Change of seasons
“Hey, Siri,” Darcy looked up at the ceiling, waiting for a response from FRIDAY. The AI didn’t seem to like her occasional nickname for her and remained silent for a few seconds so she continued: “Could you tell me where James is right now?”
"What do you want with Rhodey?" came Stark's voice behind her.
"I mean Barnes," she said matter-of-factly while turning back to him. "And what is it to you?"
It had been a stressful day for both of them with Tony working on his new inventions and her making sure everything was safe and correctly protocolled.
"Ah, White James." Tony nodded self-satisfied and continued with his work. Too engrossed in his current task to even bother teasing her any further. Or answering her question.
His young assistant only shook her head with a giggle and looked up at the ceiling again.
"FRIDAY? Come on I was just joking!"
"James Barnes is currently on his way to you."
Oh? She certainly hadn't expected that answer. One look at the clock however answered her unspoken question.
It was lunchtime. And like the vintage gentleman that Bucky was, he came to pick her up today as well.
A few seconds later he stepped into the lab without making any sound.
His assassin skills sometimes scared her. Not in the life-threatening kind of way. But more so that she was in awe of them. As long as she didn't think about the reason how he got them in the first place.
"Hey, James." She sent him a smile as she stepped closer. Still not certain of how to greet him properly, since she wasn't sure he'd appreciate her hugs just yet. Or ever.
"Hey." He breathed quietly and gave her a small smile.
"I actually wanted to tell you before you got here but I lost track of time." Giving him an apologetic look she tried to read him.
James Barnes, more than ever, seemed unsure. She wasn't aware of what exactly but she immediately explained: "I actually wanted to ask if you'd be fine with us cancelling lunch for today...You see we've got so much to do and this lab is all over the place-"
"Don't worry about it. You're not obliged to-"
"Who said I was feeling obliged?" she interrupted him. Not wanting his thoughts to go that route. " I asked you . Remember?"
The soldier blinked at her as she gave him an almost angry look for even thinking he wasn't anything but a charity project.
"Besides I was about to ask you if you'd be fine with dinner instead?"
:-:-:-:
Dumbfounded he couldn't do anything but blink. Certainly hadn't expected that turnout.
Darcy only watched him expectantly. Big blue eyes staring up at him.
"It would be my pleasure." He finally managed to say, with much more charm than he had anticipated.
It seemed that his confidence and his old self were much closer to grasp whenever he was around the petite assistant. To his own surprise, that was.
And to hers as well, it seemed.
Darcy appeared a little taken aback by his choice of words. Nodding a few times to seemingly get her thoughts together, her smile grew wider.
"Okay, then. Meet me in the Common Room at 7pm. I'll make sure no one else comes to bother us. Unless of course you'd like more company?", she practically whispered, so Stark wouldn't hear it.
"No, no need for others."
:-:-:-:-:-:-:
When Bucky Barnes stepped into the Common Room a few hours later, an array of scents hit him.
There at the stove of the kitchen Darcy was stirring a pot. Completely engrossed in serving the sauce onto the two plates of food, she didn't notice his presence.
Bucky made his way to the kitchen counter until her head snapped up and she gave him the most beautiful smile he had seen.
"Hi, handsome. I'm glad you could make it."
"I didn't expect you to actually cook dinner for us."
"I know you didn't. But I wanted to."
:-:-:-:-:
She eyed him expectantly, trying to read his reaction after he took the first bite.
Feeling her gaze upon him he immediately swallowed, almost choking on it.
Her eyes grew bigger and Bucky had a hard time on focusing to eat, which she seemed to notice for she started giggling.
“I’m sorry. I’m more of a baker than a cook that’s why I’m so curious.” Darcy started picking on her own food and took a few bites. Seemingly satisfied with her creation she continued to eat.
Meanwhile Bucky managed to finally concentrate on the meal before him.
She had prepared chicken, with a red sauce and rice on the side and he definitely liked it.
So he decided to comment on it, trying to break the silence that was setting upon them.
But as usual Darcy beat him to it: “James?”
The man in question raised his head with interest. He didn’t know what to expect but waited as she took a quick breath.
“I’m still switching between Bucky and James. I’m sure it’s confusing and annoying but I’ve been trying to figure out which one to use-”
“I like it when you call me James,” he blurted out without thinking. Bucky winced inwardly as her lips formed into a surprised “O”.
Meanwhile Sam was laughing at him in the back of his head. God, was he glad he wasn’t here with them.
“James it is.” Darcy replied, oblivious to Bucky’s inner turmoil.
“Bucky is okay, too. No one seems to call me James these days. Except for Stark occasionally. But I only seem to like it when you do it.”
Oh, for the love of god. Could someone sew his mouth shut and throw him out the next window too if possible?
His eyes had been focused on the plate in front of him, so when he finally looked up at Darcy he saw that the woman had turned a few shades redder on her face and was averting his eyes.
Well, that was interesting.
He couldn’t remember when he had last gotten a reaction like that from a woman.
:-:-:-:-:-:
As he made his way through the entrance hall, Bucky practically flew past the reception area. His mind was elsewhere so he missed the shouting of his name. Only coming to a full stop when he heard rapid steps, the sound indicating it was a woman behind him.
Bucky turned around slowly as if scared what he would see.
He was greeted by none other than Hailey Grant.
She was smiling at him, though her breathing seemed unsteady.
“I never would’ve thought it would be so hard to get a hold of you guys.”
The ex-assassin tilted his head, practically glooming at her. Even though he tried not to.
“I just...I just wanted to ask you for something. But how are you anyways? I heard you’re hanging out with Darcy a lot.”
Bucky answered almost stoic, hoping it would shorten the conversation they were currently having.
The woman in front of him seemed to slowly notice and started searching through her bag.
She took out a small box and Bucky practically screamed inside as she opened it.
Only to find a set of cards in it.
“My brother is a huge fan of Captain America and his friends. He’s been collecting so many old cards. His birthday is coming up and I was wondering if you could sign some of these for me? You're his favourite."
Bucky Barnes was completely lost.
It felt like people were constantly trying to prove him wrong. No matter what he expected.
“It doesn’t have to be right now, obviously but you could keep them for a few days if that’s what you need.
“You know where to find me.” She glanced back at the reception. Bucky nodded in response and she sent him a bright smile before making her way back to work.
:-:-:-:-:
“I’m pretty sure Bucky Barnes hates me.”
Darcy, who was currently running around the compound with a bunch of files pressed to her chest and her phone balancing on her shoulder, huffed incredulously.
“Why would he hate you?”
This time it was Hailey who breathed into the speaker. “I’m not sure. I ran into him yesterday and asked him if he could sign some cards for Aaron. But I felt like he was annoyed by me the second I stood before him. I’m pretty sure he wanted to leave as soon as he saw me. I saw it in his eyes, Darcy.”
Darcy let out a soft giggle at her friend’s statement. Stepping into the elevator she asked FRIDAY to bring her back to the labs.
“He was pretty normal when I saw him for lunch yesterday. Are you sure you’re not just reading too much into it? Maybe he just partied too hard on the weekend and was hungover.”
Her joke was met with dead silence and she could practically feel Hailey’s eyes turning into the back of her head.
“or not…”
“I’m being serious, Darcy. Maybe I was too pushy? I mean that guy barely knows me he probably-”
“Look.” Darcy interrupted her friend before she could go down the self-pity route. “James is- He still needs time to adjust. I mean that dude’s been through a lot and I’m sure you just caught him in a bad moment. Believe me he’s a real softie. Besides you’ve only met him like what? Twice?
“It took me at least five encounters to hate you.” she joked, rearranging the files in her arms and jumping comically to not lose her phone in the process.
“Very funny.” Hailey deadpanned, though she was sure she heard amusement hidden in her tone.
“Don’t worry, I’m sure he’ll sign those thingies for your brother.”
:-:-:-:-:-:
“Isn’t it a little too early for Christmas songs?” Bucky asked with a bemused expression.
He was currently sitting in Banner’s lab, waiting for her to finish what she had been working on.
Bruce and Tony had already left for lunch when he came to pick her up, so he had made himself comfortable on the chair next to her as she scribbled down some notes.
Darcy stopped humming and looked up at him with a grin. “It’s never too early for Christmas song,” then with a deeper voice: “Winter is coming.”
“It’s still June.” He raised an eyebrow at her statement, tilting his head at the window to show a clear sky.
“Nevermind. We’ll watch that one together soon,” she replied, only confusing him further. “What I mean is time flies and winter is just around the corner.”
Bucky furrowed his brows as she turned her focus back to the files in front of her.
“I don’t like winter.”
“How come, buddy? It has Christmas and warm coats. Perfect excuses to eat more.”, she grinned at him but he barely registered it.
Feeling himself losing focus, he stood up from the chair abruptly, making Darcy jump in the process.
She was quickly on her feet, walking around the chair to stand in front of him.
He raised his hands to his head, trying to massage his temples.
“What’s wrong?”
“It’s- It’s cold. I hate it. Too cold.”
“What is?”
“Winter.” he breathed out. It was hard for him to stay in the present as memories of the cold and electricity seemed to run through him.
He felt like he was losing power over his mind and body. As if he could command it to move but he was frozen on the spot. “Put him on ice.” His heart beat rapidly, as if it was trying to break out of its cage. Breathing was hard. Really hard.
Two warm hands were placed on his face.
“James, focus on my hands. Focus on me.” he heard Darcy’s soft voice. “I’m here. You’re at the Avenger’s Compound. Steve is a few stairs up. Focus.”
Her voice became clearer as he focused on the feeling of her fingertips on his cheeks. She was warm, so warm.
Bucky raised his eyes to look at her: Darcy’s face was merely inches away as she looked at him, eyes searching for any reaction he could give.
Her fingers brushed on his cheeks and it was then the he realised that she was wiping away tears.
Darcy continued to softly speak affirmations to him as he put his whole focus on her and slowly calmed down his heartbeat.
“Slow breaths.”
He complied and raised his arms to hold hers, still trying to calm himself.
Bucky was holding onto her almost desperately.
After what seemed like hours but couldn’t have been more than a few minutes he regained his composure and stood up straighter. Regretting it immediately as Darcy’s hands slowly slipped from his face. But she kept them on his sides, making soothing motions on his body.
Their position felt more intimate than anything he had experienced in a while. Let alone with a dame he fancied.
“I’m sorry.” he breathed after a while of just staring at her. Taking everything in. The strands of hair that had fallen into her face, her big blue eyes that were slightly reddened as if she had been about to cry for him. He felt miserable. How a tiny mention of the cold could make him turn into a mess in mere seconds.
“Nothing to be sorry for.” Her soft voice was like a caress against his face. “I’m sorry you just had to go through that.”
Her arms wrapped behind his back and she almost slammed into his chest. Bucky took in a sharp breath, making her look up to him in concern.
He slowly embraced her in his arms and breathed in her scent.
She smelled like freshly baked cookies. Warm and sweet, just like her.
“Let’s forget about lunch. Let’s just go for a walk. Take in some fresh air.” came her muffled voice under him. He hummed in agreement and they slowly entangled from each other.
Making him ache for her more than ever.
:-:-:-:-:
His body was sore.
That’s the first thing he noticed when he finally opened his eyes after another restless night.
After the incident with Darcy he had spend the rest of the day training in the gym. Letting out his frustrations through the punching bag- or rather bags. (“Why do you supersoldiers always have to use these things? Y’all know they don’t last for more than three minutes.)
When Steve had found him there at two in the morning he hadn’t had an explanation either.
He didn’t really know why he was frustrated. If it had to do with his panic attack or rather the short moment of intimacy he had shared with Darcy.
The petite woman was constantly on his mind and it was starting to take a toll on him.
He was frustrated.
At not being able to just approach her like he would’ve back in the old days.
When he had not been such a mess. When had not been more asset than a man.
The former assassin sat up on the bed, massaging his temples to cure the headache that was bothering him once again.
A glance at the clock told him it was already past ten. Steve was probably still out on the field, he had reluctantly left him in the gym when Clint had come to get him.
After a long warm shower he stepped into the living room. Before he could even sit down on the couch FRIDAY announced the presence of none other than Sam Wilson.
Bucky groaned in annoyance. Steve had probably asked their friend to check up on him.
For a short moment he considered pretending he wasn’t home, but he dismissed the thought as soon as it came. Sam would just barge in one way or another so he just opened the door and let him in.
“Good morning to you, too.” Sam walked in with a serious face, though his lips twitched slightly.
“Yeah.”
“Wanna go for a run?”
“I just took a shower.” Bucky replied.
Sam turned around to face him, crossing his arms as if waiting for him to elaborate.
“Your point is? You don’t even break a sweat. Especially if you don’t try to make me look like a fool.”
“Yeah, yeah. I’ll get ready, you jerk.”
Bucky walked into his room with a dismissive hand gesture.
“Oh, now I’m the jerk.”
:-:-:-:-:-:
“You’ve been hanging out with Darcy a lot lately. Anything you wanna tell me?”
“No.”
:-:-:-:-:-:
For the first time they were having lunch outside the Compound.
Darcy had brought chinese food from the city, so they sat on a bank, watching some workers running inside of the building while eating.
Occasionally Darcy made comments about some interns she had met a few weeks back that were walking around.
He loved hearing her talk. The way she got so excited whenever she talked about her co-workers and friends. He loved how full of emotions she was and how unafraid to show them.
He had been scared to pick her up for lunch. After what had happened the day before he was sure she’d want some space. But his legs had brought him back to the labs anyways.
And as always she had greeted him with a bright smile, this time showing him a plastic bag with their food inside.
More than ever he ached to touch her. After having her in his arms like that he couldn’t help but long for more. And it was these thoughts that made him feel so guilty.
While she had felt nothing but innocent concern for him as she had tried to calm in down, his wishful mind imagined how wonderful it would be if he could just hold her all the time.
“Where do you go?”
“Huh?” Her sudden question pulled him out of his thoughts and he blinked at her.
"When you zone out like that, where do you go?"
Her eyes were big as she stared at him, lips slightly parted and Bucy found it hard to concentrate on the question at hand.
And he couldn’t help but imagine what it would feel like to have those soft lips on his own.
What it would feel like to be loved by her.
:-:-:-:-:-:-: