The light is fading.
Darkness...
Everything was dark. No, this wasn't supposed to happen. He could barely recall his own name, what he did, or how he got here.
Stephen. It was Stephen, wasn't it? Or was it Steve, Stefan... He has no memory. A figure was approaching in the distance, and the man slowly backed up.
"I do no harm, i promise. My child, it is time." The entity had a cloak as dark as the abyss they stood in, and a scythe that look to be carved out of the moon itself. Once they got closer, the man examined their face, or lack thereof. No skin, no muscles, no eyes. just a skull.
"Who are you?" He asked the skeletal being.
"I am the personification of death. you may know me by my many other titles, most common being Lady Death or the Grim Reaper. It's time, Stephen." Stephen, his name was Stephen. His name seems hallow and empty to Him. who was he? Why was he called Stephen? What happened? He searched through his mind, desperate for answers, and all for naught. For the first time, he feels nothing at this moment. No pain, no happiness, no sorrow, no nothing.
"How did i.. die?" The word tastes bitter as it rests on the tip of Stephen's tongue. The concept of death, dying, an end, is always scary. It's beyond comprehension. Death held out a hand, to which Stephen hesitantly grabbed a hold of.
"You are one fickle spirit, Stephen. Time for us, it seemingly goes on forever, ad infinitum. But in reality, everything comes to an end. Even time itself, and your time has ran out. But this isn't the first time it has ran out for you, Stephen. we've crossed paths many times before in the past." Death's grip around Stephen's hand was surprisingly soft and gentle. It was... soothing. it's the first real emotion he's felt since he's died. Although he can't reminisce it entirely, it makes him think about all those possible happy memories he had while he still walked among st the living.
"Time is often compared to that of sand. it slips through your hands, yes, but you managed to prevent that from happening. you kept all the sand in the palm of your hand- without spilling a single grain. We've met many times before in the past, Stephen. and we might meet many more times in the future, as well." That caused Stephen to think. has he really died numerous times before?
"So, what makes this death any different from the rest, then?" Stephen asked. The reaper hummed as they continued to walk. They could see a faint, blinding light ahead.
"It could be permanent, but with you, i can never tell. Stephen, you are unlike any human I've ever seen before. None have ever died as many times as you."
"Is that a good feat, or a bad one?" Stephen responded, and it causes death's jaw to clench up, in a attempt to smile.
"Depends. I have missed your jokes."
After walking in silence for a few minutes, they approached the light ahead. It was a hazy forest. Stephen could see a few spirits wandering aimlessly around, wishing to find out who they are.
"Come along. The place where we stand is one of many parts of the afterlife. This place specifically, houses spirits and souls who died a traumatic death, and have thus forgotten everything. If you wish to follow me, you can reclaim your memories. if not, this is where you will rest until you are avenged. We call this the forest of the Departed." Death walks down the dirt path deeper into the forest. They walk for what seems like forever, until they approach a giant statue holding a mirror, the statue is old and brittle, so there's no way to tell who it was.
"Gaze into the mirror, Stephen." Stephen slowly walks up towards the mirror, and sees a reflection. his reflection. is this what he looked like? He looked at the figure staring back at him. neatly cut beard, stunning eyes that seemed to house the stars, black hair with white streaks in it, and he was sporting an intricate blue robe. looking at his hands, there seems to be a bunch of scars going down the fingers, but he feels no pain. Is this who he is? who he was? The memories are too hazy, but they seem to be returning.
"God, is this who I am? Who I was?” He looked at the figure in the mirror with distrust.
“Yes, that is you.” Death stood behind Stephen and rested a hand on his shoulder.
“I have so many questions.”
“And I may have the answers.” Death’s soothing, feminine voice was the only thing preventing him from breaking down and crying right where he stood.
“You mentioned... past deaths?” Stephen turned his head around to face the skeleton.
“I have. I’ve shown up to claim you many times in the past, but you managed to overcome it. There was a long string of brief encounters, for sure.”
“I just don’t... want this to be my final death. I’m not prepared.” Stephen’s shoulders sulk, and he looks down at his feet.
“No one ever is.” Death reassured.
“Another question- is there a way for me to recover my memories?” Stephen asked. The reaper responded with a nod.
“...Yes. There even is a way, to return to the surface world, if you wish.”
“Really?” Stephen’s eyes lit up for the first time in forever. He felt a couple new emotions. Hope, joy, excitement.
”I must warn you, though. If you succeed, you will be revived. If not, your spirit will be left destroyed and ripped apart.” Death conveyed a somber tone.
“What needs to be done?”
“Near the edge of the realm, There's a long abandoned tower that is seeped in magic. There, I will preform a ritual. It has the power to bring back someone from death, but only if they are deemed worthy after a series of trials.” Death walked away from the mirror and over to a rocking chair. Stephen sat across from them.
“Trials?” Stephen asked.
“I don’t remember the last time it’s been used, but the trials are mostly fighting your inner demons and guilt. On recovering your memories, if you wish, touch the mirror, and your memories should flow back to you. It may be a bit... traumatic.”
“I’ll be fine, don’t worry.”
“Close your eyes, Stephen, and place your hand on the Mirror.” Death whispered. Stephen did as he was told and put up a hand to the mirror.
Suddenly, Stephen was transported to a sunny beach. He looked around at all the humans, until he spotted a young boy who looked like him, playing in the sand with a girl.
“Donna, this will be the best sandcastle ever!” The boy flashed a huge smile.
“Donna...” Stephen muttered. The scene changed, and he was standing at some sort of funeral. That young boy from before was there too, but the girl was nowhere to be seen. The boy was sobbing into the arms of what seemed to be his mother.
“I could have saved her. It’s all my fault.” The boy said between sobs as his mother sprouted a few tears of her own. Stephen felt himself starting to cry, too. Everything was slowly rushing back. He then found himself standing in a prestigious university, watching a young, dashing man get his diploma and doctorate. Next thing, he was standing in a hospital. The man from before was working on an operation table with a young woman. Memories started to flood back. Was this him, the entire time? Next thing he was in a car, and everything went upside down. He watched himself cry over his scarred hands. He watched himself push everyone out of his life, suffering. All these people and events he knew were slowly coming back to him. Donna, Christine, Nicodemus. The flight to Kathmandu, the meeting with the Ancient One, training with his mentor and best friend Mordo, Stealing some books from Wong’s library, fighting Kaecilius and his acolytes, watching the Ancient One die, his encounters and many, many deaths against Dormammu.
But it didn’t end. He watched himself get tortured by Ebony Maw, fighting Thanos alongside Tony Stark, Peter Parker, and the Guardians. Stephen found himself staring at the fight in front of him on the planet Titan.
He just wanted it to all stop. He watched himself die again by handing the Time Stone over exchange for Tony’s life. He remembers Thanos’ death, and the joyous celebration that happened afterward to help patch up the psychological damage that happened.
The next scene, Stephen was at a party, wearing a nice suit for the first time in forever. All the Avengers were celebrating the victory over Thanos. As he looked into the past, he watched himself talk with Tony, Peter, Rhodey and Bruce. Everyone looked so.. relieved. It might have been the alcohol, but Thor’s Valkyrie friend chugged most of that in one sitting.
“Why did you trade the stone for my life?” Tony asked.
“I had to, as I said before-“
“There is no other way, I know.” Tony looked down.
“The Avengers need you, Tony. Look here, everyone is safe and sound because of you. You were the key to defeating Thanos.” The Stephen of the past had changed from a cheery tone to a more serious one.
“Not everything ended up happy and cheery. I’m now Tony Stark, defender of the universe, single and miserable.” Tony ducked his head in shame.
“I know Pepper still loves me, but being Iron Man is too important for me to give up. Maybe we were best off as friends, anyways.” Stephen put a hand on Tony’s shoulder, causing the shorter man to blush.
”Believe me when I say that I have experience in bad break-ups.” Stephen gave a weak smile, causing Tony to laugh for the first time in awhile.
”Look at us, two old and broken men, who can’t hold a relationship together.” Tony tried to make a light-hearted joke.
”We’re quite the pair, that’s for sure.” Stephen chuckled. Tony looked straight up into Stephen’s beautiful eyes, getting lost in the swirls of green and blue. They slowly moved closer together. The real Stephen watched the scene unfold before his eyes, mouth agape. Soon, Tony was pressed up against Stephen’s chest. A couple people in the room stopped talking as they watched the two men lovingly stare at each other. They didn’t notice, they were too wrapped up in the moment.
“We are a great pair.” Tony whispered. Stephen blushed, and the two of them closed the gap between them. Looking back on the memory, Stephen didn’t realize how many people were shocked about them kissing.
"Shit, I owe Wong twenty dollars." Rhodey muttered to himself.
“About damn time.” Sam muttered.
“Shut up Sam, let them have their moment.” Bucky responded.
"i just wish i could have my own moment, man." To Sam's surprise, Bucky planted a kiss on his cheek.
"Ew, Gross! You've touched Steve with those! I don't want your super-soldier diseases!" Sam was blushing, and Steve was laughing so hard he was crying. Watching that memory made Stephen smile, everyone looked so happy, so peaceful. It made him realize how much he missed these people. a couple memories quickly followed suit, like the time Peter accidentally called Tony 'Dad', Helping him with his science homework, Watching Wong lipsync to Beyonce, Defeating inter dimensional threats, and going out for food afterwards with Tony and Peter.
Unfortunately, all good things must come to a stop. Next thing he knew, Stephen was standing in a New York street. A gigantic alien creature and it’s followers were terrorizing the city, and the Avengers had to stop it.
“I’ll fend off the smaller ones, you guys go for the broodmother!” Steve yelled.
“There’s too many of them!” Sam yelled as he shot a few down with his guns. He watched Iron Man and Spider Man attack the alien queen to no avail, until Thor and... himself showed up.
“Backup has arrived!” Natasha announced.
Everything was going smoothly until the alien queen reared up for a final attack. He was fighting it with grace and raw power, until he watched Peter get hit out of the sky.
"Peter!" Distracted, he turned around only to take a huge blow to the chest, collapsing to the ground. The alien queen moved closer to Peter, going in for the killing blow. Stephen's blood was pumping, and his adrenaline kicked in. He pushed the boy out of the way, sending the cloak to protect him, and taking his place. The cloak once it moved Peter out of the way rushed to it's master's aid, but the Alien's corrosive claws tore through it like butter, and stabbing Stephen in the chest. He collapsed to the ground.
"Mister Str-Stephen?! NO! Dad- Karen, activate Instant Kill mode." The last things he heard and saw was Peter scrambling to protect him whilst choking on his own words, and the broodmother screeching in agony, as a repulsor beam from Peter's suit fired straight into it's heart.
Suddenly, he was standing in front of the statue again, looking at his expression in the mirror.
"So, that's how I died..." Stephen muttered. He was trying his best to contain the tears, but once he found himself in a hug from the Grim Reaper, he just let himself go.
“I always thought the Grim Reaper was a lot more merciless than this. I thought you just... claimed the souls and leave.” Stephen tried to chuckle between sniffles.
“Death is often a feared thing, so I understand why they would twist the truth. I merely guide the newly departed and keep everything in balance between light and death.”
“Changing the topic, where is this... tower located?” Stephen’s memories are somewhat settling in again. It’s quite a new thing for him- to forget, as his photographic memory does anything but forget. He’s just hoping he can recall most and all of his spells by the time he gets to the relic, just encase.
“It’s quite the journey. It’s lair is in the deepest part of the area here, far beyond where spirits wander. Everything there, has been warped, inverted and twisted because of the overflow of magic. Compared to the surface world, where most things are based around nature, the underworld and the heavens above are based on a more, arcanic nature. It's somewhat similar to a lush rain forest, if you think about it.” Death’s jawbone clenched. "We best get going now." The two walked out deeper into the forest, following an old dirt path. The forest had a somber yet peaceful aura to it. Stephen glanced upwards to the sky, it was pitch black, like a warm summer night, except for the lack of stars in the sky.
"I wish I could take Tony here." Stephen muttered, all the memories he has of the man are still coming back to him, but he does miss him dearly, as with all his friends.
"Is he a friend of yours? I've met many Tony's before in the past. I might have even met him" Death asked, and Stephen's breath hitched.
"Yes... He's a good friend of mine. You probably have met him a couple times. I just wish to see him again, and before something bad happens. I fear for his health while i'm...dead." Stephen rubs the back of his neck with a hand. It's still a foreign concept that they no longer shake, but it's probably because spirits can't feel pain.
"Love is a powerful emotion, isn't it?" Death did the closest thing to a smile as she could, and Stephen responded with a nod. The two kept walking until they reached the end of the dirt path. The peaceful aura in the air seemed off, this time. the farther they strayed off the path, the darker it got. The further they walked through the forest, the more warped everything became. Trees were twisted in crude fashions, rocks floated, and the remains of what looks to be a village that housed spirits was ripped from reality itself. Stephen has been to a lot of freaky places and dimensions, and this is unfortunately one of the worse places he's been. Everything seemed... corrupted. It reminded him slightly of his encounters with Dormmamu.
“Who else, besides your friend Tony, do you miss?” Death asked as they walked down the gravel path.
“I got rid of most of my contacts after the accident, except for Christine. No matter how much stuff I put her through, she was always there for me, and I thank her eternally for that. When I flew to Kathmandu to learn magic, it was my mentor Mordo who saved me from muggers. He was my first real friend, after my crash. Then there was the Ancient One, and she reminds me of you. I lost... both of them. Mordo walked away from magic and the Ancient One died.” Stephen was sniffling a bit, but he continued. “Wong is the librarian at Kamar-Taj, and is my only sorcerer friend now. There’s the boy that Tony practically adopted, Peter. Those are all who I was really close with.”
“Friendships and relationships are such an important aspect of our life, we should cherish every moment we have with our friends, because we can never know if it will be our last.” Death replied.
“I still don’t understand why you take such a liking to me.” Stephen asked.
“I’ll be honest, I’ve met you many times in the past, and every time you end up living in the end. I did tell you it was time when you first woke up here today, but I feel as if you are stuck in an endless cycle of life and death. I wish for most poor souls that they live their life to the fullest before their time. There is so many young people who had their lives taken from them, and I just wish to let them live. But I don’t control death. I merely guide the spirits to their resting place. I tend to lead spirits to their friends and family so they can rest easy, and I am leading you to yours.
“What about... my sister?” Those words hurt to speak.
“Your sister? She is very proud of you. I once talked to her after you fought Dormammu, and she couldn’t be prouder of who you are.” Stephen hid his gaze with a hand.
”I just wish I could have saved her...” He says in a meek voice.
“The good always die young.” Death said in a somber tone.
The two kept walking until they saw what looks to be the remains of a tower on the horizon. As they approached the tower, Stephen made note that behind it, the ground just... vanishes and looks like the abyss Stephen woke up in.
Death opened the old, rickety door and gestured to let the sorcerer in first. She closed the door behind them and settled onto the ground.
“What you will be facing is a creation from the deepest parts of your mind. Succeed, and your body will be reanimated. Fail, and your spirit could be destroyed for eternity. Are you really sure you are up for this, Stephen?” Death said in a concerned tone. Stephen sat down on his knees and nodded.
“As ready as I’ll ever be.” If his spirit form had a beating heart, it’d be pounding out of his chest right now. Death summoned a magical grimoire and began reciting a spell in a long forgotten language, causing the floor to glow green around them, and for her eye sockets to glow with power. Lady Death placed her fingertips onto Stephen’s forehead. He closed his eyes and awaited what happens next with caution.
Stephen felt similar to when he glanced into his memories, only more... empty. To his surprise, the cloak sat on his shoulders, although it seems to be dormant. Stephen looked around, and all he saw was a corpse on the ground. He walked towards it, to inspect it. The body belonged to a dead sorcerer, and not just any sorcerer, but the acolyte of Kaecilius that he killed in the New York Sanctum long ago. He shuddered, reaching to turn the body over to see it’s face. But, the corpse turned into Mordo, lying still and emotionless on the ground.
“This is just my imagination...” Stephen muttered to himself. The words of his mentor echoed in his mind after he killed the zealot.
These Zealots will snuff us all out, and you can’t muster the strength to snuff them out first?
What if Mordo died? The reason why he walked away from sorcery and magic in the first place is all because of Stephen. He stood there, looking into Mordo's dead eyes, without saying a word.
He knows the man is till out there. It wasn't his fault that his mentor walked away from magic. He placed a hand on Mordo's face, and closed his eyes.
"I already regret this." Stephen says out loud, but no answer. He's all alone.
"Please, Somebody, Help!" He hears a masculine voice from behind him, and he turns around. It's an old man, wo gets on his knees infront of Stephen and begs.
"My wife... she's dying! She needs a doctor!" The man looked at Strange with fear in his eyes, tears forming.
"I..."
"Please, you have got to help her!" Stephen remembers that surgery. He spent many hours trying to help his wife, who had been brutally injured in a car crash, only for her to end up dying twelve hours later. And all he could think about, was how the lady messed up his perfect record.
The man breaks down and starts sobbing. he lets out a wail of pain and sorrow, and Stephen tries to console him. His sense were starting to overload. He watched Kaecilius kick the Ancient One into a portal, and all that follows is the sound of glass breaking her fall and shattering. The sobbing man suddenly turns into fragments of glass, just like when his window-shield broke when he crashed his car. Kaecilius looks him dead in the eye, before turning into glass shards too, but this time, reminiscent of the needles Ebony Maw tortured him with. A few of them came flying in his direction, piercing through his skin, causing him to cry out in pain. He hears a deep Laughter, and soon, the glass on his neck slowly turns into Thanos, Starting at the Infinity Gauntlet. Thanos is now choking him, and breaks the Eye of Agamotto. Thanos goes to speak, but instead, Tony's voice comes out.
"Why did you do that?" He hears Tony's guilt and sorrow when Stephen exchanged the Time Stone for his life. But all Stephen could see on Tony's face was the expressionless gaze of the Mad Titan.
"It... Was.. the only way." Stephen choked out.
The endgame.
Thanos released him, letting him fall to the ground. He lay there, still.
There's got to be a way to overcome this. There must be a way. Everything was coming back to haunt him. He heard himself scream. Many, many times at the hands of Dormammu. He heard Donna's screams, as Stephen tried to rescue her from drowning in a pool. Wong lie dead in the rubble where he found him in Hong Kong. He remembers
All this pain, all this sorrow... It was his fault.
And this is the part where you apologize.
"Chris...tine." Stephen barely manages to speak. She's right. Maybe this is the part where he apologizes.
He slowly stands up. He remembers resurrecting Wong, He remembers the joy on Tony's face after Peter and him reunited. He remembers the Ancient One teaching him a valuable lesson about life before she died. He remembers the road to recovery after the crash, He remembers making amends with Christine.
He remembers.
Mordo's choice wasn't his to make. If he didn't kill that zealot, he would have died. He saved the world, twice. Even if the only was was to let Thanos win. He's died so many times, what makes this so hard to overcome now? The cycle just goes on and on...
Suddenly, Mordo and the Ancient One are standing in front of him.
"We don't lose our demons, Mordo. We only learn to live above them." The Ancient One says in a stern, yet calm voice.
He's got to live above his demons. These past traumas, they will always be there with him. But Stephen cannot dwell on the past and his mistakes for so long. He needs to live above them.
"These are just my inner demons, and i can live above them." He mutters. He watches himself fighting Dormmamu, finally causing the monster to yield and leave earth. Everything slowly starts to calm down. Kaecilius reappears, and goes to fight him, but is pulled away into the Dark Dimension. He comes to part with Donna's death, as he recalls earlier Death told him that she was proud of him, and who he was. The crying man from before reappears, and hugs him.
"Im sorry. Im sorry for everything." Stephen starts crying.
"You did your best, I know you did. you are not at fault. Thank you, Doctor." The man says, before fading away.
"Thank you, Stephen." He hear's Death's voice one last time.
Stephen jolts upwards, heart pacing. he places his hands to his chest. They're... shaking. He's sitting in some sort of bed. Where is he?
"Stephen? STEPHEN!" He hears from the hallways of the hospital, and the rush of feet. Tony Stark.
"Tony?" Stephen is interrupted by a big hug, causing him to almost fall out of the bed. Tony is sobbing on his hospital gown.
"You died, you died, you died on me..." He hears Tony mutter between sobs. Stephen kisses his forehead lightly. Peter Parker soon follows into the morgue.
"Ugh, I've always hated the morgue." Stephen tries to joke. He watches as Peter comes into the room with Steve Rogers, Wong and Carol Danvers. They all look as if they've been crying.
"DOCTOR STRANGE! YOU'RE ALIVE!" Peter rushes to join the hug. He has a ripped cloak of levitation on his shoulders, who’s currently still. Stephen will probably have to repair it later tonight.
"I think i'm going to wait my turn." Steve makes a light-hearted chuckle. "Once you got stabbed by the monster, Tony quickly disposed of it. If it weren't for you, Peter, and probably a few others would have been dead." Steve brushes a few tears out of his eyes.
"I would put my life down to protect any of you guys. No questions asked." Stephen tells Tony and Peter to let go, as he's losing circulation in his arm.
"Steve and the rest of the Avengers brought you some flowers. It was Rhodey's idea." Carol handed Stephen a bouquet.
"We should really get out of the Morgue. Stephen stands up slowly, and magically changes back into robes.
"This calls for a party at Avengers headquarters, tonight. the 'My Wizard Boyfriend is alive and we couldn't be any happier' party. I'll make sure there's plenty of drinks to go around! And Peter, if i see you touching any bottle of wine tonight, i will 'yeet' you, as the kids say, back to May's!" Tony smiled.
"I thought you told me you drank at parties when you were his age." Steve responded, causing Wong to snort.
"Shush!"
"Did you just refer to me as 'your wizard boyfriend?'" Stephen raises a brow, and Tony turns bright red.
"Maybe."
"For once, i kinda like your stupid name-calling." Stephen laughs, and they both lean into kiss, but are interrupted by Peter.
"Gross! can't you two save that for the Party, Mister Stark?"
"I agree with the kid, if you two are going to kiss in front of me, i'm leaving." Wong responded. He had a few tear stains on his cheek.
"Oh come on you two, Stephen just came back to life. Let them kiss." Steve laughs.
"We'll leave you two be and we'll tell everyone the good news, although, I probably wouldn't kiss in a morgue, though..." Carol and the rest leave the room and head to the lobby, where the Avengers are all mourning.
"I mean, both of the Captains's got a point." Tony laughs. Stephen portals them to a forest, and spells them clean from anything in the morgue.
"This place reminds me of somewhere i want to show you someday, i'll have to ask a friend of mine if i can take you there." Stephen moves closer to the other man and grabs onto Tony's waist.
"Sounds like a plan. Anyways, so how did you exactly come back to life?" Tony asks.
"I've died many times. All i had to do was overcome my inner demons. And cry a lot."
"Is one of your inner demons a drunken Wong lip syncing to Single Ladies at 3AM?" Tony presses his chest to Stephen's and looks up at the man's face, and the sorcerer laughs.
"Oh, how i missed you." Stephen closes the gap between them, kissing the other man passionately. The shorter man reaches up and places a hand on his neck, pulling him closer. He ran a shaking hand through Tony's hair, wishing for this moment to never end. He didn't realize how much he missed love, affection, and friendship in the land of the Departed. He hopes to talk to Death again one day, but for now, He wants to live in the present, with all his friends the Avengers, his somewhat illegitimate son Peter, and his mechanic boyfriend Tony Stark. They both break apart slowly.
"You've got a lot of explaining to do tonight at the Party there, Houdini. I'm sure even Loki would be jealous about your skills in death." Tony reaches out and cups Stephen's cheek.
"I'm sure he would. but for now, the Party can wait. i want to spend some time with you." Stephen pressed a light kiss onto Tony's lips.
"True, but if we don't get back soon, Rhodey will personally fly over here and drag us back."
"I'd like to see him try." Stephen starts to make a portal back to the hospital.
"Promise you won't leave me again, Stephen?" Tony asks before walking into the portal.
"Tony, not even Death could make us part."