Chapter 8
"Come in, make yourself at home." Serena said as they got back to her house which she shared with her Dad.
"Thank you."
"I'll get some plates and the forks." Bernie went into the lounge and looked around the room. There were various pictures on the wall of Serena and her Dad.
"There you go." Serena said as she came into the lounge. "
"I'm famished." Bernie said as they tucked into the food. "Isn't that the lady who works behind the reception?"
"Yes, that's my Auntie Paulette. And her son Jason. He works with me too."
"It's a family affair then."
"It sure is."
"Haven't you got any pictures of your Mum?"
"No. Dad got rid of them all when she left. I don't even know what she looks like."
"That must be so hard for you."
"Not really what I've never had I can't really miss can I?"
"Come here." Bernie held out her arm and Serena siged contently as she snuggled up to Bernie.
"This feels nice."
"Mmm."
"SERENA." Serena moved away from Bernie as Raymond called out her name.
"I'M IN THE LOUNGE Dad."
"Hello you two." Raymond smiled.
"Hi Dad. Are you alright?"
"Yep. Are you?"
"Yes Bernie came to the work as I was closing up so I invited her round. Is that OK?"
"Of course it's OK. This is your home you don't have to ask. Right, I'm off to my room to watch football."
"Ok Dad."
"Have fun you two."
"I won't be a minute." Serena got off the sofa and left the room. "Dad, wait."
"What's wrong sweetheart?"
"You really don't mind Bernie being here?"
"I've just said I don't."
"It's just she turned up at work and told me that she couldn't stop thinking about me. And then she kissed me."
"Well that's good isn't it?"
"It is but I'm also scared Dad. I really like her but what if she ends up hurting me just like Shannon did."
"I don't think you've got anything to worry about on that score. Bernie seems like a lovely girl. Just talk to her."
"Thanks Dad. I love you."
"I love you more than anything in this world." Raymond said as he hugged Serena tightly. "No go on, don't leave the poor lass in the lounge on her own." Serena smiled as she went back into the lounge.
"Is everything OK?" Bernie asked as Serena sat down beside her.
"I hope so." Serena said as she put her lips to Bernie's and kissed her softly.
"Do you want tea or coffee?" Serena said as she went into the kitchen.
"What did you say?" Bernie asked as she stood at the kitchen door.
"I said," Do you want tea or coffee? Or something stronger?"
"Coffee please, I don't really drink alcohol, except for the odd whiskey." Bernie watched Serena as she poured the milk into the cups. Bernie then couldn't resist walking over and wrapping her arms around Serena's waist from behind. "You are so beautiful." Bernie said as Serena leaned into her.
"Please stop saying that."
"Why."
"Because it's not true."
"It is true." Bernie turned Serena around so she could look at her. "I wish you could see what I can see when I look at you. You are perfect."
"No I'm not. You're perfect. And far, far too good for me. I think you should leave."
"Why." Bernie said sadly as she took Serena's hands in hers but Serena pulled them away.
"Because I've asked you to."
"Why."
"BECAUSE I'M NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU." Serena shouted as she began to pace the kitchen. "No one will ever want me. Want this." Serena pointed at herself disgusted. "I am fat and Ugly, I can't ever do anything right. I don't deserve to be loved. Now will you please just go. I deserve to be on my own."
"No you don't. Who the hell has told you all this about yourself. Because let me tell you they are wrong on every level." Bernie put her arms around Serena's waist. "Why don't we go in the lounge and we can talk, yeah."
"Yeah." Serena wiped her eyes as they both went into the lounge.
As soon as they got into the lounge Bernie pulled Serena to her so they snuggled up together. They sat in silence until Serena broke that silence.
"It was Shannon, my Ex. When I first met her she was lovely. She treated me so well. She would always shower me with gifts and flowers. But when I started staying over more at her place she instantly changed. She would pick at everything I did. Nothing I did was right for her. If I said I was going home she would kick off and say that I was a Daddy's girl. And it's no wonder my Mum left me."
"That's bang out of order."
"She didn't seem to think so. She used to get the dig all the time. One day after we had sex. I got out of bed to get dressed and she said my God aren't you fat. I was so shocked. I know I'm not twiggy but I didn't think I was fat."
"You're not. You don't have to tell me anymore if it's too upsetting for you."
"It is but I want to tell you. I can't carry this around forever. It's not healthy is it?"
"No sweetheart." Bernie said as she held onto Serena tighter. "
"The name calling started to get worse and worse until one day I had enough. And I told her that I didn't want to be with her anymore. And she pushed me up against the wall and told me that if I left her that no one else would ever want me because I was fat and ugly and no one would ever find me remotely attractive. I was so scared of her. But I had no choice; she wouldn't let me leave her. But the name calling got worse and worse until my Dad saw the change in me. I used to be so confident but she's knocked all that out of me." Serena cried as she held onto Bernie's shirt."One day I saw her kissing someone else, so I plucked up the courage while the other girl was there to tell her that we were finished. And not to come near me ever again."
"And did she do as you told her?"
"She came to our house kicking off but my Dad and my Uncle Don went to the door and told her if she ever came near me again then they would call the police. I haven't seen her since thank God."
"Look at me." Bernie said as Serena sat up and looked at Bernie shyly. "That bitch is nothing but a bully. I am absolutely fuming at what she has done and said to you. Because none of it is true. I would never treat you like that. Let me help you. Let me show you how you should be loved." Bernie said as she pulled Serena to her and hugged her tightly.