It was obvious from the way he looked at her. From the first moment they met something within his heart unlocked. Something that he hadn’t felt since before the ice. It was ridiculous, really. Who believes in love at first sight anymore? Plus it was too soon for him to be feeling this way, so he suppressed his feelings. New York needed saving. There was a bigger problem at hand.
It was obvious from the way she spoke to him. She was much better at hiding her feelings than he was. Honestly, she shouldn’t have let things get this far. She should have said no when Fury assigned them as partners, but she didn’t and now she was compromised. She was flattered at first, it’s not everyday that America’s hero fell head over heels in love with you, it was cute. That was the problem though. Love and cute, and her didn’t go together. That’s something more fitting for someone who wasn’t called the Black Widow. Yet she still found herself taking his bait every time he asked her to stay late to “discuss their mission.” She doesn’t miss the way his eyes lingering on her longer than appropriate. She sees all the warning signs, but she doesn’t listen. It isn’t until after S.H.I.E.L.D. has fallen that she finally admits it. She’s in too deep. She needs to leave.
Steve’s insomnia doesn’t get any better. Especially now knowing that Ultron is out there trying to destroy the world. Funny thing is he welcomes the threat. It gives him a mission. Something else to focus on. Lord knows he doesn’t need the stress, but it’s what keeps him going. While at Clint’s farm he does his best to figure out a plan. He argues with Tony, he talks to Clint and Laura—anyone but Banner and Romanoff. What happened to them? Since when were they on a last name basis? He shrugs the thought away and just keeps moving.
By nightfall he’s exhausted and his body’s telling him to rest. Maybe tonight’s the night that he won’t think about her, but he knows he’s failed once again. How could he not think about her? They’re under the same roof, she’s just within reach, yet he couldn’t bring himself to do so.
Not now.
Even with the possibility of the world ending, he couldn’t stop thinking about her.
Natasha tosses and turns on her bed. The accords were tearing them apart. That’s the reason why she couldn’t sleep. At least that’s what she tells herself. She doesn’t let her mind wander to the man who refuses to sign and is now a fugitive. It’s too late though, everything seems to always leads back to him. Especially if they’re apart. Nights like this were the worst. She wonders where he is and how he’s doing. Sometimes her thoughts of him consume her brain so much that she forgets to breathe. When she does finally catch her breath, she knows in her heart that she can’t just stand by. She knows what she has to do.
…
After the dust settles and Thanos is long gone, Steve and Natasha still remain outside. Both still in their gear, staying in the same spot where their friends have vanished. Neither of them speak. They just stay in each other’s company, being there for one another. Darkness has fallen upon them, only a few stars are out, as if the others were also wiped out by the snap. They look at each other knowing they both were thinking the same thing. Natasha breaks the silence, daring to finally speak the thoughts that were haunting her when the snap first happened.
“You know, when it happened and I saw everyone disappearing… I was scared. I was afraid that I would be left here, and that you would be gone…”
Steve takes her hand holding it in his, “I’m here. You’re here. We’re didn’t lose each other.”
She closes her eyes and nods her head.
“I really don’t know what I would’ve done if he took you too Nat. After all these years. Nights without sleep, and only thoughts of you. To finally be together again… if you were…”
He doesn’t finish the sentence. He didn’t have to. She knows how he felt all too well.
“I thought about you too. Every single night. Even when I knew I shouldn’t have.”
For the first time that day, they smiled. Tonight they would go without sleep once again, but at least they were together. The battle was lost, but there is still a war to be won. They would do it together.