Thor woke to a dark room and the soft whirring of the ships ventilation system. He rubbed absently at his eye, at least what was left of it. He flopped over on to his stomach and grabbed a fistful of sheets to cacoon himself more efficiently. He prayed to the Norns he’d fall back asleep. Sleep has been evading him of late, waking at odd hours such as tonight. Images of Asgard in flames stuck in his mind as he dreamed. Other times a dull throbbing, where his eye should be, kept him awake.
It wasn't fair. Loki didn't seem to have this problem. He lazily slapped the space next to him. If he wasn't sleeping, Loki wouldn't either.
The ship they had been calling home the last few weeks was large enough to carry the people that they had, but was a little cramped as far as living arrangements were concerned. There were simply not enough bedrooms to go around. A few storage rooms had been empty and the people didn’t waste any time in making them into new living spaces. Even then, no one had a room to themselves. There just wasn't enough livingspace. Thor realized very early on that it would be best to share a room himself. Loki had been a given, he didn't even have to extend an invention.
After had released Loki from his bone crushing hug Loki had opened his hidden-dimensional-pocket-thing and dumped a good portion of clothing, books, and weapons onto the floor. With a flick of his hand his belongings had neatly arranged themselves into every nook and cranny of the room. Thor had to admit he was slightly envious of his brothers magic at times.
Unfortunately for Loki, Thor had been overwhelmed by his emotions once again realizing his little brother really was there and had tackled him to the floor in another hug. He then extended an invitation to both the Hulk and Valkyrie to room with them, they both accepted. Loki had been wary of the Hulk, at first, causing some tension in the room but after a few days Hulk was gone, and in his place was Bruce.
Thor had felt the immediate relief at the sight of his Midgardian friend. While he had appreciated Hulk immensely for his brute strength, durability, and his part in saving the people of Asgard, he had worried for his other half. Bruce had been worried that if he turned back into the Hulk he would never turn back, yet had still been willing to give himself up to the Hulk for Asgards sake. Thor would be lying if he said he hadn't dropped what he had been doing at that moment to drag Banner in for a hug.
There was a lot of hugging on Thor's part that first week drifting through space.
Once Bruce wasn’t green and, well, hulking, Loki was able to calm and relax a considerable amount. Except Bruce then become the wary one, often seen side eyeing Loki and using some truly impressive avoidance maneuvers. However, after the second week, Loki and Bruce could be found tinkering with many complicated looking mechanisms around the ship and in deep discussions on various theories and debates on magic and science. Bruce’s curious side getting the better of himself. Thor had been happy to see them actually get along.
Thor’s hand landed on cool sheets instead of his sleeping brother. He squinted at the dark, instead of his brothers face he was meet with nothing. Thor hefted himself onto his elbow and craned his neck around searching for the familiar pale figure and head of dark hair. He saw the shapes of Bruce and Valkyrie on a mattress on the floor, but no Loki.
“He’s in the bathroom,” Croaked the small lump of blankets that currently made up Valkyrie, “he's throwing up. It woke me and it's gross, make him stop.” The irritation was clear in her voice and punctuated with the muffled sound of retching from the bathroom. Now that he looked in the right direction he could see the soft glow of light filtering from underneath the door.
“How long has he been in there?” The sheets had been cool, so it wasn't recent, he knew that.
“Long enough to be annoying.” Thor kicked back his sheets and padded softly to the bathroom. He ignored her complete lack of concern for his brother. She was most likely drunk or hungover. He slipped in the room trying to not let too much light into the dark room and wake the slumbering doctor, and shut the door as softly as he could.
He was greeted by his brothers hunched over form. He would have laughed at Loki's misfortune if he hadn't looked quite as miserable as he did. Loki has been pale his whole life, even when the summer rolled around, and constant outside activity. He never tanned, he always burned bright red, something Thor and his friends used to tease him about. Thor had not even been aware that Loki could be paler, but here he was, stark white. It contrasted the dark circles under his eyes too well. Another heavy bout of illness had Loki's thin frame shaking. Thor keeled next to his brother and pulled his hair back and away from his face. He rubbed Loki's back as he tried to catch his breath.
Loki leaned away from toilet and wiped at his mouth. Thor looked around and found a small hand towel. He ran it under some cold water before he returned to his brothers side and held it out for him. Loki gratefully took it and wiped his whole face, cleaning it of sweat and sick. They sat there in the quite a few minutes until it was clear Loki was finished being ill. Loki let Thor move him around so he was leaning backwards over the edge of the small bath. He sat quietly while Thor used the shower hose to clean the vomit out of his hair.
“I am sorry that I woke you. That was not my intention.” Thor paused in his ministrations searching his face for something unknown to Loki. After a beat Thor went back to the task at hand and eventually pulled down a towel and dropped it on top his brothers head and gently rubbed the wet locks dry.
“There is no need for apologies, you did not wake me.” Thor quirked a smile at loki, “you did wake the Valkyrie though.” Loki scoffed but had to look away and picked at his hands as his brother became more somber. “You should have told me you were not feeling well.”
“ I’m fine Thor.”
“I would believe you more if you looked at me when you said it.” Thor relaxed as he watched Loki roll his eyes with an exaggerated sigh before settling on glaring at him. Bratty was a good sign his brother was not too ill.
“I’m not ill, brother. I just...I had a bad dream is all.” Thor searched his brothers face trying to find any sign of hidden illness his brother could be trying to cover up. He didn’t find anything.
“A nightmare?” Loki grit his teeth.
“I suppose.” He ground out.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.” Loki snapped. Thor opened and closed his mouth as if he had thought better of commenting. Instead he pushed Loki forward and perched himself on the edge of the bath. He started to card his fingers through Loki’s long tangled hair, sectioning it into equal parts and started to weave it into a simple but elegant plait. Loki sat there and enjoyed the familiar motions. This was something he most often did for Thor when he was not feeling well. But Thor’s hair was too short to plait now and Loki’s had never been long enough in the past. How strange it was to have switched positions like this, he said as much and Thor huffed a laugh.
“Do not get used to it. It won’t happen again.” Loki smiled at the reply, the same reply he always gave to his brother in the past.
“Oh? AH!” Loki fell to his side as his brothers shove threw off his balance and dissolved into laughter.
“I wish we were young again, you were so sweet and did not yet understand sarcasm.” Thor looked wistful. Loki snorted.
“So you mean before I could talk.” He set himself off again, Thor’s deep laugh joining in. “You love my wit. I remember how much you used to appreciate it to get us out of trouble.”
“Aye. Or in trouble.” Thor swiped at Loki’s knee in a teasing manner. “And I still love it, and you.” The admission made Loki give pause.
Loki started at the ceiling before collecting himself enough to get up and clean up the small disarray they had caused in the bathroom. Once that was finished he made his way back to bed dodging the other rooms occupants, Thor close behind. He conjured a small vial and gave it to his brother as they settled into the covers.
“You said I did not wake you, I hope this helps you sleep.” Thor drank its contents without question. Loki soon found himself being pulled snug against his brothers chest like when he was still a kid. He tried pulling away but Thor had too good a hold on him. He gave in and relaxed into his brothers side. After a few quiet moments Loki poked his captor hard in the ribs where he knew was most ticklish, “Thor?”
“Hmm?” Thor groused.
“Just so you know,” Loki stated so softly he wasn’t sure Thor would hear, “I love you too.”
“ I know. ‘Never doubt that I love you’, right?” Loki would have scoffed at Thor’s arrogance if he wasn’t so confused. He had done some terrible things over the past few years. Terrible things to Thor, with the intention of driving him away or even harming him. Yet his brother never gave up on him, never stopped caring, and never stopped doubting his love. He had severely underestimated his brother it seems. Loki buried his face into Thor’s chest and nodded. Norns, he almost forgot that no one knew him better than Thor. Loki swore to himself he was going to try and fix this, he couldn’t change what he had already done, but he missed these moments between them. He wanted this part of his life back again and he was going to make the effort. He drifted off to the steady rhythm of his brothers breathing.