The Carnival
The sun was peeking in through your blinds, assaulting your vision. The sunbeams gently licked the sides of your face while glaring uncomfortably through your eyelids. You groggily flipped around, reaching for your phone. You had only one text, from your date.
Sam: See you at noon! Don’t forget! :)
You groaned as you remembered your conversation from yesterday with Sebastian. “ He promised not to be obvious about crashing our date… He better have been honest.” You thought.
You peeled yourself out of bed, like a sticker being pulled from a page. It was hard to let go of the comfort and warmth of security.
You brushed through your hair and put it back in a ponytail. You slid on your usual clunky denim overalls, and your gardening gloves. “I have to make sure I have time to get ready.” You thought, determined to get through your daily tasks quickly.
Turns out, the parsnips needed some weeding along with their watering. By the time you were done it was already 10am. You hurried inside and showered and blow dried your hair.
By the time noon rolled around, you were hurrying out the door towards the bus stop. Sam was already waiting for you, hands deep in his jean pockets. His hair was more kept than usual today. It had been smoothed out. His blonde natural highlights shone brightly in the sun, and his eyes reflected the blueness of the surrounding clear sky.
“Hey, y/n. Just on time.” He said.
You looked behind the broken-down bus that lived permanently at the stop, and saw a small silver car.
“Your chariot awaits.” He smiled.
“Oh, great. It took me a long time this morning, dealing with all the weeds.” You said. You walked around to the passenger side, and Sam hustled behind you. He opened the door before your hand could reach the silver handle. “Thank you.” You said.
“You’re so welcome.” He beamed.
You slid into the car, getting a strong waft of pine air freshener. Sam shut your door and quickly hurried around the car to get in the drivers side. Before you knew it, he was backing out of his parking spot, and drove through the tunnel to get to Zuzu city.
Sam was chatting excitedly about the city, but it sounded like he was speaking underwater. You looked out the window, unconsciously furrowing your brow as you thought about Sebastian.
“Hey, y/n, you good?” He asked, snapping you out of your thoughts.
“Oh, yeah. Just thinking.” You smiled.
“About…?” He asked, eyes focused on the stretching road ahead of you.
“Um… I don’t know.”
“Come on, don’t give me that. What’s up?” He asked, leaning over. His eyes still on the road, his right hand reached over and grabbed your left, sending a jolt of electricity up your arm.
“Just… Excited. I love carnivals.” You said sheepishly, your smile sinking deep in your face.
“Hm. Me too.” He said, pink flushing his cheeks.
His hand stayed with yours for the rest of the drive.
~
Sam pulled into the parking lot. All around there were carnival tents full of rigged games, and a bunch of rides. You saw the rainbow colored ferris wheel in the middle of the fairground. Music filled the area, the loud and upbeat soundwaves reverberating inside the car.
“You ever think about how these rides are trucked around by teenagers? And they’re the ones who take all them down, and they screw all the pieces together.” Sam asked, undoing his seatbelt.
“No, but now that I’ve thought about that I’m not going on any rides.” You joked.
“Spoke too soon, didn’t I?” Sam smirked. He exited the car, and ran around to your side, opening your door for you.
“Thanks.”
“Again, my pleasure.” He smiled.
The two of you stood in line for tickets for a couple minutes. He insisted on paying, which was sweet of him. It reminded you of how Elliot wouldn’t let you even reach for your wallet at the Saloon.
You looked up at Sam, and realized you had never stood so close to him. He was much taller than you thought. He was at least two heads taller than you. He had to look down at you to see your eyes.
Once you got your all-inclusive neon pink wristbands, Sam turned to you, angling his head downwards. “What do you want to do first?”
“Hm… “ You said, turning around to see all the options. In the distance, you saw a big tent and heard the sound of clanking metal from inside. “Bumper cars!” You decided.
“Bumper cars it is.” He said. He casually reached around and tucked his arm over your shoulders. You felt a shiver go up your spine.
“You cold?” He asked. He took his arm off your shoulders and began shoving off his jean jacket.
“No, not cold.” You swallowed. You were surprised by how much you liked his arm around you, safely perched around your shoulders. “Um, you can put your arm back, though, if you want.” You said, staring at the ground.
“Oh. Sure.” He said. He put his arm around you once again and you walked to the bumper car tent side-by-side.
Although you had professed you weren’t interested in a relationship, it was hard not to imagine Sam as your boyfriend. He was so goofy. As you played in the bumper carts, he targeted you so many times, and made your stomach hurt from laughing. And his eyes.... They were just too blue for words.
“ You can’t have feelings for him.” You told yourself. "It's just a date. Not more."
Sam and you had found a spot on a picnic table. He bought you a bucket of mini donuts to share. You were chatting about which ride to try next, and decided on the ferris wheel.
“Sam!” You heard someone call in the distance. Your stomach sank as you remembered the deal you made.
There was Sebastian, accompanied by Abigail and Maru. Sebastian had a strangely vengeful look on his face. He was dressed in his usual black jeans, but today he wore a white shirt and a jean jacket over it. Abigail was dressed in ripped jeans and a cropped black shirt that showed the top of her belly button, and Maru was trailing behind the two of them looking uncomfortable.
“Sebastian.” Sam said, his voice losing its normal playful inflection.
“What are the odds of running into you here?” Sebastian asked. “Oh, hey, y/n. I didn’t realize you guys were here…” He said, eyeing the two of you. You had to look away from Sebastian’s deep brown eyes.
“Are we interrupting? We should leave them alone.” Maru said, rubbing her checkered flannel sleeve nervously.
“Nah, why don’t we merge our parties?” Sebastian said quickly, before Sam could say anything.
Abby studied you carefully for a moment with her hazy blue eyes. “Sam, is it really okay if we join you?” She asked seriously.
“Sam is our best friend. He wouldn’t say no.” Sebastian said, as if he was daring Sam to disagree. You couldn’t help but feel bad, like Sebastian was putting his friendship with Sam on the line just for you.
“Ah… Y/n, what do you think?” Sam asked, his pleading blue eyes looking into yours. You had to look away.
“I mean… The more the merrier, right?” You said hesitantly, rubbing the back of your neck. You didn’t know them well enough to tell them to leave you guys alone, and besides, you made this plan with Sebastian ahead of time.
“Great.” Sebastian said, sliding into the picnic bench between you and Sam. He popped a mini-donut into his mouth. “Where we headed next?”
“We were going to go on the ferris wheel.” Sam offered.
“No way. Ferris wheels are an end of the night kind of thing. We need to play some games.” Sebastian said. “Right, Abby?”
You looked over at Abby and Maru, who both looked uncomfortable. Abigail sighed in response. “Yeah, I do like the ring toss.”
“Perfect. Let’s go.” He said, picking up the mini donut bucket and leading you all to the section of the fairground with all the game booths.
The five of you walked to the ring toss booth. Sam smiled like a little kid when he saw all the prizes on the shelf, and you couldn’t help but smile as you gazed at him.
“Look at that bunny, y/n. I’m going to win you that.” He said excitedly.
“Aw, how cute.” Sebastian rolled his eyes sarcastically before you could say anything.
“You don’t have to, Sam.” You smiled. “These games are so rigged.”
“No, I’m going to do it. Just you wait!” He said, already pulling out his wallet to hand some cash to the vendor dressed in a red pinstripe suit.
“I think I want a bunny like that, too.” Sebastian said, pulling out his own dark leather wallet. He handed a crisp bill to the man.
“Sebastian, seriously?” Sam sighed.
“What? It’s a free country.” Sebastian retorted.
“What are you going to do with a giant pink bunny?” Sam asked. You could see his face start to get red with anger.
“Lots of things.” Sebastian rolled his eyes.
“You’re just doing it because I want it. What is with you today, man?” Sam’s voice was raising.
“Honestly, shut up. Why do you think you’re so much fucking better than me? What if I just want a pink bunny for myself?” Sebastian started to match Sam’s tone.
You felt someone tugging on your arm as Sam and Sebastian continued to bicker. “Y/n, come get a slushie with us.” Maru’s soft voice whispered in your ear. You were grateful for the escape. You and Sam had been having a nice time before Sebastian got here, but now Sam was only interested in arguing.
Maru kept her arm entwined with yours. You looked over at her and smiled. Her skin was a light ocher that reflected the sun, and her shoulder length hair was blowing in the breeze.
Abby hurried to grab your other arm. You looked at her pale porcelain arm against your tanned one and smiled. “You guys are saving me right now.” You sighed.
“They don’t argue like that often, but when they do…” Abby sighed. “Sorry we ruined your date.” Her black Birkenstock sandals slapped against the fairground grass.
“Really sorry.” Maru echoed. “I’ll make it up to you, let me buy you a slushie.”
“ You guys didn’t ruin it.” You said, and immediately regretted those words slipping from your mouth. It’s true Sebastian kind of ruined your date, but it was also true that you had kind of asked him to.
“Sebastian’s been weird this last little bit.” Maru said, steering your arm towards the slushie line.
“Ever since you got here, y/n.” Abby said knowingly. “I get it, though. You’re really cute.”
“Oh.” Your cheeks started to flush. “Thanks. But that can’t be it. I’ve only been here for like, a week.”
“Sebastian’s competitive.” Maru offered.
You ordered your favorite slushie flavor. It melted on your tongue, and the sugar perked you up. Maru got grape, and Abby got blue raspberry.
The three of you walked back to the ring toss booth and noticed a crowd of people gathering around something. You heard shouting. A deep, nauseating feeling permeated your stomach. Maru must have felt it, too, because she let go of your arm and ran towards the crowd.
“SEBASTIAN! What are you doing!?” She shrieked, dropping her slushie on the ground. It splashed back up at her, covering her clothes in purple liquid.
You and Abby ran towards Maru and craned your necks to see what was going on.
You were greeted to the sight of Sam and Sebastian locked into each other on the ground, throwing billowing punches at each other.
~
You rode home with Abigail and Maru. Maru was fuming. She kept saying how Sebastian and Sam would have to drive back together and work out their differences.
Abby walked you home, and then disappeared into the night.
You stood alone on your deck, looking up at the stars, trying to hold back tears. Your date had been going so well. “ This is my own fault…” You sighed.
You started walking to clear your head, and before you knew it, you were heading through the forest on your farm towards Marnie’s ranch. You walked down, near the cliff, through the trees, and towards the pond, pacing without any good destination in mind.
You saw a figure, standing by themselves on the river dock, drinking something. You sighed as you shuffled past, trying to be quiet, but the figure turned around. You stood, frozen at being caught wandering around in the darkness.
“Oh great, my hiding spot has been discovered.” Shane grumbled at you as you walked by.
You stopped walking and turned on your heel to face him, taking a deep breath of fresh air. You didn’t have the patience to be polite tonight anymore. “I’m not in the mood for your sour attitude.” You said.
”No? Then why stop walking at all? Must be something on your mind.” He smirked in the darkness.
“You were being rude. For the record, you were rude the other day at the Saloon, too, but I could tolerate it in front of Gus.” You said, digging your heel into the dirt. “And when I introduced myself the second day I was here you told me to leave you alone. As a new girl, that’s super shitty to hear.” You didn’t know what came over you, but all of your tension and anger was pouring out at once, towards an unfriendly stranger.
You got yourself to calm down by breathing in and out slowly. You paused, then looked up at Shane, who was just studying you with his dark eyes.
“You look like you need a drink.” Shane said, unhinging a beer from it’s plastic and throwing it towards you.
You held it, but couldn’t think of anything to say. “Um, thanks.” You said. You stood frozen, still.
“Don’t thank me for giving you alcohol. That’s morally a bad thing to do.” Shane sighed, throwing back his head and chugging the last of his own beer. He threw the can into the lake. “I know littering is bad too, but I don’t want to hear shit about it, okay?”
“I’m not in the mood to argue.” You said, your voice emotionless.
“I figured. Rough night?” He asked.
“Rough life, more like.” You opened the beer and chugged it. It burned your throat and warmed your esophagus, but you couldn’t stop. You kept chugging until it was empty, and then with all your strength and anger, you tossed the can into the lake. “ Of course, when I thought maybe I could go on a date and everything would be fine…” You thought. You remembered your ex, who told you that you were broken. That you ruined people. You sighed angrily as you thought about the fact you may have ruined Sam and Sebastian’s friendship.
“I know the feeling.” Shane said, throwing you another beer. “Woman after my own heart, chugging a beer like that.”
“You switched your tone real fast, Shane. And, I’m not after anyone’s heart. I just need something right now.” You said, opening your second drink.
“Full disclosure, Marnie told me about your date with Sam today. I don’t give a shit about stupid gossip, but that must not have gone so hot, hey?” He asked, casually opening another bitter drink for himself.
“Not really. He got into a fight with Sebastian. Like, a real fight, with punching.” You said. You took a sip of your beer, remembering the time when punches like that were normal in your world. You were surprising yourself how easily you were talking to Shane, but somewhere deep down you felt like he wouldn’t judge you.
“Fuck. Over what?” He asked.
“A stupid pink rabbit. Sam wanted to win it, then Sebastian did, then…” You said, gesturing with your hands.
“Ah. Sam wanted to win it for you?” Shane asked.
“Yeah.” Your voice darkened.
“You got some boys fighting over you.” Shane decided.
“Not intentionally.” You sighed.
Shane and you stood in silence for a couple minutes, watching the still river flow in the moonlight, reflecting the stars in its inky darkness.
“I’m not really a good person to talk to about this kind of shit.” He said. “I don’t really care about gossip.”
“You mentioned.” You smirked.
“No, I was going to say, I don’t care about gossip, but a fight is kind of big news for a boring town.” His black hair blended into the moonlight, his rough hand rubbing his stubbled chin.
“So you do care about gossip?” You asked.
“Not at all.” He said. “Just saying, it’ll get around.” He drank the last of his second beer.
You sighed. “Why are you just standing out here, drinking by yourself?”
“It’s quiet.” He said simply.
You stood in silence for another moment, hearing only the rustle of a light breeze through the trees. “It is. Maybe I’ll come out here more often.”
“Nah. Don’t do that. A girl like you shouldn’t be out so late, especially not drinking with a guy like me.” He said.
“What does that mean?” You asked.
“No. Not elaborating. If you know what’s good for you, you’ll generally avoid me.” He said.
“...But the stars are so bright.” You said, throwing your head back, looking at the bright shining bulbs in the sky.
“From this angle.” He answered.
~
The next morning, you awoke to a text from Sebastian.
Seb: Hey, can we talk?
You sighed, thumbs resting on the keyboard, as you wondered how you were going to reply.