Mr. Stark Is That A Mustache On Captain America?
While Peter and Tom were hanging out in the other room, Tony managed to sneak his way into a conversation with Possibly-Not-Steve and RDJ. Up until that point, he hadn't actually given a good look at his face, automatically assuming he looked literally exactly like Steve Rodgers, but now he realized he was wearing the most godforsaken ugly looking thing on his lip.
"Wait, hold on...what the hell is that on your face?" He laughs, stopping them mid-speech.
"What, is there some food stuck on me?" The man asks as a concerned look had covered his features.
"No - oh my God! You've got fucking caterpillar just resting there under your nose!" Tony laughs even harder.
Mark looks at then to the other man, noticing what he was laughing about then he too began to chuckle.
"He's talking about the mustache, Evans," RDJ snorts.
"What's wrong with my mustache?"
Tony was dying, this guy had the same face as Steve and not once has he ever seen Steve make that face. "You look like Ned Flanders from the Simpsons minus the glasses,"
God this was hilarious.
RDJ and Stark both started comparing That Guy With Steve's Face to other people that had fugly mustaches while Mark pretended to help Capsicle 2.0 with his wounded ego. It lasted for a good while until Peter and Tom came strolling out of the other room, one casually wearing the suit.
It is a little difficult to tell the two apart sometimes, but Tom pretended to be Peter in the suit and the kid totally gave him up.
They messed around for a little bit longer, the fifteen year old introduced the British actor to Karen, who definitely did not know how to make of the situation.
Normally, no one but the person inside the sit would be able to hear the AI, but Tony rushed over, doing..well doing something to the suit and gave them a thumbs up to start.
"Hey Karen, whats up?" Tom asks
Immediately, a cool robotic female voice fills the air "Good afternoon, Peter. I am required to call Tony Stark, as it seems you have undergone great biological change in less than hours since you were last in the suit. My sensors cannot pick up on any of your stats currently."
"Oh uh, Karen, I'm not Peter" he giggled, slipping out of the Queens accent he's perfected.
"I'm sorry, Peter, but I believe you may be having a case of slight amnesia. I will complete a scan of the brain to check."
The real Spider-man decides to intervene, stepping in front of Tom and waving to the mask, to Karen.
"That's not me, Karen."
"I-I don't understand. Calling Tony Stark."
Across the room, the man's phone starts to ring, the sound of Peter singing 'Spider-Man, Spider-Man, does whatever a spider can' echoing from the speakers.
"You said you deleted that!" the teen blurts out, his face blushing red.
"I did delete it, but not before I made it my ringtone for you,"
He groaned.
Soon they had moved onto something else, Tom getting bored of having a one sided conversation with the AI because she literally didn't know what to do or how to make of the situation and would send him to Tony's phone. Eventually, the actor had started talking about how cool it would be to have powers too.
"It's for the best you don't have powers though," Mustache Steve told him.
"Wha - why?" He asks, looking confused.
"Didn't you say in that one interview that if you had spider powers, the first thing you'd do would be to rob a bank"
Peter turns to face Tom, giving him an incredulous stare. "Really?"
He raises his hands up in mock surrender, his voice pitching upward as he hastily began to explain himself. "Wait--no I promise I wouldn't do that! I swear, especially because now I know you would show up totally kick my ass"
"Of course."
They go back and forth for a little bit, joking about the different ways the teenager could beat him up, when suddenly Mark interrupts. "Hey guys, uh, is anyone else getting a little hungry?"
Several murmurs of agreement fill the air and Mark decides its time for food.
"Hey, Evans, you wanna order from the hotel or we could all go out and bring something back for these guys" he asks
"Um.. I feel like they probably want to go out and explore a little bit, so why don't we have Tom and Tony go out and then Peter and Robert. One of us could chaperone each group." he plans, making eye contact with everyone as a nonverbal confirmation of the idea
"Sounds good, we just need to stay away from paparazzi" RDJ adds.
"Where are we going to eat?" the teenager pipes in, really hoping to get some pizza.
Tony ruffles Peter's hair affectionately, "I don't know, its up to you, kiddo,"
"You think he needs to pretend like he's English?" The-Guy-Who's-Not-Steve-But-Hasn't-Formally-Introduced-Himself-So-They-Don't-Know-His-Name says.
All eyes shift to the boy and RDJ makes a sound "Eh, I'm sure he'd be fine like this"
"Great" Tony claps his hands together "Lets get some food then."