Wolf Like Me

Fatin POV (Age 19)

They settle into a rhythm by their second year. Leah has her own friendship group and Fatin has hers, though they spend most of their time with Dot, Rachel, Martha, and Nora. Jeanette is occasionally there, lingering and talking excessively about Pink, but she tends to spend more time with her obscure boyfriend from the science department who they avoid like the plague. 

For some reason, it always feels like Thom is there to watch and observe them rather than be their friend. It always leaves Fatin with hives and feeling like a test subject. 

Fatin loves the fact that she now has a close group that Leah is so central to. In high school, they were both rather separate; though they hung around one another’s friends this was different. In this group, everyone meant just as much to one another and Fatin felt secure too in the fact that when Leah got low there was always someone there. 

Her mood would occasionally drop. Omegas entering their second puberty were susceptible to all sorts of hormonal changes that could lead to depression and anxiety. Shifts in mood or appetite which often resulted in Leah frowning and pushing her plate away. 

She noticed it first a month before their exams. Fatin had made Leah breakfast -her favourite- pancakes with a healthy drizzle of chocolate and chopped strawberries. Leah simply stared at it with a blank expression. 

“I’m not hungry.” 

“You didn’t eat dinner last night.” 

Leah looked up, eyes flickering gold in a state of annoyance that surprised Fatin enough that she almost dropped the plate. 

“I’m not hungry.” 

Nodding, she gave the plate to Dot instead who mumbled out a thank you. A mixture of shock and hurt coloured Fatin’s features. 

Warning eyes were not something to take lightly, especially between mates. Without knowing how she had triggered such discomfort in her mate, she felt on edge. 

Leah didn’t eat that day and Fatin didn’t push, even though it left an itchy feeling like hives under her skin. She thought of gold and squeezed her eyes shut to blur the image dancing in her mind. 

It became a regular occurrence; Leah not eating. Skipping meals. Forgetting to drink. 

Soon it tumbled into her not sleeping, the wolf growing more agitated with each passing week. She snapped at Fatin on occasion, leaving her jaw wide open in shock each time. Anger was not Leah. Neither was this relationship with food or sleep. 

The week of their exams she stopped seeing Fatin, holed herself up in her room, and rarely texted her back. 

Fatin hated it and spent most nights feeling overly defensive when anyone asked if she was okay. ‘I’m fine,’ she always told them. Fatin has never been further from fine. 

She tried to help but each time Leah grew more and more annoyed until one night she yelled at Fatin to get out. 

Maryann texted her on the weekend asking if Leah was managing okay. She was clearly not but Fatin debated if it was her place to reveal those truths. Their parents knew that something was up, Leah barely texted home and dropped her phone calls to her parents. Then Fatin was stiff whenever her mother called, glazing over whenever she asked about her mate. 

Biting her cheek, Fatin texted back. If Leah was irked by the revelation Fatin would deal with it as she did every other regular outburst from her. Leah’s health took priority over her annoyance toward Fatin, even if it left Fatin’s stomach twisting.

Kurt headed up the day after their exams. Leah’s face was far paler than usual with none of her usual rosy cheeks in sight, her hair was greasy, and her cardigan needed a wash. 

“I’m gonna take Lee out to grab some food and a drink, do you want to come?” 

Sighing, Fatin shook her head. The truth was that she was not sure that Leah would even want her to be there and knew that she was more likely to eat if relaxed and just around Kurt. 

“It’s fine, you go ahead. I’ll see you later though.” 

“Okay kid. Her bedroom is a mess so I’ll call Maryann in a bit. Ask her what I need to grab.”

Fatin shook her head. “It’s fine, I’ll get it sorted while you’re out.” 

“You don’t need to-”

“She’s my mate, it’s the least I can do.” God knows she wouldn’t let Fatin do anything else. 

Fatin felt helpless and sorting Leah’s room felt like the smallest piece of being helpful that she could offer. Even if Leah was pissed when she got back Fatin would take it on the chin, wanting to know she at least tried to help her mate through this. 

Whatever this was.

Sliding the key into the door, Fatin nodded at Rachel on the way in. 

“It’s pretty bad in there,” Rachel warned. “She wouldn’t let me bring the cups out. I don’t know if she’s nesting or something, but she seems pretty adamant against help.” 

“I’m on it.” 

Leah’s room was hell on earth: it was clothing covering every inch of flooring, books strayed across any flat surface, cups and cutlery, plates and takeout that had been sat there for god knows how long. It looked as if a hurricane had visited her room and left it a complete wreck.

It certainly wasn’t good. 

Her mate normally craved tidiness and organisation. This wasn’t Leah, just as her temperament wasn’t either. 

However, Fatin only had limited time to do this so she worked quickly. First, she took all the dishes and mugs to the sink, shaking her head when Rachel offered to help. Rachel had exams tomorrow she wasn’t about to make her wash up some ghastly-looking shit. 

“I’ve got it Reid.”

“Good luck. If you need a hazmat suit let me know. I don’t think mugs should harbor life like that.”

Fatin scrubbed everything twice over and filled the entire drainer rack up with plates, mugs, and cutlery. Mugs that Fatin was sure had resided in there for a week or two… maybe three. 

Next, she took a binbag and emptied Leah’s trash bin. Shaking another out she worked on collecting the array of take-out cartons and trash. It wasn’t near enough assuming she hadn’t cleaned. Leah had been looking thinner by the day and Fatin knew why. It made her stomach contort as she bit her cheek. 

She had seen it before in high school on occasion. Moments where Leah would get so sucked into studying that everything including self-care and food came last. Leah grew obsessive and often lacked the ability to compartmentalise her studies from living. The two blended until one overshadowed the other. 

Yet it was never this bad; Leah always made room for Fatin and let her help. She didn’t block her out and throw walls up around her, and she certainly never lashed out at her with harsh words and glares.

Ditching the two huge bags in the trash, she started on her laundry. Leah’s laundry basket was full, so Fatin filled another huge trash bag with clothing and then heaved the two lots down to the laundry room, setting both on in two machines. 

Kurt: Taking Lee to grab some new shoes, her docs are looking rough. Gives you an extra hour or two with the bomb site. 

Fatin: Thank you. Maybe suggest the ones with zips on the side? She always gets annoyed when she’s loosening all the laces and in a rush. 

Kurt: Will do. Do you need anything? 

Fatin: No, I’m good thank you.

Fatin had wanted to buy some for her, but Leah had refused; stating they were worn but fine. She would disagree; Leah had the things for years now and they now looked better suited for trekking around the woods than the college campus, the toe fronts were worn and the heels caving in. 

Eventually, she brought the laundry back and finished up with the rest. She spent an hour cleaning everything, opening the window to let air in as she wiped down surfaces and hoovered. She changed Leah’s sheets, folded her laundry, and put it away. 

Everything was perfect, exactly as Leah liked it. 

With a deep breath, she smiled meekly at her handiwork and headed back to her place. 

Leah wouldn’t want to see her, so much had been made apparent. 

It was a few hours later that someone knocked on their door. 

“Hi,” Leah said, looking small and bashful as she curled in on herself. Her cardigan looked bigger than usual, her face was pale, and her demeanour was broken. 

It was a sight that pained Fatin. She wanted nothing more than to fix it but that was not wanted. An alpha's job was to protect but Leah wanted nothing more than her space from Fatin. Her fingers curled into fists at her sides to stop herself from reaching out to her.

“Hi.” 

“Can I come in?” 

Fatin nodded, stepping aside. 

Her mate headed straight to Fatin’s room, waiting for Fatin to join her as she wrung her hands and worried her bottom lip until it bled. 

“Thank you… for cleaning. Rachel said it was you.” 

“You don’t need to thank me. You would have done the same.” 

She sighed, tugging at her cardigan sleeve anxiously. “I’m sorry for the past month. I got stressed with exams and-” Swallowing, Leah rolled her shoulders that were rigid. “Dad dropped me at student health on the way back. After running some bloods they found out that a few things were off. They gave me some hormones to take and gave me a few injections.”

Her fingers wrenched at the threads of her cardigan. “I’m feeling a little better already, but they think because we’ve been mated so long and I’m heading into second puberty that it might have triggered a huge imbalance. My body was producing more alpha hormones than it should so I-”

“Went into warning states.” 

“Yeah. Omegas shouldn’t produce that, not in those levels, so they think that combined with us being recently sexually active may have thrown them off.” 

“You’re okay now?” 

Leah nodded. “Yeah. One pill every night and I should be fine, they’ll need to monitor my bloods each month though to get my dosage right.” 

“You hate needles.” 

“I do. Thought you might come with me next time?”

“Always,” Fatin said, wrapping her arms around Leah. Her scent had mellowed again, gone was the stressed angst-ridden scent and back was Leah. Though she still needed a shower. 

“Want to shower?” 

“Is that your way of telling me I’m gross right now?” 

Shaking her head, Fatin pulled her up. 

She took them to the bathroom, quietly stripping both of their clothes as she ran the shower. Leah was limp against her as she ran the sponge over her, cleaning her mate as she placed a gentle kiss between her shoulder blades. 

Next, Fatin worked on her hair; shampooing and then massaging conditioner through it as her mate sighed. 

“You scared me,” Fatin admitted as they sat on her bed. Leah rested in front of her, Fatin’s thumbs working across her mate’s shoulders as she dug them into the knots that had formed there. 

“Shit that’s good,” Leah mumbled. “I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be, I should have known something was up.” 

Leah shook her head. “I dropped out of one of the clubs. I think I just overfilled my plate and the stress from that was amplified by the hormone thing. I was so tired; I’ve spent most nights glued to my books or covering journalism club shit and everything else.” 

“You need a break sometimes.” 

“I know.” Leah dropped her head back against Fatin. “I love you. And I really meant it, thank you. For everything. That was hours of work.” 

Fatin ran her nose along Leah’s neck. “It was nothing.”