stages of grief and strength of will
It’s Denial is what Tony felt when he heard that Maria died on the way to the hospital, but he skips anger and moves straight to bargaining when Obi places his hand on his shoulder, his mind races with thoughts, promises that he’ll do better, be better, be the son she deserves, one worthy of her attention if she’ll just be here to see him do it.
Depression hits harder than Tony’s young mind is truly able to comprehend, it makes him feel weak and he isn’t old enough to how truly strong he is. He is briefly angry at his parents for abandoning him acceptance comes when he realises that they abandoned him the moment the wet nurses first pay check was signed, sealed, and delivered.
That’s not his anger stage. Of course, tony doesn’t realise it nobody else does as they watch him slowly come back to himself. He gets back to work and appears to the public like he is moving onwards and upwards. His friends see more gentle progress but it’s still progress.
The real anger stage comes as he watches uncle Obi being loaded into the back of a police car for the murder of Howard and Maria stark. The autopsy showed a shocking lack of alcohol in Howards blood stream, but the cars analysis showed a severed brake line and several of Obadiah's fingerprints.
Stane killed his parents Tony’s eyes swing between focused and unfocused rapidly at the revelation. Then just like the cold rush of relief the overcame him at the news of Howard’s death, newtons third law comes into effect and burning hot rage seeps into his bones. Tony hires the best lawyers the Stark money can buy and he begins to tear Stane’s life apart. First the court case is prepared. Next his assets are siezed as tony finds every underhanded dealing that has ever occurred at Stanes signature now Stane is not only on trial for murder but treason too with irrefutable evidence. Stane gets multiple life time sentences with no hope of perol.
Tony gets control of stark industries at 19 instead of 21 he immediately decimates it’s legacy of blood, the weapons manufacturing is shut down all contracts with the military are relegated to body armour and non-lethal tech. Tony’s intimate knowledge of bombs is used to make devices that defuse them, they gain better contracts than the ones they had before.
Stark industries start making tech for the general public phones, laptops, software heck Tony gets bored in a board meeting and codes a captain america video game (that Steve does the graphics design for). Tony revolutionises the clean energy field, stark industries becomes the name in clean energy. Tony is heralded as the greatest mind of the generation by the newspapers and Howard stark becomes nothing more than a footnote in Tony’s legacy. Tony takes Stark industries from a multi million dollar company to a multi billion dollar company in a matter of months.
Tony comes home to family every night, aunt Peggy moves into the tower, Rhodey is in temporary residence while on leave as is Carol tony loves when the two co-inside because there is very little that brings him as much joy as a flustered Rhodey, and as always Jarvis and Ana now having moved into the main body of the house leaving the staff wing which Tony happy converts into common rooms where his family can lounge devoid of the high backed chairs and expectations of perfect etiquette that permeated the house before, and the resident super soldiers are now able to make themselves useful in between missions with redecorating.
Every time tony comes home he ends up with his head in someone's lap and Jarvis and Bucky are now in cahoots in their efforts to get him to eat and sleep Tony finds himself minding less and less. Especially when Bucky gives him smiles when he wanders into the kitchen himself.
Tony starts sleeping in his bed finding that his new work schedule requires more than a hard floor but so does Bucky Bear so it’s not exactly a hardship.