A look into the characters
The Shogun never had feelings before. Or did she…?
The Shogun was a machine, a creation of brilliance by Raiden Ei, the one true Shogun the land of Inazuma worshipped. The Shogun was merely a puppet, a poser if you will, posing for Ei as she disappeared into her plane of Euthymia.The Shogun was not programmed to feel, no. The Shogun had no use for feelings - after all, Ei had created her without it, after her previous “draft” - Kunikuzushi had cried at his “birth”. She was created without the capacity to feel, without the need to breathe or eat or sleep. It made the Shogun terrifyingly efficient at her work and allowed her to continue the everlasting pursuit of Eternity.
After all, time stopped for no one, so why should the Shogun stop - if what her creator wished for was Eternity.
It seemed that since the Fatui had meddled with her creators plans for Eternity, the true Archon had seen it fit to loosen some parameters within the Shoguns programming. Loosening it such that the Shogun was a little more open to what threats to Eternity was, to feel, to understand more… mortal emotions.
It was long and hard work, where she would be put onto a table within the plane of Euthymia - wires exposed and her artificial heart beating within her chest as Ei ran through her systems, reconnecting the wires in place and adding new modules to her artificial body.
“That should be all, Shogun - I believe the modules are in place”, Ei murmurs softly, looking down at her creation with such fondness it almost feels like a mother looking at their child. And it is done.
And oh, the Shogun feels for the first time in 5 centuries, 50 decades or 500 years. She feels for the first time and it is strange.
She looks at Inazuma and feels a sense of pride knowing that she had helped build it to what it was today. There’s a heaviness in her chest that isn’t there before. Guilt, she realises - guilt that threatens to swallow her whole and guilt so heavy she feels like she is about to sink deep into the earth. Guilt, knowing that it is her that put the country in danger - put the people at risk - almost destroyed the hard work of her creator.
She feels raw emotion and she wishes to “cry” (as the mortals call it - crying to let out sadness and misery) - but it appears her creator has not created a module to allow that function within her body to exist.
So the Shogun curls up into a ball instead, in her own private quarters in Tenshukaku - slowly coming to terms with the fact she can feel and it overwhelms her horribly, for someone so used to being so emotionless it is too much to feel so much at once. She wishes Ei - her creator - had slowly introduced the module to her, had programmed it such that she would not feel the full force of this all at once.
At the same time it eases her guilt, knowing that perhaps this painful feeling in her chest and the heaviness in her vey bones - perhaps it was penance to the lives she had impacted with the Sakoku decree, to the people she had hurt with the Vision Hunt Decree. Perhaps it was rightly deserved, for her to feel the punishing feelings of everything, everywhere, all at once as it comes crashing like a large wave, swallowing her whole and dragging her deep underwater as the currents of emotions pulled her into the depths - drowning her whole.
When the Shogun meets Sara again - the general deemed to be fit to leave the infirmary after the incident with the Fatui Harbinger, La Signora was it? The Shogun no longer remembers, an insignificant pest who dared harm HER general (Wait… her general?), who dared try to impact the pursuit of eternity? No, the Shogun does not care about who the Snezhnayan envoy was - she was now but ashes.
“Your Excellency!”, Sara bows low, body shaking at the effort to hold herself in her usual poised position - the wounds had been taxing on her, the ice piercing into her back by that foul harbinger and the general thrown to the side as the fight between the traveller and the Harbinger took place. Sara had been bedridden for the past week.
It had taken multiple skilled healers to carefully extract the magical ice from her back and to heal the damage done to her torso and wings. Now it seemed the wounds still haunted her being. The Shogun’s mechanical heart twinged at the thought of the general exerting too much - of opening her closed wounds and bleeding out once again.
It seemed that even the Tengu - with a lengthened lifespan compared to mortals - were not eternal. The scars that littered the Kujou generals skin were a firm reminder of that. The Shogun did not know why she felt an inexplicable stab to her chest as she realises this.
“Rise, General. At ease.”, The Shogun speaks, and her general rises, muscles trembling from the effort as she stands straight. She sits as the Shogun gestures her to, obediently as she folds her legs under herself, spine straight as she speaks. Sara, despite barely being discharged from the infirmary and given clearance to walk again - had gone straight to Tenshukaku to deliver her report of the incidents. The Shogun listens to Sara as she speaks, about the Fatui and about the Kujou clans betrayal; Of everything that had occurred so far.
And then Sara offers her life. For she failed the Shogun, failed in her duties of keeping the Inazumans safe. Failed in her duties as a general.
The Shogun stares at her most devoted subject, now bowed low and kneeling, her face pressed into the tatami mats as she begs for her Archon’s forgiveness against sins that were not hers to begin with. The Shogun feels… strange. In the past, perhaps the Shogun would not have had a second thought, clearing Sara away much like she had done to the Fatui Harbinger - where Sara would be nothing but ash for the cleaners to sweep away. Perhaps the past Shogun would have stripped Sara of her position as a general and passed it on to someone else, still keeping the devotee in her ranks.
Methodical and apathic, the past Shogun was all of those - eternally in pursuit of eternity. But the new Shogun felt. And she was no longer a stranger to the human emotions. She knew how Sara probably felt, guilt dragging her down like waves and drowning you. Except you were on land and very much alive but the guilt may make it feel like perhaps it was better off under the ocean, eaten alive. And so the Shogun does neither of what her past self would do. Instead, she steps forward and places a hand on Sara’s trembling shoulder. “Ah but general you have not failed me.”
Sara shakes as her god - her Archon - pats her on the shoulder, before steadying her hand. The gods hand was cold to the touch, Sara could feel the cold permeate through her clothes. And yet despite it all she felt warmth from the Shogun, warmth from her actions despite it done with cold hands. Sara looks up at her god - her excellency. The very same god who granted her a vision and saved her life - who had granted her a purpose in life, to serve and protect. Her life was devoted to just that and her adoptive father, Takayuki, had ensured she knew her place. But what good was she - a mere tool before a god. A failed tool as well. Yet why was the god standing before her, comforting her.
Sara bows once more, the moment broken as the general stands - thanking her excellency as she leaves Tenshukaku, her work done. It would be rude and improper for her to overstay her welcome in a gods home after all.
The Shogun watches on as Kujou Sara leaves. She feels strange, her mechanical heart beating faster than the usual, a strange warmth emanating from her chest. The Shogun takes note to ask her creator about this the next time Ei called her into Euthymia for maintenance and checking; Ensuring the new modules were working and fixing any issues that may arise.
The Shogun and Sara continue their interactions and the Shogun often finds herself looking back fondly at older interactions between them - something she had never once done before and she finds her heart racing around one Kujou Sara, who remains blissfully ignorant of the storm she had started within the puppets once dead mechanical heart.
The Shogun starts to look forward to their talks of strategy as the general approaches her, with new treaties to sign and new documents to submit about the military. She finds herself drawn to how loyal and how devoted Sara was, she brings up excuses to talk to her general more - more strategic plans, plans for this, a longer explanation as to why Sara thought this treaty would be better and oh, the Shogun wishes she knew what to do with these feelings.
Sara finds her world turned upside down when she learns that there are 2 Archons. Or maybe only 1. The other was a puppet after all. Was her faith displaced this whole time? Who had she been serving? Did her archon not deem her worthy or trusted enough to alert her of all this?
Who was she serving?
Who had she served?
Who was she worshipping?
Sara is lost, finds herself torn between storming up to Tenshukaku and demanding an explanation to it all (but that would be far too rude and be grounds for termination), questions storm her mind as she finds herself losing faith for the first time.
Never had she lost her faith, not even when she was instructed coldly, her archon’s calculated gaze as Sara is told to seize all visions. She sees the struggles the people go through, how the visions - or lack thereof - impact their lives. But it was for eternity. It was but the wish of her Archon and she was but a tool her Archon could use to achieve eternity.
She does not lose faith as her men fall on the battlefield - their cries reaching her ears as their blood stain the ground. Dendrobiums would later bloom, scattering the tragedy with bloody-coloured beauty. She cannot sleep at night, their cries come to haunt her - lives lost at her command, lives of soldiers in her hands. She cannot sleep - but she does not lose faith.
Sara finds herself walking up the stairs to the shrine. To pay respects to the Sacred Sakura. She visits each month, praying to the Sakura for guidance as she traverses life in service to the Archon. Today as she walks up the thousand steps to the shrine she finds herself questioning why. Why, Why, Why she was walking. Why, Why, Why she had served. And Why, Why, WHY such important information that she had been serving but a puppet had been kept from her. With the “real” Archon in a plane called Euthymia whilst the puppet gave orders to Sara, to storm the front. To lead her men to battle. And for what?
What had they lost their lives for - no, who had they lost their lives for.
Sara leads her men, “Glory to the Shogun”, she says.
Lives lost for an eternity they would never see. Bodies that she digs graves for herself, when dusk settles in and there is a mutual understanding between foes and a ceasefire is commenced - time for soldiers to rest and breathe again. Sara digs graves for her men that fell, whispering prayers to the Archon as she buries her men. Her men have families and she brings the news, like Thanatos coming - she delivers news to parents, to wives, to husbands, to children.
She believed it was alright. That the eternity they worked to build was alright.
But what now? What eternity? Who’s eternity?
Sara seeks guidance from the Sakura tree, petals falling as she watches. And then Yae Miko arrives. The Guuji of the shrine, with her coy smiles and snide remarks - Sara often finds herself confused and frustrated with how the Guuji would speak and explain things. Perhaps it is because she was raised militant, not one to be able to traverse the social settings at all. Not one to speak in riddles. But the Guuji is a grounding presence. One she finds herself not minding this time.
“Guuji Yae.”
“Ah, what brings you here this time, little bird? It is not time for your monthly visit?”
…
Sara finds solace in speaking to the Guuji. It is strange, opening up about emotions she kept bottled down so tight and so close to her chest. She has to, after all she cannot let emotions get the better of her in battle, she has no such privilege. Her decisions determine the life of her men and determine if they will go home to families. The Guuji is… nice. Coy and snide as she is she is comforting. And she lets Sara cry.
YEARS AGO:
It started from the time Sara was young, a young Tengu visiting the shrine for the first time. She looks around in wonder, she remembers being in awe of the Sakura tree - having seen the Sakura blooms from all the way below the shrine. She bumps into the Guuji, distracted and Takayuki drags her by the arm and forces her to kneel before the kitsune in apology. He had berated her publicly, "Do you even know who this is?!"
She shakes with fear of what the Guuji would do, Yae requests that Takayuki leave Sara in her care for the day - and he leaves her without turning back. Sara trembles before the older youkai, would she hit her like Takayuki did? Would she force her to kneel on the rough granite beneath the sun for punishment? Would she…
She is surprised with a hug, the older Youkai offering her comfort. And the Guuji promises to be there if Sara needs it, that the shrine is always open for her to come for advice or if Takayuki becomes too much. Over the years the Guuji nurses her wounds too, when a young 14 year old Sara limps to the shrine, bruised and tired from her training and something else. The Guuji sees it all and she is there.
Yae had held Sara as she cried over the first time she led men into battle, lives lost as Sara mourned. Held Sara when Takayuki would not, when he beat her and starved her of affection. Held Sara as she navigates through life. Feeds Sara when Takayuki didn’t. She becomes a big sister to the Tengu, stepping up to help Sara as guilt also feeds the Guuji, knowing she was the one who gave the tip to the Kujou clan about the Tengu child. Knowing she had given the Tengu to those monsters.
Miko says nothing as Sara would cry, cursing her past self for not taking Sara in - cursing that the emotional wounds on the Tengu could have been avoided if she did not call up the Kujou clan head.
They had grown distant recently, with Yae wishing to stop Ei’s 500 year long tantrum and recluse life - while Sara refused to question the words of her Archon. Sara had continued the monthly shrine visits but she had stopped confiding as much in Yae. The idea that Yae was trying to divert her devotion was jarring to her - to stop the will of their Archon was… Sara had left that day - frustrated at what Yae had implied. Only recently did she realise that perhaps Yae was right - perhaps the war was unnecessary and the lives paid in blood could have been saved.
“You knew didn’t you?”, Sara mumbles as Yae embraces her. They had not spoken in a while - not since she had been told of the Kujou clans betrayal and struck down by La Signora. La Signora… when she closes her eyes she still sees the woman, throwing ice at her as it strikes her in the back. She feels the phantom pain in her wings when she stretches them out and she relives the moment of betrayal, pain and anger each time she sleeps. A recurring nightmare that she does not think will disappear too soon. When she does not see the Fair Lady - she sees her men littering the battlefield, lives lost and their blood was all on her hands.
Yae doesn’t say much, instead she merely nods and Sara breaks. She was so stupid. She should have listened. She should have payed more attention to the Kujou clan and opened her eyes to see the corruption with the Fatui. To see the fact that her father was not as righteous as he claimed to be and that he was not at all helping the nation. She should have been able to spot all of this. And yet she did not, she was blinded by her devotion and as a result she failed her men, her Archon.
And her family failed her.
It would be a long road for her recovery but for now… for now she will rest up. She was not yet permitted to return to work, under the instruction of her healers along with the Shogun signing her off on medical leave. She was not to return until she was fully healed. So for now… for now she rests.