more, just as Rhodes is walking in.
“Must you do everything to Rock and Roll.” Wong sighed, “You are far too much like Strange.” Stephen looked at his friend, raising an eyebrow.
“I don’t do everything to Rock and Roll.”
“I beg to differ.”
“I do some things to Rock. But then it is mostly Pink Floyd.”
“Nice.” complimented Tony and Quill in unison. Stephen nodded once.
“Why exactly did we start talking about music again?” Gamora asked wearily.
We ran an ID check and cross-referenced with all known databases. We have nothing," the leader says as the Colonel approaches.
"Any high altitude surveillance in the region?" He asks, and one man answers.
"We got an AWOK and a Global Hawk in the area."
Rhodes brow furrows in confusion as he studies the screen, "So this thing just appeared out of nowhere?" He stands a bit straighter as he addresses the room, "How come it didn't show up on the radar?"
“Because I’m too awesome,” Tony said immediately
“Or you’re just too small.” corrected Natasha.
"Got a minimal radar cross-section, sir," is the soldier at the desk's response.
Rhodey is clearly getting frustrated at this point, but his voice never shows it, "Is it stealth?"
“Oh crap!” Tony clapped a hand to his forehead. “I forgot to add the retroreflective panels!”
“Seriously?” half the room sighed (the non-science people)
“Too bad there isn’t a lab in here for you to work yourself to death.” teased Rhodey.
“Oh hush honey bear.” sulked Tony.
"No sir," the same man says, "it's... tiny. We think it's an unmanned aerial vehicle."
“Wrong.” Vision stated calmly.
"Colonel," the soldier in charge lowers his voice to ask, "what are we dealing with here?"
“Awesomeness.”
“Tony, we get you’re awesome. Can you not point it out every minute?” Bruce grimaced.
Contemplating his answer for a minute, James lowers his head, "Let me make a call."
“You know me so well.” Tony smiled at Rhodey.
“I know you’re idiocy in regards to Government laws so well.” corrected Rhodey.
Back in the air, the sound of a cell phone ringing can be heard from the suit.
"Hello," Tony answers nonchalantly.
"Tony?"
"Who's this?" Tony's voice can be heard over the colonel's receiver.
"It's Rhodes."
"Sorry, hello?" the billionaire asks again, the HUD in his suit clearly showing a picture of the Colonel.
“Is this really the time to mess with him?” Scott questioned.
“It’s always the time to mess with him,” Tony smirked at an unamused Rhodey.
"I said it's Rhodes."
"Speak up please," Tony teases.
"What in the hell is that noise?" the colonel responds, clearly annoyed at this point.
"Oh, yeah, I'm driving with the top down," he lies easily.
“Right of course.”
"Yeah, well I need your help right now."
"It's funny how that works, huh?" Tony says, alluding to their earlier conversation at the base.
“Asshole.” Tony glared at Rhodey.
“Sorry.” Rhodey looked sheepish.
"Yeah," he ignores the half-hearted jab, and continues on, "Speaking of funny, we've got a weapons depot that was just blown up a few clicks from where you were being held captive."
"Well, that's a hot spot," the genius answers quickly, "Sounds like..." he takes a deep breath, "someone stepped in and did your job for you, huh?"
“That isn’t obvious at all.” Clint rolled his eyes.
"Why do you sound out of breath, Tony?" Rhodey inquires, clearly suspicious now.
"I'm not, I was just jogging in the canyon," he explains.
“Yes, since you always do that.”
On his head, Rhodes nods and corrects his friend, "I thought you were driving."
"Right... I was driving to the canyon... where I'm going to jog."
“So much for being a good liar.” chuckled Sam.
“Hey, you try lying to Rhodey! It’s surprisingly hard.” Tony insisted.
“Why did you have to lie exactly?” Steve raised his eyebrows.
“I don’t know sometimes people just lie.” snapped Tony automatically. Steve winced and an awkward silence filled the cinema as the film resumed.
"You sure you don't have any tech in that area I should know about?"
"Nope!"
"Bogey spotted!" one soldier updates the room at large.
"Whiplash, come in hot," another says.
"Okay, good," the colonel says, turning to face the monitor, "'cause I'm staring at one right now, and it's about to be blown to kingdom come."
In the air, two jets approach the suit from behind.
“Just like that?” Peter broke the silence, looking worried.
“I’m okay spiderling. Just the government being idiots like usual.” Tony smiled slightly at the teen.
"That's my exit," Tony glances back at them, before rolling off to the side.
“Your suits have excellent mobility,” commented T’challa.
“Especially since they used to be so… heavy,” smirked Shuri.
“They have greatly improved since.” Tony pointed out to the Princess.
The Jets follow suit, going after the unknown aircraft.
The camera shows the view from the cockpit of one of the jets, but the suit is hard to make out from the repulsor glare. "Ballroom, this is whiplash one, I've got the bogey in my sights," the first pilot informs.
"Whiplash one, what is it?" Rhodes asks.
“Me you idiot,” muttered Tony.
“You said yourself that it wasn’t.” Drax gazed at the genius.
"I've got no idea."
"Do you have radio contact?" the man in charge questions.
"Nonresponsive, sir."
"Then you are clear to engage."
Through the HUD of Tony's suit, just above the horizon line, are the words, 'ENGAGE; SUPERSONIC FLIGHT'.
“Nice.”
"Hit it," Tony commands, and the suit shoots forward.
"Bogey just went supersonic!" one pilot reports. "I got a lock!" He then proceeds to hit a button and a missile shoots out from beneath the jet.
“Is it normal to get a lock that fast after going supersonic?” asked Bruce curiously.
“Just good weaponry,” answered Rhodey.
"Inbound missile," JARVIS informs his creator.
"Flares!" he shouts in response, and the flares deploy, blowing up the missile and sending him tumbling forward in a burst of fire.
“Yikes.” yelped Scott.
The pilots dodge the explosion, continuing their pursuit of the aircraft.
"Wait a second- Bogey deployed flares!" one pilot shouts, as it cuts to a shot of Tony trying to regain his flight as he falls through the air.
He struggles a bit longer, but eventually, he levels out and shoots past the screen, the Jets not far behind.
“This is why I added those flight stabilizers.” Tony looked pointedly at Rhodey.
“Hey, I didn’t say you didn’t need them. I just said they make you look like a messed up butterfly.” Rhodey defended. Tony scoffed, not answering.
One of the pilots gets a lock on the suit again and starts firing shots. Tony grunts as they impact the suit and tries to manoeuvre out of the line of fire. When that doesn't work, he shouts, "Deploy flaps!"
The flaps in the back of the suit fly open, slowing his forward momentum and allowing the jets to pass him.
"Holy-" curses one pilot as they both watch the suit fly past them.
“Awesome.”
Back in the base, one soldier reports, "That thing just jumped off the radar, sir. The sat visual has been lost.
"No way that's a UAV," one of the pilots deducts, still glancing around for sight of the suit.
“Now you get that,” Tony said crossly.
"What is it?" the man in charge says.
Still looking around, the pilot shakes his head, "I can't see anything."
"Whatever it was, it just bought the farm," the other pilot decides. "I think bogey's been handled, sir."
Rhodey is slightly more at ease, but clearly not convinced as he stares at the radar. His attention is only drawn from it when his personal cell phone starts to ring. He looks down at the caller ID.
“Starkster?” chuckled Tony, amused.
“Don’t worry, I changed it to Tony Stank.” Rhodey assured him in an incredibly serious voice.”
Rhodey glances around the room before turning his back and answering the phone, "Hello?"
"Hi," Tony answers quickly, even more out of breath, "Rhodey, it's me."
"It's who?"
“Really?” Natasha rolled her eyes. “You are so…” she sighed. Tony smirked slightly.
"I'm sorry, it is me. You asked, what you're asking about is me..." he trails off, taking a deep breath.
"No, see, this isn't a game. You do not send civilian equipment into my active war zone. You understand that?" Rhodey scolds.
"This is not a piece of equipment!" Tony corrects him, clenching his eyes shut as his HUD blinks red. When Rhodes still doesn't get it, he elaborates, "I'm in it! It's a suit, it's me!"
Understanding overtakes the Colonel's features as he turns to the radar screens, the soldier in charge turning to him with a questioning look.
"Rhodes, you got anything for me?"
“Oh yeah, the bogey is, in fact, Tony Stark, the billion genius who is flying around, taking out terrorists in an armoured metal suit.” Rhodey deadpanned.
“Please tell me you said that.” snorted Clint.
"Mark your position and return to base," someone from base orders the jets.
"Roger that, Ballroom," one of the pilots says.
As the first jet starts to turn around and head back to base, the armour is revealed to be clinging on to the underbelly.
“Are you seriously doing that?” Bruce sighed.
“Where else was I supposed to go?” Tony glanced at him.
“I don’t know, away?”
“They would’ve seen me do that.”
“Of course.” Bruce sighed disbelieving.
The other pilot notices and leans in for a closer look, "On your belly-"
The Colonel and the man in charge share a look as the pilot continues.
"It looks like a... man! Shake him off! Roll! Roll!"
The pilot complies and starts rolling his aircraft as Tony clings on for dear life, but sadly, metal-clad fingers don't hold such a strong grip. His hands slip and he goes tumbling backwards, directly into the wing of the second jet and ripping it clean off.
“Ouch.” winced Peter, thinking back to when that had happened to him on the Avengers plane.
"I'm hit! I'm hit!" the pilot shouts as his aircraft starts to smoke and tumble.
“Oh crap.” groaned Quill worried.
Colonel Rhodes stares at the radar in fear for both his pilot and his best friend.
"Punchout! Punch out!" The other pilot yells as the crashing pilot continues scrambling for the eject feature.
He's ejected from the aircraft just as it blows to bits, and he's left falling from the air in his seat.
"Whiplash one down!" Someone shouts.
“Where’s his chute?” asked Sam looking uneasy.
The soldier with the most authority stares intently at the screen as he addresses the second pilot, "Whiplash two, do you see a chute?"
"Negative! No chute! No chute!"
“Tony…” Bruce murmured.
The camera angle switches to the falling pilot's point of view as he falls from the air, his struggle to open the chute audible over the coms.
"My chute's jammed!" he shouts, obviously panicking now.
“Oh no…” Wanda looked down at her hands.
He spreads his arms, hoping to slow his fall, when a trail of smoke comes shooting down after him from above, along with a flash of red and gold.
"Sir, I've got a visual on the bogey," the pilot reports.
"Whiplash two, re-engage. If you get a clear shot, you take it!" He orders.
Rhodey glances nervously at the man, "Sir, we don't even know what we're shooting at. Call off the raptors."
“About time you said something,” Tony muttered.
The man shoots him a cold glare, "That thing just took out an F-22 inside a legal no-fly zone!" He addresses the pilot again, but never breaks eye contact with the Colonel, "Whiplash two, if you have a clear shot, take it!"
The suit is shown flying downwards for the pilot as JARVIS speaks up, "You've been re-engaged. Execute evasive manoeuvre."
"Keep going!" Tony commands.
Finally, he reaches the pilot, grabbing onto the back of his seat and punching out the parachute. It opens immediately, and he flies up and out of sight.
The room cheered again. Tony sighed, looking tired.
“Thank goodness.” Mantis removed her hand from her mouth, her own panicked expression fading.
"Good chute! Good chute" The pilot informs the base, and they all cheer in relief.
Tony flies away, twirling around in the air as the jet is seen turning away in the distance.
Rhodey puts his phone back up to his ear, "Tony, you still there?"
"Hey, thanks," he breathes out in response.
"Oh, my god, you crazy son of a bitch," Rhodey grins, taking in a shuddering breath of relief. "You owe me a plane. You know that, right?"
“That is going to cost a lot.” pointed out T’challa.
“But then again, Tony does seem to have a bottomless wallet for some reason.”
Tony smiles and laughs a bit as the adrenaline rush fades, "Yeah, well technically, he hit me. So, now are you going to come by and see what I'm working on?"
"No, no, no, no, no, no, the less I know, the better," he says, shaking his head. "Now what am I supposed to tell the press?"
"Training exercise," Tony supplies easily, "isn't that the usual BS?"
Rhodey sighs, "It's not that simple."
"Of course it is," Tony adds with a nonchalant wave of his hand.
“No, it isn’t” Sam insisted.
“Oh it is,” smirked Tony.
The scene switches over to a view of Rhodes in uniform, standing at a podium with an array of microphones set up in front of him.
Cameras are flashing and people quiet down as he begins to speak, "An unfortunate training exercise involving an F-22 Raptor occurred yesterday. I am pleased to report that the pilot was not injured."
“See?” Tony looked at an unamused Sam.
The shot switches to a very angry Obadiah Stane, sitting on his couch in his pyjamas and robe as he watches the news broadcast.
Tony’s light-hearted expression immediately faded, switching to the darker one he had held every time he had seen Obadiah throughout the film.
Rhodey continues speaking as the view shows Obadiah's television, with the headline, 'PILOT PARACHUTES TO SAFETY AFTER TRAINING MISHAP - $84 MILLION DOLLAR F-22 RAPTOR DESTROYED.'
“Yep, you definitely have a bottomless wallet.”
"As for the unexpected turn of events on the ground in Gulmira, it is still unclear who, or what, intervened, but I can assure you that the United States government was not involved," Rhodes finishes as the camera zooms in on Stane's scowl.