In which Tony once ate a butterfly
"Mr. Stark?" Peter asked looking up from his science book.
"What kid?" Tony replied glancing up from the wires he was rerouting on a gauntlet.
"What do you think butterflies taste like?" Peter mused.
"They taste bad," Tony shuttered remembering the most disgusting thing he had ever done.
"I got it," Rhodey said stopping on the sidewalk. Tony instantly knew he was in for it. He really didn't know why he had agreed to their stupid bet where whoever did the most embarrassing things during the school year had to do something especially horrible at the other's bidding. Tony naturally had lost.
Rhodey stooped down and picked up a dead butterfly off the sidewalk.
"No!" Tony cried and took a step back, "What ever you are thinking, no."
His roomate grinned, "Yes. You lost. I get to make you do something, and I want you to eat this here butterfly."
Tony gagged just thinking about putting it in his mouth.
"No. I will do anything but that!"
Rhodey crossed his arms, "Anything?"
Tony realised that maybe eating a butterfly was actually getting off easy.
"No. Fine I'll eat the damn bug."
"Bro! Have some respect for the dead!"
"Dude! You just told me to eat it!" Tony cried.
"That is respecting it. You are making sure it doesn't go to waste," Rhodey explained.
"No. You are using this poor creature who deserves a restful death as an implement of torture. You should be ashamed of yourself!" Tony quipped and took the butterfly out his roommates hand.
"Just eat the damn insect!"
"Now who's damning the poor bug..." Tony grumbled as he lifted the bug to his face. He was never going to make another bet with Rhodey for as long he lived.
"Hey what are guys doing?" Tony jumped and hid the butterfly behind his back at the sound Carol's cheerful voice.
"Nothing-" Tony started.
"Tony is going to eat a butterfly," Rhodey smirked.
"That is very intelligent. Good job Tony. A+ brains on that one," Carol laughed, "I take it you lost the bet?"
Had Rhodey told everyone?
"He sure did! Didn't you buddy," Rhodey ruffled Tony's hair as he glared nefariously at his roommate.
"All right Tones. I'm waiting. Eat up," Carol demanded. Tony begrudgingly hunched his shoulders and lifted the butterfly to his face.
"Do I have to?" He whined.
"Yes." Rhodey and Carol spoke in unison.
"And make sure you chew it up nice and good," Carol added.
"Yeah, you gotta chew buddy."
Tony opened his mouth and popped the bug in. The putrid taste filled Tony's mouth. His stomach clenched as the horrible taste, of salt and slime mixed with some other revolting taste that he couldn't place, washed over his taste buds. Then he chewed. The bug crunched under his teeth. Its follicled legs stuck to the roof of his mouth and the wings and their dust rubbed and crumpled under his teeth and crunched with a gut wrenching crinkle. Its little antenas tickled against the back of his throat, once again triggering his gag reflexes. He swallowed hard, forcing the bug down his throat. It was rough and tickled as it went down. He gagged, and swallowed back yet another urge to upchuck. The acid bile like taste still swam in his mouth. He swallowed one more time making sure that the nasty thing stayed down.
Rhodey and Carol were on the ground rolling in hysterics.
"Are you happy?!" Tony demanded angrily.
"So happy!" Rhodey sang in between laughs.
Tony was never going to look at butterflies the same way.
"Mr. Stark? How do you know that?" Peter asked with confusion and concern in his gaze.
"I answered your question! That is all you get!" Tony said his voice raising just a few octaves to high. Nobody else needed to know what he had done on that last day of his freshman year of college.