ᵇᶦᵗᶜʰ ʷʰᵃᵗ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠᵘᶜᵏ
“Not to be dramatic but if you don’t give me information on where my dads are, F.R.I.D.A.Y, I’m gonna lose my goddamn mind,” Quinn shouted to the ceiling of the Avengers common room.
“The Avengers are scattered around the universe.” F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice announced
“ᵇᶦᵗᶜʰ ʷʰᵃᵗ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠᵘᶜᵏ” Peter screeched.
“As much as I love vines I really don’t think this is the time. Is there any more information you can give us? We have to do something,” Quinn said.
“The Avengers that have been kidnapped at the battle in England are Steve, Clint, Wanda, Tony and Bruce,” F.R.I.D.A.Y recited.
“Kidnapped?!” Ari exclaimed, “We gotta go after them!”
Before anyone else could speak, the sliding glass doors in the entryway opened to reveal a raccoon with a very large gun, a tree taller than Peter, and a girl with pitch black eyes.
“You guys...you’re seeing this right?” Peter asked.
“Why the fuck is there a tree, an alien, and a fuckin’ trash panda in our compound!?” Quinn whispered, a little too loudly.
The raccoon cocked it’s gun, “Who ya callin’ trash panda, princess!”
“Oh my God, it talks!” Peter squeaked.
“Of course I talk, what am I, an animal?” The raccoon snarked.
The trio looked between them with eyebrows raised.
“I Am Groot,” Groot said with a video game in hand and proceeded to get comfortable on one of the couches.
“What the fuck? I’m Quinn Roger-Barnes, I guess?” She replied, throwing her hands in the air.
Groot gave her a look like, ‘... bimch?’
“Anyways, I’m Rocket. That’s Groot-”
“Yeah I think we got that,” Ari said
Rocket just rolled his eyes, “And that’s Mantis. We were sent by the pirate angel to come get you.”
“Pirate Angel? You mean Thor?” Peter asked and Rocket nodded.
Ari jutted her hip, scarily similar to Natasha, “Can someone actually give us some information on what the fuck is going on?”
“Basically, this big purple grape dilido is trying to end the universe with some stones, and he sent one of his creepy kids and that’s who your Avengers went to fight. Didn’t go so well for them but he’s also got one of our own so we came to get you guys to get all of them back,” Rocket explained.
“I would say im surprised they sent for us, but then again, it’s Thor,” Ari sighed, “Well, to the weapons room.”
Quinn did a little dance, “The universe may be in danger but my combat outfit? Stunning. Let’s go.”
~
Peter was busy trying to press every single button in the Guardians ship while Rocket, Ari, and Quinn planned how they would rescue the Avengers.
“So, who’s not captured by the dilido?” Ari asked.
“Some dude with a metal arm, chick with red hair and some winged dude, I didn’t really have time to get names. One of the guys has one of the stones in his head,” Rocket said while putting together more weapons on the table.
Quinn nodded, “So Bucky, Natasha, Sam and Vision should be waiting for us. Ari you should see if you can get some morse code or some spy shit across to your mom. I’ll see what I can do for папа” (translation: papa)
“Oh, and Thor’s brother is not captured either,” Mantis said from the front of the ship.
“Loki? Huh. Anyways, I hate you and your true spy stereotypes.” Ari said, before going to do exactly that. Spy stereotypes.
Peter turned away from the buttons, Rocket didn’t tell him but he was two away from self destructing the ship, “Mr.Loki? The one that attacked New York City? Is he- Is less, ya know, murderous now?”
“I wouldn’t say that, but murderous for the right kind of people,” Rocket replied.
Ari came back, “Okay, I got ahold of my mom. The remaining Avengers are in England, we should meet them there.”
“Well, we should be in for a good fight,” Peter sighed.
~
The fields where the battle had been taking place looked like it’d been run through a blender. Several things were on fire, and buildings were crumbled all around the trio, and the Guardians making their way through the field.
“Damn, when the Avengers come to fight the destruction is no joke,” Quinn commented, kicking over what was left of an alien corpse.
One of the aliens growled, jumping out to attack but was quickly brought down by a rain of bullets from Rocket’s gun.
“That’s disgusting,” Peter grimaced at the black tar that oozed out of the body.
There was movement in the treeline and suddenly a very worn out looking Bucky walked out to meet them.
“Папа!” Quinn yelled, running full force at him and landing in his arms, “How are we gonna get dad back? I’m ready to kick ass.”
He sighed, “You kids shouldn’t even be here. It all went to shit.”
“Yeah, well, we are. Thor sent for us.” Ari shrugged.
“Of course he did. We have a makeshift base with two quinjets back in the forest, come on.”
Other warm greetings were made once they made it back to base, including a loving nickname of ‘little spider’ for Peter from Natasha since she knew he was anxious about getting Tony back.
The affections were quickly lost once the plans on how to get the other Avengers, and as the trio learned Gamora, who was also kidnapped, back from Thanos.
“I’m just saying! Ari and I are small we could climb into where the giant doughnut is parked and gather intel!” Quinn argued.
“I’m not using my daughter to gather information on aliens!” Bucky snapped back.
“Mom, I know how to climb through vents if you would just-”
“Absolutely not, neither of you have received enough training for situations like this,” Natasha said.
“THAT’S BECAUSE YOU NEVER LET US GO ON ANY MISSIONS!” Quinn yelled at full volume, to which she regretted due to the amount of deadly assassin looks she got.
“What’s the point of us being here if you won’t let us help? Last time I checked, Mister Stark let me on the team for a reason, uh, so, that came out a lot more rude than I meant but the point still stands. Even if Quinn and Ari don’t fight, I am, because I’m, uh, I’m an Avenger,” Peter spoke up for the first time in a while, standing his ground in front of Bucky and Natasha. Which is a pretty bad ass thing to do in the other girls’ eyes.
Natasha raised her eyebrows, “Fine spiderling, you can fight. Ari, stay in the quinjet.”
Ari looked like she wanted to say something, but decided against it and walked over to a bench.
“Fine, you want us to stay in the quinjet? That’s cool. Ari, whenever you want to join me,” Quinn shot her a look, “You’re welcome to.”
Ari stood up quickly, following her.
The two girls entered the jet, and one of them hit the button for the door to close up.
“You want us to stay on the jet? Fine, we’ll steal one,” Quinn announced, to no one in particular as she started the engines.
~
The doughnut space ship wasn’t as intimidating as they thought, nor was it that hard to get into and get some useful information. Ari ended up scaling some of the railings so she could hear some of Thanos’ minions talking about how difficult the ‘Blond Beef’ was being. It took all of her not to laugh.
While Ari was figuring out where the Avengers were being kept, Quinn was figuring out how to hack into the ship’s database and figured out where the aliens were coming from.
Eventually they returned to the base camp with all of the information to some pretty pissed off parents.
“I don’t get why y’all are so angry we literally got all the information needed.” Ari shrugged.
Sam’s eyebrows shot up, “We told you little demons to stay in the jet, not TAKE the jet.”
“Technically we did stay in the jet for most of the mission sooooo,” Quinn shrugged and Bucky looked like he was going to strangle her.
“You’re both grounded, till you’re thirty but, thank you for getting the information without getting caught,” Natasha said and the adults walked away to start planning once again.
That’s when the two girls were bombarded by a bouncing spider talking a mile a minute, “WHy didn’t you guys tell me you were gonna go out on your own?! I could’ve helped, I wanna prove myself just as much as you two. I’m an actual Avenger dude!”
Quinn rolled her eyes, “If you say the phrase ‘I’m an Avenger’ one more time I’ll revoke the title so hard out of your ass you won’t be able to use your spidey senses.”
Ari snorted, “Besides, we couldn’t exactly run out of the quinjet to bring you with us, that would raise questions.”
“It was a snap decision, don’t get your suit in a twist,” Quinn said as she cleaned her guns.
Peter was about to sass back before an explosion went off a couple miles east of them. The spider mask built around his face before all three of them ran to the rest of the group.
“What the hell was that?” Ari asked.
“Trouble,” Vision replied before shooting up above the treeline to get a better view of what was going on by the explosion.
Before a plan could be put in place, lightning struck the ground around them and suddenly Thor and Loki stood before them.
“Hey, greasy, you help me get my dad back and we’ll call it even with your little shitshow attack on my city,” Quinn yelled to the brothers.
Loki looked offended but then revealed a small fond smile, “Don’t worry little one, I have just as much vengeance towards the purple beast as you.”
Quinn shrugged in approval, “Eh, I like him.”
“What’s going on down there Thor?” Natasha asked, stepping forward towards them.
“Thanos has brought more aliens to fight, and probably a few more of his children. At the moment he only has one of the infinity stones but that still makes him extremely powerful. We need proceed with caution. Are you bringing the tiny fighters along?” Thor announced.
“YES!” Quinn and Ari said quickly, at the same time.
“NO!” Bucky yelled immediately after them.
Thor looked confused for a split second but then let out a giant grin, “So they come and fight, Excellent. Let’s go, I’ve got some ass to kick.”
“You can’t say no to the pirate angel,” Rocket said as he climbed atop Groot to travel to the fight.
“I’m going to rescue my stupid husband and he’s gonna kick my ass,” Bucky groaned as he led some of the team into one of the quinjets.
Quinn laughed, “Boy oh boy, I better catch that on film.”
“You’re never leaving the compound again.”
“We’ll see about that, пожилой человек” Quinn smirked. (translation: old man)
And with that the jets took off towards the now on fire part of the forest, and unknown to the trio of teenagers, basically their own personal hell.