Falling Stars

Today is Tom’s last day in L.A. before he flies off for the press tour of Avenger’s Infinity War. He came over to my house and asked if we could walk around. I asked Darnell to come along with us because I found it rude to just leave him in the house. Also, because I needed a little back-up just in case I choked. I had this idea of telling Tom about how I felt. I was just waiting for the right moment and if the right moment came while we were out, I needed some back-up.

However, once we were out, Darnell all of a sudden had some “errands” AGAIN. Of course, that meant he was finding an excuse for Tom and I to be alone. I knew it was him big brother-ing me. I told you, he knows me so well. I didn’t have to tell him that I had plans to tell Tom. That and because him and my mom talked about it behind my back. They did it because they cared, I know that. They’re all rooting for me. It’s just me who isn’t rooting for me. Walking on a red carpet was a different form of confidence than telling someone you like them.

I just need some sign, a green light to press on the gas and say ‘hey dude, I like you.’ Anything, give me something, universe.

Tom and I passed by a comic book store. He grabbed my hand and pulled me into it so fast that I started to see stars.

“Omg! Look at these!!” He was still holding my hand when we started looking through the comic books and only had let go when he jumped to another pile excitedly. I watched him as he moved around the store like The Flash (not the bully, the superhero), like there was something more interesting in the next pile and the next pile. He looked so cute running around and I could feel a smile creep up my face reminding me of how hard I fell for this boy. I mean, look at him. Who wouldn’t fall for him? Could he blame me?

“Hey!” Tom said, coming up to me.

“What?”

“Do you want that?” He pointed to the comic I had pulled out midway. I didn’t notice I was even holding it. I must have stood there like a deer in headlights - frozen. The whole time Tom was looking at comics, I was only looking at him. I inserted the comic back from where I got it.

“Nah…I was just looking at it.” I shrugged.

“Okay, good because I got you something better!” He pulled me towards the cashier.

“Hey Mike! Do you have it?”

“Hey Tom! Yeah I got it here!” who I am assuming is Mike was talking, a white guy in his late 30’s. He opened a slide door behind the cash register and emerged with a box full of comics. He dropped it on a table and had his back to us.

“Of course you’re the special lady he reserved this for!” Mike teased. He was talking to me when he turned to face us. In his hand, brought out in front of me was a Spider-man comic book. Not just any comic book. The very first one.

“Oh. I guess?,” I replied to Mike. I looked at Tom who wouldn’t look up at me and his big ears were starting to turn pink.

“Good haggler this one! He’s a keep—”

“Ha-ha! Okay… Thanks again Mike but we really have to go.”

“Right. Right. Do you want me to uh…put it inside a paper bag?”

“Z?” Tom asked me.

“Yes please!” I said.

Mike mumbled as he grabbed a paper bag and slid my comic book in,. “This is really one of a kind. You must be something, I mean your miss Zendaya, but would I give up…this comic book for any gal?” he said under his breath but loud enough that I could hear him but I was sure that Tom could hear him too.

“Uhhh thanks again Mike, see you soon man” Tom said as he quickly picked up the paper bag and went straight for the door.

“Wait! Wait! Tom!” I said lagging behind him. He stopped and I was able reach out for the paper bag. “What’s your hurry?”

“Oh. Nothing. Sorry. Yeah. You didn’t even get to…”

We moved out of the doorway and stood outside the comic book shop. I pulled the comic book from inside the paper bag and looked at it again. I couldn’t believe Tom got this for me. Several thoughts ran through my head.

I didn’t even know these still existed and right under my nose! There was one here in L.A.? This must’ve cost a fortune! Did he get one for himself too? I mean, he should be the one keeping this? He’s spider-man! Yeah, I’m a big fan and I’m not even being biased. Before, I got the role of Michelle, my favorite superhero has always been spider-man but—

“I can’t believe you got this for me…” I whispered under my breath, still staring at the comic book in mint condition still wrapped in plastic. “Amazing Fantasy” it read on the cover. “12 cents,” the little logo read and I touched it with my finger.

“Do you like it?” I looked up at and saw Tom with his big brown eyes staring back at me.

“I love it…” I smiled at him and gave him a hug. When we let go I said, “So you’ve been here before?” I pointed at the comic book store.

“Yeah, I mean. A couple of times,” he shrugged.

“Uh-huh. Couple times that the guy at the cashier already knows your name?”

“It’s an easy name to remember…”

“So I’m guessing it was just a coincidence that we passed by here too huh?”

“No. Okay,” he admitted with his head hung low. “I planned it but hey, it’s our last day hanging out together! I wanted to give you something spe— nice. Give you something…nice…”

“This…this is more than nice! Thank you Tom! This really means a lot. I can’t believe you! How did you even get this? Did you get one for yourself?”

“No..uh..it was just one copy and I wanted to give it to you. I know how much you like Spider-man.”

You mean you…how much I like you…

“But you’re Spider-man! Don’t you want this for yourself?”

“Nah… I really got it for you.” He put his hands in his pockets and his ears were still pink moving towards red now. I wondered if this was it. Was this the green light to tell Tom how I felt? Would any guy, who didn’t feel something for his friend, actually go out his way and do this? Can I still say he was just being nice? To be honest, I’ve only known him for less than two years and yet I spend almost every second I can with him. If he didn’t feel the same way, why spend this much time with me? He could literally get any girl, any girl he wants…

“Hey Tom!” It was Mike. He walked out of the comic book store and asked Tom if he could take a picture with the Spider-man statue.

“Sure, man!,” Tom said as he moved to the side of the Spider-man statue who was wearing the hoodie from our fictional high school in Spider-man: Homecoming. I didn’t even notice it because Tom was too excited to get into the comic book store. We admired it for a bit saying how cool it was they got all the details.

“They didn’t get one thing though…your height.” I used my hands to show the difference between Tom’s height and the statue’s.

“Shut up, Zendaya! Let’s just take the picture.”

“Nah, you go ahead. You can take a picture. You’re Spider-man!” I said stepping back. He can have this moment. He already gave me the comic book. I didn’t even think of a going away present. I mean, we could still talk to each other on the phone. It’s not like he’s going to be gone forever and we were still just friends, right? There’s no point getting sentimental. Unless…I looked at the comic book in my hand, already inside the paper bag.

“Hey, why don’t you join your boyfriend?,” said Mike and he nudged me.

“Oh. He’s not—“
“Mike…”

Tom and I said at the same time.

“Just go!” and with that Mike pushed me towards Tom.

“Come on, Z!”

“Go!” Mike encouraged, “Spider-man needs his MJ!”

“Yeah…” Tom said quietly.

I walked over and took the picture.

———

Darnell caught up with us and we decided to drive back home to my place. We ordered some take out because lord knows none of us can cook for shit. My kitchen is literally only used when my family comes over. Other than that, the refrigerator is the only appliance that gets noticed on a daily basis.

The sun was going down and Darnell decided to take Noon out for a walk. Ha get it because his name is Noon for afternoon… so…you know….never mind. Usually I would do it but Noon needs the exercise that only Darnell could give because I cannot run any faster than .05 km/hour. Okay, I don’t know if that’s the exact speed but you get my point, I don’t walk fast nor do I run.

I walked them out the door but before they left Darnell had asked me if I had told Tom about my feelings already.

“No…”

“Why not? What are you waiting for, Z?”

“Shhh… keep your voice down.” Tom was just in the living room going through Netflix. He didn’t seem to hear us or he would’ve asked why we were whispering.

“I need…time…”

“He’s leaving tomorrow. There is no better time! If he likes you, y’all can be cute on the phone and if he doesn’t, you don’t have to see him for like what? Three months?”

“Well! I need a sign then! Like a go signal. I can’t just come up to him and be like ‘oh yeah by the way I like you bro ha-ha’” I raised my eyebrows at Darnell to make my point.

“Zendeesha, listen, you don’t need signs” Noon was starting to pull at Darnell. “But if you still need it, it’s everywhere. The boy likes you, Z. Stop making him wait…Like how I’m making Noon wait.” Noon was becoming restless. “I’ll see you guys in awhile.” Darnell ran off before I even got a word in.

I closed the door and walked towards the living room. I plopped myself down on the couch beside Tom. He moved his arm behind my shoulders. Do I do it now?

“What movie are we watching?” Tom asked without even looking away from the T.V.

Or I could do it later…

We couldn’t decide what movie to watch so we started searching with out phones but easily got distracted when I found a meme on Twitter. Eventually, we never got to watching a movie. We just kept passing our phones to each other, looking for the funniest things the Internet had to offer.

“Ooooh…what’s this?”

“What?” I crawled over to his side of the couch and looked at his phone. It was a video from my app of me looking through my keepsake box that someone had reposted on Instagram.

“What’s a keepsake box?” Tom asked.

“It’s like a box of memories. You put little stuff in them from all your memorable moments.”

Tom was still watching the short clip of what was a longer video. It cuts exactly before I show the love letters that my ex had given me before.

“Aww! I wanna see the rest of what’s in it!,” Tom says to his phone before he turns to me to say, “D’you still have it?”

“Sure…” I said a little apprehensively. “It’s upstairs…” I didn’t understand where the fear was coming from but my gut was telling me it wasn’t a good idea to unbox a bunch of stuff my ex had given me. I mean, the whole box wasn’t filled with things he gave me but there was enough items to make the situation weird. Nonetheless, I lead Tom to the storage room where things like gowns I wore when I was 16 to items I had even before I got famous were kept. They were inside these neatly piled plastic boxes that looked like big tupperwares. Still, there were things lying around and it took me awhile to find my keepsake box. Once I grabbed it, I sat on the floor and Tom followed suit.

“Let’s see…” I picked up the first thing on there, which was the 3D glasses from watching the Amazing Spider-man movie.

“Oh cool!” Tom said as he got the glasses from my hand. “I saw this in the video! Your first date was to this right?” He looked up at me.

“Yup…” My voice was another pitch higher again.

“Cool…” Tom tried it on and then set it aside. He picked up another item inside my box. The letters were still at the bottom so it would take us awhile to get to them. Hopefully, we never get to them.

“You really like going to the movies, huh?” Tom commented on the amount of movie tickets inside the box. Some were already fading and you couldn’t make out what it said.

“It says….’The Lost City of Z’” Tom said.

“It does not!”

“That’s a really good film. I heard there’s a really amazing bloke on there. Really talented. Bred for an Oscar they say!” Tom said sarcastically.

“Shut up!” I said grabbing the ticket from him and tried deciphering the words myself.

“How can you read it!? You don’t even have your glasses on, love.” He grabbed the tickets from my hand.

“Well! I don’t have to read it because I’m the one who watched those movies, ‘kay?” He was right though. I don’t know why I was trying to fight him over what’s written on the tickets when even non-faded words are blurred to me.

Tom gasped dramatically, “You’ve never watched my film?!”

“Daaaaaaaaamn Tom!”

“What?”

“Of course I’ve watched your films!”

“Oh.” His ears turned really pink again like it did back at the comic book store. “You’ve watched my films?” he had a smug plastered on his face and I swear if I wasn’t so goddamn into him it would be the most annoying thing in the whole world.

“Yeah…”

“Like, everything?”

“…”

“Z?”

“Yeah okay! I did. It was for research! I needed to know if you had…”

“Had what?” Tom pressed on.

“Talent!” I sassed at him.

“OOOH!!! That was low, mate. Real low.” I was laughing hysterically and he joined me.

“I bet you haven’t watched my films” I said as our laughing died down. Tom suddenly made this face and reached out with his right hand.

“What are you doing?” I asked.

“I’m you! When you swung—“ he did the face again with the hand “and you met Zac Efron…like this…” then he started singing “I am brave, I am bruised...” I giggled. He was so stupid but I loved him for it. He could embarrass himself in front of people, none of that “too cool” for you attitude. Ugh. My thoughts were nagging at me to tell him already. A little voice kept saying “Say it. Zendeesha say it!” and it sounded a lot like Darnell. Yet, I still couldn’t find the courage.

“Nooo! The ones before!” I said as I poked him on his side and it tickled him a little. I just need a segway.

“You want me to watch your old films? Like what, when you were 12?”

“Good point. Nevermind.” Okay I don’t need a segway but this is harder than it looks. Do I just blurt it out?

“Like from Frenemies, Zapped, did Shake It Up have a movie? Because I don’t re—”

“Oh fuck you!”

“I personally, like Zac Efron better than the dude from Zapped”

“SHUT UP!” I flipped him.

“Awww come on now, how about you show me some…HAPPY SMILEY FACES!!!”

My eyes grew wide and my jaw swung open. I started swatting him things that were scattered on the floor: the movie tickets, some clothes that weren’t put into their proper bins, other papers that were inside my keepsake box. Tom stood up and tried to protect himself all the while laughing. I was laughing too. He started getting revenge and threw things at me.

“Can you smell the dinner, Z?” Tom teased, using the lines I had said in my very first youtube video that I had done a reaction video to on my app. This was some quality roasting. Not bad Tom, not bad.

He was getting pummeled by all the things I could get my hands on and that caused him to trip on the keepsake box and the contents went tumbling out until the red envelopes could be seen poking out. Tom looked down to see what he had tripped over and I felt my blood rush through me. He picked up the three envelopes, still with his smug face on not knowing that these envelopes were not just any envelopes.

“Oohhh….what are these?” I didn’t say a word. It was too late. I wouldn’t be able to hide it from him any longer and I didn’t see any reason to either.

“Z?”

“Yup?”

“Can I open ‘em?”

“I don’t think you should…they’re sort of…from my…ex.”

“Oh.” He looked at them. “Here. Sorry.” He handed them to me.

“It’s fine. I should probably throw it anyway. No point in keeping them, am I right?” I chuckled, trying to make the situation lighter. I looked down at the envelopes and rubbed my thumb on one them. I don’t know why I still kept them. I didn’t think it mattered.

“They’re love letters…from Valentine’s.” And I don’t know why I said that.

“Oh….yeah…they look like…they are…” Tom swallowed.

“Anyways!” I put the letters aside and sat back down and tried to collect the things we used to throw at each other. Tom squatted down and started to help me. Silence filled the room.

Why did I wait so long to tell him? Now I can’t tell him how I feel.

“Z?”

“Hm?” I said without ever looking up at him, I just kept putting stuff in the keepsake box.

“I don’t mean to be nosy or whatever…I mean, you can…not answer…”

“Go ahead, dude!” I said, trying to pull off a cool and collective Zendaya when I could feel myself getting all nervous again.

“I just uhm, I uh…why do you still uh…keep the, the…letters?”

“Oh.”

“You don’t have to answer. Sorry. None of my business.” Tom said quickly.

“It’s fine! I told you, I’m over it. You can ask me anything about…Trevor. That’s his name.”

“Oh ok.” Tom looked relieved but he was still waiting for my answer.

“I guess. I don’t know... It’s just a reminder that someone had loved me once, you know what I mean? Like, yeah my family and friends…love me but this was different. It was special....Remember, I said that it wasn’t all bad? These letters were one of those ‘not all bad’. I haven’t looked at them since the break-up. It’s not like I’m pining over him. I really am not. It’s just the thought, you know. Someone spending their time to handwrite this thing made just for you.”

“...”

“It cheesy I know…”

“It’s not. It’s sweet.” He gave a weak smile. I didn’t know how to read him. I couldn’t tell what he was thinking. I searched his eyes that wouldn’t look at me but had nailed themselves on the floor. I could see his ears though, pink as ever.

“Zendaya?”

“Tom?”

“Do you think…uhm…” he swallowed. “You think you can…maybe, like someone else? I mean, after Trevor. Have you uh…I mean you said you moved on but can you see your, uhm…”

“Can I like anyone else?”

“Yeah?” His head shot up the way Noon does when I tell him it’s lunch time. So cute. It’s probably not wise to compare Tom to my dog but I love them both, anyways.

Darnell’s voice was in my head again, nagging me that this was the moment, this was the sign I was waiting for. Tom had turned this whole awkward situation to the perfect time to tell him how I felt. How can he do that? He always makes the bad into good somehow even as he stutters and avoids my gaze.

“I do.”

“You do?”

“Like someone…”

“Oh.”

“Tom I-”
“Does—“ We spoke at the same time.

“Oh sorry”
“Sorry” and we did it again.

“What were you gonna say?” Tom said.

“No, you go first.”

“Oh. Uhm. Right. The person you like…does he…make you happy?” He finally looked at me, locking his gaze with mine.

“Definitely.” This was it. I was about to tell him how I felt. That little smile he’s trying to suppress, I can feel that he too knows where this is going.

“Tom—“

“Z! TOM! WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?!” Darnell shouted from the bottom of the stairs. I closed my eyes shut, annoyed at the timing. REALLY DARNELL?!

“Z?! TOM?! THERE’S A PHONE RING—RINGING AND— OH SHIT THERE’S 10 MISSED CALLS!” Darnell continued to shout. I opened my eyes to a shocked Tom with his eyes wide.

“Shit!” Tom ran out and I followed him.

“Shit shit shit shit shit” He said as he grabbed the phone from Darnell.

“Where the hell were you two? Why weren’t you answering me?” Darnell nagged.

“Is that why you left 10 missed calls on Tom’s phone?”

“No. It’s Harrison. I was supposed to be back 30 minutes ago. Shit. I totally forgot. I haven’t packed for anything. Shit. I always lose time when I’m here… Sorry, Z. I have to go. Thanks for having me. I’m gonna miss you guys!” Tom came over and gave Darnell a hug and gave Noon a little rub.

“I’ll walk you out” I said. I followed Tom to the door and closed it behind me. He turned around before we could reach his car.

“Why am I always late for something when I come to your house? I’m pretty sure it’s cursed.” He joked.

“Me too.” I laughed.

“I’m really going to miss you, Zendaya.”

“I’m really going to miss you too, Tom. It’s not like we can’t call each other up. You know that, right?”

“Yeah…but it’s different…from having you around like this…” and with that he hugged me. I clung on as much as I could and tried to memorize how he felt. I won’t have this for a couple of months. It’s not that long, I know, but he’s right. It’s going to be different. So should I tell him now?

We pulled apart and his hands trailed my arms until they were holding my wrists. I wanted to give him something like he gave me the comic book. I wanted to leave him with my feelings, with my heart.

“Bye” he said and he let go of me. He got into his car and I felt the moment pass. I watched him as image got smaller as he drove away.

“Bye.” I whispered to myself. Not even a goodbye because we both knew there wasn’t anything good in our parting. I walked back into the house, restless that I didn’t get to tell Tom that I liked him. All this prepping up for nothing. I wondered if I could just call him up as he drove and just spill it.

“So what did Tom say?” Darnell peeped from behind the kitchen counter.

“He said bye.”

“WHAT?! HOLD UP! HOLD UP!” Darnell said as he clapped his hands together. “When you told him you liked him, he said ‘bye’? What the fuck?”

“Oh. That.”

“Yes. That. Miss Zendeesha? So are we blocking him out fro—“

“I didn’t get to tell him…”

“WHAT!? ZENDAYA MAREE! ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT YOU—“

“YOU CAME IN! I was going to say it and then you came in and started yelling and he had to go and this is all just one big mess…”

Darnell didn’t say anything. He just stared at me, looking pissed. Why was he pissed? He was the one who barged in on me trying to tell Tom that I liked him.

“What if I’m not supposed to tell him Darnell? Why is it so hard? It shouldn’t be this hard.”

“Z…did anything, and I mean ANYTHING you’ve ever gotten in your life come easy?”

“No.”

“NO! So you need to stop making excuses, stop prolonging this and just call up the boy and tell him you like him! It’s never easy to put yourself in a vulnerable position, especially after everything you’ve gone through with Trevor but I BET YO ASS you will regret not telling Tom sooner, and by sooner I mean now that you like him.”

“FINE!” I climbed up the stairs, remembering that I had brought my phone up with me when Tom and I went to the storage room. I come up and realized that Tom and I left the room in disarray. I couldn’t remember where I set down my phone. I looked around and I could feel myself panicking because as more time passed, the faster my courage to tell Tom about my feelings slipped away. Where is it? Where is it? Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Then I found it. Beside the three red envelopes. I rested my hand on top of my phone. This was it. My heart was going to be out in the open again and even though, I could feel somehow that Tom felt the same way…I was terrified. Darnell was right though, if I don’t do it now I’m going to regret it.

If it was out there again, it can be broken again. These letters remind me that there was once something beautiful between Trevor and I. More beauty than pain, if I were to be completely honest. Although, I know that Tom couldn’t hurt me, wouldn’t hurt me, didn’t I think that way before about Trevor? How was this any different? Trevor made me happy too. Tom could just turn out to be another set of old letters I keep at the bottom of a shoebox, ready for another person to find and ask “why do you still keep them?”

But I’ve never had it easy. Darnell was right again. I always had to work for the things I got. Sometimes even harder than if I were a little shade lighter. Why should love be the exception? Acting makes me happy. Dancing makes me happy. This life I’ve built makes me happy but there were tears to be shed so that I knew what happiness looked like. You don’t know joy until you’ve felt pain. You don’t know abundance until you’ve felt loss. Love was just something I needed to work hard for, get a little bruised up for until you find the right one. I’m not saying Tom is the one, I just wanted to tell him I like him, that’s all. Just a little risk.

Ding.

I checked my phone to see if the sound came from it. Nope. No messages. I opened it and searched for Tom’s name.

“Z! Someone’s at the door!” Darnell called out from downstairs. Now he sounds like a grandmother. Who even says that nowadays? Also who the fuck was ringing in tonight?

Ding-ding

“Z! Can ya get the door!? I’m doing the dishes!” Darnell called out again. I dropped my phone. Damn it, Darnell. I swear, it’s YOUR fault I haven’t told Tom how I felt. I ran downstairs and swung the door open. This better be some free vegetarian pizza or I’m—

“Tom?”

“I like you.”

Tom was standing outside my door, shifting his weight from one leg to another. Only a few minutes have gone by since he left and yet here he was in a new change of clothes. I couldn’t believe it. What did he say?

“Like, a lot actually…” he had a boyish smile and I felt lightheaded.

“What time is it? Aren’t you late for your flight? What are you doing here?” I panicked.

“I just— I uhm, did, didya-did you hear what I-what I said?” I did but I couldn’t fucking believe it. This was happening? This was actually happening. The thundering in my heart was like a thousands drums. I breathed in but for some reason I couldn’t release it like my whole body was physically trying to keep this moment forever, keep it in my blood to my bones.

“Yeah… Tom I-“

“I know it’s a risk telling you but I just had to like, I felt like, I felt like I should, I should say it you know? I do. I like you. Ever since.” He was talking so fast that he was also losing his breath but he kept going.

“The very first time I saw you and I keep saying it’s the most embarrassing thing EVER because I made such a fool of myself seeing you…. day one I just. I lost it. Z. I just fell hard. You haven’t even spoken two words to me besides ‘hey man!’ and yet, I, I just. I knew I was in deep. Just like that. And every moment being with you just made me sink in deeper. I’ve just been trying to figure out if I should tell you because, you know, you’re this big star and I-I don’t know. You got out of a break-up and I just got out of one and I didn’t know if you...like me. I’m not saying you do! I’m saying I…do.”

“Tom…”

“I know. I know. I know. Shit.” He paced back and forth. He was still standing outside my door. He had brushed his hair with his fingers and now they were all over the place. “I love our friendship. I do. I don’t want to ruin it. I hope I don’t by doing this. It’s even more complicated because we’re going to work together for two more films and that’s going to be weird, right?” He stopped pacing and looked at me “Having me like you? Because I’m going to like you until then, I think. I feel like I will, you know? It’s not going away. I mean, not to scare you, it’s just having you around makes me, so..so happy and you said you know, if it makes you happy and you really do that to me Z. You’re like fucking sunshine and I—“

I threw myself at him, or more accurately, I threw my lips unto his to shut him up. I couldn’t help it. All this pining and waiting, trying to make sure that I wasn’t going to risk our friendship when this whole time he had felt the same way.

His lips were soft like how I imagined clouds felt like when they looked the way they did when riding an airplane. There was so much longing in the way our lips touched not only my part but I could feel it in him too as he pressed a little harder. We would part for a millisecond catching our breaths then our lips would meet again. I held his face between my hands and towered over him but I felt like he was enveloping me. I could feel his heartbeat pulsate in sync with mine like it was running a marathon. He had wrapped his arms around my waist and I swear, I could have gone on like that forever.

When we pulled apart I could feel a tingly sensation on the spot where his lips were and it cascaded to the rest of my body, like a warmth, like how you drink hot chocolate and the heat flows through you. Our foreheads touched and bit the bottom of my lips. All this worrying and time wasted. If only I had done it sooner.

“I like you too, Tom,” I whispered. But it doesn’t matter because we have now, we have this.

Tom had this wide ass grin on his face and his ears a shade of magenta. I’m not ashamed to say that I, too was smiling ear to ear and I felt like my jaw was going to drop any second from the strain. “You should go. You’re going to be late.” I gave him a little push that caused him to stumble a little like he was in a daze. “I’ll text you.”

“Okay.” He mumbled, barely audible enough to hear. He slowly turned and then stopped midway. He turned to look at me and said, “You’ll wait for me right?”

“Yeah. These feelings won’t change, trust me.”

“Okay...I’ll call you.”

“Okay.” I nodded. He planted another kiss on my lips that took me by surprise.

“For the road.” He said as he shrugged. I shook my head and laughed. He held my hand and tugged it a little as he went away. I watched him as he walked to his car knowing that when he comes back, things were going to be different, but in a good way. In the best way possible. He turned around again.

“GO! You’re late already! Harrison is going to kill you!” He replied to my hollering by flashing me his biggest smile and I felt my heart trying to leap out of my chest wanting to follow him. He moonwalked backward to his car like a nerd and I chuckled. God. I love this, nerd.

“SEE YOU SOON, LOVE!!!” he shouted and my eyes widened hoping the neighbors didn’t hear him but I caught myself, remembering that I didn’t care about what others thought. Thomas fucking Holland likes me back. HAHA SUCKAS.

“I’LL BE HERE, BOO!!” I shouted back. I didn’t know his smile could grow any bigger but it did and I felt the butterflies in my stomach go chaotic. Even if I know that our situation is only going to make me miss him more, I was excited for when the time comes that we’ll see each other again and I’ll be his. And he’ll be mine.

“Finally…” I jumped. It was Darnell.

“How long have you been standing there?” He didn’t reply but instead was smiling at his phone. “Darneesha! I’m talking to you!”

“I just won myself twenty bucks!” still not looking up from his phone.

“You bet on me?”

“No I bet on Tom. Your mom bet on you. I knew it was gon’ be Tom!”

“I don’t believe this!” But I was too happy to be annoyed. Finally, indeed.